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ALL SONG PARODY LYRICS

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Nov 6th, 2010
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  1. *A WHOLE NEW WORLD*
  2. sung by Teleharmonic (Tavros) and Fawn (Vriska)
  3. tiny little edits by Teleharmonic and Fawn
  4.  
  5. TAVROS
  6. uHHH, I can show you the world
  7. uHHH, Shining, shimmering, splendid
  8. Tell me, Vriska, now when did
  9. You last, uHHHH, let your heart decide?
  10.  
  11. I can open your eyes
  12. Take you wonder by wonder
  13. Over, sideways and under
  14. On a magic ROCKETCAR ride
  15.  
  16. A whole new world
  17. A new fantastic point of view
  18. No one to tell us no
  19. Or where to go
  20. I ... guess on Prospit, we're dreaming
  21.  
  22. VRISKA
  23. A whole new world
  24. A dazzling place I never knew
  25. But when I'm way up here
  26. It's crystal clear
  27. That now I'm in a whole new world with you
  28.  
  29. TAVROS
  30. Now I'm in a whole new world with you
  31.  
  32. VRISKA
  33. Unbelievable sights
  34. Hey, are these redrom feelings?
  35. Soaring, tumbling, freewheeling
  36. Through an endless map-filled sky
  37. A whole new world
  38.  
  39. TAVROS
  40. Don't you dare close your eyes
  41.  
  42. VRISKA
  43. A hundred thousand things to see
  44.  
  45. TAVROS
  46. Hold your breath - uHHH, it gets better
  47.  
  48. VRISKA
  49. I'm like a shooting star
  50. I've come so far
  51. I can't go back to who I used to be
  52.  
  53. TAVROS
  54. A whole new world
  55.  
  56. VRISKA
  57. Every turn a surprise
  58.  
  59. TAVROS
  60. With new horizons to pursue
  61.  
  62. VRISKA
  63. Every moment red-letter
  64.  
  65. TAVROS + VRISKA
  66. I'll chase them anywhere
  67. There's time to spare
  68. Let me share this whole new world with you
  69.  
  70. TAVROS
  71. A whole new world
  72.  
  73. VRISKA
  74. A whole new world
  75.  
  76. TAVROS
  77. That's where we'll be
  78.  
  79. VRISKA
  80. That's where we'll be
  81.  
  82. TAVROS
  83. A thrilling chase
  84.  
  85. VRISKA
  86. We reached first base
  87.  
  88. TAVROS + VRISKA
  89. For you and me
  90.  
  91. TAVROS: Uhhhh, I've always wanted to fly....
  92. VRISKA: I know. Read your mind.
  93. TAVROS: Uhhhh.... Cool!
  94.  
  95.  
  96.  
  97. *STILL ALIVE*
  98. by Fawn (Vriska) and Teleharmonic (Tavros)
  99. written by Teleharmonic, Fawn, and I know a few other people helped but for the life of me I can't remember who
  100.  
  101. VRISKA
  102. This was a triumph
  103. I'm making a note: Bluh bluh, huge bitch
  104. It's hard to overstate my satisfaction
  105. Here in Alternia
  106. We kill who we want because we can
  107. For the good of my lusus
  108. Except right now she is dead
  109.  
  110. But there's no sense crying 'cause I cannot shed tears
  111. I'll just keep on praying on poor Tavros' fears
  112. And Troll Romance transpires
  113. Among many moon spires
  114. For the twelve trolls who are still alive
  115.  
  116. TAVROS
  117. Uhhh, I'm not even angry
  118. Uhhh, I'm being so sincere right now
  119. Even though you broke my spine and tried to kill me!
  120. And built all these stairways
  121. You covered my hive in all these stairs
  122. You said it was to make me strong
  123. And now my lusus is dead
  124.  
  125. But this code you sent me has allowed me to fly
  126. And I'm just so happy I could break down and cry
  127. I'm just like Pupa Pan flying off to other lands
  128. Like the twelve trolls who are still alive
  129.  
  130. VRISKA
  131. I'm glad you could meet me
  132. I set up this damn charade for you
  133. Maybe you'll find someone else to hate you
  134. Maybe Kanaya
  135. That was a joke, haha, fat chance
  136. Anyway this dust is great
  137. It's just so sparkly and nice
  138.  
  139. TAVROS + VRISKA
  140. Look at us still talking when there's questing to do
  141.  
