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- >Today was a day like any other in the hallowed halls of Canterlot High.
- >Everybody had weird skin, conflict was resolved by music and talking, and everybody was nice in a weird way to one another.
- >Yeah.
- >As the only "real" human in the whole shitshow, you were just about ready to kill yourself.
- >Twilight sent you here when she discovered the Mirror.
- >She thought you'd be happier here, amongst your kind.
- >Except these pastiches of human beings were NOT your kind.
- >Though you have to admit, after not getting any for so long, just looking at something vaguely human shaped did it for you.
- >You hum quietely to yourself as you watch the human equivalent of the Flowershop Trio strut down the hallway.
- "Left, right, left-right-left. Unf."
- >Suddenly something smacks the back of your head.
- >"Ugh, if you were staring any harder, you'd like, hurt your eyes."
- >Oh yeah.
- >And you actually made a friend.
- "Sup faggot. Shouldn't you be in class?"
- >"Ugh. The Great and Powerful Trixie has better things to do than listen about world history. I wasn't there, so why should I care?"
- "Remind me to tell you about the pitfalls of solipsism?"
- >"What?"
- "Don't worry about it. Anyway, do you have a reason to be here? Or are you here to make my life even worse? Or did you decide that it's finally time for me to fuck your tight butthole?"
- >She rolls her eyes and scoffs at you.
- ">As if the Great and Powerful Trixe would let you anywhere near her tight booty."
- >She gives her booty a slap.
- >And as much as you'd never admit it to her.
- >You would totally fuck the living bejeezus out of her.
- >"Anyway, nerd, I thought I'd let you know - someone else came through the portal?"
- >You give her a disdainful look.
- "And? This is..."
- >"Listen to me, you dumb homo tool. I came up to her to say hi and stuff, you know, just in case this one is also a magical pony princess or something."
- >Her fists ball up.
- >Whoah, Trixie is mad.
- >Like, legit mad, not just mildly annoyed.
- >You metaphorically perk your ears up.
- "All right, so? You said hi and? Get to the point, you cumdumpster."
- >She baps you on the back of the head again.
- >"Anyway, I say hi? She takes one look at me, freaks the FUCK out, PUSHES me to the floor, and runs off in the direction of the library."
- "What the fuck? I mean you're an insufferable cunt, but I'd never like, hurt you."
- >Trixie narrows her eyes at you.
- >"What's that supposed to mean, you stupid goblin?"
- "Nothing - despite me shitting on you constantly, I actually barely tolerate you as a person."
- >She looks at you hard and then giggles.
- >Damn that was pretty cute actually.
- >"You sappy loser. All right, since you're OBVIOUSLY smitten with the Great and Powerful Trixie, I need your help."
- >You raise an eyebrow.
- "Who the fuck are you and what did you do to my best friend Trixie? She never asks for help."
- >"AHEM."
- "I'm not calling you Great and Powerful. Fuck that noise."
- >She eyes you up and down.
- >"Fine. Anyway. Listen, here's the plan."
- >She leans over and starts whispering in your ear.
- >Whoah.
- >You never realized you'd find that this hot.
- >You lose track of her words for a moment to mentally wrestle your dick down.
- >Then as she keeps going, you start grinning wider and wider.
- >Yes, this just might be the momentarily diversion that you need.
- "Yo Starlight?! Starlight Glimmer?!"
- >You actually bothered to remember her name.
- >You were pretty aces with the Rainbooms and they knew some of your "special" status, so they let you send a message to Twilight.
- >So you knew who she was and why she was here.
- >Apparently, she needed to make some non-pony friends.
- >And guess what you weren't?
- >Twilight even name-dropped you to her at some point in the past.
- "Starlight?"
- >You walk into the library, where an extremely nervous-looking Starlight Glimmer was poring over some books.
- >She looks up at you with her eyes as small as pinpricks.
- >"Hi?"
- "Hey, relax. I'm Anonymous. Purplesmart told you about me, remember?"
- >She mouths the word "Purplesmart" then makes an 'oh' of comprehension and gives you a smile.
