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- [5/25/2015 1:00:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: ..........so i wanna do something stupid
- [5/25/2015 1:00:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: are you ready
- [5/25/2015 1:00:11 PM] Flareth Sexbang: go on?
- [5/25/2015 1:00:13 PM] Zora Sexbang: for another infamous
- [5/25/2015 1:00:15 PM] Zora Sexbang: liveblog
- [5/25/2015 1:00:25 PM] Flareth Sexbang: HOLY HELL I'M READY
- [5/25/2015 1:00:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: today we will be taking a trip way back
- [5/25/2015 1:00:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: before the spinoff
- [5/25/2015 1:00:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: before 3
- [5/25/2015 1:00:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: before 2
- [5/25/2015 1:00:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: TO ONE
- [5/25/2015 1:01:01 PM] Zora Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 1:01:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: just lemme find the thread
- [5/25/2015 1:01:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: here we go
- [5/25/2015 1:01:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: good
- [5/25/2015 1:02:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: Here is the story: Jax (me)creates a shrinking ray. While testing it out, it accidently zaps Jax and her friends (you guys). Jax pulls you into a mousehole. They don't know that the mousehole is a entrance to BlahBlahland. BlahBlahland is a place very weirder than our world. Burgers are people, a lot of things that exist here, are replaced by weird copies there
- the beginning
- [5/25/2015 1:02:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: of a legacy
- [5/25/2015 1:02:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: your legacy
- [5/25/2015 1:02:52 PM] Flareth Sexbang: my legacy
- [5/25/2015 1:03:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: you must be so proud
- [5/25/2015 1:03:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...I forgot FlameGurl was in this
- [5/25/2015 1:03:49 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ye
- [5/25/2015 1:03:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: She literally just played a Harry Potter character tho
- [5/25/2015 1:03:54 PM] Flareth Sexbang: YES
- [5/25/2015 1:03:56 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i know
- [5/25/2015 1:04:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: Let's take a look at these ancient profiles
- [5/25/2015 1:04:24 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ye
- [5/25/2015 1:04:50 PM] Zora Sexbang: Name:Jax
- age:13
- looks:Brown hair pulled into a ponytail, a black lab coat and jeans.
- personality:smart,sarcastic, but nice. Crazy too
- Name: Esaul
- Age: 13
- Looks: Spiked black hair, leather biker jacket with white undershirt,Black jeans
- Personality: Nice, but can get very dangerous when he gets mad, and makes friends easily.
- Name: Zora
- Age: 15
- Looks: LOOOOONG red hair, not bright red, but almost brown, and green eyes. Tall.
- Personality: Usually NOSOCIAL. She's kind when one takes the time to get to know her, but can often hurt feelings, and faces, when one gets too close.
- Name: Zed
- Age: 17
- Looks: Short black hair, red and green striped shirt, black pants and white tennis shoes. With brown eyes.
- Personality: Zed is very calm and quiet, also VERY slightly childish.
- [5/25/2015 1:04:54 PM] Zora Sexbang: ah, how things change
- [5/25/2015 1:05:19 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 1:05:36 PM] Flareth Sexbang: remembers that zed was 17
- [5/25/2015 1:06:00 PM] Flareth Sexbang: it's awkward because jax and zed could have gone cutely together but reminded now of the age GAP
- [5/25/2015 1:06:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: An age gap that later closed a lil bit tbf
- [5/25/2015 1:06:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ye
- [5/25/2015 1:06:50 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Finally, it's done." Jax said, "I gotta call...my friends?"
- ...with a question mark?
- [5/25/2015 1:07:02 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yeah
- [5/25/2015 1:07:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: with a question mark
- [5/25/2015 1:07:13 PM] Zora Sexbang: and one cousin i guess
- [5/25/2015 1:07:55 PM] Flareth Sexbang: she wasn't sure if she had friends, and in the case of me originally wanting it to be a dream, this was the first slight realization that something wasn't right poor girl
- [5/25/2015 1:08:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: Well, we know she solid now
- [5/25/2015 1:08:29 PM] Flareth Sexbang: hey zora log onto fr for a second
- [5/25/2015 1:08:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i have a dragon friend for you
- [5/25/2015 1:08:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: o:
- [5/25/2015 1:09:13 PM] Flareth Sexbang: sent
- [5/25/2015 1:09:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: i love you
- [5/25/2015 1:09:33 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i love me too
- [5/25/2015 1:09:46 PM] Flareth Sexbang: it had to be a skydancer you don't understand
- [5/25/2015 1:09:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: milton is a skydancer
- [5/25/2015 1:10:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 1:10:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but now back to the show
- [5/25/2015 1:10:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 1:10:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I made a shrink ray out of smelded jewelry." Jax said, "Now let's fire up this baby!"
- Jax was going to shrink a sock, but didn't notice it was pointed at them.
- "her we go." Jax said, pushing the button, "WHAAAAAA?'
- [5/25/2015 1:10:50 PM] Zora Sexbang: tiamat shrieking in the background
- [5/25/2015 1:10:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: "SQUARE CUBE LAAAAAW"
- [5/25/2015 1:11:14 PM] Flareth Sexbang: well we did send her to bbl we really need to finish that
- [5/25/2015 1:11:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: we do
- [5/25/2015 1:11:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: maybe once i get to a good point on this liveblog
- [5/25/2015 1:11:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: ye
- [5/25/2015 1:11:40 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ye
- [5/25/2015 1:12:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Well that is true." Jax said, freaking out about her new size., "Let's go into that mousehole, kind sirs."
- Zorana: I am not a sir.
- [5/25/2015 1:12:21 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ....I know :D
- [5/25/2015 1:12:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I'm not a sir!" Zora said angrily, "I hate people..."
- oh
- [5/25/2015 1:12:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yep
- [5/25/2015 1:13:08 PM] Flareth Sexbang: uh zora
- [5/25/2015 1:13:14 PM] Flareth Sexbang: milton's lookup
- [5/25/2015 1:13:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: "i'm joking Zora." Jax said, "Come in, or else Pokemoprhs will eat our flesh."
- *hides pokemorph rp under the vending machine*
- [5/25/2015 1:13:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: ..>?
- [5/25/2015 1:13:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: http://flightrising.com/main.php?p=view&tab=dragon&id=26006&did=13423509
- [5/25/2015 1:13:40 PM] Flareth Sexbang: hatchie stuff?
- [5/25/2015 1:13:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...Is it a resell from a hatchery?
- [5/25/2015 1:13:55 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ....maybe?????
- [5/25/2015 1:14:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: Someone decided they didnt want them, or the hatchery just puts that on all their hatchlings
- [5/25/2015 1:14:23 PM] Flareth Sexbang: hm
- [5/25/2015 1:14:25 PM] Zora Sexbang: I'll replace it with a proper Miltonism later
- [5/25/2015 1:14:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ok
- [5/25/2015 1:14:58 PM | Edited 1:15:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: back to the show
- [5/25/2015 1:15:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zed started walking, while he was ducked, into the hole. In the other side of the hole, he saw walking burgers, and hotdogs sitting on a bed, with wings, while another hotdog was piloting the bed. "Whoa... amazing-ly weird, I suggest we explore this place.".
- it was /zed/ who actually went first
- [5/25/2015 1:15:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: huh
- [5/25/2015 1:15:29 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 1:15:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I don't know, but there IS a paper leaf here, and a pencil, what about drawing something to pilot it?" Said Zed, looking at the mentioned objects. "Even if my idea is wrong, the bed is still comfy, so I may snooze here a while!".
- the legacy
- [5/25/2015 1:16:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 1:16:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Where do you want to go?" Jax said, "I bet this could go to the Shrek world that I'm obssessed with."
- hmmmm
- [5/25/2015 1:16:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: HMMMMMMMMMMM
- [5/25/2015 1:16:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
- [5/25/2015 1:16:53 PM] Flareth Sexbang: hides under vending machine
- [5/25/2015 1:17:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zed had a grin on his face, and grabbing his pencil, and the paper leaf, he drawn a Shedinja, but didn't color it.
- Soon the drawn Shedinja appeared in front of the group, not colored. And in a blink of eyes, the Pokemon drawing floated to somewhere unknown.
- "Float, float! And be free, little drawing!"
- [5/25/2015 1:17:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: ah yes
- [5/25/2015 1:17:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: the shedinja
- [5/25/2015 1:17:49 PM] Flareth Sexbang: awwww
- [5/25/2015 1:18:00 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Yes, amazing." Said Zed, with his eyes closed, but pointing to the auto pilot. He opened his eyes and said "As old grandpa Zed always said: the center of the town is the root of all happenings."
- grandpa zed
- [5/25/2015 1:18:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: zed comes from a long line of zeds
- [5/25/2015 1:18:40 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes PERFECT
- [5/25/2015 1:18:54 PM] Zora Sexbang: this of course means that whoever he nailed in the spinoff
- [5/25/2015 1:18:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: the mom named henry
- [5/25/2015 1:19:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zed smiled. He had been waiting to finally discover the source of all the weird happenings. When suddenly a storm came, and the loud sound of the thunders had been replaced with the sweet meowing of a cat. "I suppose it's going to rain." said "But what will rain, squeaking pants?"
- [5/25/2015 1:19:36 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 1:19:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: o b s e r v e t h e s q u e a k i n g
- [5/25/2015 1:20:02 PM] Flareth Sexbang: Y E S YE S
- [5/25/2015 1:20:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Her name is Princess Sha-nay-nay!" she exclaimed, not at all minding the falling donkeys all around her.
- you bet it is flamegurl
- [5/25/2015 1:20:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 1:21:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: "These...raining donkeys are freaking me out. Can we go somewhere else?" Esaul exclaimed as another donkey crashed into the shield. "Plus I don't wanna hurt these guys with the shield, it looks painful."
- ...i have a few things to say about this
- [5/25/2015 1:21:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: 1. he's not wrong
- [5/25/2015 1:21:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: 2. what the /fuck/ does he care about hurting things after the fire's wisdom drama
- [5/25/2015 1:22:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ....oh rhythm
- [5/25/2015 1:22:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: She had Sha-nay-nay fly alongside it (I Don't get it either. you SAID it was random.)
- there goes that 4th wall again
- [5/25/2015 1:23:20 PM] Flareth Sexbang: the fourth wall is decimated
- [5/25/2015 1:23:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora=-.O
- "I have gone comPLETEly insane." Zora said.
- yes
- [5/25/2015 1:23:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: yes you have
- [5/25/2015 1:23:56 PM] Flareth Sexbang: we all have
- [5/25/2015 1:24:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Yeah!" Said.
- So Zed drew a cloud and a few pants raining from it, with the word "Squeak" written in them.
- So the clouds multiplied, joined with the donkey clouds, and squeaking pants started raining, instead of donkeys.
- "YES!" Exclaimed Zed. "Finally squeaky pants rained!"
- He then proceeds to grab some.
- "Anyone wants?" He asked.
- [5/25/2015 1:24:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: everyone wants
- [5/25/2015 1:24:30 PM] Flareth Sexbang: we want it all
- [5/25/2015 1:25:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: "No!!" the burger person cried, "I'm Bobbinutyh and I am poisonous!"
- hello friend
- [5/25/2015 1:25:36 PM] Flareth Sexbang: hello burger darling
- [5/25/2015 1:26:01 PM] Zora Sexbang: being NOSOCIAL like she is.
- zorana's emo phase
- [5/25/2015 1:26:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 1:26:40 PM] Flareth Sexbang: zorana's zexion phase
- [5/25/2015 1:26:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: omfg
- [5/25/2015 1:27:24 PM] Zora Sexbang:
- "This is BlahBlahLand, located in scenic mousehole. The currency is Gunpohs." Bobbinutyh said.
- "Blah...Blahland." Jax mumbled.
- [5/25/2015 1:27:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: me too jax
- [5/25/2015 1:27:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: me too
- [5/25/2015 1:28:11 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Now gimme that pencil." Zora said, drawing something that looked like armor onto herself.
- apparently zorana just went around in a suit of armor for the first 10 pages of the rp
- [5/25/2015 1:28:33 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh my god
- [5/25/2015 1:28:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Lemme have that pencil later." Jax said, "And Zed, it's pronounced Bob-in-u-though."
- thank u jax
- [5/25/2015 1:29:01 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 1:29:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: she spoke a lot of sense back then for someone who later made proclamations about
- [5/25/2015 1:29:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: the seven
- [5/25/2015 1:29:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: cellular phones
- [5/25/2015 1:29:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: GODDAMNIIT
- [5/25/2015 1:29:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax hid behind a bush that sprouted bandages. She drew a green dress onto herself and made fancy but comfy shoes.
- only clothes?
- [5/25/2015 1:29:59 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ye
- [5/25/2015 1:30:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Desu Desu." Jax said, "Deidara."
- ...never mind about the sense thing
- [5/25/2015 1:30:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: jax u fuckin weeb
- [5/25/2015 1:30:15 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh my god
- [5/25/2015 1:30:45 PM] Zora Sexbang: She was convinced that the big men with white suits would be coming to take her away to a padded room sometime soon.
- plot twist: in the future you are the one in the white lab coat
- [5/25/2015 1:30:50 PM] Zora Sexbang: for a different reason
- [5/25/2015 1:30:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: but still
- [5/25/2015 1:31:04 PM] Flareth Sexbang: perfect
- [5/25/2015 1:31:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Whatever, laws were made to be broken." So Zed entered the school only to see a line of cars.
- zed is a rebel
- [5/25/2015 1:31:50 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes he is
- [5/25/2015 1:32:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Well isn't that great." Esaul said. "You wrecked a car that isn't ours. Hopefully that car has Geico."
- ---
- "Or Escod." A Yonbuy,a dog shaped like a Togepi, said, "Geico is a food dish."
- o...okay
- [5/25/2015 1:32:41 PM] Flareth Sexbang: well things are different there
- [5/25/2015 1:33:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I can." Jax said, "We first take a left at that Fire Flower, then a right at the mouse."
- that... makes too much sense for a pocket dimension in a mousehole
- [5/25/2015 1:33:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 1:33:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Yeah, EVERYONE is talking loud! Anyway, let's check about books" Said Zed, while heading to the library worker pizza."
- Zed started to talk.
- "Hi, me and my friends are looking for a book with the history from this place." Said.
- The worker pizza replied:
- "History of BlahBlahLand, hm? That one is in cheese four, to the left." Said the pizza.
- Zed turned to his friends and said.
- "The book is in cheese four, it's to the left."
- [5/25/2015 1:33:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: ah yes
- [5/25/2015 1:33:54 PM] Zora Sexbang: cheese four
- [5/25/2015 1:34:04 PM] Flareth Sexbang: to the left
- [5/25/2015 1:34:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I'll stand, if i sit too close I'll probably take a bite outta it." Esaul said.
- rhy feels me
- [5/25/2015 1:35:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax started to read.
- BlahBlahLand was founded in 1337 BC when a caveman ate some rotten cherries and he was put into a reality that does exist. He was trippin off acid. Then he went WTH and went to the world of the great blue bunny, got sick, and had chunky spit. The Caveman was then forever know as Shrek. xD OMG LOL WTH DOG POO
- "What ze heck?" Jax said.
- [5/25/2015 1:35:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: the legend
- [5/25/2015 1:35:19 PM] Flareth Sexbang: the legacy
- [5/25/2015 1:35:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: "..." Esaul's expression (O_o) was enough to replace words.
- me too
- [5/25/2015 1:35:57 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Oy, vey. Why do I hang out with you people?" Zora said.
- ........
- [5/25/2015 1:35:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: zorana
- [5/25/2015 1:35:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: honey
- [5/25/2015 1:36:01 PM] Zora Sexbang: you're not
- [5/25/2015 1:36:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: an old jew
- [5/25/2015 1:36:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: stop that
- [5/25/2015 1:36:19 PM] Flareth Sexbang: you are not dan
- [5/25/2015 1:37:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: Orange Soup
- Ingredients:
- Orange
- Any soup
- Preparation:
- Get a huge bowl of soup and throw a giant orange to the bowl, then swim in it for 30 seconds and done...
- DELICIOUS
- [5/25/2015 1:38:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: (Sorry guys, my parents are making me put blond hilights in my hair, won't be around much)
- ....why did you need to tell us tho?
- [5/25/2015 1:38:16 PM] Flareth Sexbang: swim in it
- [5/25/2015 1:38:23 PM] Flareth Sexbang: because you post like mad
- [5/25/2015 1:40:22 PM] Flareth Sexbang: well
- [5/25/2015 1:40:22 PM] Flareth Sexbang: posted
- [5/25/2015 1:40:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: yay
- [5/25/2015 1:40:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh
- [5/25/2015 1:40:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: wait
- [5/25/2015 1:40:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: ohhh
- [5/25/2015 1:40:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: oops
- [5/25/2015 1:41:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax jumped into the covered wagon, that had a DVD player.
- "Nice! It's playing Shrek." Jax said.
- of COURSE it is
- [5/25/2015 1:41:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Left goes to Macaroni Duck Plains, right goes to Random Place Of TV Quotes. Where we go?"Asked Zed.
- we have still never been to macaroni duck plains
- [5/25/2015 1:42:07 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I have a gopher in my pants and his name is Carlos." jax said.
- o-okay
- [5/25/2015 1:42:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: that's a quote from something
- [5/25/2015 1:42:29 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i forget what
- [5/25/2015 1:43:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: "The logical place, Zed." Jax said, "Go!"
- The dragon started to fly. Over sunflowers, onions, and Duloc they flew.
- "The forest!" Jax yelled, "Turn!"
- The dragon turned.
- i can just /hear/ the song
- [5/25/2015 1:44:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: hello shedinja
- [5/25/2015 1:44:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Uungh? Where's Jax? Zed draws another dragon, with the "word" "7341" written on it, the dragon was teal with red numbers.
- teal and red
- [5/25/2015 1:44:33 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 1:44:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: teal
- [5/25/2015 1:44:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: and red
- [5/25/2015 1:44:41 PM] Flareth Sexbang: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c9d4YkR8kyw
- [5/25/2015 1:44:45 PM] Zora Sexbang: its a dragon
- [5/25/2015 1:44:51 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ye
- [5/25/2015 1:44:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: with the numbers 4, 1 and 3
- [5/25/2015 1:45:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: and libra is the 7th zodiac sign
- [5/25/2015 1:45:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: conclusion: that dragon is terezi pyrope
- [5/25/2015 1:45:22 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 1:45:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul flew in sight of Zed and Jax. He was flying with some weird demonic wings he had found in the quote house.
- ...
- [5/25/2015 1:46:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: [3/19/2014 9:55:35 PM] Zora Smith: *Zor is in a pile of quotes from various shows... she pulls up some kind of leathery thing* Is this... a pair of wings?
- [3/19/2014 9:56:04 PM] Flareth: Cameron: Those....sure do look like wings.
- [3/19/2014 9:57:47 PM] Zora Smith: Zor: ...I am almost afraid of what would happen if I tossed these on... however that would work. I mean we know what happened to the last guy with wings.
- [3/19/2014 9:58:11 PM] Flareth: Cameron: yeaaaaah let's just leave them here
- [3/19/2014 9:59:05 PM] Zora Smith: Zor: Yeah nope. Nope nope nope.
- [3/19/2014 9:59:57 PM] Zora Smith: *she drops them again*
- [5/25/2015 1:48:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: (why i had this on hand, i do not know)
- [5/25/2015 1:48:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: (but you know.)
- [5/25/2015 1:48:14 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes perfect
- [5/25/2015 1:48:29 PM] Zora Sexbang: i don't even remember what hers were going to be
- [5/25/2015 1:48:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: most likely bat or dragon wings
- [5/25/2015 1:48:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ye
- [5/25/2015 1:50:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul sped up, now accustomed to his new wings. Suddenly the wings turned into black feathered angelic wings. Shocked by the sudden change, Esaul plummeted to the ground, wings flapping madly.
- also this probably wouldnt have happened
- [5/25/2015 1:50:36 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 1:51:29 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax grabbed ahold of Esaul as she descended.
- [5/25/2015 1:51:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: as she descended.
- [5/25/2015 1:51:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: she
- [5/25/2015 1:51:39 PM] Zora Sexbang: s h e
- [5/25/2015 1:51:50 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i fucked up
- [5/25/2015 1:52:02 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ...oh wait
- [5/25/2015 1:52:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: on the dragon zora
- [5/25/2015 1:52:08 PM] Flareth Sexbang: on the dragon
- [5/25/2015 1:52:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: ?
- [5/25/2015 1:52:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: descends on the dragon to pick esaul up?
- [5/25/2015 1:52:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: it doesnt say
- [5/25/2015 1:53:00 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh
- [5/25/2015 1:53:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: All this happened because of a shrinking ray, a thing which Esaul would have never believed to be real.
- tiamat mourning the square cube law in the background
- [5/25/2015 1:53:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes rest in pizza
- [5/25/2015 1:54:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul jumped high, trying to test his wings, but as soon as he jumped, the wings changed again. He fell flat on his face.
- maybe don't jump then
- [5/25/2015 1:54:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Finally, I was tired of dragon riding."
- Zor: BLASPHEMER
- [5/25/2015 1:54:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: zor go home you belong in dragon fuckers anonymous anyway
- [5/25/2015 1:55:07 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zor: NO
- [5/25/2015 1:55:16 PM] Flareth Sexbang: fuck
- [5/25/2015 1:55:53 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Thanks!" Zed drew an Mp3 with an afro symbol, turned it on, and started hearing music. "Much better..." Said with his eyes closed.
- of course
- [5/25/2015 1:56:00 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 1:56:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Hey, who are those guys?" Shrek asked. They had spotted a few people and what seemed to be a dragon."They're in our territory!" Shrek was visibly getting angry. "Now now Shrek, Don't get so hasty!" Donkey replied. Thankfully Shrek calmed down. "You're right, Donkey , for the first time that I've been with you. Besides, they look like young'uns. How 'dya think they got in here?" Donkey shrugged and replied "Let's go see them, maybe they got food!" They walked toward the gang.
- *ahem*
- [5/25/2015 1:56:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: *aaaaaahem*
- [5/25/2015 1:56:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: some
- [5/25/2015 1:56:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: BODY ONCE TOLD ME
- [5/25/2015 1:56:50 PM] Zora Sexbang: THE WORLD WAS GONNA ROLL ME
- [5/25/2015 1:56:51 PM] Flareth Sexbang: THE WORLD WAS GONNA ROLL ME
- [5/25/2015 1:56:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: I AINT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED
- [5/25/2015 1:56:57 PM] Flareth Sexbang: I AIN'T THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED
- [5/25/2015 1:57:01 PM] Flareth Sexbang: RIIIING
- [5/25/2015 1:57:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: bless
- [5/25/2015 1:58:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Hey, someone is approaching..." Said Zed "We better be careful. Now let me get rid of my Mp3."
- Zed draws a bubble with the Mp3 in it, it slowly floats to the skies, then disappears.
- 8 years later this bubble pops and hits zor in the head while she's flying around on tempest
- [5/25/2015 1:58:35 PM] Flareth Sexbang: FUCK
- [5/25/2015 1:59:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: "W-Wow." Jax said, "It's...really..such an...oh no!"
- Jax felt her butt bubble a bit. Soon, Jax let out a noxious fart.
- ...
- [5/25/2015 1:59:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: NERVOUS FARTS DEAR
- [5/25/2015 1:59:26 PM] Zora Sexbang: *hands jax some beano*
- [5/25/2015 2:00:00 PM] Flareth Sexbang: fuck
- [5/25/2015 2:00:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: JaxL takes the beano and hides under vending machine
- [5/25/2015 2:00:35 PM] Zora Sexbang: nobody comments on this either
- [5/25/2015 2:00:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: she drops a nuclear fart and no one cares
- [5/25/2015 2:00:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ....it's fucking normal i bet
- [5/25/2015 2:01:05 PM] Flareth Sexbang: or was during that time
- [5/25/2015 2:01:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: like "fuck, jax is farting again"
- [5/25/2015 2:01:26 PM] Zora Sexbang: omg
- [5/25/2015 2:01:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: (I stopped playing Shrek, because I going to leave the computer for a while and I don't want 20 pages or so filling up with no word from Esaul)
- no u didnt
- [5/25/2015 2:02:02 PM] Flareth Sexbang: omg
- [5/25/2015 2:02:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: "How bizzare...Not unlike everything else here. Did I do LSD or something before this happened?" Zora asked.
- yes zorana
- [5/25/2015 2:02:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: the acid is kicking in
- [5/25/2015 2:02:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes it is
- [5/25/2015 2:03:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Mmm...Shrek sounded like he could take it. But we could supervise them by air." Esaul said. His wings sprouted suddenly. "Godd*mn! That always hurts." Esaul said, clutching his back.
