Celestia and DealerAnon Pt. 1

>Be Anon
>You are currently having the adrenaline rush of your life
>You were woken up by the sound of pots and pans clanging in the downstairs kitchen
>So, like any self-respecting small-time drug dealer with a slight Napoleon complex and fairly unwarranted paranoia issues, you threw on some sweatpants and grabbed your strap
>You are currently sneaking downstairs, your trusty .45 in your hand to dispose of any unwanted herons
>The cold air and the numerous pieces of dirty laundry on the stairs do nothing to deter you, despite the temperature sending your dong into retract mode
>As you draw nearer to your objective, you smell the faint scent of bacon, presumably emanating from the kitchen
>Your hands are sweating profusely, for what form of villain would invade your home at 6 AM to eat your bacon?
>Pressing yourself against the kitchen door, you take hold of the doorknob, ready to unleash hot lead on anything inside
>You fling open the door and bring your gun up, aiming it at a rather distraught woman with multi-colored hair holding some eggshells
''Surprise motherfu- Celestia?''
>''Uh, h-hi Anon. Heh.''
>She is pressed up against the wall with a nervous smile plastered on her face, her eyes rapidly flicking between the barrel and your face
>Right
>You lower your gun and put the safety back on with a resounding click
''Sorry about that.''
>You smile sheepishly
>Celestia was something of a family friend, and used to teach at the local high school back when you still studied there
>She was always chill, and helped you out of a couple tight spots during your stay
>And you also had a slight crush on her back then
>Looking at her now, you definitely remember why
>Those legs were still as long and smooth as ever
>That skin was just as pale and flawless as before
>And her hair still flowed in that weird-but-amazing way
>But cute or not, she had still broken into your home
''Why are you in my house?''
>You ask, suspicion evident in your voice
>''I was just uh, cooking you breakfast! Yeah. Breakfast.''
>Her eyes dart around nervously, the embarrassed blush on her face plainly tells you that she'd want to be anywhere but here right now
''Uh huh. So, you make it a habit of breaking and entering random peoples' houses just to fry bacon, or what?''
>''Well, not really.''
>She gives a long sigh, giving her best impression of a sad, deflating balloon animal
>''Truth is, well, I kind of need a place to stay.''
>She mutters, looking downcast
>''And if it matters, I'm sorry for sneaking in. It's just, I hoped you'd be more open to the idea after some breakfast.''
>A place to stay? WHAT?
''Wait, wait, just hold up. You need a place to stay?''
>She nods
''As in, here?''
>She nods again
''As in, you need to stay at my place?''
>Not even Sid Vicious nodded this much
>You grin
''I call bullshit, man. You're a principal, for fuck's sake! Why would you need to crash here?''
>''Was.''
''What's that?''
>''I was a principal. Up until last week, or so.''
''Oh.''
>''Yeah.''
>The pregnant silence between you is broken by the sound of bacon and eggs sizzling
>''So, yes or no?''
>She looks at you hopefully
''Shit man, I don't know. Let's just have some breakfast first. I really need to think this over.''

>You take a sip of your coffee, basking in the afterglow of bacon and eggs
>Across from you sits the ex-principal, fiddling nervously with her hair
>The awkward is strong
''So, can't you stay with your sister or something? Don't you have anything saved up?''
>''I would, but I have no idea where she is.''
>She lets out an exasperated sigh
>''Her cell's dead, the house is empty, and no-one at the school has seen her since last Friday.''
''What about your home? As much as I appreciate the food, don't you have anywhere to go?''
>She sighs again and looks at the table again
>You notice that her eyes are developing dark bags and that her hair looks frazzled
>She is good at hiding it, but anyone could see that she is incredibly tired
>''My home was school owned. Lost it with the job.''
''Oh.''
>You scratch your neck
>This is definitely not what you need right now
>But she is still a family friend
>Besides, it's probably just going to be a short while, right?
''Uh, how long are you gonna be staying?''
>She brightens up a bit when you break the silence
>''Oh, about two or three days, I think. I submitted an application for an apartment not far from here, I'm just waiting for it to go through.''
''Well, if it's only three days, then sure, knock yourself out.''
>She slumps backwards, looking incredibly relaxed from the news
>''Thank you. I could do the dishes if you want me to.''
>She gives you a warm smile
>Still as pretty as in High School
''Sure.''
>Shaking yourself from your thoughts, you drain the last of your coffee and rise up
''Try to get some sleep, okay? You look like you've been up for days.''
>You give her a small smile and head outside for a cigarette and some thinking time
>Your exit is accompanied by the sweet sound of dishes being washed for the first time in days
>Lighting your Camel to the sounds of Marche de Disque as performed by Celestia, you finally let this morning's events sink in
''Motherfucker.''