Gynophobia

>The early afternoon sun falls through what passes for your window to the outside world, and leaves you feeling empty as it always does.
>Those filtered beams of light are nothing but a reminder of the freedom you used to have, but will never truly hold again.
>Something taken from you without remorse simply for being you.
>Sitting in this colorless room, draped in a sheet that's just as plain is all that's left for you, until the end of your days.
>All because of your slight... Problem.
>Even without speaking it, the biting laughter and anger come to you unbidden at that word, amalgamating into something better suited for the mouth of an animal.
>Because you're nothing but an unsolvable problem, a door with a thousand locks and a single rusty key.
>A little contact, some small token of affection is all you wish to ask for, but the words won't ever come.
>Please, just this, please anything.
>You're so tired of waking up in the middle of the night to nothing but a cold, empty room.
>Why won't they understand?
>You aren't broken, you aren't something to be thrown away and ignored.
>So why, why do they treat you like this?
>Your rambling thoughts never cease, always tearing their way through what they call a shattered mind best left forgotten.
>Never giving you a moments rest, never giving way to the true light of clarity and blessed silence.
>Until the sound of a door opening comes to you at last, and the terrible thoughts of a life spent in solitude and loneliness come to an end.
>Your mind isn't shattered, you'll show them all.
>The you that was broken died in here, alone, and crying for an affection that would never come.
>But what remains will go on howling for that affection, and you'll take it by force if necessary.
>Rising up, you make your way towards freedom at last.

>The early afternoon sun falls through gently swaying leaves, solitary beams of light, lancing and breaking the wave of cool shadow that washes over you.
>Staring drowsily up through the shifting foliage, you take in what you can make out of the sky above.
>Dancing pinpricks of luminous white against a sea of black and green, lulling you ever closer to a much needed nap almost hypnotically.
>That's just fine with you.
>It's hard trying to deal with how your life turned out at times, but relaxing junctures like these are always right around the corner to offer you momentary reprieve.
>Ever since you arrived here, making your way financially has been more difficult than you would have imagined for a place like this.
>It isn't because of your species, or any kind of racial bigotry.
>There's simply not much you can do for the pone folk that wouldn't be more capably handled by one of their own kind.
>You'd like to think that you're a fairly respectable tradesman.
>Woodworking, metal fabrication, general mechanical repair, there are many things you can do competently.
>Yet you're not outstanding enough at anything to warrant preference for you over those pones whose entire life revolves around their trade and cutie mark.
>This leaves you in the position of a jack of all trades, hireable for jobs when a customer can't quite afford to call in the specialist.

>You work hard every day to the best of your ability for the equivalent of minimum wage, and don't really have much to show for it, but you're happy for the most part.
>Lord knows you aren't rich, and you don't have much spending money after acquiring the bare essentials from month to month.
>But you do have a modestly sized home, food in the kitchen, and good friends to share your happiness with.
>Though there's a flip side to the coin, other problems to worry about aside from financial ones.
>A black spot on your otherwise completely acceptable life, that draws the eye with it's unsightliness.
>What started as a cute infatuation towards you by a local hero, has snowballed into borderline criminal harassment.
>Every day she's there, following in your footsteps, staring through your window, generally being the classic archetype of a stalker.
>She tries to guess what your sexual fetish might be in some insane gambit to win your love.
>It was a small nuisance at first, something almost amusing to look forward to each day, but you can see her getting more desperate.
>Each guess is becoming more depraved and twisted, her eyes getting just a little bit more manic with each failed attempt.
>With her soft voice that's as welcoming and warm as your own mothers, she asked you if violent rape was your fetish.
>How do you react to something like that?
>You were never a terribly violent person, even with your anger issues, but you've taken to carrying a pocket knife with you just in case.