  142. VRISKA
  143. Have some happy thoughts
  144.  
  145. TAVROS
  146. Whoa is this really you?
  147.  
  148. VRISKA
  149. We've troll romance to explore
  150.  
  151. TAVROS
  152. Vriska, help me off the floor!
  153.  
  154. TAVROS + VRISKA
  155. With the twelve trolls who are still alive
  156.  
  157. VRISKA
  158. At least I'm guessing that they're still alive
  159.  
  160. TAVROS
  161. I'm flying rockets and we're still alive
  162.  
  163. VRISKA
  164. I'm so fantastic and we're still alive
  165.  
  166. TAVROS
  167. If Vriska loves me am I still alive?
  168.  
  169. VRISKA
  170. Not for long you won't be still alive
  171.  
  172. TAVROS
  173. Still alive
  174.  
  175. TAVROS + VRISKA
  176. Still alive
  177.  
  178.  
  179.  
  180. *COLORS OF THE WIND*
  181. by Fawn (Terezi)
  182. written by Fawn and a few other people.... It's in the thread somewhere. I can't remember :C
  183.  
  184. TEREZI
  185. You think that I'm just some weird alien
  186. But you don't know much about us, so guess what?
  187. Fuck off, you're wrong!
  188. But still I cannot see.
  189. That's right, I'm blind, I can't see.
  190. How can there be so much that you don't know?
  191. You don't know....
  192.  
  193. You think sense whatever land you land in
  194. The world is just a dead thing you can see
  195. I've tasted every rock and tree and creature
  196. They taste red, they taste yellow, they taste green
  197.  
  198. You think the only people that you can trust
  199. Are the people in the same session as you
  200. But if you walk the footsteps of a blind troll
  201. You'll taste things you never smelt, you never knew
  202.  
  203. Have you ever heard the whales cry to the colored moons?
  204. Or asked a musclebeast why he's so STRONG?
  205. Can you type with all the numerals of the prophets?
  206. Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?
  207. Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?
  208.  
  209. Come down the hidden pine trails in the forest
  210. Come taste his Honorable Tyranny
  211. Come swing from the ropes underneath my tree hive
  212. And make sure that the guilty don't go free
  213.  
  214. The asshole and the huge bitch hate each other
  215. My unborn dragon lusus is my friend
  216. And we are all connected to each other
  217. In a double Möbius loop that never ends
  218.  
  219. How high can my giant tree grow?
  220. If you cut it down, then you'll never know.
  221.  
  222. And you'll never hear the whales cry to the colored moons,
  223. For whether you are human or grey-skinned,
  224. You need to type with all the numerals of the prophets
  225. You need to paint with all the colors of the wind
  226.  
  227. You can see the world and still
  228. You won't know your world until
  229. You can paint with all the colors of the wind
  230.  
  231.  
  232.  
  233. *BLACK ROMANCE*
  234. by Fawn (Vriska)
  235. written by Mirakelsey and Fawn
  236.  
  237. VRISKA
  238. Ohhhh, caught in a Black Romance x2
  239.  
  240. Bluh bluh bluh bluh bluh
  241. Bluh bluh bluh bluh bluh
  242. Huge bitch bluh bluh bluh
  243. Want your Black Romance
  244. x2
  245.  
  246. I want your stutter
  247. I want your bad legs
  248. I want your fantasy
  249. I want you to beg
  250. I want your hate
  251. Hate hate hate
  252. I want your hate
  253.  
  254. I want your treasure
  255. Boondollars in hand
  256. Get in your rocket car
  257. Or roll through the sand
  258. I want your hate
  259. Hate hate hate
  260. I want your hate (hate hate hate I want your hate)
  261.  
  262. You know that I hate you
  263. And yet somehow I need you
  264. I want a black
  265. A Black Romance
  266.  
  267. I want your hating and I want your revenge
  268. You and me could have a Black Romance (Ohhhhhhh)
  269. I want your hate and your kismesis revenge
  270. You and me could have a Black Romance
  271.  
  272. Ohhhhhh, caught in a Black Romance x2
  273.  
  274. Bluh bluh bluh bluh bluh
  275. Bluh bluh bluh bluh bluh
  276. Huge bitch bluh bluh bluh
  277. Want your Black Romance
  278.  