- >"Oh, I get it, because she's purple and smart, hah. You're funny Mister Anonymous."
- >You grit your teeth.
- >If you have to explain the joke then it becomes less funny.
- >Your urge to strangle her flares up for a moment, but you fight it down.
- >Trixie was much better at this than you were.
- "Listen, I got in touch with Twilight. She told me you were looking to find friends. Well, I'll absolutely be your friend. And I'll introduce you to my friend here as well!"
- >She looks at you somewhat suspiciously.
- >"Just like that?"
- >You give her an innocent look.
- "Duh? I mean, friendship is magic and all that jazz. Besides, I've been in your situation."
- >You sit close to her and put your arm around her.
- >She tries jerking away from you, but you hold her in place.
- "Imagine. Nobody - or should I say nopony - knew who I was. Thought I was some kind of freaky monster. But Twilight showed me a bit of kindness, and long story short, I am now a firm friendship user. Magic. Whatever, you know what I'm trying to say. Hail Celestia."
- >She snorts and giggles.
- >Damn these weird semi-human things, they're pretty kyoot, you're not gonna lie.
- "So come on. I'll introduce you."
- >She closes her books and starts tidying up.
- >Instead you grab her by the hand and drag her over to where Trixie was waiting, by the bleachers.
- "Sup fartnipple."
- >"Easy limpdick."
- >Glimmer gapes at the two of you.
- >You notice and give her a friendly pat on the shoulder.
- "Relax, it's all in good fun."
- >Trixie jumps out of her seat and walks towards you.
- "Anonymous is right. The Great and Powerful Trixie doesn't mean anything by it."
- >She used her real name.
- >That hasn't happened for quite some time.
- >Glimmer looks at Trixie closer and suddenly gasps.
- >G:"Oh my goodness, I am so sorry! I recognize you now! I bumped into you when I exited the portal! I'm so so sorry!"
- >You see Trixie's eye twitch momentarily, but you don't think Glimmer noticed.
- >T:"Oh no, it's quite all right. Happens to the best of us. After all, you couldn't know it was the Great and Powerful Trixie you were -bumping- into, after all."
- >Starlight Glimmer breathes a sight of relief.
- >T:"But I think that now that we're all friends here, we can do a friendly thing AND you can make up for it."
- >G:"What do you mean?"
- "Well, amongst us humans-"
- >You wink in an exaggerated fashion as you continue.
- "-there's a ritual. We're aquatic apes, right? So that's where all the cool kids and friends hang out. At the community pool!"
- >She looks at you quizzically and then claps excitedly.
- >G:"That does sound fun! When are we going to go?"
- >You and Trixie exchange glances.
- >T:"Well, normally cutting school is a serious offense-"
- "-but they make an exception because they obviously know how important the magic of friendship is on this side of the portal too."
- >T:"So we're gonna go now."
- "Just gotta pick you out a bathing suit."
- >Glimmer looks at the two of you in utter confusion.
- >G:"Bathing suit?"
- "Oh shit, right, she doesn't know."
- >T:"You have to understand, one of the BIGGEST social mistakes you can make in human society is to be naked."
- "That is literally THE WORST thing you can do."
- >T:"Like, they will literally drive you out of town and call the nearby towns so that they don't let you in as well."
- "Hell, we had one case like, what - two, three weeks ago? Poor girl was tarred and feathered and got banished. Then, when she finally made it to two towns over? She got put into prison there!"
- >Trixie nods at you and gives you an imperceptable wink.
- >Starlight Glimmer meanwhile looks horrified.
- >G:"Oh goodness. Thank you SO much for telling me!"
- "Nonsense. It's what friends are for."
- >T:"Exactly. Now come on. Let's go. I'll drive."
- >On the way to the pool you stop by the store and buy Glimmer a bathing suit that fits her.
- >Trixie helps size her and in typical male fashion you sit in the store, looking vacantly into space.
- >You had your trunks picked out like, 2 minutes after you walked into the store.
- >They had a picture of Broly on them because his power is maximum.