- ...actually good to note
- [5/25/2015 2:03:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 2:04:39 PM] Zora Sexbang: zor takes the dragon wings and screeches every time they come out for like a week till she gets used to them
- [5/25/2015 2:04:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: fuck
- [5/25/2015 2:04:50 PM] Flareth Sexbang: that hurts
- [5/25/2015 2:05:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: eventually it'd probably stop hurting to be fair
- [5/25/2015 2:05:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: but the shock of that being there at first
- [5/25/2015 2:34:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Wait a minute..." Zora thought about something, grabbed a pencil, and doodled herself a pair of wings.
- bad idea dear
- [5/25/2015 2:34:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: back
- [5/25/2015 2:34:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: we remember
- [5/25/2015 2:34:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: what happened
- [5/25/2015 2:34:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: to the last guy with wings
- [5/25/2015 2:35:01 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh dear
- [5/25/2015 2:35:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: yes rhy they do look flimsy
- [5/25/2015 2:36:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: He flew straight up and suddenly spotted a traphole, big enough for an ogre and a donkey.
- ...there are
- [5/25/2015 2:36:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: so many things
- [5/25/2015 2:36:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: i can say about this
- [5/25/2015 2:36:16 PM] Flareth Sexbang: kinky
- [5/25/2015 2:36:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: There was only one thing to do. He folded his wings and fell into the hole.
- ye
- [5/25/2015 2:36:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: go into that hole
- [5/25/2015 2:36:57 PM] Zora Sexbang: i wonder if it's
- [5/25/2015 2:36:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: an ice hole
- [5/25/2015 2:37:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: a big ice hole
- [5/25/2015 2:37:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: a big
- [5/25/2015 2:37:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: hairy
- [5/25/2015 2:37:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: icehole
- [5/25/2015 2:37:15 PM] Flareth Sexbang: F U C K
- [5/25/2015 2:37:26 PM] Flareth Sexbang: F U C K II NG G R E G
- [5/25/2015 2:37:33 PM] Flareth Sexbang: R Y A N
- [5/25/2015 2:37:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: topkek
- [5/25/2015 2:38:00 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora had jumped off of the dragon and dived into the hole.
- "A rescue mission...This might not be so bad after all!"
- ...this is what changes your mind?
- [5/25/2015 2:38:15 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 2:38:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora covered her eyes.
- "Eeny meeny miny mo, catch a tiger by the toe, if he hollars let him go, my mother said to pick the very best one and, YOU. ARE. IT!!!" She pointed to the left one.
- this just in: zorana is a 5 year old on the school playground
- [5/25/2015 2:38:54 PM] Flareth Sexbang: OH MY GOD
- [5/25/2015 2:39:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul started walking then noticed something. The bottom of the cave was wet. "Someone draw three tunics. Quickly!"
- it begins
- [5/25/2015 2:39:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: perfect
- [5/25/2015 2:40:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora quickly sketched up 3 tunics in red, green, and blue. She put on the green one, drew a pointy hat, a shield and a sword.
- "This'll be great for my cosplaying!"
- comically misses the point
- [5/25/2015 2:41:05 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh zorana
- [5/25/2015 2:41:13 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Good point." Esaul was drawing some Iron on his shoes, but he looked at the water, and realized it was purple. "Uh-Oh. Bad news."
- ....squints
- [5/25/2015 2:41:29 PM] Zora Sexbang: the only point in any of the games where i can remember the water being poisonous
- [5/25/2015 2:41:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: was majora's mask
- [5/25/2015 2:41:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...wait tp too but i dont think any of us had played it at that point
- [5/25/2015 2:41:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: so was this
- [5/25/2015 2:41:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: a reference i missed
- [5/25/2015 2:42:43 PM] Flareth Sexbang: could be
- [5/25/2015 2:43:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: The pencil went through Esaul's hair and got stuck. He eventually pulled it out, his hair very messy. "New hairdo. -_-"
- exactly how big was your hair for that to happen
- [5/25/2015 2:43:21 PM] Flareth Sexbang: dan hair
- [5/25/2015 2:43:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh my god could you imagine
- [5/25/2015 2:43:46 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i'm imagining it right now
- [5/25/2015 2:43:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: thats
- [5/25/2015 2:43:53 PM] Zora Sexbang: amazing
- [5/25/2015 2:44:53 PM] Flareth Sexbang: dumb hair
- [5/25/2015 2:45:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: [2:44:26 PM] Zora Sexbang: so i feel like you should know that flareth and i are currently discussing the idea of rhythm with dan hair
- [2:44:30 PM] Zora Sexbang: just imagine for a minute
- [2:44:51 PM] Markku: ...
- [2:44:55 PM] Markku: rhythm sexbang
- [2:44:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: yes
- [2:45:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: are you imagining it
- [2:45:21 PM] Markku: yes
- [2:45:29 PM] Zora Sexbang: good
- [5/25/2015 2:46:22 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ....god we need to get him here
- [5/25/2015 2:47:08 PM] Flareth Sexbang: IF HE''S INTERESTED
- [5/25/2015 2:47:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: [2:46:13 PM] Markku: "this is why everyone turns lesbian"
- [2:46:16 PM] Markku: girlfriend firing shots
- [2:46:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: omg
- [2:46:29 PM] Zora Sexbang: bless
- [5/25/2015 2:47:50 PM] Flareth Sexbang: FUCKING
- [5/25/2015 2:52:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: He shot the LS at the target. Suddenly the world flipped upside down...or at least the tunnel.
- is this another reference that i missed
- [5/25/2015 2:52:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: because iirc the stone tower temple did this and i didnt play MM till this year
- [5/25/2015 2:52:28 PM] Markku: that might have been a MM reference yeah
- [5/25/2015 2:52:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: that and the poisoned water from just before
- [5/25/2015 2:53:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: The tunnel flipped back, and Zora, who was standing over the point where the hole was supposed to be, fell into it, screaming.
- zorana is not very smart, apparently
- [5/25/2015 2:53:29 PM] Flareth Sexbang: indeed
- [5/25/2015 2:53:32 PM] Markku: later fucker
- [5/25/2015 2:54:13 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora had been falling for a long time.
- "I wonder when this hole ends?"
- That's when she hit water. She swam up to the surface to see the end of the tunnel. She heard the roaring of a waterfall. She looked around to se that thw place she was at greatly resembled...
- yes
- [5/25/2015 2:54:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: yes it is exactly what you think it is
- [5/25/2015 2:54:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: wooooo
- [5/25/2015 2:54:29 PM] Zora Sexbang: name confusion central
- [5/25/2015 2:55:00 PM] Zora Sexbang: apparently she had been falling long enough to stop screaming and wonder when she hits the bottom
- [5/25/2015 2:55:01 PM] Zora Sexbang: okay
- [5/25/2015 2:55:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Yelling?" Zora asked, "By the way, I've always wanted to meet one of you..." Zora said, turning to the, well, she'd refer to him as a person, "What's your name?"
- "Bob. Nice to meet you."
- .....
- [5/25/2015 2:55:39 PM] Flareth Sexbang: bob
- [5/25/2015 2:55:45 PM] Markku: good
- [5/25/2015 2:55:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: that's the only name i could come up with?????
- [5/25/2015 2:55:57 PM] Zora Sexbang: At least name him steve or something jfc
- [5/25/2015 2:56:02 PM] Flareth Sexbang: fucking god
- [5/25/2015 2:56:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Yes, yelling!" Jax said, "I'm near the hole, on a grabbling hook."
- grabbling
- [5/25/2015 2:56:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ....*grappling
- [5/25/2015 2:57:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul had been hanging there, staring, when he realized that the board had fallen. "Oh D*mn." Esaul said, falling into the water.
- this some fuckin looney toons physics right here
- [5/25/2015 2:57:35 PM] Markku: damn skippy
- [5/25/2015 2:57:55 PM] Flareth Sexbang: rhy's such a loser
- [5/25/2015 2:58:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: love that loser
- [5/25/2015 2:58:54 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Hey Bob. Ow." Esaul said. He had landed on his right wing. "I don't think I'll be flying for a while. Where is thi-" He cut off as he recognized the race that Bob was and he looked around. "No way. I'm dreaming." Esaul said.
- .....y'know
- [5/25/2015 2:59:11 PM] Zora Sexbang: considering the 'all just a dream' ending flareth at first wanted to do
- [5/25/2015 2:59:32 PM] Flareth Sexbang: wrong jax is dreaming
- [5/25/2015 2:59:46 PM] Flareth Sexbang: or was wupposed to
- [5/25/2015 2:59:49 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *supposed
- [5/25/2015 3:00:26 PM] Zora Sexbang: this is the part where they get eaten by a whale isnt it
- [5/25/2015 3:00:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: soon
- [5/25/2015 3:01:11 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Oh? I can fix that." Zora drew a cast on Esaul's wing,
- ...considering he said your drawn wings look flimsy earlier i'm inclined to believe you're not a 100% good artist zorana
- [5/25/2015 3:01:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: then again you do technically become a doctor
- [5/25/2015 3:01:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: of sorts
- [5/25/2015 3:01:39 PM] Zora Sexbang: so maybe this is the exception
- [5/25/2015 3:02:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 3:02:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Thanks." Esaul said gratefully. "This princess you speak of." Esaul spoke to Bob. "Her name wouldn't happen to be Ruto, would it?"
- it begins
- [5/25/2015 3:02:50 PM] Zora Sexbang: again
- [5/25/2015 3:03:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora found the end of the tunnel, and surfaced. She saw a clear, blue lake, with several islands and a wierd shack-like building.
- i was clearly the master of descriptions back then
- [5/25/2015 3:03:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: c l e a r l y
- [5/25/2015 3:03:52 PM] Markku: master
- [5/25/2015 3:03:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *weird
- [5/25/2015 3:04:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: shhhh
- [5/25/2015 3:04:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I wanna go back to FairyTaleLand." Jax said.
- of course you do
- [5/25/2015 3:04:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: you want to touych shrek
- [5/25/2015 3:04:30 PM] Zora Sexbang: on the weewee
- [5/25/2015 3:04:32 PM] Flareth Sexbang: O F C OU R S E JAX
- [5/25/2015 3:04:35 PM] Flareth Sexbang: nO
- [5/25/2015 3:04:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: imagine it
- [5/25/2015 3:04:45 PM] Markku: ogredong
- [5/25/2015 3:04:49 PM] Flareth Sexbang: n o no noonononoonononono
- [5/25/2015 3:04:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: it has layer
- [5/25/2015 3:04:59 PM] Flareth Sexbang: f u c k
- [5/25/2015 3:05:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: onionballs
- [5/25/2015 3:05:10 PM] Flareth Sexbang: n o np no
- [5/25/2015 3:06:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: (I'll be right back, gotta go cut weeds.)
- i always thought it was cute how we did this like it was an im
- [5/25/2015 3:06:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I totally forgot I had two kinds of wings!"
- no you don't
- [5/25/2015 3:07:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: you don't and everyone knows it
- [5/25/2015 3:07:20 PM] Flareth Sexbang: omg we were so cute
- [5/25/2015 3:07:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: "You'll learn fast. One dungeon is all it takes. Of course, I've been playing these games since I was 1."
- the self insert is strong
- [5/25/2015 3:08:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Oh, the pain... why not the Mushroom Kingdom, oh why?".
- imagine the characters in a mario romhack
- [5/25/2015 3:08:26 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh god
- [5/25/2015 3:08:30 PM] Markku: omg
- [5/25/2015 3:08:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...i wish i knew good romhacking software because i would do it
- [5/25/2015 3:09:11 PM] Markku: so uh
- [5/25/2015 3:09:26 PM] Markku: i've been learning how to use visual novel software
- [5/25/2015 3:09:30 PM] Flareth Sexbang: .......
- [5/25/2015 3:09:35 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...oh boy
- [5/25/2015 3:09:36 PM] Flareth Sexbang: .....yes
- [5/25/2015 3:09:41 PM] Flareth Sexbang: dating sim
- \
- [5/25/2015 3:10:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: brb
- [5/25/2015 3:10:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Something bad is gonna happen. Pessimism is the best form of answer."
- laughs loudly
- [5/25/2015 3:11:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: zed you have no idea
- [5/25/2015 3:12:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: He scooted to the side, revealing a path.
- mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep. mweep.
- [5/25/2015 3:12:22 PM | Edited 3:12:26 PM] Zora Sexbang: ad nauseam
- [5/25/2015 3:12:30 PM] Markku: wonderful
- [5/25/2015 3:13:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Hey. Wait a minute. This wasn't in the final version..." Esaul said, looking straight at a pedestal with an ocarina. "The fabled Ocarina Pedestal."
- the fabled BETA CONTENT
- [5/25/2015 3:13:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: *dramatic music*
- [5/25/2015 3:13:28 PM] Markku: dundundun
- [5/25/2015 3:15:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: " Anáil nathrach, ortha bháis is beatha, do chéal déanaimh." The locked door opened instantly.
- ???????
- [5/25/2015 3:15:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: what did this?
- [5/25/2015 3:15:26 PM] Zora Sexbang: mean?????
- [5/25/2015 3:15:37 PM] Markku: oh god what even language is that
- [5/25/2015 3:15:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: i dont know?????
- [5/25/2015 3:15:53 PM] Zora Sexbang: it looks gaelic tho
- [5/25/2015 3:15:58 PM] Markku: it look-yes
- [5/25/2015 3:16:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: What the heck was that, Esaul?" Jax said, running through.
- good question jax
- [5/25/2015 3:16:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: "The Ministry of Darkness teaches you things."
- ?????????????
- [5/25/2015 3:16:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: ?
- [5/25/2015 3:16:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: ???
- [5/25/2015 3:16:56 PM] Markku: that was a wrestling reference
- [5/25/2015 3:16:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: ..............
- [5/25/2015 3:17:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: OF COURSE IT WAS
- [5/25/2015 3:17:06 PM] Markku: wAIT
- [5/25/2015 3:17:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: ?
- [5/25/2015 3:17:24 PM] Markku: i think i've got it pls continue while i do research
- [5/25/2015 3:17:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: ye
- [5/25/2015 3:18:00 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora noticed the unlocked doors and felt embarrassed.
- "Can we do it the traditional way until Bigocto?"
- why do it the hard way
- [5/25/2015 3:18:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Why go for the hard way, Zor." Jax said.
- ....oh
- [5/25/2015 3:18:34 PM] Markku: flawless
- [5/25/2015 3:18:39 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5/25/2015 3:18:41 PM] Flareth Sexbang: back
- [5/25/2015 3:18:53 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i may or may not have spooned out some cookie butter to just eat
- [5/25/2015 3:18:55 PM] Flareth Sexbang: no bread
- [5/25/2015 3:18:56 PM] Flareth Sexbang: just
- [5/25/2015 3:18:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: good girl
- [5/25/2015 3:19:00 PM] Flareth Sexbang: me a spoon and cookie butter
- [5/25/2015 3:19:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Ok." Jax sighed, "We're going back to Shrek world later, right? Those guys are lost, are they not?"
- *paps jax*
- [5/25/2015 3:19:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I dunno. Probably. We WILL have to come back for the Temple of Time part." Zora said, noticing two oddly shaped stones now in her pocket.
- ...zorana where
- [5/25/2015 3:19:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: did
- [5/25/2015 3:19:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: you get those
- [5/25/2015 3:19:45 PM] Zora Sexbang: did they just materialize
- [5/25/2015 3:19:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: why do you say they gotta come back
- [5/25/2015 3:20:21 PM] Flareth Sexbang: butt stones
- [5/25/2015 3:20:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: "We HAVE to do it by the book. The door won't open otherwise."
- in which i railroad
- [5/25/2015 3:21:11 PM] Zora Sexbang: .................is this the part
- [5/25/2015 3:21:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: the butt
- [5/25/2015 3:21:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: where jax has her schism about osmosis jones
- [5/25/2015 3:21:26 PM] Flareth Sexbang: fuck maybe
- [5/25/2015 3:21:35 PM] Flareth Sexbang: me
- [5/25/2015 3:21:36 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i
- [5/25/2015 3:21:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: just fucking
- [5/25/2015 3:21:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Relax, relax. I can get through this in under 10 minutes at home. We'll be out of here soon."
- its true
- [5/25/2015 3:21:53 PM] Zora Sexbang: i can speedrun jabu
- [5/25/2015 3:21:56 PM] Flareth Sexbang: hides under vending machine
- [5/25/2015 3:23:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul opened the door and ventured into a room with suction holes. "Oh no, I hate this room!"
- ah yes
- [5/25/2015 3:23:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: the Room of Buttholes
- [5/25/2015 3:23:30 PM] Flareth Sexbang: put it in
- [5/25/2015 3:23:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: the buttholes that you
- [5/25/2015 3:23:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: fall through
- [5/25/2015 3:23:50 PM] Flareth Sexbang: enter the butt
- [5/25/2015 3:24:11 PM] Zora Sexbang: realistically i'm pretty sure they're ulcers
- [5/25/2015 3:24:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: but no
- [5/25/2015 3:24:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: they're buttholes
- [5/25/2015 3:24:21 PM] Flareth Sexbang: enter the ass
- [5/25/2015 3:24:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...on that note how, disregarding the magic teleporter thing, did link get back out of jabu
- [5/25/2015 3:25:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: he couldnt go out through the mouth it was a mile away
- [5/25/2015 3:25:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: shit
- [5/25/2015 3:25:20 PM] Flareth Sexbang: .....im sorry
- [5/25/2015 3:25:25 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but he was crapped out
- [5/25/2015 3:25:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: ..quite
- [5/25/2015 3:25:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: he was crapped out by a whale
- [5/25/2015 3:25:57 PM] Markku: wonderful imagery
- [5/25/2015 3:26:07 PM] Zora Sexbang: just crawls out through the bunghole
- [5/25/2015 3:26:16 PM] Flareth Sexbang: and everyone is watching
- [5/25/2015 3:26:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Esaul!" Jax screamed.
- Then she heard a voice.
- "HAY LISTEN!"
- Was she imagining it?
- "HAY LISTEN!"
- [5/25/2015 3:26:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: nO
- [5/25/2015 3:26:30 PM] Zora Sexbang: NOOOOOOOOOO
- [5/25/2015 3:27:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: Electricity still flowed throughout his body. In his unconscious state, he remembered that he had performed with his band, the song being named after him. He really needed a place for his head now...
- 1. electrical flow stops when contact is broken
- 2. this just in: rhy is the guy from linkin park
- [5/25/2015 3:27:40 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ........................................
- [5/25/2015 3:27:42 PM] Markku: always
- [5/25/2015 3:27:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh my god
- [5/25/2015 3:28:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: The electricity seemed to be cured. But without warning, Esaul's wings flew out and lifted the unconscious body in the air, flying to the highest level until he was out of sight.
- b ye
- [5/25/2015 3:28:13 PM] Flareth Sexbang: his planet needs him
- [5/25/2015 3:28:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: i just imagine the rest standing there under him, staring up
- [5/25/2015 3:28:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: 'the fuck was that'
- [5/25/2015 3:28:52 PM] Markku: knuckles jump glitch
- [5/25/2015 3:28:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: rdhggfdjgjhk
- [5/25/2015 3:29:07 PM] Flareth Sexbang: O H MY GOD
- [5/25/2015 3:30:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I believe we are in the BigOcto room." He looked up and saw the Sapphire. "Yes, we are." Esaul sighed.
- guess what time it is
- [5/25/2015 3:30:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: it is time
- [5/25/2015 3:30:13 PM] Zora Sexbang: for
- [5/25/2015 3:30:15 PM] Zora Sexbang: the ass shine
- [5/25/2015 3:30:21 PM] Flareth Sexbang: big booty bitches
- [5/25/2015 3:30:54 PM] Zora Sexbang: And it was in time, too. The giant octorok was paralyzed as Zora made it to the back of the thing and stabbed its big glowing buttspot.
- buttspot!
- [5/25/2015 3:31:11 PM] Flareth Sexbang: booty
- [5/25/2015 3:31:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: ax grabbed the sword, ran around to the shining butt and hit it.
- shiny butt
- [6/8/2015 6:30:12 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ARE WE GONNA DO THE REST OF THE RP
- [6/8/2015 6:30:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: yes we are
- [6/8/2015 6:30:25 PM] Flareth Sexbang: SANITY CRUMBLES AS I HAVE TO GRUMP IT AND LOSE MY ARM
- [6/8/2015 6:32:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: *cracks knuckles* GUESS WHAT GUYS
- [6/8/2015 6:32:19 PM] Markku: WHAT
- [6/8/2015 6:32:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: WHENEVER YOU'RE READY
- [6/8/2015 6:32:25 PM] Zora Sexbang: IT'S BUTTSHINE TIME
- [6/8/2015 6:32:35 PM] Flareth Sexbang: YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
- [6/8/2015 6:34:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: everything is all queued up
- [6/8/2015 6:34:45 PM] Zora Sexbang: are you fuckers ready
- [6/8/2015 6:34:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: i know flareth is
- [6/8/2015 6:34:53 PM] Flareth Sexbang: im fucking stoked
- [6/8/2015 6:34:55 PM] Markku: let's do it
- [6/8/2015 6:35:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: And it was in time, too. The giant octorok was paralyzed as Zora made it to the back of the thing and stabbed its big glowing buttspot.
- the buttshine
- [6/8/2015 6:35:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: we left off literally at the start of this part
- [6/8/2015 6:35:49 PM] Flareth Sexbang: booty shines
- [6/8/2015 6:35:57 PM] Markku: wonderful
- [6/8/2015 6:36:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: the buttspot indeed
- [6/8/2015 6:36:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax grabbed the sword, ran around to the shining butt and hit it.
- i want the booty
- [6/8/2015 6:36:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: give me the booty
- [6/8/2015 6:36:36 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh my god
- [6/8/2015 6:36:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: comin' for that booty
- [6/8/2015 6:36:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: we need to tell brandong about spongebob booty man
- [6/8/2015 6:36:53 PM] Markku: what
- [6/8/2015 6:36:53 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh my god
- [6/8/2015 6:37:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: :3c
- [6/2/2015 12:07:00 AM] Flareth Sexbang: if only it was in better quality
- [6/2/2015 12:07:53 AM] Flareth Sexbang: .......this was in the the videos on the side
- [6/2/2015 12:07:54 AM] Flareth Sexbang: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UewwWaNfYIU
- [6/2/2015 12:08:09 AM] Flareth Sexbang: thank
- [6/2/2015 12:08:37 AM] Flareth Sexbang: i wonder if there's a spongebob amv to this
- [6/2/2015 12:09:30 AM] Flareth Sexbang: add
- [6/2/2015 12:09:55 AM] Flareth Sexbang: add "spongebob booty man" to one of the weirdest things I've ever searched
- [6/2/2015 12:10:01 AM] Flareth Sexbang: no, by the way
- [6/2/2015 12:10:33 AM] Flareth Sexbang: that needs to change
- [6/2/2015 12:10:53 AM] Darby: Are… are you making Spongebob Booty Man?
- [6/2/2015 12:11:01 AM] Flareth Sexbang: ....i kinda want to
- [6/2/2015 12:11:05 AM] Zora Sexbang: omg
- [6/8/2015 6:38:03 PM] Flareth Sexbang: (I wanted to, but I have shittty software))
- [6/8/2015 6:39:26 PM] Markku: Markku stares violently at Premiere
- [6/8/2015 6:39:33 PM] Markku: .... nooooo
- [6/8/2015 6:39:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: .............
- [6/8/2015 6:39:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: do it
- [6/8/2015 6:39:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: dooooooooooo iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit
- [6/8/2015 6:39:52 PM] Flareth Sexbang: what version of premiere do you have?
- [6/8/2015 6:40:44 PM] Markku: Premiere Pro CC 7
- [6/8/2015 6:42:00 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ah
- [6/8/2015 6:42:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: I have Premiere Elements 13
- [6/8/2015 6:42:45 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora was barely conscious.
- IT BARELY TOUCHED YOU
- [6/8/2015 6:42:55 PM] Flareth Sexbang: omg
- [6/8/2015 6:43:01 PM] Markku: welp
- [6/8/2015 6:43:26 PM] Zora Sexbang: zorana you weener how did you go from this to hardcore gross surgery on dead things master
- [6/8/2015 6:43:32 PM] Flareth Sexbang: omg
- [6/8/2015 6:43:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Looks like I'm gonna have to lead now! The Unikonta takes a while to fully heal the body."
- the hwat
- [6/8/2015 6:44:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: what the fuck is this
- [6/8/2015 6:44:07 PM] Zora Sexbang: what is this reference
- [6/8/2015 6:44:07 PM] Markku: the fuck
- [6/8/2015 6:44:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: is it a reference
- [6/8/2015 6:44:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: we just dont know
- [6/8/2015 6:44:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unikont
- [6/8/2015 6:44:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ?????????????????????????????????????????????????????
- [6/8/2015 6:44:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: ???????????????????
- [6/8/2015 6:44:45 PM] Markku: ?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
- [6/8/2015 6:45:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax spun the sword and hit the butt shine.
- buttshine!