  279. You think you're Pupa
  280. But Rufio's fake
  281. Fly through the map-filled sky
  282. There's treasure to take
  283. I want your hate
  284. Hate hate hate
  285. I want your hate
  286.  
  287. Now you're in my room
  288. I know my web sticks
  289. I'll be your TinkerVriska
  290. Baby it's sick
  291. I want your hate
  292. Hate hate hate
  293. I want your hate (hate hate hate I want your hate)
  294.  
  295. You know that I hate you
  296. And yet somehow I need you ('Cause I'm a huge bitch, baby!)
  297. I want a black
  298. A Black Romance
  299.  
  300. I want your hating and I want your revenge
  301. You and me could have a Black Romance (Ohhhhhhh)
  302. I want your hate and your kismesis revenge
  303. You and me could have a Black Romance
  304.  
  305. Ohhhhhh, caught in a Black Romance x2
  306.  
  307. Bluh bluh bluh bluh bluh
  308. Bluh bluh bluh bluh bluh
  309. Huge bitch bluh bluh bluh
  310. Want your Black Romance
  311. x2
  312.  
  313. Climb, climb, Tavros baby
  314. Get strong stupid, I'm not crazy
  315. x3
  316. Climb, climb, stupid baby
  317. Get strong, I'm a huge bitch, baby!
  318.  
  319. I want your hate and I want your revenge
  320. I want your hate, I want to be hate-friends
  321. Je te déteste, mais je veux que tu m'aimes [Trans: I hate you, but I want you to love me]
  322. Je te déteste [Trans: I hate you]
  323.  
  324. I don't want to be pale (Ohhhhhh)
  325. Don't wanna be ashen (Caught in a Black Romance)
  326. I don't wanna be flushed (Ohhhhhhh)
  327. Want your Black Romance
  328. (Caught in a Black Romance)
  329. Want your Black Romance!
  330.  
  331. I want your hating and I want your revenge
  332. You and me could have a Black Romance (Ohhhhhhh)
  333. I want your hate and your kismesis revenge
  334. You and me could have a Black Romance
  335.  
  336. Ohhhhhh, caught in a Black Romance x2
  337.  
  338. Bluh bluh bluh bluh bluh
  339. Bluh bluh bluh bluh bluh
  340. Huge bitch bluh bluh bluh
  341. Want your Black Romance
  342.  
  343.  
  344.  
  345. *GO THE DISTANCE*
  346. by Teleharmonic (Tavros) with Fawn (Vriska)
  347. written by Teleharmonic, with dialogue by Fawn and TH
  348.  
  349. TAVROS
  350. I have often dreamed
  351. Of a place like this
  352. With a new adventure
  353. And a sky wide and free
  354. With a thousand quests
  355. And a single kiss
  356. And the maps are showing
  357. This is where I'm meant to be
  358.  
  359. And I'm on my way
  360. Flying 'cross the distance
  361. In my rocketcar
  362. I guess I could be strong
  363. I'll do every quest
  364. Hey, I'll be the best!
  365. I would go most anywhere
  366. to find where I belong
  367.  
  368. VRISKA: Oh my god Tavros. What are you doing?
  369. TAVROS: Uhhh.... Singing?
  370. VRISKA: ...why?
  371. TAVROS: I was just, uh, feeling it, I guess. It seemed appropriate! About to go on a quest and all—
  372. VRISKA: So you decided to waste our time by SINGING?
  373. TAVROS: I was just trying to ... uh, set the mood?
  374. VRISKA: ...SET the MOOD? Tavros, this is what I was trying to TELL you about being a good FLARPer. A good FLARPer doesn't break into song in the middle of a quest!
  375. TAVROS: ...okay just ... one more chorus?
  376. VRISKA: NO! This is a waste of time and you're not doing it.
  377. TAVROS: Ah, how about I say something nice about you when I do the next chorus?
  378. VRISKA: (sputtering) Just ... hurry up.
  379. TAVROS: Okay, uhh.... Oooh, okay, hang on! You might like this.... I hope.
  380.  
  381. TAVROS:
  382. And we'll find our way
  383. We can go the distance
  384. And I know someday
  385. You can make me strong
  386. And if I'm surprised
  387. At what's in your eyes
  388. I guess after all this might be
  389. Right where I belong
  390.  
  391. TAVROS: You know, I hope you didn't think I, uhhhh ... didn't appreciate the Pupa Pan thing.... I liked it!
  392. VRISKA: Yeah ... whatever.
  393.  