- >Eventually the girls got out of the dressing room and you all paid for your shit and left.
- >Inside the car, you grabbed Trixie's phone.
- >T:"Hey what the fuck, asshat?!"
- >You ask her via text if the plan is still on, or did the two of them ACTUALLY become friends?
- >Trixie gives a throaty laugh and just nods.
- >She then punches you in the dick and grabs her phone away from you.
- "Oof."
- >Glimmer looks at the two of you.
- >G:"So, if you two are friends, how come the two of you insult and abuse one another?"
- >The two of you exchange glances and look back at her.
- >T:"Well, it's not really abuse, y'know? It's more like playful roughhousing from my end, and impotent insults from him."
- "Ha ha, and I was gonna say that this bitch feebly paws at me, while I trounce her with my superior wit, because she can't take a punch to the jaw."
- >T:"As though you'd dare lay a finger on the Great and Powerful Trixie?"
- >You look her dead in the fucking eye.
- >She seems almost hypnotized.
- >Suddenly, you reach out and grab her by the boob.
- >She shrieks and the car almost swerves into the side of the road.
- >T:"Y-you fucking jerk! Don't do that while I'm driving!"
- "Oh so it's okay otherwise? Good to know."
- >T:"Fuck off, pervert."
- >You grin and snicker evilly.
- >Glimmer looks at the two of you bantering, then sets her jaw, and punches you in the shoulder.
- >G:"You're a whorse, Great and Powerful Trixie."
- >Once again, you and Trixie exchange glances.
- "Er, you're..."
- >T:"Not quite there, Starlight Glimmer."
- "Only when you've been friends for a while with somone."
- >She turns red and looks like she's about to cry.
- >Trixie makes a sharp turn as you approach the community pool.
- >T:"Don't worry about it. Anyway, we're here!"
- >She parks and the lot of you climb out.
- >You immediately start doing some stretches as you wistfully look towards the gym building.
- >You don't go until tomorrow though - you gotta stick with your routine.
- >Skateboard squats and sumo diddlylifts baby!
- >Madcow is a genius.
- >You make your way into the pool and start heading towards the locker rooms.
- >Time to hit the showers.
- >Trixie ushers Glimmer inside, but lingers outside.
- >"All right, you know what to do, right?"
- >You roll your eyes.
- "Yeah, dumbass. Chill. We got this."
- >She nods at you and goes to change.
- >Shrugging, you turn and do the same.
- >Suddenly a familiar face bumps into you.
- >F:"Anonymous! I thought you're not in today?"
- "Sup Flash. Nah, Trixie and I decided to skip last class and go chill at the pool."
- >He gives you a wry grin.
- >F:"Yeah bro, I saw. And some other fine piece of tail. Two at once, Anonymous? Was it her idea?"
- >You punch him in the shoulder.
- "Jealous, faggot? Ever since Shimmer dumped your yellow ass, you've been getting like no game."
- >He puts his hand on his heart.
- >F:"You wound me. Anyway, if you're too much of a pussy to handle the two of them, I'll take them off your hands."
- "See you later bro. I gotta go change."
- >He snorts.
- >F:"Catch you later."
- >You fist bump and you finally get the chance to change and shower.
- >Not really having a permanent place of residence wasn't doing you any favors.
- >Putting on your Broly trunks, you check yourself in the mirror.
- >Could be worse.
- "Could be better too."
- >You shake your head and head to the pool.
- >Obviously the girls weren't here, because any time a woman takes less than 15 minutes to get ready for anything is the day the fucking world ends.
- >You roll your eyes and decide to do a couple of fast-paced laps before they get here.
- >On lap seven, Glimmer and Trixie step out.
- >Holy.
- >Fucking.
- >Shit.
- >You immediately stand to attention.
- >Glimmer was looking kind of awakward and that purple skin didn't do her any favors.
- >But Trixie, oh holy shit.
- >That one-piece on her accented her curves perfectly.
- >Her boobs weren't the biggest but they fit just right on her frame, without a hint of a sag.
