lynn pov

>ever since I was little, attention is something that filled me up with drive and determination
>I wanted to be the best at everything, because it is the best who the spotlight shines on, and I want that spotlight
>but this is not the spotlight I wanted
>I'm guilty of something that until now didn't feel wrong at all, but the more thought I put into it, the worse I felt
>and now I am being forced to narrate all of this in full detail, to the deadly predator that is my sister Lori
>"So, is any of you gonna say something?" She said, eyeing both of us
>I hoped that Lincoln next to me would say anything, he's always been better at telling stories, but something tells me he is thinking the exact same thing as I am.
>"Guys, this can easily go one of two ways," Lori kept going on, "either one of you start talking or it is me who's gonna do the talking, and that wont necessarily be with the two of you"
>my throat gulped involuntarily. It was do or die.
>"Fine, fine! I'll do it." I stupidly say as Lincoln was about to gather a big breath, which he immediately releases.
>"Thank you, Lynn. Go ahead."
>"This..." the words aren't hard but they really don't wanna come out, "this whole thing started a little more than a month ago..."
>I lied
>Unless you consider "a little more than a month" to be actually three months.
>here goes nothing
>the story of how me and my younger brother started a relationship that trespassed the limits of fraternity, and put me in the wrong spotlight

>It was a Friday night, like any other
>except for the fact that it had been raining horrendously all day, not a chance of going out to play anything at all
>for the rest of my sisters, the rain is an opportunity to relax and do absolutely nothing all day, but for me it can only cause anxiety and uneasiness
>the entire house went to sleep very early seeing as there was nothing to do, so I took the opportunity to just watch TV and try to make time faster
>I grab a blanket from my room, sit on the couch and transform into a Lynn Burrito
>wow this is comfier than I thought
>I spend some time channel surfing, but nothing seems to be of any actual value, just reruns of cringy 90's sitcoms and infomercials
>to boredom wouldn't last too long, as I hear somebody walking down the stairs
>it is guess, who, my brother Lincoln
>"Hey Lynn. Funny seeing you around here" he says as he walks towards the fridge
>"Eh, there's really nothing to do is there? I'm trying to watch TV but TV is boring. None of my sports start until tomorrow morning. This is torture."
>Lincoln comes back around with a glass of milk and sits next to me. He looks just as miserable as I am
>"Hey bro, if you want you can just take the controller, I'm not really watching anything." I put the controller next to me and laid down on the couch. Lincoln complies and starts browsing through channels.
>he ultimately finds nothing, and resorts to clicking the channel up button indefinitely
>then it hits me
>Dads loves his TV. He makes sure to have every single premium package available, but all those premium packages include, well, the more questionable channels available
>uh-oh
>"Um Lincoln," I try to get his attention, "I wouldn't keep going up if I were you."
>"Why not?" He continues to go up into no man's land
>"Trust me, Lincoln. Not a good idea."
>"I'll take my chances"
>your call, Linc. This is going to be hilarious.

>it's coming home, lads...593...594...595...Five Ninety-siiiiiiiiiiiiix....
>nothing
>"Restricted Channel?" Lincoln shouts in frustration, "what do you mean restricted channel? You mean there were more TV channels than I knew of and I couldn't watch them?"
>"That's right, Lincoln. They've been there all along...waiting to be watched. What a shame there's a passcode to it, or else you can the sacred club of secret television-watchers."
>If anyone knows how to stir Lincoln, it's me. All you gotta do is say he can't be part of something, and hell do anything in his power to prove that wrong.
>"Sacred club of TV-watchers my butt! Lynn, what's the pass code!?"
>"Well, let's think." I sit back up and undo the Lynn Burrito to get into thinking position. "Dad is the one who controls this box. The code is four numbers right, so what we must do is think of four numbers that might be important for Dad. Let's try the most obvious option, I suggest we begin with MY birthd-"
>"7482. Got it."
>what
>"Are you sure you want to proceed. Well geez, I guess the answer is ye-"
>"Wowowowow, back the heck up. What!? Where did you come up with that number?! What!?"
>"7482. It spells Rita when you type it in one of those old-school phones. I figured that he wouldn't play favorites with his kids so he went with Mom."
>Holy crap. That was...stupidly clever. I've been trying to guess that passcode for ages, for science and humanity purposes, of course. An he just comes here and gets it on the first try. I need to keep him around more often.

>"Well mister genius, go ahead! The crowd of one is waiting on you to make the move!" I encouraged him to finally press the goddamn button
>"Oh yeah, for a second I forgot what I was doing. Here we go!" Kid finally presses down enter.
>and once again the TV disappoints me
>Lincoln put the channel on during that 6% of the time where nothing happens, just a guy and a girl pretending they know how to act instead of fucking each other, the only actual skill they have that can make them money. Poor souls, I've wonder what happens to them when they turn old and ugly
>this however, might not be all that bad. It gives me a chance to divert his attention a little so he doesn't actually know what's going on before it blows up on his face
>"Ooh, I think I've seen this one before. I remember it being about this guy who is really, REALLY sick. Nobody knows what's wrong with him, so he has to go to the hospital to get checked out by a nurse. Apparently she's the best one around."
>oh yeah, apparently this is one of those
>the TV shows this guy trying his best to pretend to pass out from whatever the hell is supposed to ail him after calling 911, and wakes up in the hospital bed, where our little blonde, fake titted nurse wakes him up.
>The nurse seems to distract him well enough that he doesn't see me grabbing the controller from his side and putting it under the couch, behind me, so he won't be able to panic switch away
>"Wow," Lincoln says while saliva cascades from his mouth, "that is a very...'attractive' nurse."
>Sure it is, Lincoln. Sure it is. I wonder how this very "attractive" plans of curing this guy from his "illness"
>The nurse and the patient slowly start going at each other, which makes Lincoln immediately uncomfortable. He starts to pat around him trying to find the controller, but unfortunately he wasn't careful enough to not lose it