- [6/8/2015 6:45:43 PM] Flareth Sexbang: https://youtu.be/hRtLDQVHIEc?t=1323
- [6/8/2015 6:45:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: A R I N
- [6/8/2015 6:46:08 PM] Flareth Sexbang: F U CKING
- [6/8/2015 6:46:23 PM] Markku: that series is amazing but also painful xD
- [6/8/2015 6:46:40 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6/8/2015 6:46:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ...i wanna join it i wanna dance
- [6/8/2015 6:47:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora took it, and drank it.
- "Hmm... Tastes like cherry!" She said, and she was able to stand without hurting again.
- are u sure
- [6/8/2015 6:47:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: what if it tastes like the blood of your enemies
- [6/8/2015 6:47:26 PM] Flareth Sexbang: does it taste like melons
- [6/8/2015 6:47:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: gdfhghj
- [6/8/2015 6:47:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Much, thanx."
- vomits blood
- [6/8/2015 6:48:02 PM] Flareth Sexbang: omg
- [6/8/2015 6:48:10 PM] Markku: oh
- [6/8/2015 6:48:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: i was a shitlord
- [6/8/2015 6:48:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: As the platform reached the top, Esaul started toward the vines.
- ---
- Jax clung to the vines and shimmied up.
- i dunno how to tell you guys this but
- [6/8/2015 6:49:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: those ain't vines
- [6/8/2015 6:49:07 PM] Flareth Sexbang: omg
- [6/8/2015 6:49:44 PM | Edited 6:49:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: you are climbing on gross diseased spongey flesh
- [6/8/2015 6:50:20 PM] Flareth Sexbang: did we really wanna think about that
- [6/8/2015 6:50:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Good. Now to get rid of this web." Esaul slashed the web with Falchion, but to no avail. Fire. He thought. He grabbed a stick, wondering how it got into Jabu Jabu, then set it on fire with a burning torch nearby. It's a mystery I'll never solve. he thought, setting the web on fire.
- he probably just
- [6/8/2015 6:50:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: yknow
- [6/8/2015 6:50:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: ate it
- [6/8/2015 6:50:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: F U C K
- [6/8/2015 6:51:00 PM] Zora Sexbang: do you even master quest there's like rocks and cows in there in that shit
- [6/8/2015 6:51:15 PM] Zora Sexbang: that dumbass whale will eat /anything/
- [6/8/2015 6:51:30 PM] Markku: even the masterful dong itself
- [6/8/2015 6:51:35 PM] Zora Sexbang: yes
- [6/8/2015 6:51:41 PM | Edited 6:51:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: he will eat dong
- [6/8/2015 6:51:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: young dong
- [6/8/2015 6:51:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: f u c k
- [6/8/2015 6:52:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...wait a inute.
- [6/8/2015 6:52:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: minute*
- [6/8/2015 6:52:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: this is brandong from like 8 years ago we're talking about here.
- [6/8/2015 6:52:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: so it is literally
- [6/8/2015 6:52:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: young dong
- [6/8/2015 6:52:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: o m g
- [6/8/2015 6:52:33 PM] Markku: welp
- [6/8/2015 6:55:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora followed intently, ready to be electrocuted into oblivion by Barinade.
- ...kinky
- [6/8/2015 6:55:35 PM] Flareth Sexbang: o course
- [6/8/2015 6:55:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: i bet she's into that
- [6/8/2015 6:56:08 PM] Flareth Sexbang: probs
- [6/8/2015 6:56:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ......
- [6/8/2015 6:56:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: Anáil nathrach, ortha bháis is beatha, do chéal déanaimh. Esaul chanted, his hand on the lock. It didn't open. He sighed, then chanted, Anáil nathrach, ortha bháis is beatha, do chéal déanaimh. Serpent's breath, charm of death and life, thy omen of making. The door, instead of opening, exploded, then retracted and disappeared. "Wasn't expecting that." Esaul said, then walked into the room.
- oh. he gave us an english translation anyway
- [6/8/2015 6:56:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: seriously what language is this
- [6/8/2015 6:57:57 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora walked into the room, pretty freaked out at what ha just happened. Then she saw it. A huge, pulsating, membraneous thing sitting there, giving off electrical discharge.
- even back then i wasn't /bad/ at descriptions
- [6/8/2015 6:58:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: i just couldnt be assed to do them
- [6/8/2015 6:58:12 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6/8/2015 6:58:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: compare that to this passage:
- [6/8/2015 6:58:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: The ribs were still pliable, and easy to break and move out of the way for access to the innards within. Its windpipe and its small, juvenile lungs felt stiff to the touch, as if the workings inside had been petrified. Had it known not to breathe in when whatever had happened, happened? Oh, this was unfortunate... yes, they were heavy with glass, there wouldn't even be a need to weight them...
- [6/8/2015 6:59:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: i have only improved but i was still not /too/ bad
- [6/8/2015 7:00:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: He unsheathed Falchion and got into his M.O.D stance.
- ???
- [6/8/2015 7:00:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: what the fuck is this
- [6/8/2015 7:00:53 PM] Markku: i was coming up with all kinds of shit back then like wow
- [6/8/2015 7:01:11 PM] Zora Sexbang: and i bet you have no idea what any of it means now
- [6/8/2015 7:01:25 PM] Markku: lolnope
- [6/8/2015 7:01:40 PM] Flareth Sexbang: m.o.d
- [6/8/2015 7:02:10 PM] Markku: AHAHAH WAIT I THINK I KNOW WHAT IT IS
- [6/8/2015 7:02:13 PM] Zora Sexbang: O:
- [6/8/2015 7:02:13 PM] Markku: holy shit
- [6/8/2015 7:02:26 PM] Markku: "The Ministry of Darkness was a heel professional wrestling stable in the World Wrestling Federation (WWF) in 1999. Led by The Undertaker, the Ministry was a controversial group with pseudo-Satanic themed storylines, that included rituals and sacrifices."
- [6/8/2015 7:02:30 PM] Markku: M.O.D
- [6/8/2015 7:02:32 PM] Markku: fuck
- [6/8/2015 7:02:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: of COURSE
- [6/8/2015 7:02:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh my god.
- [6/8/2015 7:03:18 PM] Markku: i'm done
- [6/8/2015 7:03:19 PM] Markku: so done
- [6/8/2015 7:03:25 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zed drawn another one for himself. "I want to end thiiiiiis...."
- i kind of feel bad for poor unk
- [6/8/2015 7:03:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: we dragged him through a lot of our shit
- [6/8/2015 7:03:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...then again when we got to his stuff they tended to be awesome
- [6/8/2015 7:04:00 PM] Zora Sexbang: remember the time we blew up springfield
- [6/8/2015 7:04:01 PM] Flareth Sexbang: YE
- [6/8/2015 7:04:08 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ....oh god
- [6/8/2015 7:04:10 PM] Flareth Sexbang: good times
- [6/8/2015 7:06:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul jumped and did a little slash he likes to call Illusion.
- why was this called illusion if it had nothing to do with illusions
- [6/8/2015 7:06:25 PM] Zora Sexbang: also aaaaaaa my ears
- [6/8/2015 7:06:49 PM] Markku: what is going on
- [6/8/2015 7:07:59 PM] Flareth Sexbang: jobel is experiencing nirvana
- [6/8/2015 7:08:17 PM] Flareth Sexbang: WITH THE LIGHTS OUT, IT'S LESS DANGEROUS
- [6/8/2015 7:08:29 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul looked up and saw a green circle saying Finish. "WTH." Esaul said, astonished.
- [6/8/2015 7:08:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: >wth
- [6/8/2015 7:08:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: > w t h
- [6/8/2015 7:08:39 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ye
- [6/8/2015 7:08:42 PM] Flareth Sexbang: wth
- [6/8/2015 7:08:47 PM] Markku: wth
- [6/8/2015 7:08:52 PM] Flareth Sexbang: well we didn't say fuck back then
- [6/8/2015 7:09:15 PM] Flareth Sexbang: except maybe u zora
- [6/8/2015 7:09:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: i fucked everything back then
- [6/8/2015 7:09:53 PM] Flareth Sexbang: .....perfect
- [6/8/2015 7:10:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: im experiencing nirvana
- [6/8/2015 7:10:27 PM] Markku: welp
- [6/8/2015 7:10:33 PM] Flareth Sexbang: bunny girl nirvana
- [6/8/2015 7:10:39 PM] Markku: also brb
- [6/8/2015 7:10:41 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ok
- [6/8/2015 7:11:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: vietnamese pokemon coming up
- [6/8/2015 7:11:54 PM] Zora Sexbang: y e s
- [6/8/2015 7:14:29 PM] Flareth Sexbang: what's with the audio tho
- [6/8/2015 7:14:33 PM] Flareth Sexbang: it keeps on skipping
- [6/8/2015 7:14:59 PM] Flareth Sexbang: the foreign Pokemon tehem
- [6/8/2015 7:15:01 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *theme
- [6/8/2015 7:15:10 PM] Flareth Sexbang: .......i blame jobel
- [6/8/2015 7:17:07 PM] Flareth Sexbang: silence
- [6/8/2015 7:21:23 PM] Flareth Sexbang: gearing of ass
- [6/8/2015 7:27:54 PM] Markku: ... i have returned
- [6/8/2015 7:27:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yay
- [6/8/2015 7:27:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: hello
- [6/8/2015 7:29:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: ass gain magical egg
- [6/8/2015 7:29:29 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6/8/2015 7:30:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but let's continue
- [6/8/2015 7:31:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Whee!" Jax yelled, "IT's a Nintendo SIXTY FOUUUUUUUR!"
- memelord
- [6/8/2015 7:31:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: fuckin memelord
- [6/8/2015 7:31:55 PM] Markku: omg
- [6/8/2015 7:31:56 PM] Flareth Sexbang: >implyiing you didn't know that
- [6/8/2015 7:32:57 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Mind you, you're in water." Esaul said to Jax.
- --
- "Rubber springs." Jax said, jumping.
- ---
- "Clever." Esaul praised.
- ...p-physics doesnt
- [6/8/2015 7:32:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: work like that
- [6/8/2015 7:33:11 PM] Flareth Sexbang: fuck physics
- [6/8/2015 7:33:17 PM] Flareth Sexbang: tiamat and brian in the distance
- [6/8/2015 7:33:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora patted her other pocket, and pulled out a deep, royal blue ocarina.
- "I love this town."
- you won't for long
- [6/8/2015 7:34:03 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ha
- [6/8/2015 7:34:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: it's /this/ part, oh boy
- [6/8/2015 7:34:25 PM] Markku: welp
- [6/8/2015 7:35:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul took it, examined the keys, then tested a note. "Glad I learned how to play a flute." Esaul said. He stood on the pedestal, then began to play a song. It was a different song, one that was calm but full of action. Images went through Esaul's mind. He hesitated, then continuted playing. The pedestal suddenly started to glow, then the light launched into the air, like the effect you get when playing the Sun's Song. Esaul stopped, but that was because his Falchion was floating out of his sheath and into the sky. It had started glowing, then came back to the earth with a clang.
- ???
- [6/8/2015 7:35:19 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ((well silver's dad is giovanni)
- [6/8/2015 7:35:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but what u do esaul
- [6/8/2015 7:35:39 PM] Markku: magic
- [6/8/2015 7:36:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: "That pedastal is wierd." Zora said.
- same
- [6/8/2015 7:36:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: "For once, I agree with you." Esaul said. He cautiously went toward the sword and looked straight at it. "It doesn't seem to be any different." Esaul reached his hand out toward the sword. Instantly he felt a shock as if lightning had gone through your body. He stumbled and fell flat on his back.
- did you turn it into a honedge or something????
- [6/8/2015 7:36:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: what the fuck
- [6/8/2015 7:37:12 PM] Flareth Sexbang: I AM....I AM A MONSTER
- [6/8/2015 7:37:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: this is /stupidly/ relevant to this scene
- [6/8/2015 7:37:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: thank u joel
- [6/8/2015 7:38:20 PM] Flareth Sexbang: COACH
- [6/8/2015 7:38:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ilu joel
- [6/8/2015 7:38:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: "No...I think I played the wrong song." Esaul said. He still had the ocarina, so he stood up and began to play a new song.
- yes. /that's/ the issue.
- [6/8/2015 7:38:50 PM] Zora Sexbang: not the floating lightning sword.
- [6/8/2015 7:39:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: but that you played the wrong fucking song
- [6/8/2015 7:39:07 PM] Flareth Sexbang: fucking
- [6/8/2015 7:39:14 PM] Flareth Sexbang: what are we naming the riival?
- [6/8/2015 7:39:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: Me: "Zed"
- [6/8/2015 7:40:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: wrrrrrrrrys into the night
- [6/8/2015 7:41:11 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax started to cackle insanely.
- --
- Zora looked over.
- "What's wrong with you?"
- --
- "Nothing." Jax coughed.
- --
- "Feeling Flippy?" Zora asked.
- looking back, happy tree friends was actually kind of shit
- [6/8/2015 7:41:20 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yeah
- [6/8/2015 7:41:26 PM] Markku: yeah
- [6/8/2015 7:41:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: this must be what growing up is like
- [6/8/2015 7:42:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: "...Yeah. What now?" Zora asked, "We will, of course, have to come back for the Temple of Time, as the sequence of events we take now may alter the fate of this place called Blahblahland."
- More than you know, Ms. Seventh Sage
- [6/8/2015 7:43:03 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ah
- [6/8/2015 7:43:11 PM] Flareth Sexbang: the dong never dies
- [6/8/2015 7:43:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: dong dong never die
- [6/8/2015 7:43:23 PM] Markku: dong
- [6/8/2015 7:43:29 PM] Flareth Sexbang: young dong
- [6/8/2015 7:43:35 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...young d-
- [6/8/2015 7:43:39 PM] Zora Sexbang: thank u flareth
- [6/8/2015 7:44:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul stopped a few inches from Falchion. It didn't seem to shock him, but it felt...shadowy...evil. He grabbed the hilt of the sword and looked it all over. He spotted a dark aura around it. It seemed sharper and longer.
- then, y'know
- [6/8/2015 7:44:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: maybe you shouldn't
- [6/8/2015 7:44:15 PM] Zora Sexbang: touch it
- [6/8/2015 7:44:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: you git
- [6/8/2015 7:44:29 PM] Flareth Sexbang: goddamnit
- [6/8/2015 7:44:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul let go of the sword, and put the ocarina up to his mouth. But the sword came with his hand and almost slashed him across the face. "GAH!" He yelled, then realized that the aura was clinging on to him. Esaul was lost for words, looking horrified as the aura came up to his elbow.
- this is exactly why
- [6/8/2015 7:45:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Sol...ECNOMEI!" Jax yelled.
- wat
- [6/8/2015 7:45:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: sol is light
- [6/8/2015 7:45:42 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ecnomei i think i made up
- [6/8/2015 7:46:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I'll try it." Zora said. She picked up the ocarina, walked over to the pedastal, and played a song familiar to most who have seen the Pokemon movie about Lugia. The moon shone for a moment, and shined on Falchion, and the dark aura was gone.
- fun fact: i had no idea that there was already a moonlight sonata when i gave this a fancy name other than lugia's song
- [6/8/2015 7:46:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: beethoven is fapping in his grave
- [6/8/2015 7:46:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Why...why..." Esaul muttered, still on his knees. And then the answer dawned on him. He ran, grabbed Falchion and sprinted toward the exit.
- b ye
- [6/8/2015 7:46:51 PM] Flareth Sexbang: his planet needs him
- [6/8/2015 7:47:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul didn't answer her. All he could hear was his own chest heaving. He sprinted toward Zora's River, stopped and looked around, then jumped into the pool entering Sacred Forest Meadow.
- oh boy here we go
- [6/8/2015 7:47:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul again used his wings to propel him through the water, then jumped out, and sped toward one of the exits.
- it doesnt work like this
- [6/8/2015 7:48:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul suddenly stopped. He heard footsteps. He turned around, and spotted Zora. Esaul's eyes had turned yellow and feral.
- here it comes guys
- [6/8/2015 7:48:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6/8/2015 7:48:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora had drawn her sword out of its sheath, and was preparing to attack if necessary.
- ------
- "You want to fight, eh?" Esaul said, turning all the way around. His voice was much deeper and sharper. "Well then, so be it." Esaul armed Falchion and got into his stance.
- *one winged angel playing on kazoo*
- [6/8/2015 7:48:52 PM] Flareth Sexbang: f u c k
- [6/8/2015 7:49:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: is that a thing, i need to find out if its a thing
- [6/8/2015 7:49:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: hold on
- [6/8/2015 7:49:24 PM] Markku: there's an evangelion theme on bike horns
- [6/8/2015 7:49:29 PM] Markku: which is obsessively catchy
- [6/8/2015 7:50:11 PM] Zora Sexbang: it exists
- [6/8/2015 7:50:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: i am satisfied
- [6/8/2015 7:50:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: perfect
- [6/8/2015 7:51:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Well don't KILL him!!" Zora yelled, "Just get him incapacitated!!"
- hmmmmmmmmmmmmm
- [6/8/2015 7:51:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Pyroca Blizzarga!" Jax chanted.
- Flames and ice shards flew towards Esaul.
- ...i thought it was firaga
- [6/8/2015 7:51:51 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ...it is
- [6/8/2015 7:51:57 PM] Flareth Sexbang: :3c
- [6/8/2015 7:52:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul flew up and dodged the attack, then dived at them sword extended. But this time was different. His eyes had become normally hazel again.
- stop changing color you asshole
- [6/8/2015 7:52:51 PM] Flareth Sexbang: "my eyes change color depending on my enviroment"
- [6/8/2015 7:53:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Try to escape and I will kill you." Zora said, holding the sword dangerously close to Esaul's neck, "What happened to you?"
- HMMMMMMMMMM.
- [6/8/2015 7:53:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I have nothi-No!" Esaul said. He seemed to be fighting something back. Esaul looked up at Zora. His eyes were normally hazel instead of the yellow like before. "Zor..help...kill.." Esaul stuttered, but his eyes turned back yellow and he yelled,"No! I thought I was rid of you..."
- HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.
- [6/8/2015 7:53:46 PM] Flareth Sexbang: SQUINTS
- [6/8/2015 7:53:58 PM] Markku: violent squinting
- [6/8/2015 7:54:15 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Zor...defeat...spirit...evil." Esaul said, before he fainted.
- ---
- "We have to kill him. I was afraid of this." Zora said, trying to figure out how to kill him without hurting him.
- how exactly do you come to this conclusion
- [6/8/2015 7:54:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: how
- [6/8/2015 7:54:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: .....i have no idea
- [6/8/2015 7:54:45 PM] Zora Sexbang: "KILL HIM!" Jax cried, "THEN THISS RP-I MEAN HIS LIFE WILL BE OVER!"
- oh
- [6/8/2015 7:55:01 PM] Flareth Sexbang: that is supposed to be a "?"
- [6/8/2015 7:55:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: "NO! HIT HIM IN THE BRAIN!" Zed yelled. "I saw it on movies."
- ...zed sir that would also kill him
- [6/8/2015 7:55:36 PM] Markku: zed pls
- [6/8/2015 7:55:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: zed >_<
- [6/8/2015 7:55:57 PM] Zora Sexbang: "We have to... It's the only choice...You heard him say kill...AND STOP BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL!!" Zora said/yelled to Jax, and when she yelled, the sword went into Esaul's neck.
- there it is
- [6/8/2015 7:56:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul's head sprung up, eyes looking horrified. He muttered, "Esaul..Estrin...shall not die. Take my body to the Temple of Light. There you will know what to do." And with that, his body fell into a slump.
- i can't believe rhythm is fucking dead
- [6/8/2015 7:56:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: ............again
- [6/8/2015 7:56:47 PM] Flareth Sexbang: catches pidgey
- [6/8/2015 7:56:54 PM] Flareth Sexbang: Me: "Name it Esaul"
- [6/8/2015 7:57:25 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Get my body to the Light Temple, and quickly. My body won't hold up for much longer, I can sense it." The voice said. It was becoming fainter now.
- YOU'RE ALREADY DEAD YOU ASS
- [6/8/2015 7:58:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: GO D DAMN ESAUL
- [6/8/2015 7:58:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora heard the voice, and knew what she must do. She played the Prelude of Light on the ocarina, and the group appeared in the Temple of Time.
- "OK. I play the song here..." Zora played a mysterious song, the Song of Time. The stones floated out of her pocket, swirled in the air for a bit,and fell into place in some small indents in the stone tablet at which she played the song. The wall in front of them then began to open, revealing a hidden chamber. In the hidden chamber...
- "The Master Sword..." She said to herself, and walked up to the Sword in the Pedastal of Time. She pulled it, and a doorway of light appeared.
- "Through here." Zora said, nodding toward Jax.
- and then she kept it through the whole series
- [6/8/2015 7:58:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: it is literally hanging on her bedroom wall
- [6/8/2015 7:59:01 PM] Flareth Sexbang: PERFECT
- [6/24/2015 3:43:41 PM] Flareth Sexbang: we HAVE DONG TOUCH
- [6/24/2015 3:44:11 PM] Flareth Sexbang: y o
- [6/24/2015 3:44:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: where has dong been lately anyway
- [6/24/2015 3:44:30 PM] Markku: dong expands
- [6/24/2015 3:44:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: fuck
- [6/24/2015 3:44:42 PM] Markku: I've been doing sooooo much freaking work
- [6/24/2015 3:44:47 PM] Flareth Sexbang: I see
- [6/24/2015 3:44:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: o no :c
- [6/24/2015 3:45:08 PM] Flareth Sexbang: sorry for bothering you
- [6/24/2015 3:45:24 PM] Markku: like to the point where I would look at my computer and just kinda fall on my bed instead
- [6/24/2015 3:45:30 PM] Markku: nah you weren't bothering me
- [6/24/2015 3:45:41 PM] Flareth Sexbang: good
- [6/24/2015 3:45:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: (SO SHALL WE GO ON ZORA)
- [6/24/2015 3:45:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: well first i should tell him
- [6/24/2015 3:46:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: you remember those movie posters i did ages ago
- [6/24/2015 3:46:14 PM] Markku: yes
- [6/24/2015 3:46:25 PM] Zora Sexbang: my current project is remaking them
- [6/24/2015 3:46:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: to put them in my current art style
- [6/24/2015 3:46:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: and fix up things i didnt like
- [6/24/2015 3:46:53 PM] Flareth Sexbang: YESSSS
- [6/24/2015 3:46:59 PM] Markku: ooooh
- [6/24/2015 3:47:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: and also make some new ones based around a fourth installment we did
- [6/24/2015 3:47:30 PM] Zora Sexbang: http://i673.photobucket.com/albums/vv97/AntipathicZora/new%20posters%20after%20all%20these%20years_zpse3orwt6d.png which i will give you a preview for now
- [6/24/2015 3:48:05 PM] Markku: oh man
- [6/24/2015 3:52:12 PM] Flareth Sexbang: so yes
- [6/24/2015 3:52:15 PM] Flareth Sexbang: shall we continue
- [6/24/2015 3:53:08 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ?
- [6/24/2015 3:53:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: gimme a minute, want to get in a little coloring on this
- [6/24/2015 3:53:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: also remember where we left off
- [6/24/2015 3:53:33 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ok
- [6/24/2015 3:53:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: also also see if brandong is up to continue this riff
- [6/24/2015 3:53:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ye
- [6/24/2015 3:53:49 PM] Markku: totes up
- [6/24/2015 3:53:57 PM] Zora Sexbang: awesome, then just a minute
- [6/24/2015 3:56:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: OKAY i think i found where we're at
- [6/24/2015 3:56:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: we were still at barinade i recall
- [6/24/2015 3:56:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: on our last episode: i can't believe rhythm is fucking dead
- [6/24/2015 3:56:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6/24/2015 3:57:09 PM] Flareth Sexbang: and buttshines
- [6/24/2015 3:57:14 PM] Markku: i can't believe rhythm is fucking dead: the movie: the game
- [6/24/2015 3:57:24 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ...we'll get nyx to make that
- [6/24/2015 3:57:40 PM] Flareth Sexbang: :3
- [6/24/2015 3:58:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh my god
- [6/24/2015 3:58:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: okay yes here we are
- [6/24/2015 3:59:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora walked through the door, and it closed behind them. It had an inscription on it.
- "If thou wisheth to return through here,
- Thou must let out all thy fear,
- To repay the debt which thou now owes,
- Play the song of sweet Time's flow...
- That's wierd, I understand it..." Zora said.
- ...you do?
- [6/24/2015 3:59:13 PM] Zora Sexbang: 'cause i don't
- [6/24/2015 3:59:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: what bullshit was i making up
- [6/24/2015 3:59:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: well sweet time's flow is obvious enough
- [6/24/2015 4:00:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I think it means we need to play the Song of Time to get out." Zora said, walking onward.
- YOU DONT SAY
- [6/24/2015 4:01:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora ran after her, but was stopped by a puff of smoke, which became a fat, bald man in an orange robe. Zora bowed.
- "Rauru, I presume?" Zora asked him.
- "Indeed, I am. You come seeking the Golden Power?"
- "No, actually, we seek a greater prize."