>How messed up is that, that you feel the need to carry protection against someone who allegedly loves you, a female no less?
>The cute pegasus with a coat like butter and sunlight, who shies away from anything even remotely threatening... Is beginning to scare you.
>As much as you want to deny it, the comforting weight in your pocket speaks the truth in your stead.
>Thankfully, there's moments like this that take the edge off.
>Being able to just doze under the shade of a tree, as the breeze brings the comforting scents of summer flowers and baked goods from the town beneath the hill you rest on.
>You can make out the sounds of birds singing joyfully, the distant chatter of the village, and even a dog barking somewhere nearby that you vaguely hope isn't Fluttershy walking Winona.
>They blend together in your halting stream of consciousness, a background lullaby that brings you deeper into your slumber.
>Until the clop of hooves nearby followed by the barking of that dog let's you know that you aren't alone.
>Fighting against the urge to remain prone and let the sounds of summer take you further away, you open your eyes once more to take in the shifting light above.
>With a few bleary blinks and a yawn to shake off your laziness, you slowly rise and look around.
>Only to be met with a sickening crunch, an instant of nauseating pain, and then darkness.

>The rhythmic beating of a heart monitor somewhere in the distance as you return to the waking world tells you that you're in a hospital.
>If you weren't sure this was the case, the throbbing ache coming from your face would make you wish that you were.
>With a soft groan, your eyes open to the harsh white of florescent lights illuminating the room.
>Your sight is accompanied by visual trails that you try to blink away, and the kind of thick padded feeling in your mind that comes from being medicated.
>Once more willing away the desire to lay your head back down and continue to sleep, you glance around the room to find a very concerned looking Twilight Sparkle sitting next to you.
>Locking your own glazed eyes with her sympathetic ones, you clear your throat to speak.
"What... Happened...?
>Simply lifting your lips to form words sends waves of agony through your face that make you want to void your stomach.
>The purple alicorn smiles gently to put you at ease, but the worry in her eyes remains strong.
>"I'm not exactly sure, Anonymous... Rainbow Dash found you underneath a tree this afternoon with a broken nose, a shattered cheekbone, and... Your pants torn to shreds... I know how much humans value their modesty, so we didn't really know what to think..."
>"Though the samples that were drawn from the fluids around your genitals leads us to the conclusion of sexual assault."
>A voice from the doorway leading into the room draws your attention to Doctor Stable.
>He looks as calm as ever, though his frown and gaze have hints of anger in them.
>"This kind of thing just doesn't happen around here, I'm so sorry you had to endure something so traumatic Anonymous..."

>You can hear the words, but it's difficult to process any information at the moment.
>All that's running through your mind is the thought of a medical bill, and needing to go buy new pants.
"So I..."
>Twilight hops up onto the bed to embrace you.
>"It'll be alright, Anonymous."
>Why wouldn't it be?
>You would need to work into the night with a few extra odd jobs to cover the expenses, but it's nothing you haven't done before.
>"A royal guard would like to take a statement from you, but you clearly aren't in the state of mind to be questioned."
>Nodding slowly, you bury your chin into the soft purple fur of Twilight's coat.
>Your face aches, but the body hugging you is warm, and the plush quality makes you want to drift back to sleep with her in your arms.
>So you do.
>The pones in the room continue speaking to you, but the words fall on deaf ears as your heavy eyelids close once more.
>Bright pain from your apparent wounds becomes a dull throb, and then disappears completely as unconsciousness grips you once more.
>The last thought that comes through in your hazy thoughts is that Fluttershy must have finally grown a pair and taken what she wanted.
>You're almost proud of her.

>She actually did it.
>Since you woke into lucidity, anger and fear were the only emotion you could feel at your helpless situation.
>It overcame any sense of pain that your broken face may have brought you, any consolation that the frequent visits from your friends could have offered.
>That bitch did this to you.
>This pain, the added expenses that you would incur because of it, all her.
>The doctor came once more to explain the circumstances of your discovery, how you were found knocked out with the clear markings of a buck to the face.
>How your pants were ripped to pieces in an attempt to gain access to the flesh beneath.
>Your emotions surged to an apex at that, his conclusion of you having been raped.
>You didn't mean for it to get so out of hand, but there was nothing else you could do in your helplessness.
>Yelling with a ferocity that left your throat raw, you punched, kicked, flipped, and threw anything within reach.
>It was childish, and served no purpose, but you felt all the better for letting it out like you wish you could directly to her face.
>That bitch actually worked up the nerve to rape you.
>She apparently came to visit you in your drugged, barely conscious state.
>And the fact that she would be so bold as to even show her face around you is enough to make you want to start screaming all over again.
>As soon as you get out of this hospital, you swear to fucking...
>You wanted to clench your fists until your palms bleed, to shatter the windows with the fury of your shouts.

