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- >Used to be a great burglar.
- >Now a decent burglar and fantastic fluffy abuser.
- >Sat in car outside previous heist's house.
- >Saw him return from vet with newly-amputated fluffy.
- >Saw fluffy sobbing, begging for "weggies" to come back.
- >Delicious delicious tears.
- >One week later, plan a double-heist.
- >Neighbors of previous house have fluffies too.
- >Wait for both families to leave for work.
- >Break into house, easy as before.
- >Legless fluffy recognizes you.
- >"Fwend?" he coos from the litter box. He wriggles helplessly.
- >"No! Fwend, pwese go! You make fwuffy make bad-poopies! Pwese weve fwuffy awone!"
- >You reveal a plate of hot spaghetti with marinera.
- >Fluffy pony's eyes go wide with hunger.
- >"Sketties??"
- >"Yep!" You place the plate on the far side of the room.
- >Pick fluffy out of litterbox and place him halfway to the plate.
- >He immediately tries crawling, but can barely move with no legs.
- >"Wan'... sketties!" He's wiggling and shaking his way to the plate.
- >Barely a centimeter moved with each struggle.
- >You've got plenty of time.
- >Leave and hop into the backyard next door.
- >Those fools let their fluffies play in the backyard while they're out.
- >Two fluffy ponies, a colt and a very pregnant mare.
- >You weren't expecting two fluffy ponies, much less a pregnant one!
- >You get to improvise!
- >"New fwend?" the mare coos at the sight of you.
- >The colt runs up to you excitedly, the mare wiggles her legs that don't reach the ground.
- >"New fwend! Pway? Fwuffy wanna pway tag!"
- >You kneel down next to the colt and whisper into his ear.
- >"Are you the father?" you gesture to the pregnant mare.
- >He blinks in confusion. "Whu?"
- >"Did you give her special hugs?"
- >"Oh!" he smiles. "Yeah! Fwuffy give good speciaw hugs! Fwuffy gonna be mummah now!"
- >"You know, when she has the babies, your daddy won't love you anymore."
- >He frowns. "Whu? Daddy wuv fwuffy!"
- >"Now he does, but he won't once the babies are born. They and the mommy will get all the attention."
- >You tustle his hair as he looks at the mare in confusion.
- >"They'll probably throw you back in the street. Those babies will get all the love. You'll get nothing."
- >"No.." the colt snifs. "Fwuffy... babehs make daddy no wuv fwuffy?"
- >"Yep. Your comfy life is about to end."
- >"No!!" he cries. The colt charges back to the mare.
- >"No haf' babehs!" he insists. "No wan' babehs no more! No haf' babehs!"
- >The mare stares in confusion. "Huh? Mummah wuv babehs! Fwuffy no wuv babehs?"
- >"No! No wuv babehs!"
- >He headbutts the mare in her swollen side.
- >"Owie!" she cries. "No! Yuu huwt babehs! No huwt!"
- >"No babehs!" the colt shrieks. "Fwuffy hate babehs! Fwuffy hate yuu!"
- >He keeps headbutting her as she cries helplessly.
- >He tears off some of her fluff.
- >"No!" the mare sobs. "Hewp! Mummah need hewp! Pwese, no huwt babehs!"
- >"NO BABEHS!" the colt screams bloody murder.
- >You can't help but cackle as you hop back over the fence.
- >Return to your favorite legless fluffy.
- >Amazing! He got to the plate and ate all the spaghetti.
- >But now he's full, and struggling to return to his litter box.
- >"Need... poopies. Need ... wittabox! No... no poopies on fwoor!"
- >He spots you and begs for help.
- >"Fwend! Hewp! Need poopies in witterbox! Fwuffy get in twouble if poopies on fwoor!"
- >You stand and watch him silently.
- >"Fwend?"
- >You don't even blink.
- >He sniffles and cries as he struggles across the floor.
- >Before he's even halfway there, he squints and cries. "Noo!"
- >Yep.. he just pooped. He can't even turn around to see the mess he made.
- >He gives up his struggle, and just sobs on the floor.
- >"Acciden'... poopies acciden'... no huwt fwuffy..."
- >Pick up the plate; hide all evidence.
- >Fluffy cries hysterically as you exit through the window.
- >Sit in your car in front of both houses. Wait for families to return.
- >Hear owner scream at legless fluffy from outside.
- >"AGAIN?! STAY IN THE FUCKING LITTERBOX!! I ALREADY REMOVED YOUR LEGS, MAYBE I SHOULD DUCT-TAPE YOU TO THE FUCKING BOX!"
- >A pause.
- >"STOP LYING TO ME, YOU FUCKER!! NOBODY WAS HERE! YOU'RE A LYING STUPID FUCKING RODENT!"
- >Second owner comes home.
- >Silence at first. After half an hour, the owner comes out with the colt in hand.
- >Throws the fluffy into the garbage without a word.
- >"No!!" the colt cries. "Babehs take fwuffy's wuv! Pwese, daddy! No more babehs! Daddy s'ill wuv fwuffy!"
- >Owner is crying as he goes back inside.
- >Sneak up to house, peer into backyard.
- >The owner is digging a hole. The mother is whimpering as she tries to feed her mutilated foals.
- >"Babehs pwese! Need miwkies! Pwese eat, babehs!"
- >The foals are barely recognizable. You realize the colt must've headbutted the mare into labor.
- >As soon as those foals came out, he probably stomped on them. One's missing a head. One's gashed open all over.
- >Just little blobs of flesh and guts. And the mare's still desperately trying to feed them.
- >The owner scoops the foal remains into the hole, and starts burying them as the mare sobs.
- >"NO! Daddy no take babehs! Babehs need mummah! Pwese daddy! Babehs! Pwese!"
- >Both the owner and mother cry as he pats the last bit of soil over the dead babies.
- >Have to run back to front of house before you cackle too loudly.
- >Colt's still crying in garbage can.
- >"No wuv babehs! Daddy! Fwuffy be good! Pwese! Wuv fwuffy, no wuv babehs!"
- >You pick the colt out of the garbage can. He's crying to hard to really notice.
- >Throw him into your trunk.
- >"We're going to have sooo much funnnn!"
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