Pick Your Battles

[Papyrus attempts sumo wrestling]

"Papyrus... are you sure about this?"

Asgore stood timidly in one end of the ring, wearing little more than a standard-issue wrestling belt his sparring partner acquired from unknown place. He looked over himself briefly, noting several areas where he really should have put a more care in handling his fur, as it was all frazzled Papyrus was situated in front of him, also wearing the same, although a significantly smaller version. The skeleton posed proudly, his clean and shiny bones just about glinting in the sunlight.

"OF COURSE, YOUR MAJESTY!" he said. "I'VE READ EVERYTHING THERE IS TO KNOW ABOUT THIS 'SUMO' SPORT, AND I'M ABSOLUTELY SURE YOU WOULD QUALIFY AS THE BEST POSSIBLE OPPONENT."

"Golly, that's sweet of you." the boss monster smiled, cracking his knuckles. The noise made Papyrus cringe beyond all reasonable levels. "Oh, sorry about that."

"I-IT'S ALRIGHT. HAVE TO LIMBER UP, AFTER ALL." Papyrus tried playing it off and instead positioned himself exactly like he'd seen on the internet, one foot after another. "YOU HAVE TO ASSUME THIS POSITION, FIRST."

"Alright." Asgore nodded and repeated the same motion, the small ring just about trembling to the force of his strong legs hitting the ground.

"AND NOW, AT THE SOUND OF THE BELL, WE RUSH AT EACH OTHER. WHOEVER GETS PUSHED OUT, LOSES!" Papyrus said, grinning already. He has several rows of battle plans prepared for such an occasion

"I guess that doesn't sound too bad..." Asgore still had plenty of doubts about the upcoming bout, but decided to at least humor the skeleton a bit. "Ready, Papyrus? Frisk?"

The human stood a couple feet from the makeshift ring, with a bell and a little plastic hammer in their hands. They were dressed just like a real wrestling referee, except with a nurse's hat on top, indicating they did anticipate a number of things going wrong.

"ALRIGHT THEN!" Papyrus announced. "LET'S SEE WHO WILL BE LEFT STANDING BY THE END!"

As the two combatants tensed, Frisk sighed deeply and hit the bell.

-     -     -

Sans snorted, waking up to the sight of a part of the ceiling falling next to his bed. The skeleton couldn't quite place the phenomenon for a moment, but never really had time to register what exactly was going on, as barely a minute later, his phone rang.

It was Papyrus.

"hey bro." Sans interrupted the greeting with a brief yawn, scratching the top of his bony head. "how's the training going?"

"QUITE WELL!" his brother announced, though through a series of pained whimpers indicated otherwise. "COULD I ASK FOR A SMALL FAVOR THOUGH?"

Sans felt a bit of cold sweat forming on his forehead.

"sure papyrus... what do you need?"

"WELL, IF YOU'RE ON YOUR WAY UP, COULD YOU GRAB THE QUICK-CAST KIT FROM THE MEDICINE CABINET?"

Oh no.

"alright, i'll be there right away. just don't move, okay?"

The skeleton quickly scrambled to his feet, looking for at least one pair of loose socks he could put on.

"I DON'T THINK YOU HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THAT." he said, confirming at least one set of Sans' fears. "THANK YOU, FRISK, COULD YOU MOVE THE PHONE A LITTLE BIT TO THE LEFT?"

Once he acquired a pair of socks, he headed out of the room the grab Papyrus his first-aid kit. He really should have expected something like this to happen, looking back at it.

"OH AND SANS, ONE MORE THING?"

"go ahead, papyrus."

The boisterous skeleton groaned in a mixture of pain and annoyance on the other end.

"GRAB THE JUG OF MILK FROM THE FRIDGE. I COULD USE A DRINK."