>You didn't deserve this.
>It shouldn't have escalated to such a point, you should have dealt with the problem the instant you caught wind of her sickness.
>But you waited, procrastinated, let her simmer in her lust for you, and the rewards are yours to reap.
>This should never have come to pass, especially in a world as bright and cheerful as this.
>The guards came to speak with you in an effort to hopefully prosecute whoever was so heinous as to commit such a crime.
>They didn't come to any conclusion.
>Thinking that the meek and shy pegasus would be able to go through with something like this was ridiculous.
>It was laughable to even consider the Element of Kindness of being capable of such an act, and laugh they did.
>Absolutely disgusting, the lack of attention to detail and care of these guards.
>Blaming them for their negligence isn't difficult, but considering the rarity of such violent crimes here, perhaps it should have been expected.
>Your friends were there for you in your time of need, and visited regularly.
>It feels wrong to say, but you almost wish they hadn't.
>Pinkie Pie baked you a cake, Rarity made you a new coat to wear when you were released, but nothing would give you the sense of justice in the world back.
>Nothing but the weight of the knife in your pocket.
>It helped to pass the time fantasizing about what you'd like to do to her, but with each passing hour your anger cooled.
>With the anger cooling, the cold fear came back.
>She had done this to you, and no one believed you.
>What's to stop her from doing the same thing again?
>As much as you'd like to think that your knife offers protection, it's difficult to imagine such a tiny thing being much use against someone that can floor you with a single kick.

>Your stint in the hospital eventually came to an end after only a couple of days.
>The miracles of pone magic helping to heal you back into perfect shape with not even a scar to show for your time there.
>There were offers for a party after you got out, and when that failed, simply to have some of the girls escort you home.
>Is it strange that you didn't want them around you?
>If someone that's perceived to be as gentle as Fluttershy could have put you down, what about a pone as strong as Applejack, or fast as Rainbow Dash?
>No, you decided that you wanted nothing more than to get back to the safety of your home as quickly as possible.
>So with as little fuss as you could muster, you sign the papers for your release and walk through the door.
>And there she is.
>Humming softly to herself as she stands outside the hospital, presumably waiting on you.
>Any thoughts you had of revenge or getting even crumbled at the sight of her, a cold sweat forming on your brow from just the idea of confrontation.
>She doesn't see you coming, and that suits you just fine.
>Coming to a stop a good distance away from her, you call out in a shaky voice to catch her attention.
"Hey."
>Her ears flick about before she turns to face you with an excited smile that would have been normal on any other day.
>"Oh, A-Anon! It's so good to see you again, I was just worried sick ab-"
"I want you to stay away from me."
>Confusion overcomes her for a moment at your interruption, before a look of hurt covers her features quickly after.
>"Anon...?"

>She moves to step towards you, but in an instant your knife is out and flashing in the sunlight.
"I'm not asking you, stay away from me."
>She halts with wide eyes as you brandish the blade in her direction, apparently shocked that you would be willing to threaten her.
>"Anon... W-why are you doing this...?"
>Like she doesn't fucking know.
>Visibly upset at your actions, she bites her lip with lowered ears.
>That trembling coursing through her, those tears in the corners of her eyes, they are a fair judgement for what she did to you.
>It's the least she deserves.
"I won't warn you again."
>Stepping around her slowly without breaking eye contact, you continue down the path without another word.
>The dam breaks into a gentle sobbing behind you, but you could care less about those tears meant to draw you in.
>As long as she doesn't get an inch closer to you, you won't have to turn around.
>Walking through the town briskly, you avoid contact with any of the pones who would slow you down, and return to your home.
>Your face hurts.
>Popping open the bottle of pain relievers that were prescribed to you, you take more than you probably should and lie down.
>Staring at the ceiling blankly, you drift into a fitful sleep.
>You dream of shadows lurking just around the corner, waiting for a chance to strike out at you, and of small yellow pones that watch with ravenous hunger for when you close your eyes.