- >Her tummy was nice and flat and contrasted very favorably with her hips and booty.
- >And even those weren't exaggerated in a stupid fashion but had the right bumps in all the right places.
- >She painted her nails as she gingerly stepped towards the pool and sat down on the edge.
- >You didn't even realize that she was calling your name.
- >Fuck you fucked up you fucking autist.
- >All right, be cool, you'll talk your way out of this.
- >You swim up to her.
- >She gives you a smirk.
- >T:"Gosh, Anonymous, it seems like you were bedazzled by the Great and Powerful Trixie's radiant beauty?"
- >At that moment she leans over and squishes her boobs together.
- >UNF.
- "Er, well, no. No, I was just amazed at how much like a trashy whore you look like."
- >She covers her mouth as she does an exaggerated fake giggle.
- >T:"Mmm, certainly. Now then, Anon, let's show our new friend a good time?"
- >You nod and wave Glimmer over.
- >She squats down on the edge of the pool.
- >You give a kick of your legs - thanks Rippletits - and grab on to her as you pull her into the water.
- >She shrieks, but calms down almost immediately as she starts bobbing in the water next to you.
- >Trixie slinks into the water as well in one smooth motion, giving a little jerk as her butt bumps the rim of the pool.
- >The three of you swim towards the deep end of the pool and start mucking about with the pool noodles and float boards.
- >Suddenly, Trixie gave your butt a pinch.
- >You nod at her and climb out of the pool, heading back to the locker room.
- "Be right back."
- >You stride purposefully into the locker room, pausing momentarily as a thought crosses your mind.
- >Technically, if you do this, it will make you into Trixie's goon.
- >Meh.
- >Worth it.
- >And when Twiggles accuses you of being a jerk and a bully, you have the perfect defense prepared.
- >Apparently Glimmer used mind control and erased identities and shit.
- >You'll just spin her a tale how this is anathema to humans and its just cultural differences.
- >You stand in front of the janitors closet as another thought crosses your mind.
- >What if you're justifying this now to an imaginary Twilight Sparkle, because you KNOW you're doing something wrong?
- >That you're taking someone who is a metaphorical babe in the woods and going to abuse her trust.
- >You look at the door.
- >That would make you a bit of a jerk.
- >...
- >But, at the same time, it's not like she willingly let those ponies go - she surrendered only after Twilight and the others kicked her flank.
- >So, Twilight may be a forgiving pony.
- >But you're a true human, a vicious and hateful bastard.
- >Fuck her.
- >Metaphorically.
- >An interesting fact that you know about the pool janitor's closet.
- >If you punch the door the right way, the latch just snaps open.
- >You do so and hiss in pain as your hand starts to smart from punching a door.
- >Regardless, you swing it open and grab the screwdriver.
- >Humming a little tune, you walk up to the hair dryer.
- >Looking around to make sure the locker room really is empty, you nod.
- >And then smash the screwdriver with the business end right into the housing of the damn thing.
- >Immediately there is a large spark, as the screwdriver flies out of your hand, and the lights go out.
- >Luckily, you had your eyes closed, so you're not fully blinded.
- >And the emergency exit signs are still glowing.
- >You grab the screwdriver, throw it back into the janitor's closet, and run back out into the pool.
- >Sunlight streams into the windows as you run up to the lifeguard on duty.
- "Dude! The hand dryer just fucking started sparking everywhere!"
- >The guy jumps down from the little tower thingie they have and sprints into the locker room.
- >Trixie and Glimmer swim up to the rim of the pool.
- >You nod at Trixie.
- >She nods back.
- >You throw yourself down to the edge of the pool on your stomach.
- >And grab Starlight Glimmer by the hair and push her under the water.
- >Immediately you hear her muffled screams coming from the bubbles.
- >Trixie dives down underwater as well.
- >You see her swim up to her and grab her bathing suit by the shoulder and armpit and rip it off.
- >It starts to flop around as Glimmer keeps thrashing around.
- >Trixie is merciless as she methodically keeps ripping the suit, until Glimmer is left completely naked.