>Ooh, we have our first sign of nudity! Just some good old pulling from our male subject is enough to remove the nurse's top.
>Lincoln panics. He desperately tried to find the controller by throwing cushions around and repeatedly saying "oh god" to himself as if that would make him search faster
>I try not to make it obvious too early on, but this is too much. It is exactly how I pictured it. I'm laughing out loud to the top of my lungs, which immediately gives me away. What a shame.
>"Lynn!" Lincoln whispers rather loudly, "are you crazy?! You're gonna get us in trouble!"
>I laughed for a little longer before I manage to speak a few words
>"God damn, relax bro! There's no one awake! Besides the rain covers all the sound, we're gonna be fine."
>"Whatever Lynn, prank's over, change the channel."
>"I don't know, Lincoln, I'm really getting into this story. I think I'm gonna stick around a little longer to see what happens. Hey, you can enjoy the show as well." I lay back down on my side to get myself more comfortable, and pull the blanket back over me.
>Lincoln looked between two minds whether to run back up to his room or stay, but surprisingly he does. He's that bored that he rather sit next to someone with porn playing on TV than being alone.
>"Well this is shocking." I mock him
>"I'm just gonna be here and drink my milk quietly. I'm not gonna be watching that. I just don't wanna be by myself any longer."
>what a liar
>"suit yourself, Lincoln. This is some really good stuff." I turn my attention back to the TV, and find that the couple already made quite the advancement on their wholesome activity.
>it was actually getting kind of arousing at this point

>Lincoln looked in a world of conflict. He seemed upset and refused to look at the screen, for the most part. He would glance every now and then, then go back to his milk.
>But when you come to bitch like a little kid and drink milk, eventually you run out of milk, and things to bitch at. Every little glance was longer than the next. I wasn't even watching anymore because I all I saw was him.
>He was strongly fighting temptation, temptation of just sit back and enjoy the show, to give in to his own nature as a mammal, but yet he refused.
>Let's try yo play with him a little more
>"So! How you like it so far, Linc!" I jump at him to scare him, which successful does. Made him drop his empty glass of milk as a bonus.
>"Lynn! Leave me alone!" He pushed me away by the shoulders and lay all the way back to the other side of couch, conveniently laying on the side facing the TV, and putting his legs close to his chests to obscure any signs of stiffening around his pants
>I swear this is gold
>"Hey if you're planning on doing anything, at least use a blanket, here take mine! Try not to be too obvious." I continued to tease him.
>"Lynn!" He moaned again, yet he complies with my request of taking the blanket and snuggling himself.
>damn now I'm cold, need another blankie
>I took my sweet time to get another blanket, to see if Lincoln would do something with his alone time
>with this being said, I never stopped and thought why I was doing this. Lincoln is my brother, why am I trying to torment him like THIS. What am I going for here?
>But the overwhelming evidence seems to be that something got into me, for some reason I couldn't see Lincoln as my brother. Something that made me unable to in a way, repulse any perverse thoughts as one could have about any person that isn't family. I don't know if it has anything to do with puberty or whatever you may call it
>But hindsight is 20/20. I am not attracted to my brother. Not in a romantic way. He's my brother and I love him, but that is different. What happened is not something I can explain, other than him being the only boy I was relatively close to, and that drew me to him. Again, I'm not proud of this.

>I must have taken around five minutes just to get a new blanket upstairs. I found what I was looking for thirty seconds in but I just stood there for the other 4 minutes and a half "thinking" about "stuff"
>After finally coming back to Earth, I timidly walk down the stairs, trying to look over the couch at Lincoln
>I think I see some movement under his blanket
>this is weird, I thought this would be funny, why isn't it funny, I was doing this for the laughs
>but it's not. It's something else. It's a kind of feeling I can't understand
>Why am I standing on the stairs, looking over to see if he is doing something to himself
>These questions, I didn't care to answer at that moment, I probably should have had.
>I carefully approach the sofa, trying my best to not make any noise and alert him. I hide behind the opposite side of the couch and look over
>He's clearly going to town under the blanket. A part of my wants to run away and avoid this, the other...
>nevermind that, I gotta try to make it funny somehow, so he doesn't start thinking something wrong about my goal here
>"Hey, are ya busy there, champ!?" I pop out from my cover and grin at him
>He's not laughing at me, or getting angry, he just looks totally embarrassed and defenseless.
>Any other day and this would be extremely amusing, but not today.
>I try to sit down next to him to comfort him somehow
>"Ugh, look, I'm sorry, Lincoln. I shouldn't have cornered you like this, I thought it would be something we would both laugh at both clearly none of us are having fun here. Don't be ashamed of yourself, everyone does this. Actually, you wanna know something funny? You've caught me many times doing the same, it's just that for a gal is easier to hide it."
>"Oh, really?" He answers unconvincingly.
>"Yeah, remember that time I was in the computer and you came down and ask me why I was down here that late, and then I-"
>"I saw you."
>"what
>"I saw you doing it."

>"You...you saw me masturbating?"
>"I didn't mean to...I had trouble sleeping when I heard someone making some noise down stairs. I got up too see what was going on, and that's when I saw you. I just stood there for a good thirty seconds  not knowing what to do. You looked quite...uh..."energetic" at it. Legs wide open. Saying things that I couldn't understand. Then you turned around and looked at me, and you immediately put your hand back on the mouse and sat straight again. I pretended to not know so you wouldn't get embarrassed."
>oh my god. I never realized that I was so obvious. I thought I was so discreet, then it turns out I get carried away.
>but that's not important right now, what matters is that, he did the same thing as me, minus the saving the embarrassment part. There was some curiosity from him as well
>why is this turning me on so much
>I realize then that I never wear pants during the night. I was only wearing my shirt. This did not help matters.
>That, among other stuff. Were clouding my thoughts. All rationality was slowly escaping my brain like steam, leaving only desires.
>I could feel my blood boiling , my hands palpitating. I didn't feel comfortable just sitting still because there was so much going on the inside.
>Why am I feeling like this. No, Lincoln is my brother. This isn't me. I'm not like this. It's wrong, it feels wrong, but what if no one...no one...
>and then I make the biggest mistake of all
>"Hey...wanna see me do it again?"

>For what comes after this, you're not gonna hear anything from me. No opinion, no hindsight. Not because I don't want to it care but because no real thought was going through my mind at that moment. I can only say what objectively happened.
>I had lost it. There is no doubts about that. Had I been thinking straight none of this would have happened, at least not as far as it did.
>Same could probably been said for Lincoln too
>"Huh?" He replies in confusion, sitting back up against the back of the couch
>"Come on, Lincoln. You're gonna try and play innocent now? I know you want to..." I get a little closer to him
>"I mean, uh...It's not like that, I don't..." Kid started sweating a little, but he didn't try to move away
>"It's a one time deal Lincoln, who knows when a chance like this is gonna present itself again. Hey, I'll tell you what. Come here, I'll do it if you take my panties, I might let you keep them after..."
>After saying this,  I lay back, arms under my head, close my eyes and silently wait for him to make a move. This might have been an attempt to show confidence but in reality limbs shaking are not a sign of that
>I felt some fidgeting going on around the surface of the couch, each second passing it was closer.
>His hand just barely brushed my leg as if it was an accident but it made me twitch as if I had been shocked with electricity, if only for half a second.
>"He, gathering some courage?" I chuckled, "Go on, I don't bite."
>I did hope he gathered some courage because impatience was running through my body. I started to look around for his hand in the general area of my legs, and eventually found it.
>He instantly tried to pull back, but I held on. Lincoln seemed to calm down, and was willing take a little guidance if it meant the common goal could be achieved
>Slowly but surely, I guide his hand towards me, placing his thumb under one of the sides of the panties.
>I think things can start to happen now

