Her: tell me something personal. related to dating/relationships/love/loneliness

Me: Hmmm... that's a pretty big category hahaha

UhHhHhHh well I guess you should know that sex is pretty low down on my list of priorities in a relationship

Her: alright

Me: Like, if it happens, it happens, and that's okay, but I don't actively seek it. I'm in the business of kissing and holding hands and cuddling and sharing dreams and secrets and esoteric thoughts and laughing at strangers mutually and telling crazy stories about our day and all that kinda nonsense.

Which is cheesy, I know, but nice to think about :3

10:45pm

Her: nah that's cute

have you ever been hurt before?

Me: Yeeeeeah.

Only been in one relationship in my life and it was probably the best 3 months I've had

But then she out of the blue decided she was bored with it and peaced out :(

So yeah, that messed me up for a little while. Especially since there was no real buildup to it :O

We were just going amazingly and I told her all the time how neat I thought she was and she just went "Oh by the way, disregard ALL that"

Her: wow

10:50pm

that bitch

girls are really stupid sometimes and they do and say stupid shit

Me: Haha, I'm starting to see from that perspective a bit, yeah

But for the first year or so I was just wracking my brain to try to figure out where my wrong step was

But yeah. She was my first date, first kiss, everything. :(

How about yourself? Any *~*~personal~*~* details to share? :P

Her: i guess i brought it up 'cause i was thinking about it just now

how i don't want to date or at least i think that

but then i ask myself what the heck i'm doing on a dating site if that's the case

and idk..i confuse myself

Me: Haha, well, I dunno, I mean, I'm pretty biased

10:55pm

The way it ended did mess me up a little bit but for those three months it was literally the best thing that'd ever happened. I finally had somewhere to dump all my hopeless romanticism and it was appreciated and returned in kind. :3

Her: my relationships have always been a mess

and it's usually my fault

Me: How do you figure?

Her: so i guess i'm sparing guys from heartbreak and nonsense by avoiding dating

i never feel good enough for other people

so i tend to run away or hide my feelings or i struggle to express my feelings

and that usually frustrates guys and it sucks because they're honest with me but i'm too scared to reciprocate

Me: I mean, if I'm being honest with you, I'm inclined to say that's non sense

You have all these awesome skills and talents and you draw like a genius, and you have interesting and unique interests and a bubbly personality, plus you're adorable and open and kind and just a badass in general

11:00pm

And this is all stuff I've picked up without even knowing you in person, just through the things you've done and shown

It boggles my mind HOW you would think you're not good enough for people, and it's a really really sad thing to hear.

Hell, I was looking through your website earlier when you linked it, and I had to keep stopping to just marvel at how good you were at SO many different and varied things. Everything you do just... glows :P

Her: haha thanks :) and i could return a lot of those compliments back to you b

but i'm the type of girl who won't change her perception of herself with a few compliments from people

i think there's a deeper issue but i'm not about to delve into that

11:05pm

and all those things i've done/accomplished - that's a result of me trying to keep busy so i won't feel lonely

Me: I can relate to that. I tend to have trouble taking any sort of praise seriously. I usually think people are just being polite when they compliment me or something I've done.

Her: yup but i assure you my compliments to you are genuine and honest :)

Me: Hahaha. I believe you. :P

Her: I'm going to go draw for a bit. Easier for me to kind of express myself and clear my head I guess

I'll talk to you later if you're still awake

11:11pm

Me: I will be. :P Have fun, don't think too much. ;D