MG PSA - Jinkos

Hello, I am Mr. Nemo. Today we are going to discuss Jinkos, the tigers of the MG world. Typically known to be strong, proud disciplined fighters Jinkos have well integrated into city life in careers of Phys Ed., military and professional sports. As such our feline friends are well respected members of the community and should be treated as such.

However, like felines they too undergo periods of “heat”. Symptoms include tactless calls of intercourse, grinding on various surfaces, and an increase in pheromone production.  These pheromones to men act as an aphrodisiac and can linger for hours at a time. The periods of carnal lust for Jinkos can persist for weeks, even months at a time until she is completely satiated.

In order to survive this period of muffing and sweet scents it is best advised to stay indoors. Jinkos while in heat are still capable of rational thought and will respect your decisions. In the unlikely event where she ignores your pleas of mercy call the emergency hotline, and stay in the nearest secure location. If you require going outside, have an Oni or a Mantis to escort you to your desired place of being.

Thank you for listening; I am Mr. Nemo and good day to you all.

Mr.Nemo?

What?

You forgot about the people who can't do that.

What do you mean?

The people who have to commute alone.

Oh... Well, thank you Sally.

It appears I made a little mistake.

This is the most crucial part of this broadcast. If you are a single male DO NOT CHANGE THE CHANNEL. I repeat. DO NOT CHANGE OR TURN OFF THE TELEVISION.

In this situation where you are alone, with no one to call for help, and the Jinko is smacking her lips and waves her tail, do not run. They love the thrill of the hunt. Instead, be sure to calmly walk towards her, nice and easy. Any sudden movements will trigger her instincts to pounce and mount you, unless that's what you want. But why would you watch this? Back to the point when approaching her keep your wide open, as a way of saying "I mean no harm". While walking be sure to clearly state your intentions in a stern, unchanging tone. This will help assert dominance which the Jinko would respond with submissiveness. All Jinko have an innate desire to be dominated, when in heat this desire is quite magnified. Keeping a steady eye on your would be pursuer is also needed to reinforce dominance.

Once you are within her reach, headpats. Give headpats, scratch her ears, kiss her neck, rub her waist and belly and stroke her tail. These areas are the most sensitive for a Jinko in heat, stimulating these areas will be pleasing for her while also keeping her occupied. Continue these actions for about 10 to 15 minutes, more if she still demands however meekly to control you. If you consider yourself proficient at pillow talk, whisper sweet nothings in her ears. Oral stimulation is one that they are most particular to.

Once you are certain that she has lost the energy to attack, call the paramedics. Until then, comfort her. In her current state she is not unlike a drunk and should be treated as such. Ignore her pleas once the paramedics arrive, and head on home. Since your actions had you covered in a Jinko's scent, it would be as if you were claimed, keeping other Jinkos from approaching you. Once you are home proceed to scrub vigorously, any trace of the Jinko's scent would allow her to find you again.

This is Mr. Nemo, I apologize for my oversight, and have a safe day.

Mr. Nemo?

What is it Sally?

What if she brought friends?

In that case you're screwed. We're not still rolling, right?