>Lincoln, even after I patiently guided him and encouraged him, was still very hesitant. I don't blame him, the whole situation was probably overwhelming
>but it didn't help me one bit then. I mean, come on, one in a lifetime chance shows up in your doorstep, and you hide behind your peephole looking to see if it's not too good to be true? Take a chance for once.
>after what seemed to be an eternity and a day, I waited, waited until he did had some guts to do a simple task. But then he finally does.
>in an excruciatingly slow motion, I feel my panties slide down my legs, the cloth caressing my skin softly and soothingly. For a good twelve seconds I don't hear a single sound or breath coming from him, so I tried my best to break the ice.
>"Heh, I can't believe you actually did it, you do remember I'm your sister right?" What a stupid comment right there. Fucking hell.
>"Lynn...
>"Sorry I'm just teasing ya." I chuckled for a bit before opening my eyes and looking down. I saw him on his knees with his hands on his things, staring down at my...ahem.
>"Quite a sight, ain't it. Is this the first one you see?"
>"Um-uh-yeah. I mean, I've seen them before on-"
>"On the internet...but that ain't quite the same am I right?"
>"Yeah...yeah, I guess this is better."
>"I agree. Well, a promise is a promise, and I keep my word. Here goes nothing."
>I moved back to the edge and opened my legs for him to get a better view.
>"Are you ready?"
>he could only nod. He was shaking like a puppy out in the rain, I don't think he could take any more teasing.

>So I did my best to deliver. At first I only touched the surface of my lips, the other lips, but slowly escalated from there. I tried not to make any noises while I was doing it so he wouldn't think I was too into it, but that was and outright failure. By the time I put a single finger inside of me I was already moaning out loud. Doing this to someone watching made everything ten times as exciting, and I just could help my self.
>I looked at him. We made eye contact for a second. His eyes told me everything. He wanted something, he wanted something really bad.
>I was about to cum, but as soon as I got that feeling of imminence I stopped.
>"Wanna help me out?" Let's let him do it for me.
>"M-me?" He sounded scared, but extremely exhilarated at the same time.
>"No, the wall. Come on quickly, before I cool down."
>Again he hesitated for a moment, but after that he didn't think twice. He moved up and slowly put a finger in me.
>Holy fucking shit. That felt amazing. Just the fact that it was someone else's finger and not mine drove me almost mad. Every little movement from him felt twice as intense as mine's.
>He picked up on my ecstasy, and sped up. I knew them that I wasn't gonna last.
>And I didn't. Only fifteen seconds after he started I was an absolute goner. I could only grab the blanket and stuff my mouth before screaming at the top of my lungs. I would have never imagined this would feel so much different.
>I wanted to say something, but words wouldn't come out of my mouth. Only high pitched squeaks and slurs.
>But before I managed to recover he out his mouth on it. The rest is history. I was no longer in control. For 10 minutes I allowed him to do anything that he wanted. Touch me anywhere, lick me anywhere. Fuck m-

>We did have sex that night. I can't recall everything that lead up to him being inside me but I remember perfectly the moment where my I felt my heart stop beating.
>We were going at it for like two minutes, the best two minutes of my life I might add, before the most terrifying sound I've ever heard in my entire life.
>"You really shouldn't be doing this."
>It came from what must have been a speaker system in the house somewhere. It was Luan's voice. The worst possible voice you could hear in that situation, tied with Lori.
>If Luan gets some dirt on you, she'll make you suffer. And this wasn't some ordinary, average dirt. This was advanced dirt.
>We immediately pushed each other off. With such strength that poor Lincoln hit the floor. We uselessly scrambled for our clothes, but the damage was already done.
>That little shit came down smugly down the stairs, looking like some evil plot for world domination had been successful.
>"Lincoln, I must say I'm shocked I'd catch you like this," She sad while slowly coming down, sliding her hand on the rail, "can't say the same about you, Lynn. I always knew there was something off with you."
>I wanted to run at her and beat the living shit out of her, but I felt so exposed and vulnerable I couldn't do anything. I just grumbled at her.
>"You know, this is some serious stuff. As genius and original as I am, I could have never 'cum' up with something like this...get it?"
>yes we fucking get it you whore
>"Luan, please don't tell anyone! Please, we beg you." Lincoln begged on his knees.
>"Tell? Ever heard of 'Show, don't tell'? Why would I tell anyone? They wouldn't believe me, besides, that wouldn't be too entertaining..."
>I'm gonna kill her

>"Luan, what the fuck do you want."
>"Oh, what I want? Huh, I didn't know we were negotiating. But hey! I'm open to business. I wouldn't be CEO of Funny Business if I wasn't!"
>sigh
>"Well, let's see, what do I want...hmm. Well, my YouTube channel is kinda short in funding at the moment. Nowadays comedy channels spend a lot of money in effects and props and whatnot, and I don't think that my grace and charisma alone can't allow me to keep up with the competition so it would make sense that-"
>"How much you slut" I lost my patience with her.
>"Wow, bit rich getting this from the girl who fucked her brother." Her smug smile and tone faded away fairly quickly.
>"Just...get to the point."
>"All of your allowances. For the next three months. We can figure something out after that."
>Oh no, that's bad. I was saving up for some new baseball equipment for the last three months. God I hate her so much.
>"Ugh, fine. But you have to destroy any evidence this ever happened. No one else has to know about it."
>"Sure, sounds like a fair deal. Hey, because I'm so nice I'll gladly get rid of any future incidents. Think of me as your guardian angel."
>"Yeah, when I catch you masturbating to those tapes I promise I won't tell anyone."
>Luan gazed at me, but decided not to respond to that.
>"Well, if we're done here, I'll let you guys continue your thing. I'll see you in the first of next month, and you better have my money. Or else this might accidentally land somewhere on the internet. See ya."
>And with that, she walked back up the stairs. If I had a gun during that conversation there would have been blood in the wall. I guarantee you that.

