Subaru's Confession LN Vol 7

“Rem! Rem, open your eyes…!”
Subaru lifted the girl in his arms, his face pale as he desperately called out to her.
The land dragon came right up to them, nuzzling them with its black nose in an act of concern. But at that moment, Subaru harbored a sense of nervousness so great that he did not respond to even that land dragon’s consideration.
—Subaru’s plan to make the White Whale chase his scent and crush it under the Great Tree was a splendid success.
Some had raised their voices in objection, reluctant to cut down a historical tree. But the beast-man mercenaries were rationalists with no such compunctions, and when even Crusch deemed it necessary, opinion easily shifted to his favor.
Accordingly, Subaru, drafter of the plan, saw the operation through, shouldering no small risk in the process, resulting in achievement in battle that one might call second to none.
But if this was the price he had to pay, it was the smallest of small comforts.
“This…is no good… Please, Rem…if…you’re not here…!”
Before his eyes, Rem calmly rested with her eyes closed, completely unresponsive to Subaru’s voice.
There was no sign that conscious will was conveyed to her limp limbs, and the tearful voice calling her name seemed to pass right through her ears, a cry into empty space.
—Under ferocious pursuit by the White Whale, they’d raced as the falling trunk of the Great Tree loomed near.
The heavy weight of the Great Tree struck the demon beast squarely, with a loud crash to earth and a shock wave that flew indiscriminately throughout the area—and amid it was the sight of Subaru and Rem, running right alongside.
They were engulfed by the shock wave, losing track of which way was up, and Subaru recalled that he was protected by a warm sensation during that. The instant he grasped that feeling, there was a roaring sound from an incredible impact as he, and the sensation, were slammed onto the ground.
Slipping through the gaps of Subaru’s vague consciousness was the realization that he was lying on the ground. And lifting his head, he realized who had embraced him—and that it was her body that had embraced his to the very end.
“…Suba…ru…”
“Rem—?!”
With a twitch, her eyelids shuddered, and Subaru was reflected in the dim gleam beneath them.
Reflected in her eyes, he looked so very weak, almost as if he was subconsciously recognizing the reality of what was unfolding before his eyes, when he said, “I’m so g… Yeah, it’s me. You know, Subaru. Rem, your body…”
“Subaru…I’m so glad…you are safe…”
His throat choked up. For Rem, seeing Subaru unable to even get out the tearful words of concern for her the way he wanted, was smiling at him in visible relief—as if taking no heed of her own injuries, happy so long as Subaru was safe.
“What happened to…the demon beast…?”
“…It went down. We nailed it. It worked out. Everything worked out! I’m…not hurt, either… It’s all…thanks to you…”
“Is that…so? Then, Master Roswaal and… Lady Emilia…shall…surely be all right…”
“It’ll work out. Leave it to me. So, Rem, you don’t have to say anything right now, just rest… No, don’t…close your eyes… Aw, crap, what should I do…?”
She didn’t need to force herself to speak. But if Rem spoke no words, he couldn’t wipe away his own unease. Subaru was nervous, almost as if the relentless coercive power of Fate might yet snatch her life from his hand.
He didn’t know what he ought to do. He didn’t know what was best to do.
Not knowing what to do, Subaru couldn’t help holding her hand and embracing her with his other arm as strongly as he could.
“That…hurts, Subaru…”
“Sorry, my bad. But if I don’t do this, you’ll go off somewh…”
“I shall not go…anywhere… I shall be at…your side, Subaru…”
Rem gave Subaru a little smile, like that of a mother consoling an unreasonable child in tears, when strength suddenly left her body.
Subaru’s throat froze in fear as he felt her body go soft in his arms.
Inside his ears, he heard the sound of blood draining, of anything and everything leaving him behind.
“Rem…? Rem! Please, Rem…open…your eyes…”
“Somehow, I’m very…sleepy… I’m sorry. Let me sleep just a little, and when I wake…soon, for your sake, I shall be…”
“Never mind all that! You don’t need to do anything. It’s fine if you’re just together with me…so please, Rem…!”
