MG PSA - Slimes

Slimes, one of the most common MG’s in the world. Ranging from various species their overall intellect and ability range from a lowly blue slime to the near godly powers of a slime queen, slimes are one of the most diverse of MG’s. However because most slimes require obscene amounts of protein and other nutrients to maintain a semblance of a mind most tend to be, a bit dull.

That being said they are still capable of rational thought and should be treated as one would a child, unless their capable of seeing that as patronizing. Which in that case just treat them like everyone else. In terms of a threat all you need is a bit of salt, dehydration spray or be near a large body of water. Salt and dehydration sprays would rob them of their precious liquids, while large bodies of water dilute their solution, preventing them from maintaining a body. Do not fret if a Slime hits a body of water. They all possess a core which in a way contains her soul. As long as a Slime’s Core is intact, they’ll be able to regenerate back to full health. However it’s best advised to call emergency services if you spot a Slime in moving water, as it’s highly likely for them to have their Core shattered, killing them instantly. If you, like many others, find a slime squeezing out of your bathroom as many often do, simply hold their Core and crank the current to the highest setting. They will dissipate but will still regrow after a short while.

If you see a lost Slime, call 911 as they will pick her up and provide her with the education and supplements to feed a growing goo. Be warned though as the longer a Slime lives, the more likely she is to remember things from the past, so don’t be surprised if a few years down the line the same little Slime girl would turn into a Slime Queen and meet you for a little visit.

Now I know there have been rumors of a “Slime Underground”, where homeless males are captured by renegade Slime Girls to be used as a source of pleasure and sustenance. This rumor when linked to the increasing rate of missing person’s cases this is highly likely. However Slimes require a constant source of water, so most don't go to suburbia. Slimes then to be uncoordinated in attacks and as such can only get those who are completely helpless. Rest assured this problem will be resolved soon.

This is Mr. Nemo, signing off.