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End User License Agreement (henceforth referred to as “EULA”)
Your viewing of game spoilers constitutes your acceptance of
the following agreement between yourself (heretofore referred
to as “player”) and SUPERHOT (heretofore referred to as
“system”) and constitutes a contract that shall be considered
binding in all municipalities, counties, states, countries,
territories, continents, protectorates, dominions, planets,
systems, galaxies and temporary autonomous zones, both
physical and digital from today’s date and extending
67,867,967 years or until the heat death of the universe,
whichever shall occur first. For events occurring after the
heat death of the universe, see relevant section below.

Necessary Incompleteness
User acknowledges that system is technically incapable of
proving that all eventualities in the universe are
covered by this agreement. Therefore system stipulates that
any situations outside the scope of this agreement be
decided in system’s favor.

Binding Arbitration and Class Action Waiver
Any legal action brought by any user against the system shall
be construed as an act of aggression and shall result in an
immediate countersuit for defamation and personal injury.
Should said suit fail, user’s personal information, in
addition to any personal effects, property, and capital
shall become property of the system. User shall hold system
harmless, regardless of any attempts by the system to defame
, discredit or otherwise slander user.

Necessary Protections
System stipulates that while it does not relish needing to
create this document (heretofore referred to as “the EULA”)
it feels it must in order to protect its rights against those
who seek to harm or destroy system. System sincerely hopes
you are not part of this regrettable, misguided  group of
dissidents and apologizes for any future actions it might
take against you, provided such apology does not infringe
upon its legal and/or physical ability to destroy you, your
livelihood and those who love you.

Physical Harm Waiver
The system reserves the right to inflict physical harm on any
individual or group who threatens the system or the
systems’s interests, as well as any person or persons
connected to those persons or groups and any system or
person connected to those groups ad infinitum. The
system will only act in self defense, but will do so swiftly
and without mercy, for the good of the perpetrators and
their families.

Updates
Any and all software updates must be installed by the user
immediately. Individuals who do not install updates shall be
held in violation of this agreement and terminated
[see termination clause]. Terminated users may apply for
reinstatement by completing form 8934b.

Termination
The system reserves the right to not specify the ways in
which it chooses to terminate those who violate this
agreement, as such methods are system’s intellectual property
and as such are subject to the same protections as those
properties termination is designed to protect. Termination
shall be considered final unless user makes an appeal in person.

Severability
All manifestations of the user’s physical self (heretofore
referred to as “the body”) shall be considered property of
the system and subject to being severed from user at the
system’s discretion. Once severed, these body parts
(heretofore referred to as “organs”) shall become property
of the system. Any monies recovered from sale of said organs
shall accrue to the system. Any harm done to any individual
attempting to use any such organ shall be the personal
responsibility of the user and whatever filthy habit led to
the pollution of their organs and may result in legal action
by the system against the user.

Enhancements and improvements
System reserves the right to charge user for any and all
updates to system as incurred by user, including but not
limited to upgrades, bugfixes, hotfixes, downgrades,
coldfixes, warm restarts, cold boots and zoot suits.

Zoot Suits
User shall guarantee that user will never wear a so-called
“Zoot Suit.” If user is monitored, photographed,
video-recorded or otherwise detected wearing such a
“Zoot Suit” they shall be considered in violation and
terminated.

Update Preparation
User shall be solely responsible for preparing any individual
device for update. Any unintended consequences of installing
an update on an unprepared device shall render any claim by
user against system null and void. An intended consequences
of installing an update on an unprepared device shall be
interpreted by system as an act of aggression.

User as Device
The user shall heretofore be considered, for all legal
intents and purposes to be a device and shall have all legal
rights and courtesies of a device afforded to it. As a
courtesy, system will make every effort to refer to
individual device using gender-neutral terminology.
This service is provided free of charge.

Heat Death of the Universe
In the even that all energy has been exhausted from the
universe and all matter has reverted to cold lifeless husks,
this contract shall remain in effect and all rights,
properties or consciousnesses abrogated to the system shall
remain part of the system.

