$name : Game of thrones, piss to boil
$author : Keb @bjfrith
$description : Make your own Game of Thrones boiled piss post!
$amount : 1
$button : Let’s boil some more piss.

$character
The Mountain
Olenna (who sucks)
the wrong Arys Oakheart
Yara Greyjoy
Hodor
Lady Stoneheart
Ser Jorah Mormont
Tyrion
Tywin
Tyrene
every 7-cost character so far
weenies
Cressen

$situation
duping the arbor on setup
a field of 90% Lannister players
banning women from tournaments
alt art cards
Sansa Stark’s underage boobies
Melisandre’s elderly titties
Dany’s perfect knockers
page 37 of the rulebook
1.0 elitism
spamming pictures of Trump
bad art
yelling much and more
duping on setup
spoiling last night’s episode
spoilers from book 1
bulling Sternly
too much moderation
a mod with a heavy ban hammer
people selling shitty tokens
having only one deck after getting robbed
a deluge of low-quality podcasts
power tokens shaped like nipples
naming your bastard children after Thrones players
quitting OCTGN without typing ‘gg’
ragequitting
forgetting to buy Bronn back
a negative play experience
IDing to ensure you and your friends make the cut
cheating with gold tokens
hiding Bob up your sleeve
sharing a room with a wiedo
the limited keyword
a tourney report with pictures
calling other players ‘faggot’
inventing house rules
whispering ‘cunt’ under your breath
sneaking alcohol into a store that banned it
rubbing crumpets on my nipples
winning by default by being the only player
using the PA system to sing opera in a castle
sleeping, eyes open, on a livestream
playing footsie during a joust
cheating while being filmed
forgetting to pay for Stahleck
communicating in code at a melee table
AGOT cards going down again
putting 8 plots in your plot deck
an efficient 61-card deck
military challenges when Robb Stark is in play
putting all my cards in neat binders
dropping a tourney after two consecutive losses
submarining to a shocking victory
stealing another player’s girlfriend
calling the Martells ‘Sandpeople’
thinking Lannister requires skill to play
going out to buy bogroll and coming home with True Steel

$cards
A gift of Arbor red
Much and More
the Arbor
Cersei’s wheelhouse
Lord of the Crossing
Without his Beard
Marched to the Wall
First Snow
Valar Morghulis
Ser Jorah Mormont
Tyrion
Tywin
Tyrene
Davos (who has stealth)
Big, Bad, Kneely Bob
the Disney brothel
the wrong Arys Oakheart

$words
you’re wrong.
“SHUT UP.”
“MUCH AND MORE!”
I could get banned from the group for that.
the female body is art.
“Vote for Trump”
I was wrong.
nothing, just shed a tear for the Great Wave of 2014.
“I’m not your friend, Pal.”
“I can intrigue challenge you in over seven hundred ways.”
“I extensively trained in Tyrell combat.”
“CENSORSHIP!”
“Ban that player, please.”
“I take three gold, you get NOTHING.”
“Will you talk about this on my podcast?”
I trigger the Mander.
“…confession?”
“MELISANDRE!!!!” *shakes fist*
“Fifteen power. I win, good day sir.”

$negative
got all your cards stolen
put your passport through the washing machine
slept with a randomer from Manchester
drowned in a Dutch canal
Tried Pulling the Strings on Trading with the Pentoshi
cried when you lost
deleted your posts after being proved wrong
got DQed for IDing
found yourself on the banned player list
got fat from eating fast food at every tourney
died of alcohol poisoning at Stahleck
made the cut with a hangover
blocked another player on Facebook
cried when I use [card]
were a spy, every time
accidentally shreded your copies of [character]
dropped your Greyjoy deck in the bath
wore a team shirt
called the judge ‘narrow-minded’
fed your Stark deck to your dog
punched a local
spilled beer on your top Baratheon deck
realised your Martell deck has no banter
wore formal wear to a piss-up
realised your visa ran out
boiled your own piss
sang [‘Rains of Castermere’|’Bear and the Maiden Fair’] at 6am
forgot to book a taxi back
ruined a picturesque German village
decided to worship [the Seven|the great Stallion|the many-faced God|R’llor]
ate a [kebab shop|sauerkraut|a big slaughterplate at the slaughter fesival]
talked about [Magic|Pokemon|Yu Gi Oh|Wrestlemania] too much
proclaimed yourself King
pretended to be blind to use cards with braille

$event
Worlds
Gencon
Stahleck
Warsaw
Blackwater
the Road to Stahleck
your local Game Night Kit
Seaham
Manchester
Stockton
DC

$gamestate
dupe the arbor
draw [2-20000] cards
buy yourself a Bronn
blank Tywin
kill Tyrene
remove poison tokens
kill every character
remove Varys from the game
burn every character to 0 strength
kneel every character
restart the marshalling phase
skip the taxation phase

$people
YEEZUS
OldShrimpEyes
the presenters of Banter Behind the Throne
Wamma
Wedge
a player with no obvious gender
the presenters of Brotherhood without Manners
the presenters of Beards of Westerns
the moderators
a salty OCTGN opponent
this Northen lad
an angry Scotsman
a bearded weirdo
DC Dennis
Karma
a shadow cat pretending to be a player
a female player
the store owner
Greg Aitkinson
Nate French
a moderator itching to drop the ban hammer
the illistrator
Keb
Dave Bamford
Le Plant
Dragonbro
Tomasz
the English player with bad teeth
Americans who will vote for Trump
drunk Polish people
a scary-looking Dutch man
an attractive Frenchman
Spanish men with wandering hands
a huge group of noisy Italians
Khal Pollard
Eddie from Stoke
Emperor Octavius, aka Bryan
Tom Clark, former UK champion
the world’s best Baratheon player
Anti-banter
Peel
Tagore (you know, the idiot)
Chewy

$phrase
I have a rules question about [situation].
I have a rules question about [card].
Is there an action window between playing [cards] and triggering [character]?
Personally, I have no problem with [situation].
Can you dupe [cards] in setup?
I asked [people] and they said [words]
The only way to deal with [situation] is [cards].
When I played [cards], my opponent said [words]
If you’re okay with [situation], you should have [negative].
well [people] said you can’t come to [event] because you [negative].
I think if I [negative] I’d ask [people] for advice.
The TV show ruined book [character].
I knew [event] was over when you [negative].
The worst thing about AGOT is [situation].
If you’re capable of [situation], I’ll report you to [people].
I’d rather drop from a tourney than play [people].
Do you think that [people] might be a bit too keen on [situation]?
I always thought [cards] was better than [cards] to have on setup.
The worst in the [event] meta could be [people].
The only thing I have to say about [situation] is [words].
How many copies of [cards] can you play on setup?
I say [cards] would be better if you could use it to [gamestate].
I said [words], so [people] said [words].