- ...whyyyyyyy exactly
- [6/24/2015 4:01:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: are you passing up the fucking triforce
- [6/24/2015 4:01:29 PM] Flareth Sexbang: hheeeeeeeeeee
- [6/24/2015 4:01:30 PM] Flareth Sexbang: hhhh
- [6/24/2015 4:01:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: you can just wish him back to life with that you git
- [6/24/2015 4:01:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: o mg u dumb
- [6/24/2015 4:02:16 PM] Markku: pls
- [6/24/2015 4:02:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh boy it's a legitimately long post
- [6/24/2015 4:02:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: we'll do this in parts
- [6/24/2015 4:02:47 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6/24/2015 4:03:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: "If thou must gain use of this hall,
- Thou must prove that their power will not fall...What does this mean?" Zora asked. A voice was heard.
- "Hold up the Sword..." it said. Zora drew the Master Sword out of its sheath, and held it up. The door to the Chamber opened, to reveal a beautiful room with a graceful bridge stretching across it to an island in the middle. Zora walked across the bridge, and was greeted by Rauru.
- [6/24/2015 4:03:13 PM] Zora Sexbang: i could have come up with something more clever
- [6/24/2015 4:03:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: but no
- [6/24/2015 4:03:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Have you brought him?" He asked.
- "We have." Zora replied.
- "Excellent. A malevolent force had taken him over. That sword is the source." Rauru pointed to Falchion, "However, when you played the Moon's Sonata, the spirit could not infect the sword anymore, and it moved to his body. To get it out, you could not have done anything BUT kill him..."
- "Can you restore him?"
- "The malevolent force has prevented it. However, with the aid of the Seven Sages, you can break this curse."
- ...well
- [6/24/2015 4:04:00 PM] Zora Sexbang: 1. godmodding central
- [6/24/2015 4:04:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: 2. looks at all the fresh new lore attached to characters that didnt exist when this was written
- [6/24/2015 4:04:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: laughs
- [6/24/2015 4:04:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: hehhhhhhhhhh
- [6/24/2015 4:05:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Will he remain stable here?"
- "Yes. The Sages can be found in the 5 temples, and here, as I am one of them."
- "But what about the Seventh Sage?"
- "You will meet her when the time comes. You will need the help of the Golden Power, the Triforce, to succeed."
- "But there's only 2 of us!"
- "Relax. You will be sent out directly after you obtain it. After that, you must find the Sages..." Rauru vanished.
- > rauru the big serious sage telling people to relax
- [6/24/2015 4:05:44 PM] Markku: "calm ur tits"
- [6/24/2015 4:05:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh my god
- [6/24/2015 4:06:09 PM] Flareth Sexbang: fuck
- [6/24/2015 4:06:25 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Oh no.' jax said, "he's dead. I give up."
- jax. find ur chill
- [6/24/2015 4:07:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: "With permission from Rauru," A voice said, emanating from the Master Sword, "I can talk to you via the Master Sword. I can also see where you are via the Master Sword. I can tell you aren't moving, so get to it please, I want my body back."
- swordphone
- [6/24/2015 4:07:15 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ring ring ring ring ring ring ring
- [6/24/2015 4:07:17 PM] Flareth Sexbang: swordphone
- [6/24/2015 4:07:35 PM] Markku: don't put it up to your ear
- [6/24/2015 4:07:38 PM] Markku: you won't have an ear
- [6/24/2015 4:07:46 PM] Flareth Sexbang: fucking hell
- [6/24/2015 4:08:13 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Alright. Can you tell us where we go to get the Triforce? It isn't on this map." Zora said as she began to walk.
- if he told you, wouldnt that defeat the purpose
- [6/24/2015 4:09:25 PM] Flareth Sexbang: sigh
- [6/24/2015 4:09:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Not directly, Rauru wants you to find it for yourself. But I can give you hints. This temple is full of the elements, so listen to this:
- If you seek to open the Gate
- The Key you seek is shadowed fate.
- In the secrets that lie beneath the ground.
- Is where the wisdom required is found.
- To find the third force of power,
- First you must seek the sacred flower.
- When the three gather all in one place.
- Then you shall see the sacred one's face.
- On to the realm through the gates you pass.
- Before you will stand a magnificent mass.
- Three stone structures with names familiar to you.
- The names of the gods, Din... Farore... and Nayru..."
- this was sO MUCH BETTER THAN THE ONES I CAME UP WITH
- [6/24/2015 4:11:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: ""Wow. I have NO idea what that means."
- me either
- [6/24/2015 4:11:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: heheh
- [6/24/2015 4:11:41 PM] Markku: pfft
- [6/24/2015 4:12:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: "To be honest, I don't know myself. But that's what I guessed too, so it's worth a try. But there's one thing that stumps me. What element out of the 5 is underground?" Esaul said. "I know that there's Light, Forest, Fire, Water, Shadow, and Spirit. That...oh. Never mind. I think I figured it out."
- ...tbh this doesnt actually answer anything
- [6/24/2015 4:12:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: they were /all/ underground in some form
- [6/24/2015 4:13:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: omg
- [6/24/2015 4:13:39 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Good thinking, I was certain it was Spirit. So, the Tri-watch the Wallmaster!" Esaul said, spotting a shadow beneath Zora.
- goddamn stupid hand-ass hands
- [6/24/2015 4:14:05 PM] Flareth Sexbang: indeed
- [6/24/2015 4:14:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: "So I see." Zora said, running from underneath the shadow. A hand fell down, and Zora slashed it. It shriveled into nothingness, except for a golden claw. Zora put the claw into a slot in the door, and it opened. Zora walked in, and darkness consumed her.
- "What now? Should I use the craptastic Lens of Truth you made earlier?"
- > craptastic
- [6/24/2015 4:14:57 PM] Flareth Sexbang: well it was
- [6/24/2015 4:15:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: it's a really easy thing to draw tho
- [6/24/2015 4:15:53 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul was silent. Then he piped up and said, "I suck at drawing. Don't blame me, blame the Estrin bloodline. But I don't think the Lens of Truth will drive away the darkness. Try slashing the darkness with the Master Sword."
- don't blame your genetics for something that is your own goddamn fault
- [6/24/2015 4:16:08 PM] Markku: THAT WAS IT
- [6/24/2015 4:16:17 PM] Markku: I KNEW I HAD A REASON TO MAKE THE ESTRINS FUCKING SUCK AT ART
- [6/24/2015 4:16:19 PM] Markku: THIS WAS IT
- [6/24/2015 4:16:25 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ....perfect
- [6/24/2015 4:17:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: although tbh modern zorana isn't the best non-anatomical artist herself so it's kind of a retroactive pot and kettle here
- [6/24/2015 4:17:50 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6/24/2015 4:18:00 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora then slashed the darkness. Immediately, it dispelled, and she could see. She saw a bunch of torture weapons, and several ghosts.
- "Think I should kill the ghosts?"
- no i think you should go sit on that pear of anguish right there
- [6/24/2015 4:18:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Hmm..." Esaul tried to connect to the ghosts' mind, and was successful. "No, just walk by and don't be intimidated." Esaul said when he was finished.
- i-
- [6/24/2015 4:18:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: okay
- [6/24/2015 4:18:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: sure
- [6/24/2015 4:18:52 PM] Markku: fine why not
- [6/24/2015 4:18:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: just suddenly be a telepathic master
- [6/24/2015 4:18:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: that's fine
- [6/24/2015 4:19:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Alright." Zora walked by, fearless. She opened the next door, and was faced by a giant, flaming skull.
- joel in the background
- [6/24/2015 4:20:04 PM] Flareth Sexbang: thank u jobel
- [6/24/2015 4:20:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora stabbed it, and it exploded, revealing the door. A key was in the rubble, and when Zora went to pick it up, the room got darker.
- "Part one of the riddle: SOLVED!!"
- DA NA NA NAAAAA
- [6/24/2015 4:20:14 PM] Flareth Sexbang: woooooo
- [6/24/2015 4:20:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora nodded, and used the key on the big, fancy door. She entered, and saw the beautiful golden triangle. It seemed to have small emeralds on the corners.
- "Here it is." She said, and just as she did, it vanished. She suddenly felt a need to check the map, and out of it fell a stone tablet with six symbols, and the Triforce on it. She checked the point at which the shard of Courage should be, and it was glowing. She ran out of the room.
- i approve of my past thoughts that the triforce should at least look a bit fancier
- [6/24/2015 4:21:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora figured she owed them an explination, and she explained.
- redundancy department of redundancy
- [6/24/2015 4:21:58 PM] Markku: pffff
- [6/24/2015 4:22:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: and then explained her explanation
- [6/24/2015 4:22:30 PM] Zora Sexbang: "...And to be honest, I wanted to get the Stone and go back to the TV quote place. But I have a theory. Perhaps the places we need to go are scattered not in their places in the game, but all throughout this land. We just need to get this relic." Zora held out the stone tablet, "It's called the Triforce, and it will grant its bearer unbeleivable power, endless wisdom, or proven courage."
- don't go back to the TV quote place there are apparently random disembodied wings in there that'll make your life hell
- [6/24/2015 4:22:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...let me find that passage from the 4th installment again
- [6/24/2015 4:23:00 PM] Flareth Sexbang: brb
- [6/24/2015 4:23:08 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i need to dishwasher
- [6/24/2015 4:23:51 PM] Markku: have fun
- [6/24/2015 4:24:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: [3/19/2014 9:55:35 PM] Zora Smith: *Zor is in a pile of quotes from various shows... she pulls up some kind of leathery thing* Is this... a pair of wings?
- [3/19/2014 9:56:04 PM] Flareth: Cameron: Those....sure do look like wings.
- [3/19/2014 9:57:47 PM] Zora Smith: Zor: ...I am almost afraid of what would happen if I tossed these on... however that would work. I mean we know what happened to the last guy with wings.
- [3/19/2014 9:58:11 PM] Flareth: Cameron: yeaaaaah let's just leave them here
- [3/19/2014 9:59:05 PM] Zora Smith: Zor: Yeah nope. Nope nope nope.
- [3/19/2014 9:59:57 PM] Zora Smith: *she drops them again*
- here we go
- [6/24/2015 4:25:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Triforce." Jax said, "Well, I wanna go back to the Shrek world. They might still be lost. But we hafta save Esaul."
- of COURSE you do, jax
- [6/24/2015 4:25:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: of course.
- [6/24/2015 4:26:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: but lets wait for flareth to unbrb before we keep going ye
- [6/24/2015 4:27:52 PM] Markku: yeye
- [6/24/2015 4:30:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: back
- [6/24/2015 4:31:24 PM] Flareth Sexbang: of course jax
- [6/24/2015 4:31:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: okay lets continue
- [6/24/2015 4:32:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: "WAIT!!! That has a forest, right?" Zora asked.
- zorana.
- [6/24/2015 4:32:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: swamp =/= forest
- [6/24/2015 4:32:29 PM | Edited 4:32:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: even if it kind of turned into one in canon
- [6/24/2015 4:32:33 PM] Flareth Sexbang: the swamp isn't surrounded by forest?
- [6/24/2015 4:32:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...fair enough
- [6/24/2015 4:33:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Awesome! But now isn't the time to explain." Zora said, running down the hallway.
- QUICKLY THERES NO TIME TO EXPLAIN
- [6/24/2015 4:33:21 PM] Flareth Sexbang: deez nuts
- [6/24/2015 4:33:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Hold it." Esaul said, reconnecting with them. "I can sense a great evil close by. It seems...familiar...as if I had been a part of it. You'd best be careful."
- squints
- [6/24/2015 4:33:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ......what is that even
- [6/24/2015 4:33:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: mean
- [6/24/2015 4:33:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Well, be happy, because we're supposedly headed for that Shrek place."
- Esaul said. "And, did you realize how childish you just sounded? You sounded just like-" Esaul cut off, not saying anything else.
- u ok
- [6/24/2015 4:34:11 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul disconnected from the sword and put his hands in his face. He had vowed not to mention him. Esaul sat there, hands in face, mind whirling through stream of thoughts. He finally got up, let out a sigh, then looked at the bright side of things. Besides, Esaul thought, he's probably dead now. I haven't seen him since the disaster, there's still a chance.
- He reconnected to the Master Sword and looked through.
- hmmmmmmmmmm
- [6/24/2015 4:34:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
- [6/24/2015 4:34:17 PM] Markku: huh
- [6/24/2015 4:34:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: EDGY
- [6/24/2015 4:34:42 PM] Markku: rhythm the edgehog
- [6/24/2015 4:35:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: "GAH! My...head..." Esaul yelled. "I don't like this place at all. Get out of here Zora! I can sense his presence..."
- but you didnt even mention who him was
- [6/24/2015 4:35:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: and you werent going to
- [6/24/2015 4:35:32 PM] Flareth Sexbang: hehhhh
- [6/24/2015 4:35:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul disconnected and sat down again. He couldn't be here...could he? Esaul thought. He sighed as he realized the truth. Yes, he could be. If he is, then we're all dead. Esaul just sat there, lost in his thoughts.
- dead of whaaaaaaaaaat
- [6/24/2015 4:36:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: i know i'm picking on him a lot but
- [6/24/2015 4:36:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: this part of the plot was fucking ridiculous
- [6/24/2015 4:36:34 PM] Markku: also i'll be damned if esaul isn't the easiest to pick on
- [6/24/2015 4:36:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: yeeeaaah
- [6/24/2015 4:36:41 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yessssss
- [6/24/2015 4:36:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul couldn't connect to the others without passing out, so he decided to fly around and get used to his surroundings. He launched up into the sky and flew north.
- but yOU WERE IN A CHAMBER
- [6/24/2015 4:37:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora trotted down the stairs. She ran into a door with the Spirit Symbol on it.
- "Great. Esaul isn't here and I don't know what to do...Oh? What's this?
- If the power of 3 thou dost seek,
- This passage is not for the weak." She read, "But what does it mean?"
- ...quite
- [6/24/2015 4:37:39 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul traveled around the destroyed temple and wondered, Who, no, what could have done this? Then he saw something that shocked him. Esaul had been traveling long enough to connect to the others. "Zora. ZORA! Get out of there! Never mind the Triforce, just get out of there!"
- ???
- [6/24/2015 4:37:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: ???????
- [6/24/2015 4:37:57 PM] Flareth Sexbang: breaths in
- [6/24/2015 4:38:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: A dark figure stopped them before they could go any farther.
- Esaul yelled, "NO! You're supposed to be dead!"
- The figure stepped forward. He was recognizable as a long blond-haired boy, about 13 or 14. "Ah, but I'm not, now am I. I see that you are. Pitiful. I expected more from you Esaul." The figure spotted the others. "Allow me to introduce myself. I am Marshall Estrin. Or, in other words, Esaul's brother."
- *deep breath*
- [6/24/2015 4:38:15 PM] Zora Sexbang: OOOOOOH OOOOOOHOOOOOOOOO
- [6/24/2015 4:38:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: (marshall's gay)
- [6/24/2015 4:38:22 PM] Flareth Sexbang: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3tz010cCYzA
- [6/24/2015 4:38:25 PM] Zora Sexbang: OHHHHHOOOOOOHOHOHOOOOOHOOOOOOO
- [6/24/2015 4:38:29 PM] Flareth Sexbang: :3
- [6/24/2015 4:38:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: thank
- [6/24/2015 4:39:04 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i want this to play on repeat for the rest of my life
- [6/24/2015 4:39:18 PM] Markku: good
- [6/24/2015 4:39:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: bless
- [6/24/2015 4:40:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: Marshall looked at them. His red eyes seemed to stare straight into their souls. He said, "It is simple. I cannot let you revive Esaul. He will foil my plans again." He then looked at the Master Sword again. "Still pitiful Esaul. You died untimely. I wanted to face you one on one again."
- "Shut UP! You killed them both! I am the pure heart here!"
- "Ah, but what of that blasted sword of yours. It turned you into a monster, and you say you have a pure heart?"
- "You know perfectly well that the dark spirit was capable of taking over me."
- Marshall looked back at the others. He seemed to be examining them.
- "Perfect. Easier than expected. I will see you all soon enough." He jumped and disappeared. From the spot that he disappeared, three figures dropped down. One stepped forward. "You foiled my master's plans. You will pay." He took one more step before the others came next to him.
- It was Esaul's dark form, along with dark forms of Zora and Jax.
- can we
- [6/24/2015 4:40:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: maybe
- [6/24/2015 4:40:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: elablrate
- [6/24/2015 4:40:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: please
- [6/24/2015 4:40:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: (and care aboout zed)
- [6/24/2015 4:41:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: that too
- [6/24/2015 4:41:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Heh...Heh... I know this fight." Zora whipped out the pencil and drew a craptastic model of Din's Fire. She tested her Dark Form. She swung the sword, much as Zora had.
- "OK, Jax, she'll mimic or block your every move. Use this, and it will do damage." she tossed Jax a craptastic model of Din's Fire.
- zorana no thats your sister
- [6/24/2015 4:41:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: dont
- [6/24/2015 4:42:01 PM] Zora Sexbang: stop
- [6/24/2015 4:42:17 PM] Flareth Sexbang: make it pop dj turn those speakers up
- [6/24/2015 4:42:25 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...
- [6/24/2015 4:42:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: :3
- [6/24/2015 4:42:49 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i got the lyrics wrong too
- [6/24/2015 4:42:52 PM] Flareth Sexbang: D:
- [6/24/2015 4:43:00 PM] Markku: tonight ima fight till we see the sunlight
- [6/24/2015 4:43:04 PM] Flareth Sexbang: woooooo
- [6/24/2015 4:43:04 PM] Markku: great it's in my head now
- [6/24/2015 4:43:30 PM] Flareth Sexbang: :3c
- [6/24/2015 4:43:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: A stream of light protruded from the Master Sword. A transparent Esaul stepped out of the stream, unsheathing Falchion.
- but how
- [6/24/2015 4:43:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: magic fuckery
- [6/24/2015 4:44:13 PM] Markku: the master sword can do anything
- [6/24/2015 4:44:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: Dark Zora leaped back in surprise.
- "You b*tch!" She said as she leapt towards the real Zora, who cast Din's Fire again.
- see nowadays the only fighting they do is over miffins
- [6/24/2015 4:44:22 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ....miffins
- [6/24/2015 4:44:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: muddins
- [6/24/2015 4:44:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: myffins
- [6/24/2015 4:44:29 PM] Flareth Sexbang: FUCK
- [6/24/2015 4:44:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...
- [6/24/2015 4:44:34 PM] Markku: fucking
- [6/24/2015 4:44:40 PM] Markku: thinkinh
- [6/24/2015 4:44:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: i did a thinkinh
- [6/24/2015 4:44:41 PM] Flareth Sexbang: thinkinh
- [6/24/2015 4:44:59 PM] Flareth Sexbang: that was amazing
- [6/24/2015 4:45:29 PM] Zora Sexbang: "We meet again." Dark Esaul said.
- "Yes. But this time, I will not be overpowered!" Esaul yelled, slashing wildly at Dark Esaul, who was blocking each move.
- oh okay so they know each other
- [6/24/2015 4:45:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: so. if one is a duplicate of the other.
- [6/24/2015 4:45:43 PM] Flareth Sexbang: they met at a singles bar
- [6/24/2015 4:45:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: are either of them virgins
- [6/24/2015 4:45:47 PM] Markku: oh
- [6/24/2015 4:46:07 PM] Zora Sexbang: what does 'overpowered' mean hmm rhythm
- [6/24/2015 4:46:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: were you doing
- [6/24/2015 4:46:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: buttstuff
- [6/24/2015 4:46:19 PM] Flareth Sexbang: o h
- [6/24/2015 4:46:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: *eyebrow waggle at the speed of light*
- [6/24/2015 4:47:13 PM] Markku: oh my
- [6/24/2015 4:47:39 PM] Zora Sexbang: #buttsex
- [6/24/2015 4:47:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: buttsex.info
- [6/24/2015 4:47:53 PM] Flareth Sexbang: www.buttsex.info
- [6/24/2015 4:47:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: to be precise
- [6/24/2015 4:48:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: thank
- [6/24/2015 4:49:00 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax's lips moved feebly but she drank the potion.
- "What's next, Rufflypoo?" jax said, in a daze, "Gimme my pie!"
- o-ok
- [6/24/2015 4:49:14 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i know....
- [6/24/2015 4:49:23 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *this is the moment i have been waiting for
- [6/24/2015 4:49:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Nah..the potion is messing with my head." Jax said, "NOT MY GUMDROP BUTTONS!"
- do you like, mean your nips or something
- [6/24/2015 4:49:53 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i got together on tcod (as a joke we both knew we were joking)
- [6/24/2015 4:50:04 PM] Flareth Sexbang: with a member called RuffledFeathers
- [6/24/2015 4:50:12 PM] Flareth Sexbang: (this was after mokuba and abywayax)
- [6/24/2015 4:50:16 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *abwayax
- [6/24/2015 4:50:17 PM] Flareth Sexbang: and yes
- [6/24/2015 4:50:30 PM] Flareth Sexbang: planks on the floor here it goes
- [6/24/2015 4:51:07 PM] Zora Sexbang: yadda yadda serious fighting crap that isnt /that/ bad
- [6/24/2015 4:51:30 PM] Zora Sexbang: This time, Esaul was ready. He stayed locked in the sword knot, trying to overpower Desaul. Esaul's eyes glowed brightly as he gained strength. Desaul's smile turned neutral as he was being moved back from the barrier.
- u ok
- [6/24/2015 4:51:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: okay
- [6/24/2015 4:51:49 PM] Flareth Sexbang: it's not to that part yet ok
- [6/24/2015 4:51:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: Evil. And mad. But that's what I get when I turn Thorn. He replied. Esaul was slowly overpowering Desaul.
- ??????????
- [6/24/2015 4:52:01 PM] Flareth Sexbang: thorn
- [6/24/2015 4:52:36 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but good rhythm
- [6/24/2015 4:52:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: The form I'm in now. Haven't you noticed the red streaks in my hair and the red eyes? It makes me stronger, but I don't like using it. As soon as I overpower Desaul, shoot the Light Arrow. Then you guys have to revive me and I have to face down Marshall. Esaul replied. Desaul was nearly on his knees now.
- ON HIS KNEES EH
- [6/24/2015 4:52:47 PM] Flareth Sexbang: f u c k
- [6/24/2015 4:52:56 PM] Markku: oh baby
- [6/24/2015 4:53:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: sometime years later, as a fucking goof, zorana wrote rhythm a spoof on The Beej based on this
- [6/24/2015 4:53:25 PM] Zora Sexbang: i guarantee you
- [6/24/2015 4:53:32 PM] Flareth Sexbang: f ucking hell
- [6/24/2015 4:54:33 PM] Markku: good
- [6/24/2015 4:54:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: and then as he stood there reading and fuming, she went off to be lesbians
- [6/24/2015 4:55:07 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yesssss
- [6/24/2015 4:55:33 PM] Markku: nowadays rhythm would probably hand it off to desaul and then immediately start flirting with him just to make things weird
- [6/24/2015 4:55:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: .....even better omg
- [6/24/2015 4:56:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: The Triforce grants wishes, does it not? We could find that and simply wish all temples beaten. Simple. Esaul replied. Desaul was standing back up, but barely.
- or. OR. Or.
- [6/24/2015 4:56:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: Even simpler.
- [6/24/2015 4:56:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: YOU JUST WISH YOURSELF ALIVE.
- [6/24/2015 4:57:59 PM] Flareth Sexbang: fuck
- [6/24/2015 4:58:03 PM] Flareth Sexbang: anyway brb
- [6/24/2015 4:58:03 PM] Flareth Sexbang: dinner
- [6/24/2015 4:58:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: okay
- [6/24/2015 4:58:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: we will wait for you
- [6/24/2015 4:58:15 PM] Markku: yes
- [6/24/2015 5:11:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: hoo boy
- [6/24/2015 5:11:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: coloring done
- [6/24/2015 5:11:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: now to shade
- [6/24/2015 5:13:12 PM] Markku: oh boy
- [6/24/2015 5:25:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: ooo that's looking good so far
- [6/24/2015 5:25:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: hell ye
- [6/24/2015 5:25:24 PM] Markku: hell ye
- [6/24/2015 5:28:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: 'beef jerky is just meat raisins' i never thought of it this way
- [6/24/2015 5:28:37 PM] Markku: ... fuck
- [6/24/2015 5:28:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: did this fuck you up as bad as it fucked me up
- [6/24/2015 5:31:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: oo flareth is back
- [6/24/2015 5:31:25 PM] Zora Sexbang: kinda
- [6/24/2015 5:31:57 PM] Flareth Sexbang: back
- [6/24/2015 5:32:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: yeeessss
- [6/24/2015 5:32:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: SHALL WE?
- [6/24/2015 5:32:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ye
- [6/24/2015 5:33:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: "It might not have been that. It could've been anything." Zora said, "Besides, I want to help. I'm not going to let you die again. I don't care if I die. I don't really have any family who would care anyway." she looked at the ground, "I can't let you face him alone. Even the greatest of heroes had help."