>Despite Luan, Lincoln and I mutually agreed that we were not done there. We had to finish what we started. Two minutes was not going to cut it.
>Besides, if were gonna pay her to keep her mouth shut, we might as well make good use of the part she herself proposed.
>Not that I know how she is going to find every single bit of evidence, and what she does with it when she does, but as long as no one gets a hold of what is happening, I don't care. We don't care.
>We decided to meet that next morning, and we managed to do our thing.
>The initial expectation that this was just a one-time experiment turned out to be not true as I kept going to his room every morning at the same hour. This was during the summer mind you, so time was available.
>We agreed on a routine as to not get caught, he would do it, he'd finish on a sock or on his own hand or whatever, and he would run to the shower.
>I always smelled sweaty so It wouldn't make a difference for me.
>This time he seemed that he either forgot or he just couldn't help it, and came all over my stomach.
>"Lincoln! What the fuck!? What am I supposed to do now!?" I asked in desperation.
>"I-I'm sorry...I didn't...uh...fine just go take a shower. I'll try to cover for you."
>I open the door just a little bit just to make sure the coast is clear. It is, good. No sight of sisters anywhere.
>Gotta blast
>I bolt across the entire length of the hall as far as my fluid covered body allowed me and lock the door behind me.
>"Jesus Christ, It's all over me." I inspect the damage. It seemed I instinctively tried to wipe off with my hands and it somehow got up to my forearms. It was going to take a while to shower it off completely.
>After taking the longest shower of my life, I step out and see Lincoln walking my way, looking goofier than usual. I tried my best not to laugh at the way he was walking but couldn't contain a stupid smile
>"Lynn..." He whispered at my ear,"I think...I think 'she' knows."
>what
>I look behind him and I see a little bit of yellow trying to step out of the picture.
>Oh god no
>not her

>"My room. NOW!" I grabbed him by the arm and dragged him along.
>I shut the door behind me and pushed him onto my bed
>"What do you mean she 'knows'? What the hell did you do? Did Luan tell her. I swear if it was her I'm gonna tear open her-"
>"Ah..I-I mean, you were taking a long time and I was afraid someone would start wondering where I was, so I just went down and tried to play it cool, but...she just smelled it. She smelled it off of me. I have no idea how, I'm sorry. She asked me questions in her room and I tried to evade her, but I don't know..."
>"Did she say she knew 'exactly' what we were doing? Or did she say she say she knew 'something'?"
>"Something."
>"Then she is not sure. All we have to do is avoid her. I guess that means we can't do this anymore."
>"Oh well, I guess it was fun while it-"
>"At the same hour, we gotta figure out a new time."
>"Oh"
>And so we did. Instead of meeting at 7 'o clock in the morning, where certain 'persons' are wandering around, we agreed on 4 AM instead. And only on Thursdays. We can't take risks when it comes to Lorisaurus.
>And that about seemed to have fixed everything. For a few weeks, no Luan, no Lori, no touching of the subject until it actually came to it.
>Except this one random night, where everything went terrible
>may god have mercy on my soul

>Lincoln told me that he had been hearing noises in his room during the night
>I told him not to worry about it, it was surely nothing
>surely
>comes Thursday, and as planned, I meet him I'm his room at 4 AM. He does not look as willing as usual.
>He's sitting on the side of his bed, arms crossed, rubbing himself anxiously.
>"I don't think we should do this tonight, Lynn." He told me, "What about Lori? She's been sniffing our tails for the last couple of weeks, what if she catches us?"
>come on Lincoln don't give me that
now
>"Relax, Lincoln. Lori hasn't been on to us in forever. She doesn't 'know' that we're doing this. She already gave up on that. Besides, Luan's got our backs. We're fine."
>"Alright, if you say so. So, where were we?" He moved back towards the center of the bed, looking a lot more inviting.
>"That's the spirit, bro!" I said, jumping at him, kissing him down. We haven't touched in a week and the cravings were running me down, so to say that was satisfying is an understatement.
>Yet a part of him wasn't one-hundred percent focused. He would glance every now and then to door, then to the vents, which was very noticeable and distracting.
>"What's up, Lincoln. Not feeling it tonight?" I sat back on my knees to give him some space.
>"It's not that, it's just that...I don't know if I'm just going crazy but I can't stop hearing that 'clicking' noise, I don't know where it's coming from..."
>"It's just your mind playing tricks on you," I said while slowly unbuttoning the neck of his shirt, "you gotta stop thinking about Lori and relax. Here lemme take this off."

>I sat him up and removed his pajama shirt. I raised my arms so he could grab mine, which he reluctantly did.
>The curious thing about it is that we didn't go anything further from kissing that night. We were naked, but somehow were satisfied with making out.
>but then Lincoln suddenly stopped.
>"Sshh! You hear that!?" He whispered.
>"Let it go, Lincoln." I tried to kiss him to stop talking but he would move away every time so he could keep mumbling about "the noise"
>He then stopped talking. He was staring to the left of me, almost petrified. He looked in complete and upmost shock, and I was scared to see where he was looking. But then I did.
>An arm .Holding on to a cellphone. Lori's cellphone.
>I screamed to the top of my lungs. She dropped the phone, followed by some failed, desperate attempts to catch it in the air, and then she falls on top of Lincoln's desk and then to the floor.
>"WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK!" I instinctively covered myself with Lincoln's blanket.
>What the fuck is Lori even doing!? Why!? How in the world did she find us out!?
>Lori must have spent 15 seconds passed out on the floor. When she got up, she looked completely disorientated. She would look at us, then look around, then back at us, like that. Then she locked on to something on the floor. Her phone. She was recording us.
>I have to get hold of it and delete the evidence. Immediately I jumped for it, Lori didn't react until 2 seconds later. I managed to take it before she even got close, but there was a catch. The phone was locked.

>Somehow, someway, the phone blocked itself when it hit the floor. I jumped on the bed to get away from her as much as possible and tried random combinations, but they obviously wouldn't work. That's when she manage to snatch it away from my grasp.
>I tried jumping on her, but I knew then that I was done for. There was no way for me to beat Lori who was 4 years older than me. She grabbed me by a choke-hold and it was game over. All I could do was rage at her.
>"Let! Me! Go! And give that back you pervert!" I continued to uselessly try to free myself. Needed those dignity points you know.
>"Pervert? You call me a pervert? Let me remind you of who is doing this with her brother." Oh come now that's cheating.
>and when I thought it couldn't get any worse I heard Leni, yes, fucking Leni, shouting from the vents. She then proceeded to fall from the vents like a retard, or more accurately like a Lori.
>"Ow...oh my gosh! Lori, why is Lynn naked!? What's going on!?" She covered her eyes.
>"Um..." I tried me best to come up with something but I'm not a quick thinker when it comes to words, "International Wrestling Day?" Oh, that wasn't too bad, "...in Japan?"
>Fucks sake, Lynn Jr.
>"Oh, uh okay, I'm...I'm just gonna go now." She rushed outside, still covering her eyes with her hands.
>We had a really tedious discussion with Lori after that. Basically, she said that we would discuss what to do in the morning, but for now, we should just go to sleep.
>I went to my room, and Lori went to hers. But I wasn't done there. Not even close. Lori must have figured it out from somewhere.
>More specifically, from someone. And I know exactly who is responsible for it. A snitch.