- >With a final pull, Trixie grabs the remnants of the bathing suit and resurfaces
- >Starlight Glimmer is struggling harder and harder, but you can be hard as well.
- >After all, you're a big strong man, and she's in a weaker body that she isn't accustomed to.
- >Suddenly her struggles become frantic by an order of magnitude.
- >Trixie puts her hand on your arm.
- "No, I know, I know."
- >You release Starlight Glimmer's hair, as a couple of clumps remain in your hand.
- >She comes up for air, gasping loudly, in a manner almost exaggerated, except you're pretty sure she's not faking it.
- >Trixie kneels down next to the gasping teenager and grabs her by the hair.
- >T:"Now listen and listen well to the Great and Powerful Trixie. Bump into me again and I -will- tell Anon to do something worse next time! Hmph!"
- >With that she spits into her face and then gives her a smack.
- >Starlight Glimmer starts sobbing in the middle of her gasping.
- >G:"Ahh-hah-ahh-hah-why-ahh-hah!? I-hah-I-ahh-hah-thought-hah-ahh-we-we-hah-were-ahh-ah-were-"
- >T:"Friends? Don't make the Great and Powerful Trixie laugh, Starlight Glimmer. Who'd be friends with a freak like you?"
- >She stands up and walks to the locker rooms.
- >You do the same.
- >Starlight Glimmer is still there gasping, completely naked, as the emergency lights come on.
- >You change as the repairman is being told something by the lifeguard.
- >The lifeguard waits until you're done changing and asks you if you saw anything funny.
- >You shrug, and then an idea hits you.
- >You repeat the lie about how the thing just started sparking by itself, but that's not the cool thing.
- "The cool thing is that the other girl we were with decided to skinny dip when the lights went out.
- >The repairman and lifeguard look interested in this.
- "I left earlier than them. Maybe you can still catch her."
- >And you give them another rakish wink.
- >The two of them don't look at one another as they both rush towards the door to the pool.
- >Chuckling to yourself, you grab the rest of your stuff, and amble along to Trixie's car.
- >She's already waiting for you, looking smug.
- >The two of you climb in and look at each other.
- >Trixie begins to laugh first.
- >You never noticed even though her laugh sounds arrogant as fuck - like some kind of fancy noblewoman bitch - it's kinda infectious and cute.
- >So you join in.
- >Besides, it was kinda funny.
- >She puts the pedal to the metal and you drive off.
- "I take it we're not waiting for our new bestie?"
- >"Hah! That stuck up horse bitch can prance back to CHS on her own."
- >You snort derisively.
- >"Oh and since the dumb bitch left her clothes in my locker? I took them and threw them in the trash. I'm willing to bet that she's not gonna bother looking."
- "Nice! And I told the lifeguard that she started skinnydipping. So I'm willing to bet that she's getting banned from the pool as we speak."
- >You hold your hand up for a high-five.
- >She looks at you.
- >Then bites her lower lip.
- >And fucking SWERVES into a parking lot of some store.
- "What the fuck?"
- >Instead of responding, she slams on the brakes.
- "Trixie, what the mmphm!?"
- >She fucking pounces at you, locking lips with yours.
- >Oh.
- >Oh god.
- >It was like kissing a cool winter breeze.
- >And holy damn the girl was aggressive with her tonguework, going deep into yours.
- >Not to be outdone, you reciprocate, which just causes her to give a throaty moan, as she digs her nails into your scalp.
- >You put your hands on her waist and pull her closer to you.
- >Instead, she fumbles at her seatbelt and undoes it, breaks the kiss, and plops on your lap.
- >You undo your belt as well, as you pull her in for another passionate kiss.
- >Suddenly you feel Trixie, take her little blue jacket off.
- >Wait, wha-
- >She doesn't let you finish that thought as she grabs your arm and places it back on her breast where you grabbed her earlier.
- >Well, you're not a man to fight fate.
- >You squeeze gently at first, but increase the pressure when you notice that this got her even more excited.
