F:NG - Revised G.O.A.T.

[b]1. While working as an intern in the clinic, a patient with a strange infection on his foot stumbles through the door. The infection is spreading at an alarming rate, but the doctor has stepped out for a while. What do you do?[/b]
>a. Amputate the foot before the infection spreads. - Melee
>b. Calm the patient with soothing words, congratulating him for a life well spent. - Speech
>c. Rush to the shelves and stuff the patient's mouth with every pill you find. - Medicine
>d. Restrain the patient and observe as the infection spreads. Take notes for future reference. - Science
>e. Light up some candles and pray to the Five Bodhisattvas of Compassion. - Faith

[b]2. You cross paths with a wandering wizard, and accidentally bump into him. Infuriated, he challenges you to a duel. What do you do?[/b]
>a. Bargain your life by giving him that awesome artifact you found in your basement a few weeks ago. - Barter
>b. Show him your boomstick. There's nothing better than a .44 revolver. - Guns
>c. Cast FIST. - Unarmed
>d. Open a portal to the seventh non-euclidean dimension and let you old friend Hastur deal with this pest. - Magic
>e. Watch as the frag grenade you put in his pocket blows up in his face. Well, in his pants to be precise. - Explosives

[b]3. Boo! A karakasa youkai has spooked you from behind! How do you react?[/b]
>a. Remain nonplussed. Tell her that the dullahan you met earlier was way scarier. - Speech
>b. Luckily you remembered to bring your taser, just in case of youkai attack. - Energy Weapons
>c. Wrestle the umbrella out of her grasp and beat her up with it. Tell her to stop hitting herself. - Melee
>d. Ask her if she has heard about your lord and savior Kuan Yin. - Faith
>e. Show her the broken joint on her umbrella, and offer yourself to fix it up. - Repair

[b]4. You meet Buddha himself on the road. What do you do?[/b]
>a. Steal from his pouch as you walk past him. Someone as fat as that guy must be filthy rich. - Sneak
>b. Shoot him in the back. You don't like how he's looking at you with those squinty eyes. - Guns
>c. Ignore him. You need not a phony god's blessing, for you are already enlightened by your own intelligence. - Science
>d. Purchase his pearl collar, then sell it at thrice its value back in your town, as it's blessed by the big guy himself. - Barter
>e. Ask him if he's encountered any monsters on his way. Chances are you will meet them too later. - Survival

[b]5. A fairy has pranked you, and you decide it would be fair to get back at her. You enter her private room when no one is looking, and...[/b]
>a. Move all her furniture ever so slightly. When she comes back, she'll be hitting her toes all over the place. - Sneak
>b. Mess with her toaster's circuitry. It's like a death ray with a smaller power supply, in a certain way. - Repair
>c. Hide an stimulant capsule in her sugar pot. An overexcited fairy is a funny sight to behold after the morning coffee. - Medicine
>d. Pick her diary's lock and rip all the pages. Now she'll have to live with the embarrassment of someone knowing her secrets. - Lockpick
>e. Booby trap her front door. It'll surely cause a mess, but it's alright. Fairies revive quickly. - Explosives

[b]6. Your friend the shopkeeper is in possession of a rare magic tome, original edition. You want it, but the tab he keeps on you is way too big and he won't lend it to you like that. What's the best way to obtain it?[/b]
>a. Put a charm spell on him. Now he's only yours to command. Score! - Magic
>b. Fix one of those electronic shikigami of his in exchange for the book. - Repair
>c. Wait until night, break into his home and steal it while he's asleep. - Sneak
>d. Prepare him a nice meal. The way to his heart is through his stomach. - Survival
>e. Give him your best puppy eyes. You know he can't resist your cuteness. - Speech

[b]7. Your kappa friend has finished building her own mecha robot. It looks awesome, but she feels it lacks something, and asks you for advice. What do you tell her?[/b]
>a. A 20 gauge shotgun on its wrist. More stopping power against those filthy 5mm peasants. - Guns
>b. Needs more lasers. You can never have enough lasers. Better yet, make it shoot them from its eyes. - Energy Weapons
>c. A shoulder-mounted Fat Man. This robot will be the missing gear between infantry and artillery. - Explosives
>d. An humanoid robot does not deserve to be called a 'mecha' if it can't perform the Rocket Punch. - Unarmed
>e. Install a Stealth Boy and retractable swords. You can't get any cooler than an invisible ninja robot. - Sneak

[b]8. A gap youkai invites you to tea, but you're surprised when she challenges you to steal from the resident shrine maiden's donation box. What do you do?[/b]
>a. Pick the box's lock, get the money and put the lock back. Hope the miko doesn't notice... - Lockpick
>b. Offer your own savings, pretending to be the donation money. - Barter
>c. Take a hammer and smash the box open. Get the money and smash the youkai's head in. - Melee
>d. Program the nearby cleaning autobot to get the money for you. - Science
>e. Tell her you'll consider it once she stops spiking your tea with drugs. - Survival

[b]9. Uh oh! You've been "randomly selected" to participate in a drinking contest against an oni! What could you do to stand a chance?[/b]
>a. Hide an electric shocker on your sleeve. Use it on yourself everytime you feel like passing out. - Energy Weapons
>b. Conjure a portal from your throat to the oni's stomach, so that she drinks for both of you. - Magic
>c. Consume a small dose of arsenic and (rightfully) claim you are too sick to go to the party. - Medicine
>d. Pray to the Anti-Christ and ask him to turn your wine into water. - Faith
>e. Alcohol is for idiots with no care for their livers. Challenge her to an arm wrestling contest instead. - Unarmed