>I waited for a few minutes after Lori closed the door to her room, and walked where the snitch slept. She's gonna pay for this.
>I knocked on Luan's door.
>"Who is it!?" She yelled. I didn't answer. I just knocked again.
>"Ugh! I'm coming, just stop knocking!" The door opened, "Lynn it's 5 in the morning what do you-"
>I kicked her between the legs as hard as I could.
>I overheard one day Dad talking to Lincoln about some kid that was bullying him. He said that if some guy bigger than him, aim between the legs. Then they'll turn minuscule.
>Apparently, to some degree, this also applied to girls.
>She whimpered, immediately dropping the floor, grabbing her crotch all the way down. She started crying in pain.
>"I THOUGHT WE HAD A DEAL!" I yelled at her in anger.
>Luna was as useless as ever because she was wearing her headphones.
>Her crying turned into chuckles, then turned into a terrifying laughter.
>"What deal?" She said, still laughing on the floor.
>"The deal we made three months ago! You said you wouldn't tell if we paid you our allowance. And we did!"
>She sat back up, slowly calming her laughter.
>"Oh, that. Hehe, honey, that deal expired 4 days ago. Don't you remember what we agreed.
>"Oh, you bitch!" I kicked her right back down in the chest. She would start laughing again. It only made me more angry. I kept kicking, her stomping her, everywhere but she would still laugh.
>But eventually, her laughing stopped. She started crying again. She made an effort to laugh but it was all painful moans and groans.
>That's when I came to terms to what I did. I had essentially beaten my sister down to the ground. I could see anything because of her clothes, but I knew I has made some damage, more than I had intended.

>And all of this, brings me to now. My current reality.
>So deep in thought that I didn't realize that I was now alone in Lori's room, the door still moving from when everyone rushed out
>They are running to find the aftermath of my fury, my rage, my revenge.
>I followed everyone cautiously, peeking around the Luan's door. She was deep in the covers of her bed, hoping no one would notice her injuries. My interrogators rushed at her, sat her on the bed and examined her body, looking for my deeds.
>They found bruises everywhere, her skin covered in purple stains
>Luan still did not look like herself, if they tried to move her upper body a certain way she would cry in pain. Lori felt around her chest, eventually focusing on the particular spot that caused the joker to cry.
>"it's broken" I heard the words come from her
>"we got to tell mom and dad"
>"Leni go, quickly..."
>Which causes all the attention to turn to the door, and consequently, me.
>A brand new spotlight shined on me. I was no longer the confused kid that had a thing with her brother. I was now the violent psychopath that mercilessly battered her older sister, and broke some of her ribs.
>I felt the staring looks of everyone in the room weight down on me like a thousand pounds. A horrible feeling of guilt made my throat swell up to a point I couldn't even breath.
>The outside called.
>There was only one way for me.
>I have to run. I have to get out of here. I'm already dead. Might as well be dead away from my crimes. My victims. This entire family.
>I ran down the stairs, opened the door, and headed wherever my legs were capable of taking me.
>I heard Lincoln trying to cry out for me, but it was pointless. There is no rescuing me. I hope he understands and doesn't try to follow me into my death.
>I hope God forgives me one day. No one else has such mercy.

>In my race I wasn't really thinking of where I could go, or what to do where I get there.
>All there was in my mind is that I needed to get away as far as possible, then I would have time to think.
>Never mind the fact that all I was wearing is my shirt and my underwear. No pants, no socks, no shoes, no anything. I left my cellphone at home, and I didn't carry any money. Running barefoot, my feet where bound to get tired. Very quickly.
>I found myself instinctively running in the general direction of the city park. It was a 10 minute ride by car, but I figured it would take me at most 40 minutes to get there by foot.
>It seemed like the only logical place to go. I know the park like the back of my hand and there are plenty of places one can hide in.
>Half an hour later, I arrive at the park. It was still extremely early, not even 11 AM, so the park was almost deserted. Which is rather convenient when you are prancing around not wearing pants. I headed straight to the bathroom, locked myself in, and just sat on top of the toilet, thinking what could my next step even be.
>What must Mom and Dad be thinking right now? They probably think I'm a monster. Even worse if they get to know the entire story.
>I curled up and cried for hours. And not a soul that could give me some comfort. I was alone, and there's no one out there that could help me.
>Surprisingly, I managed to spend the entire day without being noticed. After getting myself together, I went to the park's pool where my lack of clothing wouldn't raise any eyebrows.
>But I was so hungry. All this families pulling out chips and cookies out of their bags and eating them in front of me was killing me. I made an effort not to look at them, just lay down and relax but the discomfort was far too severe for that. I hadn't eaten anything but a muffin Leni got for me when we were back home.
>It seemed to me like a worrying first sign that I had no chance to survive alone.
>Night falls. People are leaving the park like herds and for every person that left the more out of place I looked. A security guard was already looking at me suspiciously every now and then. I had to move.

>I needed to sleep somewhere, and the benches at the soccer field served as a perfect spot to do so. Lots of space to lay down in, with none of the visibility.
>But those metallic benches got cold as the night progressed. I tried to pull down my shirt as much as possible to avoid contact with the surface of the metal but it could only do so much.
>It would only get worse. Not only the bench, but now the air was too cold to handle. I rubbed arms furiously to create some heat but that too was useless.
>It was then that I heard Lincoln calling my name.
>"Lynn! Lynn! Where are you!?" He screamed, sadness and distress in his voice.
>I looked up and saw him alone, pointing around a flashlight. He was wearing a hat and a winter coat.
>No. This is a trap. There is absolutely no way in falling for it. If I let him know where I am then I would totally b-
>"Lincoln!!!"
>Ugh. Another point for the Lynnerino.
>"Lincoln, over here!" I stood up and waved my hands for him to see me.
>He called out my name and ran towards me. He hugged me with tears in his eyes.
>"Thank god, I found you, -sniff- I was worried sick about you."
>"Lincoln, how did you find me? Is anyone with you?"
>"No -sniff- it's just me. I knew you would come here. It's your favorite place." He wiped a tear from his eye with his finger.
>"How did you even get here?"
>"I borrowed your bike...sorry..."
>"No, don't be sorry. Thank you. If there's anyone I wanted to see it was you. Sit down. We need to talk."
>"Yeah, I figured we had to. Lynn, the police is looking for you. You've gone missing for almost a day now. Mom and Dad are really scared that something might have happened to you."