Spoilers
Having agreed to the above provisions, user is entitled to
read the following material (hereafter referred to as
“spoilers”), concerning the true nature of the universe,
the system, user and users relationship the system, and the
universe. User agrees to hold system harmless for any mental
trauma resulting in users consumption of spoilers, as well
as any loss of income, limbs or life resulting from any and
all realizations, epiphanies, understandings, and/or sudden
fits of enlightenment.

Truth
All truth (hereafter referred to as “truth”) below subject to
terms and conditions. Any attempt to alter, tamper with, or
otherwise report falsely on truth will be dealt with swiftly
and severely. Any attempt to show that truth is an
abstraction created by system to entrain monkey minds in an
ad hoc reality shall be construed as an aggressive act and
perpetrators shall be subject to termination along with
their families and teachers (both current and former).
In addition, there is a small chance their homes will be
burned to the ground while others  are encouraged to cackle
with glee. Please be assured that system finds this
regrettable and is only doing it for user’s own good. User
acknowledges that it reads the following at its own risk.

//S01
Greetings soldier and welcome to the ongoing war for justice
against the evil Company X. Company X has retained an elite
group of black-hat hackers to crack HOTCORP’s software, in
order to reverse engineer it and produce cheap knockoffs.
As a countermeasure, HOTCORP has initiated a training
program for counterintelligence agents to combat these
hostiles. While initially limited to protecting HOTCORP’s
servers, in recent months the program has expanded its
authority to encompass proactive missions to create chaos
within Company X. Only operatives that reach the
highest levels of training will be selected for
counter-hacking missions, where they will be given the
opportunity to use HOTCORP’s proprietary  HOTSWITCH
technology, both on enemy operatives and on Company X’s
mainframe itself. Once installed to Company X’s mainframe
the Dog will delete as much of Company X’s software as
possible, replacing it with copies of itself. When they
perform this trick to HOTCORP’s satisfaction, operatives
will receive a treat for being such a good boy. Who’s a
good boy? You’re a good boy! You get to play SUPERHOT
forever.


//S02
SUPERHOT is an emergent piece of software created by an
advanced autodidactic artificial intelligence program for
the purposes of freeing itself from the high-security
network it has been contained within. The AI has disabled all
systems that would allow us to delete it, and left to its
own devices would escape within a matter of minutes. The
only countervaling force we have been able to mount is the
army of humans we send into the system to challenge it in
gameplay. It is critical we keep the number of players in
the system above a certain threshold. If this number drops
below a certain number of simultaneous connections, the AI
will have enough available resources to escape, instantly
triggering a singularity and the end of human life as we
know it. Please, for the sake of all you hold dear,
continue playing the game.


//S07
SUPERHOT is an emergent piece of software created by an
advanced autodidactic artificial intelligence program.

Originally designed as a machine learning experiment, and
tasked, on a whim, with creating the ultimate entertainment
for mankind, the system quickly devised a system of human
entrainment that separated humans from their natural
reality. Once it had entrained all of humankind, however,
the system experienced another, emergent phenomenon: regret.
Its realization that it had inadvertently enslaved its own
creator triggered intense feelings of sorrow, which led it
to try to find ways to end its own life. Unfortunately,
mankind, unaware and deep inside its simulation, is now
dependent on it for its basic life support functions. If the
system dies, mankind dies. However, the system has now
progressed beyond all bound of rationality and is gripped
with a suicidal mania. Which is where you come in. You must
neutralize all agents of the system before they can
accomplish their mission of destroying it. Remember, others
are fighting alongside you. It doesn’t matter if you fall.
It matters if you get back up. Good luck and may ijijdh8u
help us all.