Even though she was right within his arms, Subaru wrung out his voice, desperately trying to hold fast to her as she began gradually slipping away. And yet, though Rem was right before his eyes, his voice did not reach.
“May I say something…selfish?”
“…! Say it, say anything! I’ll listen to anything, I’ll do anything, so…!”
In a broken voice, in a frail tone, Rem looked up at Subaru and made a little murmur.
“I want you to say…that you…love me.”
Tears welling up forced Subaru’s eyes open as he shook his head side to side. Then, he drew his face close to hers and told her:
“I love you.”
“……”
“I really love you. Of course I do… I can’t…manage without you.”
They were words from his heart of hearts.
Subaru poured all his unembellished true feelings into the words he spoke that instant.
He couldn’t have made it that far without her. He couldn’t live without her.
“Ah…I’m so happy…”
Receiving Subaru’s confession, tears came out through her closed eyes.
Rem’s cheeks suddenly reddened as she happily accepted the words tossed toward her. With that, Subaru felt that the last of her strength had truly left her.
“Wait…”
“I love you, Subaru.”
“Don’t kid around—stay with me! Am I gonna have…nothing but regrets again?!”
He could not bear a future that did not have her in it.
He understood that well before, and now, her existence loomed far, far larger. That was why…
“I don’t wanna…laugh and talk about the future without you…!”
“In that future, can I be by your side?”
“…Of course. I won’t let you be anywhere else.”
Closing his eyes, Subaru wiped away the rising tears before staring straight at Rem.
And then, he stated firmly, “You’re mine. I won’t…hand you to anyone.”
“—I shall take that…as a commitment.”
“Huh?”
Abruptly, Subaru let out his voice like an idiot at the highly intellectual reply.
As he did so, Rem slowly opened the eyes she had kept closed all that time, proceeding to sit up inside his arms. Then, with Subaru dumbfounded, unable to grasp the situation, she tilted her head and smiled at him.
“You have promised I shall be at your side, Subaru… You cannot take it back now.”
Where had the sight of her dying gone…?
In a teasing, toying way, Rem closed one eye and gently touched Subaru’s lips.
Crestfallen, Subaru’s strength gave out from his shoulders down as he sank to the ground.
“Why you…you, you…youuuu!”
“Yes, I am Subaru’s Rem. In name and fact.”
Hearing her trademark reply, now even more brazen, Subaru could not follow up his words.
Even so, even if by rights it was a scene where he ought to be shaking with anger, the fact that the girl before his eyes was safe took precedence, leaving him too happy to do so.
“We’ve both aired our true feelings, so that’s really overkill…”
“Girls are strong when they become honest about love, Subaru.”
Subaru was flustered by how Rem no longer had any intention of hiding her love for him. More embarrassed than anything else, Subaru’s face reddened as he let out a small breath and confessed, “…If you’d died, I was about to die, too.”
“I am a lucky woman that you think so much of me.”
“I’m not kidding, either.”
Rem replied with a little smile, but Subaru had answered with his true and sincere feelings.
If Subaru had lost Rem, he would have most certainly attempted to do it all over again. Even if the chance to do things over was not granted to him, there was no doubt he’d have tried anyway.
That was how large a place Rem’s existence now occupied in Subaru’s heart.
“I absolutely must not die, then.”
“Darn right. I won’t let you die, even if it kills me.”
Subaru drew his face to hers, and their foreheads touched as they looked at each other from so very close.
Rem gazed adoringly at Subaru’s gesture, and it was hard for Subaru to just stay there with her close enough that their breaths touched. Naturally, his gaze was drawn in by her pink lips, and he felt his heart beat just a little faster—
“—Could you two wrap it up already, meow?”
Ferris, looking exasperated from having watched from a distance as the two flirted, butted in to break things up at the most important juncture. Apparently, he’d been watching the whole time.
Subaru was sure he’d done it on purpose.