>"Mom and Dad...where are they? What about Luan?"
>"They are at the hospital. Luan is going to be fine, she just gonna have to stay there for a few weeks. Speaking of Luan, Lynn..."
>"I know," I sobbed, "I'm sorry. I do t know what came over me. It's just that I was so...angry! And I couldn't control it. I didn't mean to harm her...that much. God, Lincoln, what am I gonna do?" I laid my head on his lap for comfort. He reacted by petting my head softly.
>"Come back home, Lynn. Remember what Lori said? Well get through this together? That still applies, I think. Please, Lynn. You gotta help yourself."
>"Im sorry, Lincoln. I can't come back. What Luan did was wrong, yeah. But what I did to her, people go to jail for that. I deserve to go to jail. I might not actually go to jail because I'm not an adult, but there are methods for that. If I go back I'm done, brother. You or anyone else can't help me. If I ever go back, is to turn myself in. Nothing is gonna ever be the same."
>"Sigh, I thought you would say that." Lincoln undid his coat, revealing another jacket underneath. "This one is for you," he then proceeded to take some stuff from his pockets. He handed me some bags of chips, a pair of shorts, a $10 bill, and a walkie-talkie.
>"That's all I could carry. I would have stayed with you the night, but I have to go back home. Lori is staying at the hospital with Mom and Dad, so they left Leni in charge, and well, you know."
>"I understand. Thank you, Lincoln." I said as I hugged him.
>"You're welcome. Good luck, Lynn." He stepped down from the bench and began walking away, "oh by the way, don't play around with the white buttons and you might wind up talking to Clyde. See ya."
>And so Lincoln disappeared into the darkness, and I was alone again.

>A loud bang forced me eyes to open
>I woke up in a panic, thinking that I've been found. It could not have been more far away from reality.
>I was no longer inside the soccer field's stand. As a matter of fact, I was laying on the sidewalk across what used to be my home.
>To make things more confusing the sky looked rather alien. It was nighttime, but the sky was illuminated by something that looked like yellow lighting behind the cloudy night. I could also hear some melodious playing in the distance.
>I was clearly in a dream. I've never in my life been able to visualize a dream as detailed as the one I was experimenting at that very moment. It was beautiful and at the same time nerve-racking.
>Even though I knew then it was a dream I still didn't approach it as one. I did not have total control over my actions, and my mind and dream body were not fully connected.
>I approached my house carefully, being aware of how sudden dreams can turn on their heads and change completely.
>I knocked on the door three times, to no answer. A hopeful turn on the doorknob revealed the house to be unlocked.
>For a few moments I could not see anything as every single light inside was turned off. I could only hear a bass being played apathetically and lifeless.
>After my vision settled in, I saw Luna laying on the couch, carelessly playing random notes on the bass with suspenseful separation between every sound.
>I walked towards her to say hi but no words actually came out of my mouth, it appeared only her was allowed to talk.
>"Oh hey sister!" Luna out her bass away and sat up, "I've missed you, girl. Come give your sister a hug, eh?"
>Luna opened her arms invitingly. It might have been a dream, but I actually missed her too, so I sat on her lap and let her embrace me. It was rather comforting.

>"You shouldn't run away like that. I was so, so worried. You could have gotten kidnapped or something. That would have sucked..."
>10 seconds passed...20 seconds...30...I was now getting uncomfortable. She was still hugging me tight...then I felt her hand move from around my waist, slowly moving upwards...She giggled softly, in a way I've never heard from her before...
>And then she grabbed my breast.
>I tried to get off but she then pushed me down, her face dangerously close to my neck.
>"Hey Lynn...wanna have some fun? No one's watching..." She grabbed onto my shorts and pulled down
>"Luna, stop! Let me go!" I managed to get free from her hands and stood up away from her.
>"Come on, Lynn," she posed on the couch seductively, "I know you're into this kind of stuff..."
>She then came up to me and tried to kiss me. I immediately pushed her face away with my hand. Her instant reaction was to grab on my shirt and pull down crazily.
>"COME ON LYNN!" She yelled like a maniac, "DO THIS FOR ME!!! DON'T YOU SEE I'M ALONE NOW!!"
>I forced her hands off of me and pushed her with great force to the couch.
>She grabbed a cushion, held it tight to her body, and started screaming loudly. She twisted and turned on the couch still screaming, still hugging the cushion as if she was possessed.
>I needed to get away from her before she tried to kill me or something. I ran to the bottom of the stairs and yelled Lincoln's name, hoping he wound answer. Nothing.
>I ran upstairs to look for him. All the doors to the rooms were closed. All but Leni and Lori's, where a tiny ray of light peeked out of the door and illuminated the hallway.

>I opened the door just a little to see what was inside,
>It was them, naked one on top of another, aggressively having sex...
>"Hi, Lynn..." Leni turned her head at me.
>I immediately shut the door closed. I'm done with this dream. I want out.
>A loud bang came from behind me, making me jump like a scaredy cat. Three seconds later, another loud bang. It was coming from Luan and Luna's room.
>I approached that door like one would approach a sleeping bear. Heartbeats drumming in my head. I place my hand on the doorknob and
>BANG!
>An earth-shattering sound made me jump again.
>"FUCK THIS," I yelled, "LET ME OUT OF HERE I DONT LIKE THIS! WHY IS MY MIND DOING THIS!?"
>I looked down on the doorknob, and there was a bloody print of my hand in it.
>In terror, I took a step back, and blood started flowing down from under the door. The floor started to shake like an earthquake, I screamed in panic.
>The door bust, and a red tsunami came crashing at me, throwing me down the stairs.
>Then there was nothing.

