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MetalGearANON

How to ask out a female properly (NN Oneshot)

Sep 4th, 2013
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  1. >You are Norman, and you are currently making your way to the Aryan Beauty's residence.
  2. >Pink found out about your crush on her, despite the measures you took to keep it secret.
  3. >... Okay, maybe stuttering out a string of Rarara whenever you try to say her name doesn't help your case.
  4. >Regardless, Pink decided to throw a couple's type of party, and to help you out, she tasked you with giving Aryan Beauty an invitation.
  5. >The kicker is that you are also to ask her to be your date.
  6. >The plan seemed solid, and if she didn't go for it, you can always say "as friends" and draw the fire away.
  7. >Flawless planning.
  8. >You are approaching the driveway of her rather large abode.
  9. "Well, that's not disheartening."
  10. >It fucking is.
  11. >You advance to the front door of the house, and knock.
  12. >After hearing some fast paced steps down a flight of stairs, the door opens and Aryan Beauty answers.
  13. >"Why hello, dahling. What brings you here?"
  14. >You retrieve the invitation to the party and hold it out for her.
  15. "Pink's throwing a party, and she had me invite you."
  16. >"Oh? Is that so? My, it says it's a rather... intimate sort of gathering. Who might you be taking?"
  17. >Time to nut up, or shut up.
  18. >That was a good movie.
  19. >FOCUS.
  20. >You have to nail this, or you may never get the chance again.
  21. >You feel your breathing increasing in frequency.
  22. >DON'T FUCKING SPAZ OUT.
  23. >JUST ASK HER TO GO WITH YOU.
  24. "Ar-"
  25. >REAL NAME, BUGGER.
  26. "Ra- Rarara."
  27. >She looks at you as if you were a strange being.
  28. >OH GOD, DAMAGE CONTROL.
  29. >Quick! Sing your invitation!
  30. >Sing?!
  31. >Yes, sing! All her friends do it! There has to be something to it!
  32. >I don't know, that sou-
  33. >SING YOU SHIT, SING!
  34. [spoiler]http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=i3fZd5qZje0#t=58[/spoiler]
  35. >No.
  36. >NO.
  37. >NO PLEASE GOD, NOOOOO!
  38. >Do not tell me you just did that.
  39. >YOU DID NOT JUST DEATHGROWL AT FUCKING ARYAN BEAUTY.
  40. >You fucking MORON.
  41. >There isn't a chance for you now.
  42. >She is just going to slam the door, and try to forget she knows you.
  43. >IDIOT.
  44. >You better pray she even THINKS about speaking to you ever again.
  45. >Why the fuck would you fuck up like that?
  46. >There isn't a shot that you, the goddamn racist, will ever find a girlfriend.
  47. >The one girl who showed such kindness to you.
  48. >The first of Purple's friends to talk to you as a great friend.
  49. >You blew it.
  50. >It's over.
  51. >Just go home.
  52. >There isn't a reason to wake up anymore.
  53. >Rot in bed.
  54. >The tears pooling at the edges of your eyes threaten to slide down your face.
  55. >If you dislike yourself this much, think about how much she must hate you.
  56. >Taking one last crestfallen look at her, you see her slacked jaw and wide eyes.
  57. >That is not a good sign for the future.
  58. >You dun goofed.
  59. >Your goof is the goof of the year for all years.
  60. >There is no hope.
  61. >You hang your head in shame and turn to walk away.
  62. >Before you slink off, you feel a grip wrap around your chest and impede your walk of shame.
  63. >"Oh Norman! Such a passionate invitation could never be refused!"
  64. >Wat.
  65. >"When can you pick me up? I'll start getting ready now."
  66. >Wat.
  67. >You notice her eager expression.
  68. >You better fucking respond.
  69. >Do not fuck this up again!
  70. "Uh, I, uh... seven?"
  71. >She gives a squeal and a squeeze and rushes back into the house.
  72. >What just happened.
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