- >Screw this.
- >You move your hand and go under the shirt.
- >Hey.
- >Looks like she didn't bother to put her bra back on.
- >She breaks the kiss and looks at you angrily.
- >"Did the Great and Powerful Trixie give you-"
- "Oh shut up, cockslut and take it."
- >You force the kiss now.
- >She muffles something indignantly but you're still stronger than her.
- >And it appears that she likes it because she stopped struggling almost immediately, as she starts fumbling with your belt buckle.
- >You decide to help her, and so you sort of thrust your hips upwards.
- >She bounces up and while she does so, you yank your pants down in one motion.
- >Breaking the kiss again, she looks at you appreciatively.
- >"Oh my. Is that a magic wand in your boxers? Trixie knows how to handle those."
- >Her hand slips under your waistband.
- >Immediately, Anon Jr. starts throbbing in her hand.
- >Not to be outdone, you let go of her waist and slip your other hand under her dress.
- >She gasps as you touch her panties.
- >"Oh, yesss, Anon," she mutters.
- >You start to gently caress her over the fabric as she twitches slightly in your lap, almost losing her grip on your dick.
- >Almost immediately she goes wet, making your fingers a bit sticky.
- >She starts pumping harder, but you bat her hand away.
- >"What the hell Anonymous, what a-ahh!"
- >You reach with your other hand and pull her panties down.
- >The red blush on her cheeks contrasts very nicely with her general blue appearance.
- >Whatever - she's human enough.
- >She puts her hands on your chest as you pull your dick out.
- >Biting her lip, she looks at it, and slowly rises above you.
- >You grab your dick and hold it steady as she presses her slit over your manhood.
- >Suddenly she lets go and you're inside her.
- >Holy shit.
- >She slowly starts riding you.
- >Not to be outdone you gyrate your hips to get some good penetration going.
- >Considering that she's letting out little whimpers every time yo do that, you're doing something right.
- >She pushes the handle on the chair so that it leans back and you're thrown back.
- >This gives her more space to spread her legs as she begins to pick up the pace of her riding you.
- >You grab her by the neck and squeeze a little.
- >You didn't choose poorly.
- >She lets out a loud moan and digs her nails into your chest again.
- >You reciprocate by reaching over and grabbing two fistfuls of her butt while pressing deeper and deeper into her.
- >She's pratically incoherent, but then again, so are you.
- >But coherent enough to realize that you're about to blow your load.
- >You start to push her off.
- >"F-fuck no, ass!"
- "Trixie I'm gonna come!"
- >Angrily she pushes you back into the chair, but climbs off.
- >Being the good girl she is, she grabs your dick and starts pumping vigorously.
- "Agh, mmm-fuck!"
- >You jerk as she is rewarded with a thick spray of baby batter on her face, chest, and dress.
- >She swallows reflexively.
- >Now, here's where you show dominance.
- >You immediately reach over to her.
- >Trixie tries to bap your hand away but as it was established, you're much stronger than her.
- >And more determined.
- >You break past her defenses and slip your finger inside her.
- >She gasps, loudly.
- >You begin slowly fingering her, making sure to hit her clit periodically.
- >Trixie is almost putty in your hands, but you can see her try to regain your composure.
- >This is as much a power play as it is the two of you going at it.
- >So you deploy your trump card.
- "Remember how miserable she looked? You're a genius, oh Great and Powerful Trixie."
- >You made sure to roll those r's.
- >Trixie's pupils shrink to little pinpricks as she gives a throaty cry of pleasure, as she grabs you by the back of your head and smooshes you into her boobs.
- >She's dripping grool everywhere and you can hear her heart beat through her open mouth.
- >Then she gasps again, jerks in your hands, and then goes limp in your arms.
- >A wicked smile spreads on her face.
- >"Mmm. Well, I showed that bitch who's boss and I finally got to fuck you, Anon. I would say the Great and Powerful Trixie always gets what she wants in the end."
- >She gives a laugh as she slowly licks some of your semen off her face.
- >"Was there every any doubt?"
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