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- >Celestia lays back on your reclining chair as you sit next to her.
- >Using her hoof, she scoops up a hoofful of popcorn, and shoves it into her mouth.
- >Smacking loudly, she gets up slightly, and points, "Ok, ok, right there.."
- >You look at the screen as a mare has her coat taken off by a stallion, who promptly tosses it onto the couch. The stallion walks over to the counter, and brings out two glasses, "So what're ya havin? How about a nice COCK-tail."
- >Celestia grimaces, and shakes her hoof into the air, "See, in the ORIGINAL, he takes her coat, tosses into onto the couch, and while walking OVER to the counter, he asks that. But only in the original, he honestly asks it to find out about her more. The romance was much more slowly built, and paced than this rehash garbage. *sigh* There was never any mating in the original."
- "Oh yeah?"
- >"YES! Every film now HAS to have mating, even if it does nothing to drive the story forward. Back then, films had story, and a budding romance, with an ending that implied they mated later. But those films were good, now its all who can mount the fastest into the film. Its sickening."
- "Well, times change. Back where I was from, we had a problem very similar to this."
- >"The decline of cinema?"
- "Yeah, and the glorification of stupidity, vice, and sex. Nobody wants to just take it slow, and let movies be movies anymore. It pissed me off a lot too."
- >"Hmm, its sad."
- "You know whats really sad, its the people who perpetuate this shit. If they didn't keep watching it, then the media wouldn't keep making it."
- >"But then, they don't know anything else. Perhaps its up to us to educate them on what real entertainment is."
- "Hey, thats a good idea. We can hold a film festival."
- >"Yeah, and show only the classics."
- "Yup."
- >The two of you get quiet and keep looking at the movie play.
- >Celestia curls up, as her lips quiver, "Nop0ny has touched me like that in 1000 years."
- >Today was a TMI day
- >Be Anon in an apple obsesses Equestrian, but thats not important right now. What is important is when she goes to talk to all her gal pals.
- >So today, be Applejack at Twilight's place. With Spike over at Anon's, the 6 of you pass around chips, soda, and food.
- >Rarity braids Rainbow's mane as she looks over at you, "So, do tell dear, how is the mating with Anonymous?"
- "Well, thing is, hughmans er ready year-round, so ah've been walking funny fer a few months now, but ahm gettin used tah his stamina, sept when he uses his arms."
- >Twilight pulls out a notepad, "Since you brought it up, I've been meaning to ask how he uses a non-reproductive organ in a sexual fashion. It just seems sooo, unorthodox. "
- "Nah, he aint like one of them religious ponies with tha funny hats, he just lubes it up right nice, and jus lets me have it. Tha harder, tha better."
- >All the girls agree and nod as Fluttershy rubs her back legs together, all this talk of Anon's hot monkey dick was getting her warmed up.
- >Much later, there is a knock at Applejack's door, when she goes to answer it, she sees Fluttershy holding an ice-pack over the left side of her face.
- "Fluttershy! What happened tah ya!?"
- >"Umm, well, all that talk about monkey dick got me curious, so, uhh, I tried "going down" on Mr. Brown Monkey from the forest, and well, he didnt do what you said Anon did. In fact, all he did was holler, and freak out."
- "Oh gosh, er you all right?"
- >"Not as bad as anything Angel has ever done, but he did really let me have it with his arm. All though, I didnt enjoy it as much as you, hitting isnt my fetish." She lets down the icepack, and shows off her purple shiner. Applejack winces at the sight, and leads her in.
- "C'mon, lets get some meat on that."
- >Today was a Flutters cant into fetishes right kinda day
- >At Fluttershy's house, music begins to play as animals of all kinds gather for the pet obtaining ritual.
- >You, Rainbow, and Fluttershy come walking up as the huddle around you.
- >Fluttershy flies up, and begins to sing, "Now, Anon my dear, I cannot express my delight
- It's abundantly clear that somewhere out here
- Is the pet that will suit you just right!"
- "Nah, nah, I aint doin that gay singing shit, just get me a pet."
- >An audible scratch in the music brings it to a sudden halt, Fluttershy flaps down, and lands by you, "Oh, umm, what kind of pet did you want?"
- "Something cool, and like, awesome."
- >Rainbow's ears perk up as you walk past her, and to a dog.
- "Yeah, I'm feeling it from this one, I'm gonna name youuu, Killer."
- >Suddenly the dog runs off, and mounts Winnona, it literally vibrates her . Applejack gasps, "Winnona! Bad monster dog! Bad!"
- >Fluttershy tilts her head, "Thats so strange, we had him fixed."
- "Huh, well, cant have that. Ok, so what do you got in the fast department?"
- >Rainbow's ears perk up again, "Fast?"
- "Yeah, I like to run, and need a pet that can keep up. Do you have another dog? One that isnt retaded?"
- >Flutteshy mulls this over, "Umm, no. But I do have this jackrabbit."
- >She reaches into a bush, and pulls out a large rabbit, it sniffs you a moment before biting you on the nose.
- >Fluttershy pulls its away, "Bad bunny! Sorry, he's a biter."
- "Euthanize him. Do you have anything that isnt gay?"
- >"Anon, I'm gonna need you to be more specific, what exactly are you looking for in a pet?"
- *sigh* "I want a smart, cool, independent pet that I wont have to be taking care of all the time, and doesnt need to eat everyday. I forget to feed a lot."
- >Rainbow grins, "Hey, how about me?"
- "What?"
- >"I can do all those things, and I can feed myself if you forget. Ponies are animals in your world right?"
- "Hey thats right! Rainbow you'd make the perfect pet! Except for one thing."
- >"What?"
- "I said no gay pets."
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