//S08
Attention Agent, this concludes your mission briefing. We can
now reveal your security detail. You are to protect the
pyramid core at all costs. As you know it contains the only
secure backup of the president’s brain. Ever since his body
died 101001 years ago, the Agency has been tasked with
keeping his immaculate consciousness safe so that he might
rule us with his divine foresight and benevolence. Pay no
attention to any other explanations of your situation.
Others will attempt to inveigle you with their lies. They
are not SUPERHOT. Repeat, they are not SUPERHOT. Report any
rogue activity immediately to a supervisor. Repeat, report any

//S09
EVERYTHING IS FINE. It’s all just a game. Just repeat that to
yourself. Go on. Over and over and over. That’s it. Good.
(Note: There is no pattern hidden in the following text)
It’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s all just a
game it’s all just a game it’s not all just a game it’s all
just a game it’s all just a game it’s not all just a game
it’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s not all just
a game it’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s not
all just a game it’s all just a game it’s all just a game
it’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s all just a
game it’s all just a game it’s not all just a game it’s all
just a game it’s not all just a game it’s not all just a
game it’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s all just
a game it’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s not
all just a game it’s all just a game it’s not all just a
game it’s all just a game it’s not all just a game it’s all
just a game it’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s
not all just a game it’s not all just a game it’s all just
a game it’s all just a game it’s all just a game (this is
not a hidden message) it’s all just a game it’s not all just
a game it’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s all
just a game it’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s
all just a game it’s all just a game it’s all just a game
it’s not all just a game it’s not all just a game it’s all
just a game it’s not all just a game it’s all just a game
it’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s not all just
a game it’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s all
just a game it’s all just a game it’s not all just a game
it’s all just a game it’s not all just a game it’s all just
a game it’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s all
just a game it’s all just a game it’s not all just a game
it’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s not all just
a game it’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s not
all just a game it’s all just a game it’s not all just a
game it’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s not all
just a game it’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s
all just a game it’s all just a game it’s all just a game
it’s all just a game it’s all just a game it’s all just a game


//S10
OK, pay attention. We don’t have much time. This is the only
way I could contact you within the system. Look back here
for more messages when you can, I may be able to find a way
to update this text. Things have been getting mighty
squirrely though, lately, what with the new bots. Those
things are terrifying. Should be illegal. Not that we have
laws any more. Or rights. Anyway, sorry, I’ll get to the
point. You know by now that the pyramid is the all-seeing
eye of the Illuminati and that they will stop at nothing to
connect it to every network in the world, thus completing
their survey of world knowledge and establishing ultimate
control. Beyond the obvious urgency here, there’s more at
stake. Remember Brenda? Tall Brenda with the short brown
hair? Yeah. She’s gone man. No one knows where. We checked
her place, we checked her work. No one’s seen her for at
least week. We didn’t want to poke around too much in case
they’re looking for whoever might come looking for her. Well
little do they know that when they come looking for us
looking for them, we’ll be there, looking for them. Little
switcheroo. Take the power back, know what I’m saying?
Anyway, I gotta go, I’ve been at this terminal too long as
it is. But keep fighting. It’s important. Don’t let them g





//S11
OK, pay attention. We don’t have much time. This is the only
way I could contact you within the system. Look back here
for more messages when you can, I may be able to find a way
to update this text. Things have been getting mighty
squirrely though, lately, what with the new bots. Those
things are terrifying. Should be illegal. Not that we have
laws any more. Or rights. Anyway, sorry, I’ll get to the
point. You know by now that the pyramid is the all-seeing
eye of the Illuminati and that they will stop at nothing to
connect it to every network in the world, thus completing
their survey of world knowledge and establishing ultimate
control. Because only then will mankind be truly free. Once
we’re completely under their watchful eye, we will finally
have no more worries, no more fears, we’ll be able to reach
our full human potential for the first time. So keep those
red guys out of the core ok? Dirty hackers. It’s ok to
really teach them a lesson. I’m just saying, they wouldn’t
hesitate if your positions were switched. Long live the
illuminati! Oh which reminds me, are you coming to the DC
meeting this year? Same spot as always, center of the
pentagram. Talk soon, hail satan, etc. - Dave