- ooooh was this back when i was waffling about her family life
- [6/24/2015 5:33:39 PM] Zora Sexbang: i think back in the veeeery first one she was said to have a shit family but that was changed quickly
- [6/24/2015 5:33:54 PM] Flareth Sexbang: you mean this rp
- [6/24/2015 5:33:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: ye
- [6/24/2015 5:34:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: now i have it solid, i think
- [6/24/2015 5:34:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: her dead is DEEEEEAD
- [6/24/2015 5:34:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: .....
- [6/24/2015 5:34:35 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *DAD
- [6/24/2015 5:34:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: she has a good family life, and back when she was doing these adventures, both parents
- [6/24/2015 5:35:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: when she was in college her dad fell ill quickly, and she had to drop out
- [6/24/2015 5:35:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: he died and she didn't go back for a long, long time
- [6/24/2015 5:35:25 PM] Zora Sexbang: she was depressed
- [6/24/2015 5:35:38 PM] Markku: well
- [6/24/2015 5:36:09 PM] Flareth Sexbang: and Jax's mom is an OC of Zora's and her dad let's say
- [6/24/2015 5:36:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: even now she sort of conveniently 'forgets' father's day is a thing around people and when she gets jax or her girlfriend alone she cries on them till she falls asleep
- [6/24/2015 5:36:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: its just like ash's dad
- [6/21/2015 2:02:56 PM] Flareth Sexbang: who inseminated jacqueline
- [6/21/2015 2:03:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: it is simultaneously everyone and no one
- [6/21/2015 2:03:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: schrodinger's dad
- [6/21/2015 2:03:11 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ......that comes out more awkward considering that's my name
- [6/21/2015 2:03:14 PM] Flareth Sexbang: f u c k
- [6/21/2015 2:03:35 PM] Zora Sexbang: nah tho i feel like jax is the only one she trusts with that
- [6/21/2015 2:03:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yeah
- [6/21/2015 2:03:50 PM] Flareth Sexbang: and deax
- [6/21/2015 2:03:53 PM] Zora Sexbang: ye
- [6/24/2015 5:37:01 PM] Flareth Sexbang: it's really sad
- [6/24/2015 5:37:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: Slowly Esaul stood up, then walked toward the wall, head down. When he reached it, he said in a whisper, "He killed my family. Every single one of them. Me and him are the only Estrins left. I want revenge." Esaul seemed to have a blood red aura around him. He clenched his fists.
- falar in the background
- [6/24/2015 5:37:54 PM] Zora Sexbang: 'hey. hey guys. i'm still alive here.'
- [6/24/2015 5:38:21 PM] Markku: there's a lot more Estrins now tbh
- [6/24/2015 5:38:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: and also ripped apparently
- [6/24/2015 5:38:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: ... o:
- [6/24/2015 5:38:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: fite me scrublord
- [6/24/2015 5:38:50 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i'm ripped
- [6/24/2015 5:38:52 PM] Flareth Sexbang: http://kotaku.com/popular-steam-game-offers-100-to-anyone-who-finds-an-e-1713702036
- [6/24/2015 5:39:02 PM] Markku: exact quote from Falar
- [6/24/2015 5:39:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: w e l l
- [6/24/2015 5:40:35 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul replied, "It's your dead bodies and Marshall's. That's why the temple made my head hurt. I was switching through my forms. That's also why I came out as Thorn. I must have come and killed you guys in this realm and I didn't want that to happen in the real world."
- i'm sorry
- [6/24/2015 5:40:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: what
- [6/24/2015 5:40:39 PM] Zora Sexbang: w h a t
- [6/24/2015 5:40:52 PM] Markku: W H A T
- [6/24/2015 5:41:01 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but can you imagine the anguish
- [6/24/2015 5:41:50 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Well, that one's easy. The poem I recited mentions a "Sacred Flower" and there's a forest in...er...ShrekWorld. So we should go there to find the "Sacred Flower."" Esaul answered. "But of course, it's all up to you guys."
- i think far far away is what we officially called it, yes?
- [6/24/2015 5:42:08 PM] Markku: shrek world
- [6/24/2015 5:42:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul disconnected before Zora blacked out and began to examine the temple again. He found a dusty but intact sword. He suddenly recognized it as Falchion. "I would never leave my own sword..." Esaul said in a faint whisper. He heard an evil laugh behind him and felt what seemed like a red-hot whip across his neck. He fell in surprise and was knocked unconscious. The Master Sword lost it's glow.
- ??????????????????????????????????????
- [6/24/2015 5:43:02 PM] Flareth Sexbang: edgey
- [6/24/2015 5:44:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: hey it's the part where zorana learns she's the seventh sage
- [6/24/2015 5:44:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: and now we know who the other six are
- [6/24/2015 5:45:49 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ye
- [6/24/2015 5:46:30 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul awoke in a dark cell. He was chained to the wall by his arms and his wings were tied up. He couldn't see anything, but he heard voices. He relaxed and waited for his fate.
- ...but
- [6/24/2015 5:46:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: you were just
- [6/24/2015 5:46:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: how
- [6/24/2015 5:46:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: how you assdick
- [6/24/2015 5:46:54 PM] Flareth Sexbang: f u c k
- [6/24/2015 5:47:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax whistled. Her dragon came.
- zor in the background winking loudly
- [6/24/2015 5:48:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...brandong doesnt understand that, i realize
- [6/24/2015 5:48:08 PM] Flareth Sexbang: f u c k
- [6/24/2015 5:48:11 PM] Markku: oh
- [6/24/2015 5:48:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: one of my characters is a proud dragon fucker
- [6/24/2015 5:49:16 PM] Markku: oh right
- [6/24/2015 5:49:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul hung there, doing nothing and waiting. He suddenly realized something. He could use telekinisis. Slowly he concentrated on Falchion. It flew out of his sheath and cut the chains hanging him. He grabbed the sword and tried to cut the brackets, but they were too tough. He snuck out of the cell, looked around, and went east.
- i dont think swords can cut chains sir
- [6/24/2015 5:50:10 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ...oh god i'm going to hell for this meme
- [6/24/2015 5:50:17 PM] Flareth Sexbang: jet fuel can't melt steel beams
- [6/24/2015 5:50:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: goes to hell
- [6/24/2015 5:50:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh my god
- [6/24/2015 5:50:50 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul turned and saw someone at the end of the corridor. He ran toward the person, sword in hands. When he reached the person, it turned around. "What the h*ll!?" Esaul yelled. He was face-to-face with himself.
- now neither of you will be virgins!!
- [6/24/2015 5:51:09 PM] Markku: fuck
- [6/24/2015 5:51:20 PM] Flareth Sexbang: wooooooo
- [6/24/2015 5:51:57 PM | Edited 5:52:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul was staring at himself. The clone spread his arms and transformed into Desaul.
- "Surprised?" Desaul asked. Dark Zora and Dark Jax came in sight and stood beside Desaul.
- "We do not want to fight you. We will wait until you are revived." Dark Zora stated.
- Dark Jax said, "But we will not be able to fight you if you die. You are living in the Sacred Realm, but dead in the real world. If you are dead in both, then we will cease to exist."
- Desaul said, "So we have made a vow to help you out of this prison. Don't expect it again." All three of the dark forms pulled out an Extreme Gear.
- "Try to keep up." Desaul said, throwing Esaul one. They sped off. Esaul got on his and followed.
- ah yes i forgot technically you controlled val's very first incarnation
- [6/24/2015 5:52:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: also: what's an extreme gear
- [6/24/2015 5:52:44 PM] Markku: uh I have no clue tbh
- [6/24/2015 5:53:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: flareth, time to practice google fu and see if its a thing or something he made up
- [6/24/2015 5:53:33 PM] Flareth Sexbang: http://sonic.wikia.com/wiki/Extreme_Gear
- [6/24/2015 5:53:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...
- [6/24/2015 5:53:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: :3c
- [6/24/2015 5:53:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh my god
- [6/24/2015 5:53:51 PM] Markku: oh my goddd
- [6/24/2015 5:54:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul sped through the narrow corridors, barely keeping up with Desaul. He eventually got the hang of it and flew in the middle of the three darks, making a triangle formation. They reached the exit of the prison, but it was surrounded by guards. They stopped and dismounted off the Extreme Gears, drew their weapons, and prepared for battle.
- *chanting* FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT
- [6/24/2015 5:55:35 PM] Flareth Sexbang: bad reputation plays in background
- [6/24/2015 5:55:45 PM] Zora Sexbang: THE CHAIR! GIVE HIM THE CHAIR!
- [6/24/2015 5:56:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: :3
- [6/24/2015 5:56:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: guys i swear to you i will stream it for the anniversary
- [6/24/2015 5:56:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: i will do it
- [6/24/2015 5:57:00 PM] Markku: good
- [6/24/2015 5:57:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I said I did not come here to fight. Are you so engulfed in the light that you cannot hear?" Desaul said. "I merely want to check on Esaul. If I could...?" Desaul pointed at the Master Sword.
- well if you want her modern incarnation, no
- [6/24/2015 5:57:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: quite the opposite
- [6/24/2015 5:58:11 PM] Flareth Sexbang: speaking of anniversaies
- [6/24/2015 5:58:22 PM] Flareth Sexbang: better send a tweet to nsp
- [6/24/2015 5:58:35 PM] Flareth Sexbang: congratsing dan on his second grumpaversary
- [6/24/2015 5:58:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: that's all you
- [6/24/2015 5:59:01 PM] Zora Sexbang: Desaul laughed. "No, no girl, I am not evil. I simply follow the darkness. That does not make a person evil. Take Esaul for example."
- are u sure
- [6/24/2015 5:59:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: are u suuuuuuuuuuuuuure
- [6/24/2015 5:59:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: are u absolutely sure you're not evil
- [6/24/2015 6:00:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: w e l p
- [6/24/2015 6:01:07 PM] Zora Sexbang: you sure are a heel face revolving door
- [6/24/2015 6:01:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul could still hear the others. He connected, but the time he spent doing so made him miss a turn. Esaul looked up to see a stone pillar coming fast at him. He couldn't even take a breath before-"ARRGH!" Esaul yelled, falling a considerable height. He landed with a thud.
- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ytCEuuW2_A
- [6/24/2015 6:02:33 PM] Markku: fuck omg I'm laughing so hard
- [6/24/2015 6:03:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: ~nailed it~
- [6/24/2015 6:03:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i was thinking more along the lines of this
- [6/24/2015 6:03:07 PM] Flareth Sexbang: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3NMAfCnVrE
- [6/24/2015 6:03:16 PM] Flareth Sexbang: :3
- [6/24/2015 6:03:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: naaah, that comes later
- [6/24/2015 6:03:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: you know when
- [6/24/2015 6:03:33 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6/24/2015 6:04:00 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul finally stood up, but fell back down almost instantly. "Great. How am I supposed to beat Marshall now?" Esaul said. He looked around. He seemed to be in a desert of some sort. "Hmm. Oh no." Esaul said, realizing where he was. He was in the Haunted Wasteland.
- *spanish guitars start up*
- [6/24/2015 6:04:22 PM] Flareth Sexbang: perfect
- [6/24/2015 6:04:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: shrek returns
- [6/24/2015 6:05:01 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes good
- [6/24/2015 6:05:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: "You mean this thing?" Shrek dug in his back pocket, then pulled out a some sort of silver fruit. "I found it walking in the forest. We know our way around this place luckily."
- deus ex shrekina
- [6/24/2015 6:06:13 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul sighed. "No. I live in the Sacred Realm. I have a life. I am dead in a different realm. If I die in this realm, then I will not be able to be revived. In other words, I was simply transferred from one realm to the other. Do you get it now?"
- ...
- [6/24/2015 6:06:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: no
- [6/24/2015 6:06:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: all this and they haven't even gotten to duloc yet
- [6/24/2015 6:07:03 PM] Flareth Sexbang: omg
- [6/24/2015 6:07:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul wall-rode up to the top of the ruins to see a race taking place. "Hmm." Esaul said, "It's a bit dangerous. But that's what the racers are racing for I guess." He waited for the race, sitting down. "Hey, there's a convict!" someone yelled, pointing at Esaul. "Wha...?" Esaul was lost for words as he saw others on Gears racing toward him. He jumped on his and sped off.
- but. why is he a convict.
- [6/24/2015 6:07:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: this is never explained.
- [6/24/2015 6:08:11 PM] Flareth Sexbang: trsrockin is working for u right
- [6/24/2015 6:08:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: ye
- [6/24/2015 6:08:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: why is it acting like a butt on my end
- [6/24/2015 6:08:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: because butts
- [6/24/2015 6:08:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul looked back. The followers were gaining on him. He noticed a black object in the distance and grabbed it. He recognized it as a double barrel gun. He hesitated, then shot behind him.
- zor in the background
- [6/24/2015 6:08:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: "hey that's mine :C"
- [6/24/2015 6:10:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul was weak from the crash and only managed to kill one guard. "Any more objections?" the remaining guard asked. Esaul growled. His eyes were turning feral again. No. Restrain it. He couldn't. He broke out of the cuffs, grabbed the guard by the throat, and killed him by using Falchion. He turned back to his normal form and fainted.
- boy you have got issues
- [6/24/2015 6:11:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yeeepppppppp
- [6/24/2015 6:11:16 PM] Markku: always got issues
- [6/24/2015 6:11:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I feel like a Transformer." Jax said, "MOVIES!"
- Jax sat down.
- "I don't feel so good." she moaned.
- ...oh no
- [6/24/2015 6:11:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: this was the year bayformers came out wasnt it
- [6/24/2015 6:11:50 PM] Flareth Sexbang: pllanks
- [6/24/2015 6:11:54 PM] Flareth Sexbang: planks
- [6/24/2015 6:11:54 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ye
- [6/24/2015 6:12:14 PM] Flareth Sexbang: this is the momeent i've been waiting months for isn't it
- [6/24/2015 6:12:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: ?
- [6/24/2015 6:12:24 PM] Flareth Sexbang: nothing
- [6/24/2015 6:12:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: just go om
- [6/24/2015 6:12:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: OH
- [6/24/2015 6:12:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *on
- [6/24/2015 6:12:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: "NO NOT THEM!" Jax cried, "I HATE OSMOSIS JONES! HATRED!"
- [6/24/2015 6:12:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: legendary
- [6/24/2015 6:12:52 PM] Flareth Sexbang: im done
- [6/24/2015 6:13:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: "WHAT???" Zora was lost, "What does that crapTASTIC movie have to do, with ANYTHING???"
- i said, as i actually kind of liked that film
- [6/24/2015 6:13:33 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i said as i was terrified
- [6/24/2015 6:13:46 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i still haven't watched it the whole way through
- [6/24/2015 6:13:59 PM] Flareth Sexbang: 2001 wa the year of movies that scared the shit out of me
- [6/24/2015 6:14:09 PM] Flareth Sexbang: the triforce
- [6/24/2015 6:14:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: "It's a phase. Yell crazy stuff and I guess you feel better or something. I suggest you get going, I don't want to be stuck in here as a criminal any longer than I have to, and especially not in the Dark Desert." Esaul said.
- it sure is buddy
- [6/24/2015 6:14:24 PM] Flareth Sexbang: Shrek (surprisingly, Osmosis Jones, and Monkeybone
- [6/24/2015 6:14:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but yes
- [6/24/2015 6:14:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: bee boop
- [6/24/2015 6:14:46 PM] Flareth Sexbang: upd8 time
- [6/24/2015 6:14:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: ah yes
- [6/24/2015 6:16:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: done
- [6/24/2015 6:16:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: not yet
- [6/24/2015 6:17:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh my god
- [6/24/2015 6:17:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: plot twist
- [6/24/2015 6:17:46 PM] Flareth Sexbang: done
- [6/24/2015 6:17:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: it was not, in fact, a denizen
- [6/24/2015 6:18:03 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but yes
- [6/24/2015 6:18:05 PM] Flareth Sexbang: let's not spoil
- [6/24/2015 6:18:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: anyway
- [6/24/2015 6:18:11 PM] Zora Sexbang: lets do this
- [6/24/2015 6:18:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I will haunt you for the rest of your life!" Dark Zora yelled, and she tried to slash Zora.
- because you are literally her twin sister
- [6/24/2015 6:19:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: u ride together u die together
- [6/24/2015 6:19:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: omg
- [6/24/2015 6:21:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: "And besides, the world pretty much hates me..."
- no zorana i'm pretty sure you got the best deal out of all these clowns
- [6/24/2015 6:21:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: successful band
- [6/24/2015 6:21:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: top of your class
- [6/24/2015 6:21:21 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6/24/2015 6:21:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: hot girlfriend
- [6/24/2015 6:21:45 PM] Zora Sexbang: then again this was like her emo phase
- [6/24/2015 6:22:30 PM] Zora Sexbang: "You could destroy him. You are infested with light and have the potential to kill something dark."
- Zorana: I'm not gonna kill Super Super Gay sorry.
- [6/24/2015 6:22:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: Also: why is it always 'infested' with light?
- [6/24/2015 6:23:05 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh
- [6/24/2015 6:23:50 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul awoke to the singing. "Oh come ON! Are you guys trying to kill me or something?" Esaul asked Zora.
- rude
- [6/24/2015 6:24:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: dont you know rhythm
- [6/24/2015 6:24:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: she's the lead singer of her band
- [6/24/2015 6:24:14 PM] Flareth Sexbang: makes all the girls
- [6/24/2015 6:24:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: she gets your ex to take off her underpants
- [6/24/2015 6:25:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: for brandong's reference: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vqLTC9Aaujc
- [6/24/2015 6:28:41 PM] Markku: what a wonderful song
- [6/24/2015 6:28:45 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul punched, slashed, and kicked his way to victory. He looked off in the distance. He saw a standing tower. He realized that he was in "Babylon Garden..."
- this just in: lil brandong was a saaaaaaanic fan
- [6/24/2015 6:28:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: yes
- [6/24/2015 6:28:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: it is magical
- [6/24/2015 6:28:57 PM] Markku: saaaaaaaanic i was a huge sonic fan
- [6/24/2015 6:28:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes good
- [6/24/2015 6:29:02 PM] Markku: at least sonic riders
- [6/24/2015 6:29:08 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but u never played s06 until recent
- [6/24/2015 6:29:10 PM] Markku: now i realize how shit sonic games are
- [6/24/2015 6:29:11 PM] Markku: yes
- [6/24/2015 6:29:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: like, the first three were a'aight but
- [6/24/2015 6:29:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: jesus did they get bad fast
- [6/24/2015 6:30:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: The person looked over. Esaul looked at his eyes, and he fainted.
- what, did he fuckin' use hypnosis
- [6/24/2015 6:30:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul awoke almost instantly. He saw the person's feet. He hesitantly looked up in the person's eyes, and this time he didn't faint. He saw that the person was carrying a stun gun.
- "Cheapskate." Esaul said, standing up.
- "It was an accident, alright? Jeez, can't please some people around this place."
- Esaul stood silently, then asked, "What is your name?"
- "Sarah. What's it to you?" The person replied.
- "You stuck up here too?"
- "Yes. Yes I am. And I hate to admit it, but I need help."
- "Then follow me. Do you have an Extreme Gear?"
- Sarah looked astonished. "Yes I do. Why?"
- "You'll need it." Esaul hopped on his and sped off. Sarah hesitantly followed.
- HEY LOOK WHO IT IS
- [6/24/2015 6:31:13 PM] Markku: saraaaah
- [6/24/2015 6:31:21 PM] Markku: boy has she changed
- [6/24/2015 6:31:26 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh?
- [6/24/2015 6:31:40 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6/24/2015 6:31:48 PM] Markku: her name's sariah now, for one
- [6/24/2015 6:32:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: ah
- [6/24/2015 6:32:34 PM] Markku: two she's not nearly as bitchy as i made her seem in this
- [6/24/2015 6:32:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: ... o:
- [6/24/2015 6:32:48 PM] Markku: she's a fuckin nerd now tbh
- [6/24/2015 6:32:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: gooooodddddddd
- [6/24/2015 6:33:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: heeeeeee
- [6/24/2015 6:33:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Zora! What's happening?" Esaul stopped. Sarah was going too fast and smacked straight into a building. Esaul couldn't help but snicker.
- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ytCEuuW2_A
- [6/24/2015 6:34:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: And indeed it was. Right in front of her, the Triforce of Power. The very thing she'd been deemed "Most Likely to Obtain" in her group of friends.
- oh same
- [6/24/2015 6:34:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: what you think i'm not the ganon
- [6/24/2015 6:34:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: i am
- [6/24/2015 6:34:25 PM] Flareth Sexbang: woooooooooooo
- [6/24/2015 6:35:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: (Miyamoto said it, so I guess you should make something up.)
- wait that's right from the source???
- [6/24/2015 6:35:39 PM] Zora Sexbang: thanks shiggy you piled on this whole heap of bullshit
- [6/24/2015 6:36:14 PM] Markku: xD
- [6/24/2015 6:37:01 PM] Flareth Sexbang: good
- [6/24/2015 6:40:02 PM] Flareth Sexbang: hey markky
- [6/24/2015 6:40:07 PM] Flareth Sexbang: going to anime expo this year
- [6/24/2015 6:40:10 PM] Markku: no sadly
- [6/24/2015 6:40:15 PM] Markku: didn't scrounge up the money
- [6/24/2015 6:40:24 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh
- [6/24/2015 6:40:32 PM] Flareth Sexbang: it was just because suzy and holly are gonna be there
- [6/24/2015 6:40:41 PM] Markku: sobs
- [6/24/2015 6:40:53 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i know
- [6/24/2015 6:43:12 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but ues
- [6/24/2015 6:43:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: okay sorry i went to fetch dinner
- [6/24/2015 6:43:45 PM] Markku: delicious dinner
- [6/24/2015 6:43:51 PM] Flareth Sexbang: it fine
- [6/24/2015 6:43:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: *king harkinian voice*
- [6/24/2015 6:44:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: pomg g
- [6/24/2015 6:45:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *pmg
- [6/24/2015 6:45:08 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *omg
- [6/24/2015 6:45:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: why did i always type 'beta' in allcaps
- [6/24/2015 6:45:23 PM] Flareth Sexbang: homestuck in the distance
- [6/24/2015 6:45:45 PM] Zora Sexbang: I play the Ocarina of Dreams. Don't make me get into details. Esaul's Gear started to sputter. Great. My Gear's outta air.
- ?????????????
- [6/24/2015 6:45:52 PM] Flareth Sexbang: o h
- [6/24/2015 6:46:18 PM] Markku: welp
- [6/24/2015 6:46:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...well zorana, you got the triforce, you got to wish on it
- [6/24/2015 6:46:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: and ya blew it
- [6/24/2015 6:47:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: although
- [6/24/2015 6:47:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: 'three goddesses' no, there are only two
- [6/24/2015 6:47:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: demigoddesses tho
- [6/24/2015 6:47:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: hmmmm
- [6/24/2015 6:48:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: (talking bbl canon and not zelda canon, mind)
- [6/24/2015 6:48:57 PM] Zora Sexbang: ....jax apparently got the Courage piece???
- [6/24/2015 6:49:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: well jax u are link now
- [6/24/2015 6:49:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: u are the hero of rhyme
- [6/24/2015 6:49:51 PM] Flareth Sexbang: f u c k
- [6/24/2015 6:51:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Yup, sure." Zora's eyes began to glow as she gained a sense of where the deed was, "Alright. We're ready to go in."
- but how
- [6/24/2015 6:51:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: how zorana.
- [6/24/2015 6:51:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: dont ask
- [6/24/2015 6:51:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: (Make Donkey more annoying. hmmm...Maybe some body switches.)
- ...squints loudly
- [6/24/2015 6:52:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: we havent had a body swap episode in a very long time
- [6/24/2015 6:52:45 PM] Flareth Sexbang: heh
- [6/24/2015 6:52:53 PM] Flareth Sexbang: was that a secret kink of mine idk
- [6/24/2015 6:53:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: i always thought those were fun
- [6/24/2015 6:53:47 PM] Flareth Sexbang: they were
- [6/24/2015 6:53:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: they totes were
- [6/24/2015 6:56:00 PM] Zora Sexbang: just let me give you this scenario:
- [6/24/2015 6:56:07 PM] Zora Sexbang: pick one of your characters.
- [6/24/2015 6:56:25 PM] Flareth Sexbang: me?
- [6/24/2015 6:56:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: Oh okay
- [6/24/2015 6:56:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: uh
- [6/24/2015 6:56:30 PM] Flareth Sexbang: Felix
- [6/24/2015 6:56:39 PM] Zora Sexbang: this is a hypothetical flareth
- [6/24/2015 6:56:52 PM] Markku: i choose my felix
- [6/24/2015 6:56:53 PM] Markku: oh
- [6/24/2015 6:57:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: said character wakes up one morning in the body of a 5'1" brazilian girl sleeping naked on top of a dragon. they feel very, very high.
- [6/24/2015 6:57:24 PM | Edited 6:57:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: what do they do.