  394.  
  395. *TROLLIAN*
  396. by cynicalCanasian (TEREZI) and Fawn (VRISKA)
  397. written by cynicalCanasian and Fawn
  398.  
  399. TEREZI
  400. Hello hello Karkat, you trolled
  401. I can't read a thing
  402. I am busy FLARPing
  403. With AG right now, see
  404. Karkat would you stop whining
  405. About your movies, please?
  406. Like I said, I can't answer
  407. I'm kind of busy
  408. K-kind of busy
  409. K-k-kind of busy
  410. Sorry, I cannot answer
  411. I'm kind of busy
  412.  
  413. Just a second Team Charge
  414. Is attacking us tonight
  415. Aradia's my clouder
  416. And she'll put up quite a fight
  417. You should have Trolled me earlier
  418. You knew when I was free
  419. And now you won't stop Trolling me
  420. I'm kind of busy
  421.  
  422. Stop Trolling, stop Trolling
  423. I don't wanna think anymore
  424. I'm dealing justice to Trolls on the FLARP board
  425. Stop Trolling, stop Trolling
  426. I don't wanna talk anymore
  427. I'm dealing justice to Trolls on the FLARP board
  428.  
  429. H3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3
  430. (Stop trying to chat with me)
  431. H3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3
  432. (I'm busy)
  433. H3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3
  434. H3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3
  435. (Stop trying to chat with me)
  436. H3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3
  437.  
  438. You can Troll if you want
  439. But I won't answer
  440. I am too busy for Trollian
  441. 'Cause I'm out on a roll
  442. And I'm killin' the Trolls
  443. I am too busy for Trollian
  444. You can Troll if you want
  445. But I won't answer
  446. I am too busy for Trollian
  447. 'Cause I'm out on a roll
  448. And I'm killin' the Trolls
  449. I am too busy for Trollian
  450.  
  451. VRISKA
  452. Boy you have to advance or abscond
  453. So make your choice much faster
  454. Just roll your dice faster
  455. Or I won't leave no faster
  456. Maybe I should have stayed at home
  457. This session's a disaster
  458. I'mma make your choice for you
  459. Adios, Toreadumbass!
  460.  
  461. TEREZI
  462. It's not that I don't like you
  463. I'm just busy FLARPing
  464. And I am sick and tired
  465. Of my glasses flashing
  466.  
  467. VRISKA
  468. So maybe I fucked up
  469. By forcing you off a cliff
  470. Tonight I won't worry 'bout that
  471. 'Cause I'll be FLARPing
  472. 'Cause I'll be FLARPing
  473. 'Cause I'll be FLARPing
  474. Tonight I won't worry 'bout that
  475. 'Cause I'll be FLARPing
  476.  
  477. TEREZI + VRISKA
  478. Stop Trolling, stop Trolling
  479. I don't wanna think anymore
  480.  
  481. TEREZI
  482. I'm dealing justice to Trolls on the FLARP board
  483.  
  484. TEREZI + VRISKA
  485. Stop Trolling, stop Trolling
  486. I don't wanna talk anymore
  487.  
  488. VRISKA
  489. I'm too busy killing Trolls on the FLARP board
  490.  
  491. TEREZI + VRISKA
  492. Stop Trolling, stop Trolling
  493. I don't wanna think anymore
  494.  
  495. TEREZI
  496. I'm dealing justice to Trolls on the FLARP board
  497.  
  498. TEREZI + VRISKA
  499. Stop Trolling, stop Trolling
  500. I don't wanna talk anymore
  501.  
  502. VRISKA
  503. I'm too busy killing Trolls on the FLARP board
  504.  
  505. TEREZI + (VRISKA)
  506. H3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 (8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh)
  507.  
  508. TEREZI
  509. Stop trying to chat with me
  510.  
  511. TEREZI + (VRISKA)
  512. H3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 (8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh)
  513.  
  514. TEREZI
  515. I'm busy
  516.  
  517. TEREZI + (VRISKA)
  518. H3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 (8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh)
  519.  
  520. VRISKA
  521. Stop trying to guilt me
  522.  
  523. TEREZI + (VRISKA)
  524. H3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 h3 (8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh 8luh)
  525.  
