TOM (Part 7) Monologue

Welcome, United States faithful, to the Wacky Races! I'm the Toonami Operations Module; but you can just call me TOM for short.

I'll be broadcasting and commentating this race from beginning to end. And, as always, the action's completely uncut! Who needs censors when you've got the thumbs up from the Oval Office?

All of our racers are competing for a nice, solid, 50 million dollars, and they'll do anything it takes to get it! Our President, Mr. Nobody, has assured us that this race has no other secondary purposes besides entertaining the American people, and is definitely NOT a front for collecting weird, ancient artifacts...

...huh. His exact words. (sarcastic) Well, THAT doesn't sound suspicious at all.

(realizing that he just shat on the race on live TV) ...oh, is the mic still on? Uh, anyway, we're heading to the starting line, where a nearby interviewer is ready to talk to our racers before we kick this thing off. (regains his usual composure) Don't go anywhere! We'll be right back with the Wacky Races: only on Toonami.

(mic is now off)

I swear, Nobody gets more and more suspicious every time he's in the headlines. Just how did he get elected, anyway? Since I'm a「Stand」user myself, I guess that might be part of it. And that only raises another question: just how many racers also have Stands? ...ah, well. The gig comes first.

That doesn't mean that I can't do a little snooping around, though.