- [6/24/2015 6:57:32 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh my god
- [6/24/2015 6:57:46 PM] Flareth Sexbang: well felix always sleeps naked
- [6/24/2015 6:57:53 PM] Flareth Sexbang: if u catch me drift
- [6/24/2015 6:57:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: kek
- [6/24/2015 6:58:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: and what, pray tell, does brandong's felix do
- [6/24/2015 6:59:41 PM] Markku: sit there for a good four minutes screaming internally and being too terrified to even think about moving before realizing he has breasts and there goes his focus
- [6/24/2015 6:59:51 PM] Flareth Sexbang: boobs
- [6/24/2015 6:59:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: omfg
- [6/24/2015 7:00:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: meanwhile this character is probably waving her dick at passing cars in this hypothetical
- [6/24/2015 7:01:32 PM] Flareth Sexbang: and in my Felix, maybe having sex
- [6/24/2015 7:01:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: probably
- [6/24/2015 7:01:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: yeah
- [6/24/2015 7:03:30 PM] Zora Sexbang: 'wait, where did my hot latin tan go. where did my tits go. I HAVE A DONG HOLY SHIT brb waving it at traffic'
- [6/24/2015 7:04:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: or
- [6/24/2015 7:04:54 PM] Zora Sexbang: 'wait a minute, dude. I HAVE SKITTLE HAIR. i can get HELLA LAID WITH THIS.'
- [6/24/2015 7:05:05 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6/24/2015 7:05:09 PM] Markku: glorious
- [6/24/2015 7:05:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: anyway
- [6/24/2015 7:05:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: back to the liveblog
- [6/24/2015 7:06:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...wait
- [6/24/2015 7:06:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: i think i know this reference
- [6/24/2015 7:06:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: hm
- [6/24/2015 7:06:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: hey flareth you'll get this reference now
- [6/24/2015 7:06:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: Later that night, Zora woke up with a full bladder. She walked to the temple's bathroom, since there was nothing else in there, or so she thought. She lit a candle and peed.
- When she got out of the toilet, Zora walked over to the sink and turned the faucet on. Nothing came out. She realized something, having seen a certain movie about a million times. She checked the faucet.
- "No way..." she said to herself, before walking out and laying down, figuring Jax would want to know about this. She fell asleep again.
- [6/24/2015 7:07:02 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6/24/2015 7:07:03 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes i do
- [6/24/2015 7:07:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora pointed to a small carving on the backside of the faucet.
- HMMMMM
- [6/24/2015 7:07:24 PM] Flareth Sexbang: HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
- [6/24/2015 7:08:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: "The place we're supposed to go. Just relax. You'll be fine. Me on the other hand..." Zora pulled out the pencil and drew a mason jar full of beer.
- "Want some?"
- ...okay sure zorana
- [6/24/2015 7:08:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: you're only 15
- [6/24/2015 7:08:11 PM] Zora Sexbang: fine
- [6/24/2015 7:08:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: have a drink
- [6/24/2015 7:08:36 PM] Flareth Sexbang: jax calls her out on this
- [6/24/2015 7:08:53 PM] Flareth Sexbang: imagine if we actually went to hogwarts thp
- [6/24/2015 7:08:55 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *tho
- [6/24/2015 7:09:01 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh man
- [6/24/2015 7:09:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: once i realized you'd never read the thing i never went any further with it
- [6/24/2015 7:09:27 PM] Markku: i would do my best to shape my wand like a dong
- [6/24/2015 7:09:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: yes good
- [6/24/2015 7:10:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: i'd like to apologize retroactively for making you be The Shrek
- [6/24/2015 7:10:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: no
- [6/24/2015 7:10:43 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ni i dont
- [6/24/2015 7:10:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *no
- [6/24/2015 7:11:49 PM] Markku: pfft
- [6/24/2015 7:12:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: "There's the temple." Jax said, pointing, and dropping Donkey "Hm..."
- She noticed some writing.
- Evil is beckoning
- All and All
- In order to stop impending doom
- You will Have to be the one most like you
- (It means...BODYSWITCHING
- Jax-Shrek
- Zora-Donkey
- Zed-Esaul
- Esaul-Zed)
- Zorana: I am /not/ Donkey. The little stoner, she's the annoying talking animal, not me
- [6/24/2015 7:13:10 PM] Flareth Sexbang: omg yes
- [6/24/2015 7:13:28 PM] Markku: welp
- [6/24/2015 7:16:00 PM] Flareth Sexbang: brb
- [6/24/2015 7:16:25 PM] Zora Sexbang: my lord this has been a ride so far
- [6/24/2015 7:16:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: and we're not even halfway through
- [6/24/2015 7:16:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: still not as much of a ride as the spinoff tho
- [6/24/2015 7:16:45 PM] Zora Sexbang: now /that/ was bonkers
- [2:14:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: HEY FLARETH DONGER IS HERE
- [2:15:11 PM] Flareth Sexbang: YAY
- [2:15:20 PM] Markku: YAY
- [2:15:45 PM] Flareth Sexbang: SO SHALL WE GO ON
- [2:16:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: IS EVERYONE UP
- [2:16:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: FOR SOME
- [2:16:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: SHENANIGANS
- [2:16:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: I SURE AM
- [2:16:13 PM] Flareth Sexbang: YEEEEEEEEEE
- [2:16:32 PM] Markku: YEEEEEE
- [2:16:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: LEMME JUST QUEUE US UP
- [2:16:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: WE LEFT OFF ON PAGE 53
- [2:16:55 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yessss
- [2:17:26 PM] Zora Sexbang: HERE WE GO
- [2:17:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: RIGHT FROM THE TOP
- [2:17:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora was still kicking her old body, in an attempt to get back into it.
- i don't think thats how it works
- [2:18:01 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ffffffffffffff
- [2:18:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I don't think that's gonna work..." Zed sadly said, watching Zora kicking her old body.
- see zed feels me
- [2:18:32 PM] Flareth Sexbang: omg
- [2:18:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zed grabbed a pencil and drawn a door to a graveyard, and a book, entitled "Crazy Weird Graveyard Magic With Stuff About Making Souls Changing Body And Such" "Happy?" Zed asked.
- i'd read this
- [2:19:07 PM] Markku: same
- [2:19:16 PM] Flareth Sexbang: me too
- [2:19:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Cool, graves!" Zed approached one "Aaaauuughhh! There's my n...name on it!" He said, extremely scared.
- ...oh
- [2:20:04 PM] Flareth Sexbang: w e l l
- [2:20:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora tried to clear her mind, but was faced by a pale, ghostly midget.
- "Who are you?"
- oh
- [2:20:17 PM] Flareth Sexbang: fuck me
- [2:20:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: look guys
- [2:20:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: it's
- [2:20:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: farquaad's star squad
- [2:20:39 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh my god
- [2:21:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Oh, really?" Farquaad snapped, and with a poof, two others appeared. One looked like some old woman with a wand and wings, and the other was...
- "Ooh, he's hawt." Zora said.
- zorana no
- [2:21:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: he's a douche
- [2:21:50 PM] Zora Sexbang: he made two extra movies happen
- [2:22:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ...oh my fucking god
- [2:22:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: well the 4th movie isn't his fault
- [2:22:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: blame 3 on him
- [2:23:01 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but not 3
- [2:23:03 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *4
- [2:23:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: "You...are a donkey." Jax said, "You have no chance."
- no, but she can call the dragon
- [2:23:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: (if zor didnt fuck it first)
- [2:23:20 PM] Flareth Sexbang: omg
- [2:23:27 PM] Markku: pfft
- [2:23:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Just swing Donkey!" Jax yelled, fighting the three.
- [2:24:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...*deep inhale*
- [2:24:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: THEN I SWUNG MY HORSE LIKE A CLUB
- [2:24:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: AND IT CAUSED A SONIC BOOM
- [2:24:24 PM] Flareth Sexbang: f u c k
- [2:24:27 PM] Markku: gdi
- [2:24:30 PM] Zora Sexbang: THAT RUPTURED SPACE AND THEN EXPLODED THE SUN
- [2:25:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: Fairy Godmother screamed, firing a spell at Zora, turning her into a human again by mistake.
- "New wand, eh? Well, I'm still male, but this'll do!!" She swiped the Sword out of Donkey's hands, and swung wildly. Donkey took out the bow and aimed awkwardly.
- real talk zorana would be bangin as a dude
- [2:25:29 PM] Markku: hell yes
- [2:25:46 PM] Flareth Sexbang: y e
- [2:26:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Gyehahaha!!!" Zora forced the Sword through his throat, killing him
- ...o h
- [2:26:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: are we /sure/ zorana didnt have a berserker at this point
- [2:26:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: .......she had to have had one
- [2:27:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: and she had no idea what it was she just assumed she was a fuckin werewolf
- [2:27:24 PM] Markku: snort
- [2:27:30 PM] Flareth Sexbang: perfect
- [2:27:35 PM] Zora Sexbang: .............she's not wrong
- [2:28:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: The Fairy Godmother died. Suddenly, a wind blew and they were back in their bodies.
- well that was to the point
- [2:28:23 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yep
- [2:28:57 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Mkay. I'm gonna train with this swo-OW!" Esaul said, cutting himself with his sword. "What the heck? I never do that..."
- are u sure, mr. linkin park song
- [2:29:00 PM] Zora Sexbang: absolutely sure
- [2:29:29 PM] Flareth Sexbang: w e l p
- [2:29:31 PM] Markku: fun fact i cut myself with a rubber sword
- [2:29:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...OH
- [2:29:36 PM] Flareth Sexbang: how
- [2:30:21 PM] Markku: i was using it as a prop for a scene in acting class and during the fight it somehow got an edge to it and cut me
- [2:30:32 PM] Markku: i was so confused but i went on with the scene
- [2:30:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: you're a trooper
- [2:31:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Fine. Still that's unnatural." Esaul replied. "I usually have better swordplay."
- as our resident sword-ghost is quick to remind her pupils, everyone gets careless
- [2:31:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [2:32:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Just relax." Zora called to them. She turned to the faucet.
- "Open." Zora said. Nothing happened. She cleared her throat.
- "OPEN." She said, not noticing that it was in a freaky language. The wall behind the sink began to open.
- ...this just in: apparently zorana is a fucking parseltongue now
- [2:32:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ......w e l p
- [2:33:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: i mean there's probably a lot of heirs of slytherin out there, voldemort isn't special
- [2:33:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: but still
- [2:33:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: like there's never just /one/ heir after that long
- [2:33:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: thats not how family trees work
- [2:34:03 PM] Markku: thing is, though
- [2:34:25 PM] Markku: we can use magic as an explantion in that world and no one questions it
- [2:34:35 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...got me there
- [2:35:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: https://twitter.com/ninjasexparty/status/614514687229607936
- [2:35:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: f u c k nsp ur perfetc
- [2:35:49 PM] Flareth Sexbang: p e r fect
- [2:36:00 PM] Markku: fuck omg
- [2:36:01 PM] Markku: thank
- [2:36:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: gods bless NSP
- [2:36:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: thank u
- [2:37:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Yeah." Jax said, "Really...I really don't have any friends, except for those guys."
- Jax motioned to Zora and Zed.
- "Oh yeah...and my toxic farts." Jax said.
- ...jax
- [2:37:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: if your farts are sentient enough to be friends
- [2:37:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: we have
- [2:37:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: a problem
- [2:37:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: jax no
- [2:37:59 PM] Flareth Sexbang: the fact that she has space magic tho
- [2:38:10 PM] Flareth Sexbang: she could do that if she wanted to
- [2:38:19 PM] Flareth Sexbang: sAVE ME
- [2:38:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: OH NO
- [2:38:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Brutal much?" Shrek asked. Donkey had finally freed himself and yelled, "YOU KILLED WOLVES!!! ANIMAL CRUELTY! ANIMAL CRUELTY!!!"
- shut up donkey
- [2:38:54 PM] Flareth Sexbang: so in character
- [2:39:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: "It was in a video game I'm obsessed with." Zora explained, "I'm surprised to see that it's the exact same as in the game, actually."
- SO AM I
- [2:39:29 PM] Zora Sexbang: let me tell you when i run that fifth installment
- [2:39:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: the dungeons will most certainly not be the same
- [2:40:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: dear: past self
- [2:40:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: stop handing out vidya advice in an RP
- [2:40:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: "So we're gonna grow. AWESOME!" Jax shouted.
- not like that jax
- [2:40:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: not like that
- [2:41:25 PM] Flareth Sexbang: Jax: D:
- [2:41:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: grow up, is what they meant
- [2:41:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: and you did!
- [2:41:52 PM] Flareth Sexbang: Jax: :D
- [2:41:53 PM] Zora Sexbang: but not like in the game
- [2:42:30 PM] Zora Sexbang: There were some random Koopas. Jax jumped on them to get to the door.
- random-ass koopers
- [2:42:46 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yep
- [2:42:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: imagine: a mario bootleg world
- [2:43:04 PM] Flareth Sexbang: grand dad
- [2:43:22 PM] Flareth Sexbang: imagine: a corruption world
- [2:43:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh maaaan
- [2:44:07 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora sighed as she opened the door, "OK, now see those torches?" she pointed to four torches surrounding an elevator. One was normal, one was blue, one was green, and the last was purple.
- hello ladies
- [2:44:07 PM] Flareth Sexbang: that would be hella cool and creepy tbh
- [2:44:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: those ghosts got character development, brandong
- [2:44:38 PM] Markku: aww yiss
- [2:44:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: they really, really did
- [2:44:53 PM] Zora Sexbang: let's see if i remember their motifs
- [2:45:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: they all fell into different portals at different times, in different parts of the world, and ended up dying
- [2:46:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: the way i drew them back then reflects where they're from and when they're from
- [2:46:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: The one that follows the original group in BBL around was the red one. She was from ancient Japan, a traveler who was stolen away by youkai
- [2:48:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: The second, who follows around a new group of characters, is the green one
- [2:48:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: She's a famous outlaw from the old west who hid her riches in a vast system of caves. She came through starving after getting lost in those same caves.
- [2:49:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: The other two who haven't gotten to follow anyone around are the purple and blue ones
- [2:49:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: The purple one is a princess from the middle ages, who ran from her castle one night and never returned
- [2:50:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: And the blue one is from the modern day middle east, she got lost in a sandstorm and was never found
- [2:50:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: She can't even speak English yet
- [2:50:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [2:50:34 PM] Markku: good god that's a lot of lore
- [2:50:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: yeah
- [2:50:39 PM] Markku: but that's fuckin awesome
- [2:50:49 PM] Flareth Sexbang: lore is good
- [2:51:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: I should give them some updated art
- [2:52:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: The green one is my favorite, I think
- [2:52:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: She has the most 'active' personality out of them
- [2:52:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: And she's never just satisfied to play the guide and hang back.
- [2:52:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: She gets in there and fights with her heroes.
- [2:53:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: She has a ghost rifle, even. It shoots spirit bullets.
- [2:54:29 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...Anyway though
- [2:54:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: More loredumps later
- [2:54:35 PM] Zora Sexbang: Let's riff
- [2:54:45 PM] Markku: riffraff motherfuckers
- [2:54:53 PM] Zora Sexbang: Suddenly, four female ghosts appeared, giggling, and lit their own torches with the flames, and the big ones went out.
- and there they go
- [2:54:57 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yesssss
- [2:55:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Hmm..maybe we'll find some of those mushrooms." Jax said.
- jax no
- [2:55:46 PM] Flareth Sexbang: fuc
- [2:55:47 PM] Flareth Sexbang: k
- [2:56:01 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...man unk was going mario 64 right here
- [2:56:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: i have never played mario 64
- [2:56:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: also: can you feel the arin rage
- [2:56:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: i can
- [2:56:21 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [2:56:42 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh good i made cum
- [2:56:47 PM] Flareth Sexbang: (fr reference markku)
- [2:56:58 PM] Markku: o-oh
- [2:56:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: Oh, wait no. Paper Mario.
- [2:57:09 PM] Flareth Sexbang: there's this thing
- [2:57:15 PM] Flareth Sexbang: and it looks exactly like cum
- [2:57:22 PM] Markku: welp
- [2:57:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Let me explain. The Toy Box has Shy Guys that are on fire! Plus some Anti Guy dude." Zed explained.
- w-why are they on fire
- [2:57:39 PM] Flareth Sexbang: anti guy dude
- [2:58:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: http://8tracks.com/antipathiczora/x-a-step-into-an-anniversary-playlist oh also
- [2:58:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: Something to listen to during this riff
- [2:58:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ah yes good
- [2:59:00 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh brandong
- [2:59:13 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i should show you this too
- [2:59:14 PM] Flareth Sexbang: http://8tracks.com/flareth/we-re-so-miserable-and-stunning
- [2:59:26 PM] Flareth Sexbang: :3c
- [2:59:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but yeah
- [2:59:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: listen to that booping bbl playlist
- [3:00:00 PM] Markku: delightful
- [3:00:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: it was fun looking for remixes for these
- [3:00:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: i still need to do one for 3
- [3:00:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: (don't ask why i made a rhythm/opal mix i don't know)
- [3:00:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ye
- [3:01:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Here are we! Hey, there IS a save block! Let me hit it!" Zed said. Then proceeded to punch the save block.
- explain to me how saving would even work???
- [3:01:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i have no idea
- [3:01:54 PM] Markku: if the thread ever got deleted at least we'd have a save point
- [3:02:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: omfg
- [3:02:13 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh my god
- [3:03:01 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Ok... now, to beat me, you got to blow me!" The Shy Guy taunted.
- o-oh
- [3:03:16 PM] Markku: ...
- [3:03:20 PM] Markku: that wasn't in the gaaaame
- [3:03:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: uh
- [3:03:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: w h a t
- [3:03:55 PM] Flareth Sexbang: im so
- [3:04:35 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax then began to explain the adventure that started with her shrinking ray.
- ONE YEAR LATER
- [3:04:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: omg
- [3:05:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Zoar. I'll remember that." Shrek said. "Well, Zoar, aren't you supposed to be leading?"
- 'excuse u'
- [3:05:56 PM] Markku: BIRBS HIGH IN THE AIR
- [3:05:58 PM] Markku: ZOARING THROUGH THE SKY
- [3:06:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...oh my god it's this
- [3:06:16 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh
- [3:06:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax found herself in a strange land. She saw an information box with a lever.
- .... :D
- [3:06:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: f u c k
- [3:06:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax pulled the lever. A familiar tune.
- "No!" Jax cried, grabbing her sword.
- "It's the information box from the first." Jax whispered to Zora.
- keks loudly
- [3:07:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: Then came the picture. Zora stuck her finger up her nose at the last minute.
- things she would still do
- [3:07:26 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [3:07:29 PM] Flareth Sexbang: perfect
- [3:08:13 PM] Zora Sexbang: "FLYING ICECREAM!!!!" Shrek yelled. "Urrgh...Sorry aftereffects." He jumped up. "Who's back?"
- and if i'm wrong, let me be struck by......... A FLYING ICE CREAM TRUCK
- [3:08:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: (AND LIVE)
- [3:08:45 PM] Flareth Sexbang: headcanon: shrek likes spongebob
- [3:08:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: Suddenly, knights surrounded them.
- "I'll take care of them." Jax said.
- She started to slash widly.
- guys. guys it's finally here.
- [3:08:56 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [3:08:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: [BAD REPUTATION PLAYS LOUDLY IN THE BACKGROUND]
- [3:09:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G9VSGPmkUc0
- [3:09:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: thank
- [3:09:37 PM] Markku: thank
- [3:09:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh it's 4th on the playlist anyway
- [3:09:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: WELP
- [3:10:24 PM] Flareth Sexbang: perfect
- [3:10:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: GIVE EM THE CHAIR ZED
- [3:11:04 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yesssssssssssssssssss
- [3:11:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zed followed Zora to the ring "I love wrestling, I watch it when I can! CHAAARGE!" Zed said. He then slammed everyone in his way.
- GIVE EM THE C H A I R
- [3:11:50 PM] Flareth Sexbang: go zed!
- [3:12:15 PM] Zora Sexbang: [fight scene commences]
- [3:12:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: Soon, all the knights were vanquished. Jax ran to Shrek, extending her blade to Farquaad neck.
- and then murder happened
- [3:13:08 PM] Flareth Sexbang: y e p
- [3:13:11 PM] Zora Sexbang: Meanwhile, Zed was looking at the left when a fammiliar face appeared...
- "Hey, the Shedinja again!" He said.
- O:
- [3:13:17 PM] Flareth Sexbang: sheddy
- [3:15:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Yep! Seeing as, at least in the games, he's a ghost himself!" Zed happily said "It also may lead me to cool glasses."
- priorities
- [3:15:22 PM] Markku: priorities are right
- [3:15:24 PM] Flareth Sexbang: best
- [3:15:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: "It's moving fast. I should try..." Zora FINALLY made HERSELF one of those dragons. It was purple with red wings and golden everything else.
- "Get on!"
- so is this like
- [3:15:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: proto-tempest
- [3:16:03 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [3:16:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Hey, I'm gonna put a music that fits here." UnkNown said. Cipher Peon Battle music started to play.
- ...oh okay
- [3:16:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: perfect
- [3:16:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: The dragon landed in a clearing. Right in the middle of it, staring at them, was the first ghost.
- "So... You've finally found me... Heehee... Then let's see you beat me!" She began to twirl at them.
- jesus akane calm the fuck down
- [3:17:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: Then Wind of Darkness flew in, gave the ghost a good whacking, screamed something about pie, slapped Zora, and followed the other two.
- "Owww..." Zora whined as she slashed the ghost.
- [3:17:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: jesus me calm the fuck down
- [3:18:07 PM] Flareth Sexbang: calm down ur random
- [3:18:10 PM] Flareth Sexbang: check ur priviledge
- [3:18:17 PM] Flareth Sexbang: (intentionay mispelled)
- [3:19:01 PM] Zora Sexbang: Suddenly, Batman came and attacked.
- ---
- "OK, this is getting wierd." Zora said. Then three more ghosts came floating in.
- "To get your precious flames back, you must beat every one of us." They said in unison, "Including Wind of Darkness, Batman, and Flareth."
- [arin's alfred impression voice] BATMAN
- [3:19:42 PM] Flareth Sexbang: omg
- [3:19:47 PM] Markku: snort
- [3:20:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: This was the real one. A shreik was heard, and the ghosts disappeared.
- "Excellent." The red ghost who was still left said, "Now we can put fire on the torches again."
- i found it
- [3:20:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: the exact point akane became the guide ghost
- [3:21:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: (brandong: that is her name)
- [3:21:19 PM] Markku: okay xD
- [3:21:20 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [3:21:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Golden...flames.." Jax said, "We have farts if that's what you mean."
- ...bless ur heart jax
- [3:21:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: bless ur heart
- [3:21:45 PM] Flareth Sexbang: j a x
- [3:23:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: "IS THAT A FLOATING PIE??!!" Zora screamed, pointing to where the pie once was, now an empty space.
- one of these days, i am going to learn how to hologram for april fools
- [3:23:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: and just follow you around making floating pies appear everywhere
- [3:24:10 PM] Flareth Sexbang: pls do
- [3:24:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: The dragon started to descend. It suddenly changed place.
- "A castle... another... trees, worms... crates, bazookas... The Worms World!" Zed said.
- ...had anyone even played these besides him?
- [3:24:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: like at least i had brandong back in the day with the assload of OoT
- [3:25:07 PM] Flareth Sexbang: n o
- [3:25:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: and only now will i have flareth when she actually beats the game
- [3:25:39 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ye
- [3:25:53 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Hmm... Must've taken a wrong turn..." Zora muttered, "We were supposed to turn LEFT at the sign for Albequerque, weren't we?"
- *chews on carrot*
- [3:26:02 PM] Flareth Sexbang: what's up doc
- [3:26:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: "OK, tell me what to do." Zora said.
- "In order to get back to the Mushroom Kingdom and ultimately the Forest Temple, you will pass through several locations not there when you came this way the first time. These will disappear once you are through with them." the ghost explained.
- ...i think in all my railroading i tried to incorporate you guys
- [3:27:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: which is sweet of me i guess
- [3:27:13 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [3:27:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Cool, Michigan!" Zed said.
- .............????????????????????????????????????????????????????
- [3:27:25 PM] Markku: ???????????
- [3:27:26 PM] Flareth Sexbang: michigan
- [3:27:47 PM] Flareth Sexbang: M I C H I G A N
- [3:28:01 PM] Markku: also if i don't respond for the next five minutes it's because i have a long ass reply to an RP i'm doing
- [3:28:07 PM] Markku: i'm still here i promise
- [3:28:12 PM] Flareth Sexbang: OK
- [3:28:14 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh fuck
- [3:28:19 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i forgot to post
- [3:28:57 PM] Flareth Sexbang: trsrockin slowly loads for no reason
- [3:29:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: come ON LOAD
- [3:30:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora felt... Somewhat cooler. She looked around.
- These clouds are shaped like flowers... she thought.
