Last Dance (Misha)

Last Dance



I guess the school year really is starting to fly by after summer vacation. I don't even remember doing all the work to set up this dance event here at Yamaku, but here it is, happening tonight. Most of the paperwork must have slipped by while I was on snack duty. It's a good thing Shicchan and Hicchan are so capable! The student council has become ten times more efficient with the addition of just one more member, so planning and putting together events like these has become so much easier.
I wish I could say that for everything else, too.
The three of us stand outside in the warm summer air, the blurred sounds of music drifting softly from inside the auditorium. A soft canvas of millions of stars shine in the sky above us, and as I take in the sight of our student council president, I think the stars have some serious competition tonight. Clad in a dazzling blue dress that sparkles like sapphires in the pale moonlight, Shizune looks like something from out of a painting. Not one to pass up a fun opportunity to show off, my own dress is a deep red, and Hisao is dressed in a smart tuxedo. I can't resist poking a little fun at him.
“You look like a special agent, Hicchan!” I say with a grin.
“Well of course,” He adjusts his tie dramatically. “The government of Japan sent me to protect these two lovely ladies for the evening.”
“[Well with any luck, your services won't be required tonight.]” Shizune grins mischievously as she signs, and then begins to march toward the double doors leading into the auditorium. The two of us follow obediently, walking proudly. The student council has arrived!
As we enter, we pass banners and streamers that we must have put up over the last few days, but their words all blur together in my vision as the sight of people everywhere, dancing and having fun, takes priority. The music is some familiar, upbeat piece that I've heard before somewhere, and I feel the heat from the crowds all around me. In the corner of my eye, I see Mutou and the school's nurse standing around looking listless, while that kid from class 3-2, the one with the thick glasses and scarf, tiptoes towards the punch bowl behind them with some kind of bottle in his hand. Part of me wants to be responsible and apprehend the miscreant, but the rest of me wants to see what happens next. Either way, my attention is stolen by the familiar snapping of fingers, so loud that I can hear it clearly even above the noise of the crowd and the music.
I turn to see Shicchan, standing on the dance floor, staring straight back at me. People move around her on all sides, but she's still, like a rock, like a mountain. And she's gesturing for me to join her.
My heart skips a beat. I half trip, half run to close the distance between us. She just stands there, smiling. We're so close now. The rest of the world falls away.
The music changes to something slow and steady. Our hands interlace.
We begin to dance.
The feeling of being this close to her is intoxicating. Her eyes gaze straight into mine, our bodies swaying to the beat, gently. And she's still smiling, that gentle, warm smile that no one else knows exists. The smile that you could wrap around yourself and fall asleep in on a rainy day. The smile that only I've--
Only I've...
As much as I don't want to, I tear my gaze away from those dark pools of light in front of me. We're still dancing slowly, sensually, but I can't see the faces of any of the other dancers around us. Somewhere off in the crowd I see Hisao, and, I think, Lilly. And the members of the old student council and my parents are there? I don't-
Shizune's body stops, and mine follows suit a moment later. I look back into those eyes, as her arms wrap around my back and pull me close.
Our faces level, inches apart, Shizune looks me straight in the eyes, and I see pity. And sadness. And regret.
Oh, no.
Oh, no, no, no.
I feel my own eyes begin to burn.
Not again.
She moves closer and I feel those warm, soft lips, the ones that have filled my imagination, on my forehead.
“Misha.” She whispers, in a voice as soft and light as the evening breeze. It's like my mother reading me a story before bed. It's like the train announcing the stop that takes me home. It's everything, everything that I want.
Everything that I can't have.
My feeble efforts at stopping the tears aren't enough.
“Misha, wake up.”
And who am I to disobey the student council president?


My damp eyelids flutter open, and the world pours in. I must have fallen asleep behind the main building at Yamaku. Daylight shines down from above, but I feel cold despite the warm, crisp air around me. I wipe my eyes as I struggle to my feet, trying to look casual in case anyone else is around to watch.
This isn't fair.
Deep breaths now. I can't fall apart. It will take more than that to stop me. I can't fall right now. I don't know if anyone would catch me if I did.
I dust myself off for a few seconds, torn between heading to the student council room to see if there's any work that could take my mind off things, or seeking the comforting solitude of my own room. Not ready to brave the thought of sleep again so soon, however, I side with the first option.
Time to go. Time to keep moving. I can't stop walking, I can't stop smiling. Old habits die hard.
Like some other old things.







“Last Dance” is a song by Dirty Three.