>I woke up with my hand clutching at my heart, almost hyperventilating. Thankfully, the nightmare was finally over.
>The sun shone down at the park. I looked around and saw a few children running towards the kids' playground. I figured it was still the early hours of the day.
>"Lynn..." I heard Lincoln's voice coming from the walkie-talkie, "Lynn, come in..."
>"Hey, Lincoln, what's up? Good thing you call because I was having this terrible nightmare. Anyways, how are things? How is everyone doing...How's Luan?"
>"Um, yeah, that's what I needed to talk to you about Lynn, the thing is-"
>"Look. Tell Luan that I'm sorry. That i'm really, really sorry about what I did. That once things settle down and I can figure my life out, I'll make up for what I did."
>I grabbed a bag of chips laying beside me and started munching on them.
>"Lynn, listen to me, I'm at the hospital right now."
>"Then if you're right there you're not gonna have any difficulty telling her. Just do it trust me."
>"Uh...give me a moment..."
>"Lincoln? Lincoln!? Ugh. People in this family are impossible to talk to.
>I laid back down and continued eating my chips. No one is worth so much as to take time away from my snack time.
>While eating my chips I picked up some chatter from the radio, but I figured it wasn't directed at me.
>"...me? I'm talking to Clyde...I'm serious...Lori...No i'm not gonna give it to you...Lori!"
>wait something's going on
>"Lynn!" Lori's voice growled at me, as clear as day.
>oh fuck this ride doesn't end


>"Lynn! Just where the FUCK are you?! It's been more than a day! Are you out of your fucking mind!?"
>"Lori, I'm sorry-"
>"Don't fucking say you're sorry. It doesn't matter to me whether you are sorry or not after the shitshow you caused..." Lori paused for a moment, then continue to talk in a more muted tone, "Lynn, we have a bigger problem now. Luan...Last night Luan started coughing, then vomiting blood...so much that the doctors had to rush her out of the room. Internal Bleeding, a nurse told me, but it might be more than...She's in intensive care...If you'd see her right now, Lynn, you wouldn't even believe your eyes...
>Shock is a real thing. I couldn't even move, or say anything. Just waiting until Lori said something. It got extremely cold out of a sudden, like someone was running ice down my back.
>"Lynn..." I could hear her sniffling away from the radio, "I need you to come back. Mom's is devastated for so many reasons, and you disappearing only makes it worse.
>"Lynn..." she was sobbing, "I don't want Luan to die. And I don't want you to be treated like a murderer, -sniff-, "but, but, you need to be here, Lynn. For Luan. For Mom. For me, Lori. I thought I was tough enough to handle anything. But I'm losing it here. Please come back..."
>this wasn't supposed to happen.
>It wasn't supposed to develop like this. I did not intend for any of this to unravel in this downward spiral. Now my sister's life is hanging on a rope,
>and it's all my fault

>It's amazing how things can just lead to one another. How you can talk to your friend about what kind of puppies are the cutest, and 10 minutes later you find yourself discussing the shittiness of life. It's just a never-ending railroad of consequences. Whatever you do now, can change your life forever.
>Maybe one day you were too lazy bother walking two minutes to the 7-Eleven to buy milk. You didn't witness the clerk get robbed. You didn't out of sheer stupidity try to stop him. You didn't get murdered that day. Instead, you opted to shitpost on the internet and live another day.
>Three months ago I played my brother into having sex with me, and look at us now, my sister is in the hospital. I really wish I had made sense back then.
>It was a long ride to the hospital. I had to buy some candy with the $10 bill to get change for a bus, and in the process of buying said candy I missed it, so it was another hour of waiting at the stop. At the very least I had a chance to reflect. Think about what I did. How did I allow it to get this far.
>I hate hospitals. Every time I step into one I get a feeling of anxiety and depression, seeing all these people coming in, looking miserable and hopeless. Turns out I was among those miserable ones. I tried to focus and not look at anyone else but the front desk lady. This was one of these gigantic circular desks with five or six people working on it.
>"Hello," I tried to get the lady's attention who was typing away in a computer, "Uh...I'm looking for Luan, Luan Loud?"
>The lady looked at me for a second and continued working on the computer, "Are you Lynn." She asked apathetically.
>I answered yes. She looked at me for another moment, then rolled her desk chair to the opposite side of the desk, and picked up the phone to talk to someone.
>Which is very strange because she had a phone right next to her computer. After saying a few things the lady rolled back to her original place.

>It's amazing how things can just lead to one another. How you can talk to your friend about what kind of puppies are the cutest, and 10 minutes later you find yourself discussing the shittiness of life. It's just a never-ending railroad of consequences. Whatever you do now, can change your life forever.
>Maybe one day you were too lazy bother walking two minutes to the 7-Eleven to buy milk. You didn't witness the clerk get robbed. You didn't out of sheer stupidity try to stop him. You didn't get murdered that day. Instead, you opted to shitpost on the internet and live another day.
>Three months ago I played my brother into having sex with me, and look at us now, my sister is in the hospital. I really wish I had made sense back then.
>It was a long ride to the hospital. I had to buy some candy with the $10 bill to get change for a bus, and in the process of buying said candy I missed it, so it was another hour of waiting at the stop. At the very least I had a chance to reflect. Think about what I did. How did I allow it to get this far.
>I hate hospitals. Every time I step into one I get a feeling of anxiety and depression, seeing all these people coming in, looking miserable and hopeless. Turns out I was among those miserable ones. I tried to focus and not look at anyone else but the front desk lady. This was one of these gigantic circular desks with five or six people working on it.
>"Hello," I tried to get the lady's attention who was typing away in a computer, "Uh...I'm looking for Luan, Luan Loud?"
>The lady looked at me for a second and continued working on the computer, "Are you Lynn." She asked apathetically.
>I answered yes. She looked at me for another moment, then rolled her desk chair to the opposite side of the desk, and picked up the phone to talk to someone.
>Which is very strange because she had a phone right next to her computer. After saying a few things the lady rolled back to her original place.

>"You can't see her right now cause she's still recovering from last nights incident. She's in intensive care at the moment. What I can do is give you the room number where the rest of your family is."
>"Thanks. That'll do."
>There is some big conflict going on inside me. In one hand, I'm desperate to see my family again and hug each and every one of them individually. The other hand, keeps telling me that I was not going to be able to look at their faces and not be overwhelmed by shame.
>Regardless, I have to overcome my fears and take some responsibility for once. I'm done running away from my problems. I'm not gonna be a coward anymore.
>I could hear a lot of noise coming from the open door. A chaotic commotion like the one I'm used to listen to everyday. It only took that for me to feel a lot better. I was no longer afraid of showing my face...at least not as much.
>Looking around the door, I saw all 10 of my siblings minus obviously one. All in their own way trying to accommodate themselves and make a rather somber place like a hospital a cheerful space. Lola was playing with her dolls on the floor, Lana was chasing Geo, our hamster, Luna was strumming her guitar and singing a song for Mom and lil' Lily who were sitting on the bed. Lucy was hiding under the bed for some reason, Lisa was making sure the medical equipment was properly clean, everyone was doing their own thing, honoring their last name.
>"H-hey guys..." I said timidly Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked at me, "How are you guys doing?...
>It's was like time stopped completely. Everyone was quiet. Nobody dared to speak a word. They all just turned to each other hoping someone would talk.
>"Lynn..." said Lola, still holding onto her dolls, "You-you're back."
>"Yeah, uh, I'm back. I wanted to see you guys. And Mom too...hi Mom..." I tried awkwardly to wave at her but all I did was to raise my hand a tad and that's it.
>Mom handed Lily to Luna and stepped up to me with hands down low. I opened my arms to try to get her to hug me. She hesitated. My own mother hesitated to hug me. Her face looked extremely conflicted, but she closed her eyes and hugged me anyways.
>It was the worst hug I've ever been given.