- *inhale*
- [3:30:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: ARE YA READY KIDS
- [3:30:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: OKay there we go
- [3:30:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: AYE AYE CAPTAIN
- [3:30:39 PM] Zora Sexbang: I CANT HEAR YOUUUUUUU
- [3:31:01 PM] Zora Sexbang: okay sorry
- [3:31:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: anyway
- [3:31:30 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax looked around.
- "Flower..Flower Flower...BUCKET!" Jax screamed.
- why am i reminded of the... was it the hamster dance?
- [3:31:39 PM] Zora Sexbang: something something badger badger badger snake
- [3:31:45 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ah the badger song
- [3:31:53 PM] Zora Sexbang: thank
- [3:32:12 PM] Flareth Sexbang: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EIyixC9NsLI
- [3:32:24 PM] Flareth Sexbang: :3
- [3:32:29 PM] Zora Sexbang: and that is your ancient meme of the day
- [3:33:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: An ambulance flew past them, followed by a sponge on a bicycle. Zora found it unusual that she could breathe underwater. She looked down. She was pure white, and seemed to shimmer. And on her arms...
- Fins... She thought as she felt her arm. She was scaly.
- "Guys... You may want to make sure if you're still human or not..."
- ah yes of course
- [3:33:21 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but now
- [3:33:21 PM] Flareth Sexbang: http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/262435
- [3:33:25 PM] Flareth Sexbang: this is the mood music
- [3:33:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: yes
- [3:34:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: i really need to draw her and zor in these alternate forms because i bet they are very shiny and pretty
- [3:34:23 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [3:34:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: The voices boomed above jher. Jax saw that everything was taller than her.
- "Omigosh! I'm...a.....plankton!" she cried.
- of course u are
- [3:35:01 PM] Zora Sexbang: At that moment, another small creature walked past.
- "Heeeeeyyyyy, what's your name?"
- Zora found herself cracking up at the sound of it.
- WHY DID I PLAY ALONG
- [3:35:19 PM] Flareth Sexbang: why
- [3:35:30 PM] Flareth Sexbang: he would do that tho
- [3:35:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: just to get the formula
- [3:35:40 PM] Flareth Sexbang: and to get rid of his virginity
- [3:35:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...and we gave him the formula
- [3:35:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: readily
- [3:35:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: so uh
- [3:36:00 PM] Flareth Sexbang: (he's not a virgin anymore)
- [3:36:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: :::::::3
- [3:36:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: "But he's hot." Jax said.
- --
- Zora stared.
- "Uhhh... Sure... Yeah..."
- --
- (Really, I love him)
- See I'm not sure which would have been worse
- [3:36:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: Puss, or Plankton
- [3:36:49 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i ave no idea
- [3:36:51 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *have
- [3:37:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: on the one hand, barbed dicks and joining anya in Cat Fuckers Anonymous meetings
- [3:37:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: on the other
- [3:37:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: you can literally use plankton as a buttplug
- [3:37:36 PM] Markku: wow what a way to come back
- [3:37:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: hello dongr
- [3:38:16 PM] Flareth Sexbang: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lsrw_C7I0s4
- [3:38:24 PM] Flareth Sexbang: sex
- [3:38:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: explains it
- [3:38:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh
- [3:38:32 PM] Flareth Sexbang: the question is
- [3:38:35 PM] Flareth Sexbang: how do you do it
- [3:38:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: jax
- [3:38:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: JAX
- [3:39:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: "If I knew, I'd be telling you. OK, WonderSage Powers, ACTIVATE!!
- The test of Shrek is done,
- And I do hope you had fun,
- But this test is more hard,
- Do not take the path that is wayward,
- The yellow one is who you seek,
- Something big happens at this point in the week." Zora said.
- ???????
- [3:39:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: ????????????????
- [3:39:12 PM] Flareth Sexbang: uh
- [3:39:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: canon: zorana has spongebob's actual autograph on her wall
- [3:39:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: right under the master sword
- [3:40:17 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes perfect
- [3:40:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora recieved the autograph excitedly.
- OK, now, you need him to take you to the abandoned palace. A voice in her head said, You'll need to know where it is for later. Take out your map. Zora obideintly took out her map. On it, every world there was, was displayed.
- Now, do you see the flashing crystal?
- Zora nodded.
- Good. Those crystals will display your current location when they flash.
- i need to actually draw up a map
- [3:40:57 PM] Zora Sexbang: I have something of an idea
- [3:41:50 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I'm a plankton." Jax said, "That Plankton dude is kinda hot. I saw him today."
- flareth no
- [3:42:02 PM] Flareth Sexbang: no
- [3:42:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Apparently to her." Zora said, "Do you know where an abandoned palace is?"
- "The abandoned palace?" Spongebob asked, "Why would you want to go there?"
- "There's something important there."
- ooooOOOOOH I KNOW WHAT PART THIS IS
- [3:42:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: OH BOY
- [3:43:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: A familiar voice came out of nowhere. "Come closer..." it beckoned. It seemed to be male.
- "Yes...come on..." Another familiar voice. This one was a woman's.
- "Don't be scared..." Another woman's voice.
- BUCKLE UP KIDS
- [3:44:26 PM] Flareth Sexbang: w e l l
- [3:44:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: Slow clapping was heard. Desaul stepped out, along with Dark Jax, and the new Dark Zed. But Dark Zora was nowhere to be seen.
- "Well, well. You are smart for not following us into the shadows. I admire you for that." Desaul said. They were now in full view.
- hey look zed FINALLY got some love
- [3:44:39 PM] Zora Sexbang: 73 pages in
- [3:44:59 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yep
- [3:45:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Understood." Zora said. She looked around.
- "But who do I fight?"
- --
- "Your shadow form has been...ah...disposed of. You will have to fight me." Desaul said. The other shadow forms disappeared. Desaul began to teleport Jax and Zed.
- 'disposed of' u mean she got fed up with your bullshit and walked off
- [3:45:57 PM] Zora Sexbang: also: this is a very dangerous matchup
- [3:46:00 PM] Zora Sexbang: fun stuff!
- [3:46:33 PM] Flareth Sexbang: here we go
- [3:46:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Whatever." Zora yawned.
- dude dont sound so bored he can kill ur ass
- [3:48:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: They're at a stalemate
- [3:48:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: Desaul spotted Zed, looked at him, and sneered.
- "You don't know, do you? I am not like your shadow forms. Light doesn't affect me like the others."
- With that, Desaul kicked off of Zed and charged toward Zora.
- bullshit, sir
- [3:48:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora turned and was struck.
- "Nnunn... Can't say it wouldn't happen eventually." Her arm was bleeding profusely, but she didn't care, despite the pain. She launched at him, leaking everywhere.
- but... arm wounds are usually superficial
- [3:49:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: did he
- [3:49:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: literally fucking hit you where that huge shoulder artery is
- [3:49:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: fuckin /ow/
- [3:49:24 PM] Markku: ow indeed
- [3:49:53 PM] Zora Sexbang: Desaul was again struck, and he slid back. He smiled."Time to finish you off." He began to gain glowing red eyes and streaks of blood in his hair.
- ...just... straight up blood
- [3:49:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: i think
- [3:49:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: you should probably
- [3:50:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: see a doctor about that
- [3:50:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: that's not healthy
- [3:51:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zed started saving up another energy ball, but this time, it was special, it had the power of his companions, the persons they met, and his own power.
- [Goku voice] SPIRIT BOMB
- [3:51:15 PM] Flareth Sexbang: posted
- [3:51:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: short but posted
- [3:51:32 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i mean
- [3:51:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: when it loads
- [3:51:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: ye
- [3:52:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: Desaul was struck. He leaned on one knee. Blood was falling down his face. "What...intriguing power..." Desaul whispered, disappearing into darkness.
- Zorana: Yeah. Lick my sack you fucker.
- [3:52:17 PM] Flareth Sexbang: disappearing into darkness u say
- [3:52:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: kinky
- [3:52:25 PM] Markku: f uck
- [3:52:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: oMFG
- [3:52:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: :3c
- [3:52:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora couldn't understand him. She was losing consciousness fast, due to lack of oxygen.
- that is not how any of this works
- [3:53:23 PM] Markku: read that as "lack of orgasm"
- [3:53:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: zora
- [3:53:32 PM] Markku: immediately was like "i feel u zor" but then
- [3:53:33 PM] Flareth Sexbang: can you
- [3:53:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: check to see if the post went through
- [3:53:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: nope
- [3:53:49 PM] Flareth Sexbang: fUCK
- [3:54:01 PM] Zora Sexbang: lack of orgasm tho
- [3:54:03 PM] Flareth Sexbang: FUCKING BULLSHIT
- [3:54:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: omfg
- [3:54:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: flareth its just a post
- [3:54:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: find ur chill
- [3:54:47 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i
- [3:55:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: Dark Zora opened her eyes. They looked exactly like Zora's, instead of the red glowing eyes. Then she disappeared in a flash of blinding light. "Wha...?" Esaul stood there, staring at the spot where she had disappeared. He thought of a song inside his mind.
- When this began...I had nothing to say and now I'm lost in the nothingness of me...I was confused...And I let it all out to find that I'm not the only person with these things in mind...Nothing to lose...Just stuck, hollowing alone, and the fault is my own...
- I know brandong wrote this, but I always interpreted it
- [3:55:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: As Val returning to herself
- [3:55:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: Because she has the same eyes canonically
- [3:57:08 PM] Flareth Sexbang: can we talk about how rhythm is singing linkin park tho
- [3:57:25 PM] Zora Sexbang: rhythm c. 2007 /is/ linkin park
- [3:57:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: he is the embodiment of CRAAAAWLING IN MY SKIIIIN
- [3:57:37 PM] Markku: he is the entire linkin park
- [3:57:40 PM] Flareth Sexbang: the whole fucking band
- [3:57:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: yes
- [3:58:09 PM] Markku: nowadays if someone hurts him he'll probably wanna fuck them
- [3:58:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: .....OH
- [3:58:26 PM] Zora Sexbang: OOOOOH BOY
- [3:58:50 PM] Flareth Sexbang: kinky
- [3:58:54 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...*shoves zor at him* here you'll like this one
- [3:58:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: "what"
- [3:59:15 PM] Markku: snort
- [3:59:38 PM] Markku: yeah he's become quite the masochist
- [3:59:51 PM] Markku: might have something to do with two of his girlfriends turning lesbian
- [3:59:52 PM] Markku: dunno
- [3:59:55 PM] Flareth Sexbang: the post is finally up
- [4:00:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...for each other, even
- [4:00:19 PM] Markku: exactly
- [4:00:37 PM] Markku: fuck i have two characters named Opal Reim
- [4:00:44 PM] Markku: but they're sisters and two different people entirely
- [4:00:50 PM] Markku: one goes by her middle name instead
- [4:00:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: well
- [4:01:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: "...She has a sister? 'S she at least just as hot?"
- [4:01:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: zorana shh get back in the box
- [4:02:03 PM] Markku: she is always sleepy and has a coffee addiction even though coffee doesn't affect her nearly as much as it should
- [4:02:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: so
- [4:02:10 PM] Markku: she can also see the future
- [4:02:11 PM] Zora Sexbang: she's me
- [4:02:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...except that part
- [4:02:29 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [4:02:36 PM] Markku: pffft
- [4:02:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: "This is not right... The hero isn't supposed to die!" Zora yelled angrily, "WHY???" She fell over and cried. She was dead and that was all there was to it. Even the one person who might take her spot was dead. It was all her fault. This might not have happened if she hadn't been so emo earlier.
- "It isn't fair... Why'd it have to be me???"
- ---
- As the song continued in his mind, color slowly began to fill the room. When the song was finished, he looked up. The first thing he saw was a person, sobbing. "What the..." Esaul ran toward the person.
- hey look we did a thing that kind of worked
- [4:04:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul looked around, saw no-one, then cut the pillar cleanly in half. Nothing was behind it. Slowly he put his sword away. "Must have been a trick of the light." He said. A door burst open and a yell of "HALT!" was heard. Esaul looked behind him and saw guards closing in.
- "Fight!" He yelled to Zora, pulling out Falchion.
- [bad reputation]
- [4:04:43 PM] Flareth Sexbang: always
- [4:05:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: "That red ghost from the Forest Temple." Zora explained.
- "Now listen to me. You must both find the next Temple in this realm. This is the next test." the ghost said.
- "So I had to die for it?" Zora asked.
- "I would've had to hurt you worse to get you here had you not gotten hit in the battle."
- ...is that a threat akane
- [4:05:50 PM] Flareth Sexbang: welp
- [4:05:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: "One. We'll have to travel a long ways though. Here." Esaul said, passing Zora an Extreme Gear. "Mind you, that airboard takes a while to get used to." He said, jumping on his own and speeding out the door.
- bad idea bub
- [4:06:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora, now astonished that she had something like that, got on it and tried to move. She fell off.
- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ytCEuuW2_A
- [4:06:57 PM] Markku: that never ceases to make me laugh
- [4:07:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes perfect
- [4:08:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Don't wonder. Believe." Esaul said. He pointed his Gear down and sped down a wall of sand.
- ~inspirational~
- [4:08:32 PM] Markku: rhythm u lil shit
- [4:08:54 PM] Zora Sexbang: "No...This." Esaul said, pushing his hand onto an empty piece of rock. A rumbling was heard. Esaul put his Extreme Gear against a rock and entered through a brand new hole in the mountain.
- did
- [4:08:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: did he just
- [4:09:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: he put a hole in that *BZZZZZZZ*
- [4:09:13 PM] Flareth Sexbang: break a mount
- [4:09:13 PM] Flareth Sexbang: FUCK
- [4:09:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul didn't answer. He drew Spirit Sword, but accidentantly attempted to use it with one hand, bringing his hand down, along with the rest of his body. "Oof." Esaul said, spitting out dirt.
- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ytCEuuW2_A
- [4:10:07 PM] Markku: fuck xD
- [4:10:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: GODDAMNIT
- [4:10:46 PM] Flareth Sexbang: YES ZOR
- [4:10:50 PM] Flareth Sexbang: always
- [4:11:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul kept walking, and eventually turned the sword over and planted it over both of his shoulders at the same time. He bent down, looking ready to attack. Without warning, he slashed off a portion of the wall.
- he put a hole in that-
- [4:11:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: *STAMPEDE OF ELEPHANTS*
- [4:11:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: airhorns
- [4:12:13 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Because that would kill the inscription." Esaul said. Eventually he finished.
- He read it yet again:
- Thou must do yet one more task,
- Gain a Sacred voice.
- "A Sacred voice...?"
- well
- [4:12:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: zorana /is/ the lead singer of her band
- [4:12:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: (she makes all the pretty girls want to dance and take off their underpants)
- [4:12:56 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [4:12:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: perfect
- [4:13:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul was silent for a moment. He paced back and forth, getting annoyed with each step. He eventually caved in, and slashed the entire wall crookedly in half.
- I'm gonna do an impression of you.
- [4:13:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: *chugga chugga chugga chugga baNG BOOM POW PEW*
- [4:13:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: MILLIONS ARE DEAD
- [4:13:53 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ur a tranwreck rhythm
- [4:14:16 PM] Markku: rhythm c. 2007 is a train playing all the linkin park albums that wrecks
- [4:15:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul reassured himself, then said, "Two of them were telling us the name of the songs. Another was telling us that we have to sing, and I believe the other one was telling us that we need the Fire Tunics."
- was it more goddamn linkin park
- [4:15:20 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [4:15:31 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [4:16:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul listened to the song with not much interest. He was too busy thinking about something else...it was as if he was being watched. He tapped the wall behind him. It seemed normal. He relaxed for what seemed like the first time in his life.
- it feels like somebody...........
- [4:16:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: WANTS TO SELL ME SOMETHING
- [4:16:51 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh shit he's onto us
- [4:17:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: He pulled out Spirit and asked Zora, "Should I?"
- Spirit: excuse u
- [4:17:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: omg
- [4:18:09 PM] Markku: omg
- [4:18:35 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul charged his power, then slashed the wall in half. He looked up and yelled, "What are YOU doing here!?"
- Because standing there in the clearing, was the figure of Marshall.
- i'll let Flareth take this one
- [4:19:05 PM] Flareth Sexbang: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b1d7Llx4rm8
- [4:19:14 PM] Flareth Sexbang: :3c
- [4:19:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: thank
- [4:19:42 PM] Markku: best
- [4:20:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul looked at Zora, then back at Marshall, then back at Zora. Eventually, Esaul grabbed Zora's arm and pulled her through the clearing, pushing Marshall away. Marshall stayed silent, and watched Esaul until he was out of sight.
- excuse u he was just standin there being super super gay
- [4:21:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [4:21:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul continued walking, but eventually stopped, clutching his head. "Damn it..." He whispered.
- u ok
- [4:21:35 PM] Zora Sexbang: Slowly Esaul raised his own arm, also bearing a deep scar. "You, Jax, and Zed, I have the injuries of all three of you. So I know what the consequences of fighting are." He slowly got up.
- but how
- [4:22:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ...wow
- [4:23:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: bunch of kinda boring stuff with unk and me
- [4:24:07 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zed made appear a coffee cup and drank it, he knew it was gonna be a long night.
- me too
- [4:24:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i didn't really ge much contro, here did i
- [4:24:35 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *get
- [4:24:52 PM] Flareth Sexbang: it was more focused on zorana and rhythm
- [4:25:25 PM] Zora Sexbang: See the thing seems to be you were barely ever around and never really.. made plot points despite being the rp owner
- [4:25:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: I guess not barely
- [4:25:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: But the dates on the point we're at seem to indicate that in this section you had school
- [4:26:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: And Unk went to bed at really weird times for us
- [4:26:36 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ye probably
- [4:26:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: You did get better
- [4:26:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul continued to play the ocarina, giving no sign that he had heard her. For some reason, he looked...angry.
- ...oh boy
- [4:27:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora examined the rock further. It was translucent and red. It was also oddly shaped. When Zora squinted at it, it kind of looked like a flame.
- ...OH BOY
- [4:27:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: It's time for a nother loredump!
- [4:27:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: These rocks we ended up also massively expanding on
- [4:28:19 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ye
- [4:28:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: let me just get the infographics
- [4:28:29 PM] Zora Sexbang: if photobucket would load
- [4:28:43 PM] Markku: oh man
- [4:31:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: HERE WE GO
- [4:31:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: http://i673.photobucket.com/albums/vv97/AntipathicZora/heart-of-the-flame_zps82822156.png this here's the one Zorana just found
- [4:31:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: In the current scene
- [4:32:40 PM] Markku: oh shit i've read those
- [4:33:01 PM] Zora Sexbang: okay yeah i thought i showed you these
- [4:33:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: Well, to expand further, they appear specifically to 'sages'.
- [4:33:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zorana isn't the Sage of Fire. But she is the Seventh, which probably explains her ability to locate them.
- [4:34:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: That stone in particular goes to a character I think you remember quite well
- [4:34:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: Our actual Sage of Fire is Kit.
- [4:34:58 PM] Markku: aww yiss
- [4:35:11 PM] Markku: i was gonna guess either her or cyndra tbh
- [4:35:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: Cyndra also works, but it's Kit.
- [4:35:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: The other five Sages I don't know if you know yet
- [4:36:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: But sometime you should meet them
- [4:37:39 PM] Zora Sexbang: Anyway, we'll talk about that later
- [4:37:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: Back to the show!
- [4:37:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: you'd like Cameron
- [4:37:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: ESaul stopped playing the ocarina and watched Zora. His hair was now brown and long, and it kept growing and getting lighter.
- ...uh oh
- [4:38:08 PM] Flareth Sexbang: welp
- [4:38:17 PM] Markku: he has become fabio
- [4:38:26 PM] Zora Sexbang: i think we know whats about t- oH MY GOD
- [4:38:40 PM] Flareth Sexbang: OH MY GOD
- [4:39:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Maybe." Esaul said turning around swiftly. Something hit his back, and he reached, expecting to feel something. He found it was his hair. "Er...What the?" He turned back to Zora and asked, "Alright, what did you do?"
- i too get startled by my own hair
- [4:40:01 PM] Markku: dude my hair scares me all the time and it's not even long
- [4:40:07 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Well, th-" Esaul cut off as he noticed the color of his hair was blonde. "Great. I hate blonde. It's evil to me." He said. "Now, you must have had something to do with it." Esaul said, turning back to Zora.
- Spirit: /excuse u/
- [4:40:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: OH MY GOD
- [4:40:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I haven't used any mana since I called the Gear! There's only one more person here, and that's you! It gives me perfectly good reason to think you did it!" Esaul said, his hair now shining white.
- he mad
- [4:40:58 PM] Markku: he real mad
- [4:41:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I don't know any of the crazy stuff that goes in on your head!" Esaul said.
- me either
- [4:41:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Well I didn't. Maybe this is some new sex thing." Zora said.
- ah yes that kink where your hair turns white and you try to kill everyone
- [4:41:44 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh my god
- [4:42:01 PM] Markku: snort
- [4:42:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Yeah right." Esaul said. His hand flew up clutching his head. "Oh no...Not this again..." He looked at Zora. "Run...now...go." His face looked as if he had been slashed with a flurry of knives.
- and there it is
- [4:42:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: ladies and dong
- [4:42:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: the first marked down case
- [4:42:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: of the berserker
- [4:42:30 PM] Flareth Sexbang: claps
- [4:43:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: brb
- [4:43:29 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ok
- [4:47:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: back
- [4:47:23 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yay
- [4:47:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul had been sitting down, sulking, when he felt a hand on his shoulder, and a voice,
- "Good to see you healthy and well, Esaul."
- "What do you want with me this time?"
- "Oh, nothing. I just wanted to...observe you in your berserk territory."
- Esaul was silent, a grimace on his face.
- "Anyway, to the point, I can use that now that I know how to utilize it. Can you guess who my first victims will be?"
- "Yes I can, and you can go ahead. They don't matter anymore, nothing does."
- "I didn't need your permission."
- "Now you have it."
- Esaul watched as Desaul disappeared in a ball of darkness.
- rhythm sir
- [4:47:47 PM | Edited 4:47:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: what are u doin
- [4:48:12 PM] Markku: he gon fuck desaul
- [4:48:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: hot
- [4:48:42 PM] Flareth Sexbang: kinky
- [4:48:53 PM] Markku: incest is wincest i guess
- [4:49:03 PM] Markku: if they can do it in the new fire emblem rhythm can do it too
- [4:49:21 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ...th-they can?
- [4:49:26 PM] Zora Sexbang: *zor quietly stuffing herself in a box in the background*
- [4:50:00 PM] Flareth Sexbang: am i gonna have to search fire emblem incest
- [4:50:08 PM] Markku: pfft
- [4:50:32 PM] Markku: it's not by blood
- [4:50:40 PM] Markku: most people thought it was at first
- [4:50:51 PM] Flareth Sexbang: http://www.gamefaqs.com/boards/643003-fire-emblem-awakening/63156734/705981482
- [4:51:20 PM] Markku: there has been so much incest in fire emblem tho tbh
- [4:51:49 PM] Markku: in awakening you can marry lucina to her cousin so i mean
- [4:52:04 PM] Flareth Sexbang: well
- [4:52:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: there's always that one character who'd totally bang a family member
- [4:53:00 PM] Markku: in the new fire emblem coming out you can marry/have sex/have children with your adoptive siblings/father
- [4:53:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul kept following the footsteps until he reached a red line. He followed it and it eventually turned sharply, making him crash into a wall.
- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ytCEuuW2_A
- [4:53:17 PM] Flareth Sexbang: adopted tho
- [4:53:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ...ye
- [4:53:38 PM] Markku: rhythm loves that fuckin' loser horn
- [4:53:54 PM] Flareth Sexbang: me too rhy
- [4:53:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: if he didn't keep having passionate affairs with the wall
- [4:54:39 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [4:55:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul ran while looking over his shoulder. He just kept running and eventually bumped into Zora, not seeing her. He fell to the ground. "Ouch."
- YOU SEE?
- [4:55:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: HE KEEPS WALKING INTO THINGS
- [4:55:38 PM] Markku: it's a fuckin trope is2g
- [4:56:05 PM] Flareth Sexbang: welp
- [4:56:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul lived through the repeating for a few minutes, but then he said, "Shut up. It's annoying. DAMN YOU DESAUL!" He yelled unexpectantly.
- did he just
- [4:56:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: do one of those
- [4:56:13 PM] Zora Sexbang: cliched shouts to the sky
- [4:56:19 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [4:56:24 PM] Markku: yes
- [4:56:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh my god
- [4:57:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: "One way. It's far away from here, Babylon Garden. There's a portal, but it's surrounded by guards, so I didn't dare go near it." Esaul said. He used telekinises to have Spirit to cut off the brackets on his wrists and the chains binding his wings together. "Let's go."
- Spirit: excuse the fuck outta u
- [4:58:07 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul saw what Zora was looking at. "That gives me a better idea. Stay here." He quickly changed his current form to Lunar, and grabbed a huge staff. He got in front of the crevice, directed himself toward the army, then slammed his staff on the crevice brutally. The crack spread toward the army, and soon just a small group was left. Esaul motioned for Zora to come out.
