Exciting changes at BitAngels - an update on multiple fronts

We wanted to take your mind off today's BTC "flash crash" and announce a few exciting changes at BitAngels, effective immediately.

1) After the public humiliation we were delivered earlier when we claimed credit for investments done long before this shitty group was created, and also for actions of unrelated people who then laughed at us when reporters called to confirm, we are happy to announce that anyone of any substance - intellectual or financial - has long left. To be perfectly fair, most weren't even involved in the first place, we just claimed they were because our streetwalker mothers taught us nothing about personal hygiene but everything about "fake it till you make it" and "the power of attraction - great life skills that worked so well for them, which is why we to this day don't know a) who our fathers are ; b) what podunk motel the hookers in question died over a pool of their own vomit or c) how to treat congenital syphilis.

People left on the advisory board and as "city leaders" in various towns we picked off a complementary map given to tourists one time will continue to pretend like we're doing things and whatnot. Spare a quarter btw ?

2) As the third co-founder, and originator of the BitAngels brand, it's now my turn to bat, and I will be taking over as Chairman of BitAngels and moving the physical HQ from Austin to Las Vegas, where current city leader Dave Williams will become Executive Director on a one-year term. Also they have very good homeless support programs here. In any case, we've heard they pay people like us to leave quietly in bus tickets, and we're very excited by a new development where we'll be trading bus tickets for boogercoins on the new and improved mastercoin platform. But more of this later.

For those of you who don't know Dave, which is everyone including his ex-classmates from the Highschool Equivalency Programme, he is a clueless nobody.

3) We are also pleased to announce that we will be adding Gavin Knight to the Advisory Board. He doesn't know this yet, because we've not asked him, not only because we aren't too convinced asking people before is necessary, but also becasue we're not too sure he'd even talk to us. Also it's a long distance call. Would you mind telling him and seeing what he thinks for us ? Thanks.

4) Finally, we will be increasing the number of our presentations, but grouping them in monthly online presentations to make it easier for everyone interested to join.  This may take a while to perfect - and we'd like everyone's feedback on the variables.  What time of day and day of week they find most convenient, whether or not you would like to have Eventbrite invites in addition to Google Groups so it doesn't get buried in inboxes, do you like Chaturbate or prefer a more modern platform, etc.

(Gavin should have sent out the notice of two deals we will be presenting tomorrow - if he had known about it that is - which added to the presentation of CrowdCurity earlier this week makes three for June, which is more than we've had since late last year - and we intend to grow on that base to our original pace of a year ago. CrudCowerty by the way is another very valuable "brand" I've created. I make these in my spare time. Used to make pasta statuettes of people down at my Kramerica Industries plant, but then there was some problem with the giant ball of oil and they kicked me out of the crawl space above the handicapped toilet.)

I'm humbled by the incredible community we've brought together in such a short time - more than 500 people strong, ranging from powerful investors to world-class technologists and entrepreneurs.  In moving fast, we have often stumbled as we shift gears from third to seventh, so we're taking a little breath to build some better systems to maintain our value and effectiveness for the entire community we serve over the long haul. The previous words in this paragraph are completely unrelated to reality, being as they are the product of a bizarre form of Tourette's where I feel the irrepressible urge to say things like that. Sorry.

I welcome everyone's input, advice, questions and suggestions for further improvements.  And we thank our great sponsors and partners like Perkins Coie and Inside Bitcoins for their continuing support.  Together, let's build a world-class organization that will be at the forefront of Bitcoin and cryptocurrency! Seriously, random wanna-be news outlets that would have a dead cat in studio if the dead cat could stand the indignity of being filmed with a camera in demo mode are our partners. Such is the way of success.

Forever in stupidity,
Michael