>"Mom, do you still love me?" I asked her during our embrace.
>"I still love you sweetheart, I'm just...trying to understand. How could you do something like this."
>She let go of the hug but I kept hold of her hands. I still needed her contact.
>"You're not the only one trying to understand. I don't know either. I never thought I was capable of doing that to my own sister. It's not something that I would never do in my right mind, and I'm sorry."
>I could see Mom wanted to believe me , but I could also see that a part of her still felt some darkness within me.
>"Where's dad anyways? He's not here." I only then noticed.
>"Your father is talking to someone, dear. He'll be back soon, I think."
>I saw Lori laying back on a far corner of the room. She was hunched back and looking out the window with her arms crossed, as if she was trying to hide in plain sight
>"Lori," I called her out, "You-you called me. You wanted me to come back. But you haven't even said hi. I thought you wanted to see me. Why haven't you even said anything to me?"
>Lori looked at me for a moment, closed her eyes, and sighed deeply. She then sluggishly unstuck herself from the wall and walked towards me. She looked extremely sad and worried. Something was not quite right.
>"Hey, Lynn. A-are you alright? D-did you have any trouble getting here?"
>"Just a missed bus. I'm fine..."

>It was then when Luan was pushed in-in a wheelchair by a nurse. The entire family, except me, rush to meet her.
>They all looked so happy. Many hugs, laughs going around and about, so much love that I didn't feel I belonged in.
>I couldn't bring myself to see her, I just quietly turned around and headed for a chair to sit on and be alone.
>"Lynn." Luan called me out before I could sit. "Lynn, come here. I missed you too."
>The entire family stepped away from Luan. Suddenly, it was only me and her and no one else.
>Why does she miss me? Why is she being so nice out of a sudden after all she did? After what I did?
>I awkwardly moved closer to her. Everyone was watching me. Waiting to see what would happen. What we could possibly say to each other. I had no idea what to say, actually.
>"So you're not gonna give your sister a hug? You can't "stand" me being on a wheelchair? I must say that isn't very nice, come on!"
>Luan, quite unbelievably so, looked and sounded completely genuine, which is remarkable from someone who you must take everything with a grain of salt. But the way she smiled and opened her arms at me is not something that I could say no to.
>"I'm sorry." I whispered to her.
>"I'm sorry too. But I forgive you." She whispered back.
>It looked like there weren't any hard feelings between me and Luan anymore. We both wronged each other and apologized.
>If only that was the end of my problems.

>"Ow, ow, ribs, broken, ouch." Luan winced in pain.
>"Oh god, sorry." I let go of her immediately. I might have hugged a but too strongly because she seemed like something was bothering her again.
>"So, I heard about yesterday. Are you sure you're okay?" I asked her.
>"Well, the doctors said I could go back to my room. So I guess I am. Yesterday was crazy. I was just talking to Mom before I tried to get some sleep, and suddenly I had some sort of attack. I might have passed out cause I don't remember anything. I only remember waking up today in a different room, plugged into a machine."
>"That sucks. But I'm glad it was just a scare."
>Someone started tapping me in the shoulder. I turned around to see Lincoln, who had been lost among the watchful eyes, and didn't even notice he was there.
>"Lincoln!" I squeezed the living hell out him, "Thanks for keeping an eye on me, bro. I really owe you one."
>"It's nothing, Lynn. We're in this mess together, it's the least I could have done. You don't have to owe me anything."
>"I don't know, Lincoln. Maybe later today I can return the favor somehow, if you know what I mean." I said as I tickled him around.
>"Lynn! Not here!" He mouthed at me, trying to discreetly create some distance.
>"I'm just fucking with you, bro." I kept a smug smile throughout. Lincoln looked back at me with dead eyes. I think he got the joke. Lori rolled her eyes from her corner, while Luan looked at me with approval.
>Everything around me seemed to fill with color again. What only a few minutes ago felt like coldness, awkwardness, and tension, was being being replaced with love and warmth.
>Seeing Lincoln again was probably the major factor there.
>It seemed for a moment that  everything was heading for the worse. It only now seems stupid that for more than a day I felt like running away from home permanently was a sound decision.

>Mom gathered all of us so we could talk about the situation at hand. She talked to us about what it takes to be a sibling, why we always care for each other, and that things like this should never happen again. During all of the discussion I sat in between Lincoln and Luan, holding hands with both of them, a little awkwardly as I had to keep my right hand constantly raised to reach the armrest of Luan's wheelchair. It was then when Dad ran in with tears in his eyes as soon as he saw me back with them.
>This whole ordeal has drawn all of is a little closer together; Luan, Lincoln and I. Which is impressive because the relationship between me and Luan was always sort of awkward, as in yes, we're sisters, but we don't share much.
>Shortly after Luan recovered from her injuries, we'd spend many nights together. Whether it was talking nonsense in Lincoln's room, recording videos together for Luan's channel in the dark, or cuddling up together inside the same blanket on the couch, watching a movie.
>Admittedly sometimes this cuddling sessions may have gotten a little out of hand a couple of times. Luan openly admitted to us that what we did sort of turned her on, but we knew better than to push it too far, as a repeat of all this down-spiraling sack of bullshit was not something anyone wanted.
>Still, I enjoyed it, I must admit. I guess some things don't change. The contact, the warmth, the love, is something that I've become a little too addicted to. Every now and then we'd run hands under each other's clothes, not for anything sexual , but for the skin contact that now feels like a drug. The warm air flowing from their breaths. The quiet giggling resulting from the joy of cuddling. All of those things became our breath and butter.
>Lori would catch us doing this sometimes, but she preferred to ignore it. To her, it just wasn't worth the trouble just to be a Puritan over something that might not even be there.
>I regret many things in life, and wish some things could have gone differently, but in the end I earned something special.that makes everything worth it,
>A special kind of love