- sir where did you get literally any of this
- [4:58:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: where was that staff before you grabbed it
- [4:58:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: did u pull it
- [4:58:26 PM] Zora Sexbang: from ur ass
- [4:58:36 PM] Flareth Sexbang: hammerspace ass
- [4:58:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: ass of holding
- [4:58:48 PM] Markku: fuck
- [4:59:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora ran toward them with psycho-eyes, looking forward to seeing heads roll.
- are we absolutely positive she wasnt also a berserker
- [5:01:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: furthermore, zorana
- [5:01:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: how are you murdering so many fuckers when you're using the goddamn master sword
- [5:01:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: is everyone in the sacred realm evil af or
- [5:02:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: also
- [5:02:09 PM | Edited 5:02:11 PM] Zora Sexbang: [bad reputation]
- [5:02:16 PM] Markku: sacred realm of everything must die
- [5:02:30 PM] Flareth Sexbang: wow
- [5:04:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Oh, you're good." Desaul said, backing away. "But I think it's time." He rose up in the air. His face looked as if it had been slashed rapidly with knives, and he gained a purple aura around him. He had no pupils in his eyes. He slowly came back down onto the floor.
- "Move aside!" Desaul yelled, slashing the barrier with his sword.
- *sassy gay voice* uh oh
- [5:04:56 PM] Flareth Sexbang: n o
- [5:05:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: Desaul found himself losing energy fast. He leaned on his now giant sword, and said, "You don't think going berserk is the only thing I have, do you?" His aura suddenly began to glow, and soon enough, he was able to stand again.
- "Do you want to rethink yet? Too late." He charged the barrier, attempting to hit it like a baseball.
- somehow i dont think thats going to work
- [5:06:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: "No, I certainly don't." Zed said. "But my magic sleeve is full of trickles... oh? My barrier got broken..."
- Zed raised his hands, making a rain of meteors fall from the top.
- [Sburban Jungle plays in the distance]
- [5:07:07 PM] Flareth Sexbang: zed caused homestuck
- [5:07:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: https://twitter.com/Mort3mer/status/614552432853434368
- [5:08:02 PM] Flareth Sexbang: part of me is
- [5:08:03 PM] Flareth Sexbang: https://pbs.twimg.com/tweet_video/CIdUz5LUYAASmCJ.mp4
- [5:08:15 PM] Flareth Sexbang: the other have is going "nonononono"
- [5:09:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Don't underestimate berserk!" Desaul yelled, jumping up and grabbing a meteor, directing it at Zed.
- this just in: desaul is bro strider
- [5:09:47 PM] Flareth Sexbang: holy shit
- [5:09:50 PM] Flareth Sexbang: https://twitter.com/ericsapp/status/614539239296995328
- [5:09:51 PM] Markku: oh fuck
- [5:09:53 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh my fucking god
- [5:10:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zed barely got hurt by the meteor. "My magic, lady."
- Zed raised his arms and stuck Desaul in a square, ready to explode him inside.
- Zed is FUCKING BRUTAL
- [5:10:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: he totally is
- [5:11:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: Desaul looked up and saw the bugs coming. He teleported through the ground, making a shadow clone as he went. "I summon you, Whirlwind Lancer!" He yelled, making four sharp lances appear in his hand. He did a certain gesture, and used the wind to fly up into the air, making the lances levitate. Desaul zoomed at Zed, lances outstretched.
- did he just fucking turn into xaldin
- [5:13:23 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes he did
- [5:13:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: summary: brandong is a N333333333RD
- [5:14:01 PM] Markku: damn right
- [5:15:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul disposed of some stray guards, then eventually found a big crack in the sand. "Now if I remember..." He slowly put his hand on a portion of the sand. Instantly the crack opened wide and Esaul fell into it. He landed on what seemed to be a platform. The crack closed shut.
- i think u mean
- [5:15:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: the ASS crack oh i'm terrible
- [5:16:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: The vines quickly burned up, and the door slid open. Zora walked inside. The room was beautiful white with emeralds. On the large platform, there was a pedestal. On the pedestal, a green stone sat.
- "There it is!" Zora exclaimed.
- Cameron twerking in the background
- [5:16:54 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *parkouring
- [5:17:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: why not both
- [5:17:21 PM] Flareth Sexbang: the vines burned up you say
- [5:17:24 PM] Flareth Sexbang: did they do it
- [5:17:26 PM] Flareth Sexbang: for the vine
- [5:17:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: fghghjghk
- [5:18:00 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Yup." Zora tied it to her necklace, "Now we need Water, Shadow, and Spirit before we can get out of here. I already have Light, so we should get those 3, bring back what we need to, kick some more butt and be on our merry way. But let's go exploring some more first."
- Zorana where did u get the light rock
- [5:18:24 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ass
- [5:18:35 PM] Flareth Sexbang: out of her ass
- [5:18:49 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Or...Invader Zim world." Jax said.
- ...is this
- [5:18:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: the one
- [5:18:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: where they make them hug
- [5:19:02 PM] Flareth Sexbang: it's either that or three
- [5:19:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: also oh damn, only 20 pages to go
- [5:19:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oly shit
- [5:19:40 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *holy
- [5:19:47 PM] Flareth Sexbang: so when are we gonna start with 2? :D
- [5:20:03 PM] Zora Sexbang: rubs hands together
- [5:20:35 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Well, I never saw Invader Zim, so I'm screwed..." Oscuro mumbled.
- wasn't this his character in Sinnoh's Last Days
- [5:20:39 PM] Zora Sexbang: I think he got confused
- [5:21:07 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5:21:35 PM] Zora Sexbang: The Dragon morphed into a Voot Cruiser. Jax felt...different. She felt her head. Antenna.
- "I'm Irk! Schweet!" she said.
- well we knew she was tiny, but
- [5:22:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora felt shorter. Not by much, but she was shorter.
- "ME TOO!!!"
- zorana you are 5'7"
- [5:22:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: this implies that you're a Tallest
- [5:23:22 PM] Flareth Sexbang: welp
- [5:24:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: i am dying from all the lolrandom help me
- [5:24:15 PM] Flareth Sexbang: we were trash back then
- [5:24:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: why exactly did you name your SIR waffles
- [5:24:19 PM] Zora Sexbang: why
- [5:24:41 PM] Flareth Sexbang: I named mine Sierra tho
- [5:25:04 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh
- [5:25:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: zorana
- [5:25:15 PM] Zora Sexbang: ye
- [5:25:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: "You look nice." Jax said to Zim.
- JAX STOP
- [5:25:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: *spraybottle*
- [5:28:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax grabbed a lawnchair.
- "Why're we here?" Jax asked.
- "Splee! Waffle!" Sierra said.
- man i cant even remember where 'splee' was fucking from
- [5:28:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: i just remember i thoght it was hilarious
- [5:28:33 PM] Flareth Sexbang: catscratch
- [5:28:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: thank
- [5:29:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: i did /not/ play zim well
- [5:29:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: at all
- [5:30:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: "You FOUND IT???" Zora asked frantically. She took the stone out of Jax's hands. It was purple, and shaped like the crescent moon. When further examined, it had the heart imperfection the other 3 had.
- *zor ramping off a building on her motorbike in the background*
- [5:31:09 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [5:33:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Like, fox related, foxes..." Zed explained.
- me too
- [5:33:54 PM] Zora Sexbang: (dear zed: bandicoots aren't foxes)
- [5:34:20 PM] Markku: snort
- [5:34:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: (Cue and we should make a BlahbLahland music vid)
- ...no but
- [5:35:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: this is still a good idea
- [5:35:21 PM] Zora Sexbang: it'd be animated
- [5:35:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but
- [5:35:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: think about it
- [5:35:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: it'd be.....you....and you
- [5:35:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: and you
- [5:35:40 PM] Flareth Sexbang: no we about it
- [5:35:41 PM] Flareth Sexbang: D:
- [5:35:54 PM] Flareth Sexbang: im sorry i never learned to draw
- [5:36:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: not necessarily i mean, i need someone to do the video editing. and also pick the music.
- [5:36:26 PM] Flareth Sexbang: looks at brandong for editing
- [5:36:42 PM] Markku: i edit a youtube show every weekend so i mean yeah sure
- [5:36:50 PM] Flareth Sexbang: brb
- [5:37:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: brandong is our barry
- [5:37:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...slash kevin
- [5:37:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: also kay
- [5:40:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: so dong
- [5:40:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: how are you enjoying our snarkfest so far
- [5:40:23 PM] Markku: wonderful
- [5:40:28 PM] Markku: inspirational
- [5:40:31 PM] Markku: glorious
- [5:40:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: am i doing good, do you think
- [5:40:50 PM] Markku: yessss
- [5:41:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: i am having fun
- [5:41:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: ...man we have two whole RPs left to do
- [5:42:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: 2 and 3 were objectively the best but i bet they're still ripe with snark bait
- [5:43:10 PM] Flareth Sexbang: back
- [5:43:24 PM] Flareth Sexbang: we didn't do 3? oh yes we did te spinoff
- [5:43:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *the
- [5:43:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: have i mentioned i've been listening to slam jam remixes the entire time
- [5:43:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: that we've been here today
- [5:44:04 PM] Flareth Sexbang: omg perfect
- [5:44:04 PM] Flareth Sexbang: OKAY
- [5:44:08 PM] Flareth Sexbang: THE SHINDAN HAS SPOKEN
- [5:44:15 PM] Flareth Sexbang: Blahblahland - We're Going To Ibiza by Vengaboys AMV
- [5:44:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh
- [5:44:35 PM] Flareth Sexbang: alternatively
- [5:44:42 PM] Flareth Sexbang: X: The Step Into Other Worlds - Hard In Da Paint by Waka Flocka AMV
- [5:44:45 PM] Zora Sexbang: ....
- [5:44:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh my god
- [5:44:54 PM] Markku: omfg
- [5:45:15 PM] Zora Sexbang: well i mean rap like that is totally kit's jam sooo
- [5:45:54 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I don't mind." Zora said, "But if at any point in the night I wake up and scream something about pie, don't worry, this is normal."
- you lolrandom in your sleep
- [5:45:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: ok
- [5:46:05 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh dear lord
- [5:46:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: "If you sleep, the killer fairies will kill you." Zed said, joking.
- oh
- [5:47:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: welp
- [5:47:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: "There are evil fairies behind ya..." Zed said. He then made a waffle appear in his hand.
- ----
- Zora turned and stuck her tounge out.
- ----
- "Aaah!" The fairies yelled. They so fell on the floor, dead, of a heart attack.
- "Wew, that wush quek." Said Zed, eating the waffle.
- oh okay
- [5:48:13 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora whipped out her black DS Lite.
- ah yes
- [5:48:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: remember the days
- [5:48:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: i dont even have that DS anymore
- [5:48:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: it died
- [5:49:12 PM] Flareth Sexbang: my ds got the top cracked off
- [5:49:26 PM] Zora Sexbang: now i have my purple 3DS
- [5:49:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax whipped out hers.
- "Catch me Shemi! And a Shiny Espeon." Jax laughed.
- shaymin*
- [5:50:23 PM] Zora Sexbang: "You welcome, BUT, who has his Pokemon must fight me!" Shedinja said.
- "O RLY?" Zed asked.
- "YA RLY."
- "NO WAI!"
- "Ya, you will."
- *chokes on a meme chode*
- [5:50:43 PM] Flareth Sexbang: we were always meme trash
- [5:50:56 PM] Zora Sexbang: its like pepe is ramming his froggy dong down my throat
- [5:51:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: a rare pepe i hope
- [5:51:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: of course
- [5:51:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: fresh from the pepe leaker
- [5:52:12 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax woke up and grabbed her sword, dancing to Canned Heat.
- Why the hell did you like this song so much
- [5:52:23 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ...napoleon dynamite
- [5:52:29 PM] Zora Sexbang: ........ah
- [5:52:47 PM] Flareth Sexbang: havent heard that song in ages'
- [5:53:07 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax drew up a computer, went on Youtube, and turned on the Naruto-Canned Heat AMV.
- ...n-naruto
- [5:53:13 PM] Flareth Sexbang: faints
- [5:54:19 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i forgot totally about this song
- [5:54:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: naruto tho
- [5:54:42 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i was trying to be cool
- [5:56:32 PM | Edited 5:56:36 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Nah, I hit him with a fireball earlier... look at there!" Zed said, pointing to the remains of the Shedinja, slowly melting while saying TV Quotes.
- FATALITY
- [5:57:17 PM] Flareth Sexbang: fireballs can't melt ghost bugs
- [5:57:28 PM] Zora Sexbang: The fairies died of Fart Attack. Because Zed was doing fart noises.
- oh come on zed thats gross
- [5:57:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: :3c
- [5:57:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: you people farted more than kat does
- [5:57:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: and his entire existence is farts and puns
- [5:57:57 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ......yeah i could probably beat kat in a farting contest
- [5:58:16 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh no
- [5:58:34 PM] Markku: well
- [5:58:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: Suddenly, an army of Garbage Men, commanded by the Elite Garbage Man appeared. "What you done to them? We were marrying those fairies!" Yelled the Elite one.
- Zed laughed hard.
- ....???????????
- [5:58:46 PM] Flareth Sexbang: https://twitter.com/ninjasexparty/status/614558285610487808
- [5:59:01 PM] Zora Sexbang: about: me
- [5:59:04 PM] Markku: majestic
- [5:59:06 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i feel like that was an abwayax/izz meme
- [6:00:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax started to slash. In Elite Garbage man's brain was Larissa.
- ?????????????????????????????????????
- [6:00:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ...abwayax memes
- [6:00:38 PM] Markku: ???????????????
- [6:00:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: that is an abwayax meme i know that
- [6:00:55 PM] Zora Sexbang: who th fuck is larissa
- [6:01:03 PM] Flareth Sexbang: think maybe she ended up over at
- [6:01:04 PM] Flareth Sexbang: that one place
- [6:01:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: oh THAT larissa
- [6:01:17 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but i don't know
- [6:01:20 PM] Flareth Sexbang: maybe
- [6:01:26 PM] Flareth Sexbang: could be similar names
- [6:01:29 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i have no idea
- [6:01:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: the orange bread chick
- [6:01:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: i remember
- [6:01:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: who the fuck was she
- [6:01:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ...........ornage
- [6:01:40 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *ornage
- [6:01:42 PM] Flareth Sexbang: *orange
- [6:01:43 PM] Flareth Sexbang: bread
- [6:01:51 PM] Flareth Sexbang: sounds familiar ye
- [6:02:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: Soon, the whole army was defeated. Now, for Larissa.
- "Hallo thar Larissa." Jax said.
- She threw normal colored bread at her and she disappeared into purple smoke. She was thrown into the crazy world of Bollywood
- ...b-bollywood
- [6:02:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax started to weep.
- "I miss my mom." Jax said.
- aaaawwwww
- [6:03:12 PM] Flareth Sexbang: awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
- [6:03:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but seriously
- [6:03:41 PM] Flareth Sexbang: what is going on
- [6:03:52 PM] Zora Sexbang: i dont know
- [6:03:57 PM] Zora Sexbang: if i knew i would tell you
- [6:04:05 PM] Flareth Sexbang: was my mom in some sort of danger at that point which sunk into the rp
- [6:04:09 PM] Flareth Sexbang: she's FINE BY THE BY
- [6:04:24 PM] Zora Sexbang: i know we're in shrekworld and i know weird shit was happenin
- [6:04:35 PM] Zora Sexbang: looks like now jax and zed are just losing confidence
- [6:05:14 PM] Flareth Sexbang: my babies
- [6:05:48 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora was reminded of when she started this adventure, how mean and emo she was. She had changed since then, and now was a capable leader. She had guided them through the worst of times, even when she wasn't there. She got the one thing that could just bring them home. She knew what she had to do, and she wasn't going to give up, despite the threats of Dark Forms (Where is mine?) and evil creatures. She didn't fear death anymore. At one point, when she was in the Sacred Realm, she had wondered whether just to kill herself there and end the pain and suffering. Then she had gotten that message from the ghost, about the battle, and knew she was needed. She nodded for the door.
- "Are we going to let some stupid whatever ruin our lives? Ore are we going to win and get home?" she asked confidently.
- zorana givin herself a pep talk right off the bat
- [6:06:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: 'didn't fear death' oh my god something that stayed canon
- [6:06:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: she literally hangs around with Death
- [6:06:30 PM] Flareth Sexbang: perfect
- [6:06:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: he is her career mentor
- [6:07:02 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zed psychically levitated. "Win is one of best words, in life, and since life needs words. Win, win, win!!!" He happily shouted.
- zed knows what's up
- [6:07:35 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Let's ride the Jax Mobile." Jax said.
- The Preemient Car drove to them.
- HEY FLARETH
- [6:08:13 PM] Flareth Sexbang: :D
- [6:08:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: http://flightrising.com/main.php?p=lair&id=24158&tab=dragon&did=14145654
- [6:08:37 PM] Flareth Sexbang: u mean this
- [6:09:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: yes
- [6:10:26 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Izz." she yelled.
- The car started.
- oh okay
- [6:10:42 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6:10:46 PM] Flareth Sexbang: that's how it works
- [6:11:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Hmm...Spirited Away...a graveyard..." Jax said.
- confession time: i have never seen that film
- [6:11:41 PM] Flareth Sexbang: confession time: I've never finished that film
- [6:11:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: welp
- [6:11:56 PM] Markku: confession time: i don't think it's that good of a film
- [6:12:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: glad we're on the same page
- [6:12:38 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Are you two honestly THAT pathetic?" A voice out of nowhere said. The transparent figure of Esaul was hovering next to them.
- he's a ghoooooooost
- [6:12:41 PM] Zora Sexbang: he's a ghoooooooooooooooooooooost
- [6:12:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: suck his diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick
- [6:12:51 PM] Zora Sexbang: he's a ghooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooost
- [6:13:12 PM] Flareth Sexbang: lmao perfect
- [6:13:25 PM] Markku: omg
- [6:13:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: "ZE PREEMIENT CAR!" Jax yelled.
- im the same
- [6:14:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6:15:26 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul looked off into the horizon. He saw the black moon coming up, but that wasn't what his attention was focused at. There was a figure moving across the desert, toward them. "Who..." He muttered.
- who is she
- [6:15:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: she's beauty and she's grace
- [6:15:37 PM] Zora Sexbang: she's in a desert place
- [6:15:58 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6:16:15 PM] Zora Sexbang: "I don't know, bu-WHOA!" Esaul yelled. The figure had raised it's hand, and a huge. sandy structure came straight out of the ground. Esaul assumed that the figure had gone inside, because in a few seconds the structure went back underground. "What was THAT?!"
- you tell us fuckboy
- [6:16:57 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Explore?" Esaul asked, looking around. He bent down. "Er...Zora? This isn't sand."
- you're in a desert
- [6:17:01 PM] Zora Sexbang: what the fuck is it
- [6:17:11 PM] Flareth Sexbang: oh dear
- [6:17:14 PM] Zora Sexbang: "No...it's glass. And it's cracking. Run!" Esaul yelled, quickly running toward where the car should have been. "It's gone! The car's gone!" Esaul yelled, looking at the place where it had been earlier.
- how?????????????
- [6:17:30 PM] Flareth Sexbang: chaos magic
- [6:18:18 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Holy Jesus McSassypants I don't know."
- jesus mcsassypants
- [6:18:20 PM] Zora Sexbang: i
- [6:18:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: okay
- [6:18:45 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ........jesus
- [6:18:48 PM] Flareth Sexbang: mcsassypants
- [6:20:00 PM] Zora Sexbang: so does that mean
- [6:20:01 PM] Markku: well
- [6:20:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: its not just jesus
- [6:20:05 PM] Zora Sexbang: but
- [6:20:09 PM] Zora Sexbang: jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-sus
- [6:20:16 PM] Flareth Sexbang: f u c k
- [6:20:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: "And of course, we can't forget stampeding apples."
- ?????
- [6:21:34 PM] Flareth Sexbang: .......i immediately thought about the spongebob episode at the dance
- [6:21:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: omg
- [6:22:04 PM] Zora Sexbang: (I was thinking that we could go to the ORIGINAL Shrek world, where Shrek was awesome..yo)
- yknow you did have a point
- [6:22:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: our shrek was pretty different
- [6:22:20 PM] Flareth Sexbang: but still awesome
- [6:22:25 PM] Zora Sexbang: ye
- [6:22:42 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Huh?" Jax asked, "Why's there a sign for Pikatown?"
- the fuck is this
- [6:23:27 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Why meeeeeeeeeeeeee???" Zora whined. Footsteps appeared in the background, and awesome Shrek came out.
- "Wot're you doin' in mah swomp?"
- *puts a gray sticker on my past self's forehead*
- [6:23:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: 'i don't think u tried at all'
- [6:23:47 PM] Flareth Sexbang: mg
- [6:24:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Well, I'll call you fail, now. FAIL!" Zed said, mockingly.
- r00d
- [6:24:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: The dragon began to take off. A glowing portal formed, just by Zora thinking about it.
- "How did I do that?"
- your 'wondersage powers' probably
- [6:25:13 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6:25:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: (When will the RPG end. Because I wanna make this sad ending)
- hmmmmmmmmmmmmm
- [6:25:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: nah
- [6:25:47 PM] Zora Sexbang: i remember that made me so fucking angry
- [6:25:57 PM] Zora Sexbang: i /hated/ those kind of endings
- [6:25:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: still do
- [6:26:02 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ....so do i actually
- [6:26:16 PM] Flareth Sexbang: wait
- [6:26:17 PM] Zora Sexbang: welp
- [6:26:26 PM] Flareth Sexbang: when was the date i said that
- [6:26:33 PM] Zora Sexbang: Aug 24 07 4:04 PM
- [6:26:38 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ok
- [6:27:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: nah that was too early to be the cause ok
- [6:27:22 PM] Zora Sexbang: ?
- [6:27:24 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i just was a dick apparently
- [6:27:36 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i thought maybe that one episode of ed edd n eddy
- [6:27:43 PM] Zora Sexbang: ohh
- [6:27:45 PM] Flareth Sexbang: you know the one where it was meant to be the finale
- [6:27:53 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i thought maybe that fucked me up
- [6:27:59 PM] Flareth Sexbang: that fucked me up big time
- [6:28:29 PM] Zora Sexbang: Esaul appeared and fell flat onto his face. "Oof." He muttered, on his knees.
- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ytCEuuW2_A
- [6:29:30 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zora examined the pedestals. She ran up to one of them, and put the green stone in it. The stone glowed rather brightly.
- "I figured it out."
- good jorb
- [6:30:06 PM] Zora Sexbang: Zed psychically paralyzed himself in the air. "Now what?" He angrily asked.
- ...how
- [6:30:14 PM] Flareth Sexbang: he's zed
- [6:30:18 PM] Flareth Sexbang: he dont need a reason
- [6:31:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: "Don't call me that." Dark Zora said.
- "Why are you here?" Zora asked, "You look... Different."
- It was true. Dark Zora now looked exactly like normal Zora, but with black hair.
- ♫♪ reunited and it feels so good ♫♪
- [6:31:46 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6:32:10 PM] Zora Sexbang: "And this is where your journey comes to an end. This portal will take you home. However, Esaul must go first."
- why, exactly?
- [6:32:46 PM] Zora Sexbang: "OK, now you may go, he is restored." Dark Zora said, "I will be going with you."
- "Back home?" Zora asked.
- "Yes. I intend to go with and live with you." Dark Zora nodded toward the portal, "It's time for us to go."
- The pair walked into it.
- no shit sherlock
- [6:32:58 PM] Zora Sexbang: Jax opened her eyes.
- "Man." she said, "That was insane."
- She yawned and stretched. She felt her back. The sword was still there.
- "It was true." Jax said.
- Jax End
- [6:33:08 PM] Zora Sexbang: [when can I see you again plays over the credits]
- [6:33:14 PM] Flareth Sexbang: that's not the true end
- [6:33:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: post zed's end
- [6:33:32 PM] Zora Sexbang: *record scratch*
- [6:33:34 PM] Zora Sexbang: "We're back! Everyone's happy!" Zed yelled, jumping and hugging everyone.
- Ze real end.
- [6:33:40 PM] Zora Sexbang: *song starts again*
- [6:33:54 PM] Flareth Sexbang: ....this was a journey
- [6:34:44 PM] Zora Sexbang: yes it was
- [6:35:09 PM] Markku: absolutely
- [6:35:28 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i can't wait for bbl2
- [6:35:59 PM] Zora Sexbang: that's gonna be a ride
- [6:36:13 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes
- [6:36:15 PM] Flareth Sexbang: yes it will
- [6:36:19 PM] Flareth Sexbang: i just wanna hug you guys
- [6:36:27 PM] Flareth Sexbang: you guys have fucking molded me
- [6:36:31 PM] Zora Sexbang: <3
- [6:36:33 PM] Markku: <3
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