I long to hold you, to feel your skin against mine, to run my fingers over your back as you lay on my breast. I long to be next to you - the place where I feel safe and content.

I know that there are some things I can't give you and we may never truly be together. My heart aches when I think that the challenges of untangling our lives might be what stops us.

How can two such successful people be afraid to tackle this challenge when we see what's on the other side of it? Why not accept the challenge when we know it could lead to a more fulfilling life?

I know the answers to these questions. I know that just the idea of dividing up the Christmas ornaments can feel overwhelming. I know that the fear of the unknowns that come with a new life often feel scarier than staying in the life we are in.

Maybe it's all too much for us and we will go back to our lives and make the best of things. Perhaps we should focus on being grateful for what we have. After all, our lives would certainly be appealing to many people. Maybe there is happiness to be found there.

But I don't know how to truly move on. To forget what we have. To pretend I don't need the connection and chemistry. To get rid of the longing. They say time heals all wounds. I really hope this is true.

I want you to know I understand that the forest might just be too scary and unappealing. I know you love me; I have never doubted that. I wanted so badly to be your teammate in life but I understand if it turns out to be just too hard.

Whether we end up together or not, I will always be thankful for what you have given me. You truly have been a gift and you'll always be my knight.

I love you.