  526. You can Troll if you want
  527. But I won't answer
  528. I am too busy for Trollian
  529. 'Cause I'm out on a roll
  530. And I'm killin' the Trolls
  531. I am too busy for Trollian
  532. You can Troll if you want
  533. But I won't answer
  534. I am too busy for Trollian
  535. 'Cause I'm out on a roll
  536. And I'm killin' the Trolls
  537. I am too busy for Trollian
  538.  
  539. My Trollian
  540. My-my-my Trollian
  541. 'Cause I'm out on a roll
  542. And I'm killin' the Trolls
  543. I am too busy for Trollian
  544. My Trollian
  545. My-my-my Trollian
  546. 'Cause I'm out on a roll
  547. And I'm killin' the Trolls
  548. I am too busy for Trollian
  549.  
  550. VRISKA: Fly, Pupa! Fly!!!
  551.  
  552.  
  553.  
  554. *MAKE A MAN OUT OF YOU*
  555. by Fawn (Vriska) and Teleharmonic (Tavros)
  556. written by Eniteris, with edits by Fawn
  557.  
  558. VRISKA
  559. Let's get down to business
  560. To rescue Skaia
  561. Why's my client Tavros
  562. And server Kanaya?
  563. You're the saddest troll
  564. I ever met
  565. But you can bet
  566. Before I'm through
  567. Tavros, I'll make a man
  568. out of you
  569.  
  570. Cruel as the spider
  571. That's where you'll begin
  572. Once you find your power
  573. Tear imps limb from limb
  574. You're a legless, pale
  575. Pathetic grub
  576. And you haven't got a clue
  577. Somehow I'll make a man
  578. Out of you
  579.  
  580. TAVROS
  581. I'm never gonna climb these stairs!
  582. I never was a real good FLARPer.
  583. It isn't my fault that I can't use two limbs!
  584. Vriska, stop shaking my chair!
  585.  
  586. VRISKA
  587. Kanaya put down the load-gaper!
  588. Now I really will actually help him!
  589.  
  590. TAVROS
  591. Be a man
  592.  
  593. VRISKA
  594. You must be swift as the cavalreapers
  595.  
  596. TAVROS
  597. Be a man
  598.  
  599. VRISKA
  600. With all the force of a great sky whale
  601.  
  602. TAVROS
  603. Be a man
  604.  
  605. VRISKA
  606. With all the strength of the ruffiannihilators
  607. Mysterious as the dark side of the veil
  608.  
  609. Time is racing toward us
  610. 'Til the meteors impact
  611. Heed my every order
  612. and you'll stay on track
  613. You're unsuited for
  614. this game of Sgrub
  615. So here is the code:
  616. PSHOOOES
  617. How can I make a man out of you?
  618.  
  619. TAVROS
  620. Be a man
  621.  
  622. TAVROS + VRISKA
  623. You must be swift as the cavalreapers
  624.  
  625. TAVROS
  626. Be a man
  627.  
  628. TAVROS + VRISKA
  629. With all the force of a great sky whale
  630.  
  631. TAVROS
  632. Be a man
  633.  
  634. TAVROS + VRISKA
  635. With all the strength of the ruffiannihilators
  636.  
  637. VRISKA
  638. Mysterious as the dark side of the veil
  639.  
  640. TAVROS
  641. Pupa Pan
  642.  
  643. VRISKA
  644. You must be swift as the young boy-skylark
  645.  
  646. TAVROS
  647. Pupa Pan
  648.  
  649. VRISKA
  650. With all the force of a pirate's gun
  651.  
  652. TAVROS
  653. Pupa Pan
  654.  
  655. VRISKA
  656. With all the treasure beneath the X mark
  657. Come on Tavros, our adventure's just begun!
  658.  
  659.  
  660.  
  661. *OOGIE BOOGIE VRISKA*
  662. by Fawn (Vriska) with Teleharmonic (Tavros)
  663. written by Fawn and Zigkirby
  664.  
  665. VRISKA
  666. Well well well
  667. What have we here?
  668. Pupa Pan, huh?
  669. Oh, how exciting!
  670. So you finally showed up to face your Denizen...
  671. Ha ha ha ha!
  672. You're joking, you're joking,
  673. I can't believe my eye!
  674. I can't believe you fell for that!
  675. This must be the right guy
  676. He's flighty--he's handsome
  677. I don't know which is worse
  678. I'd go and get my pail now
  679. But I might die laughing first!
  680.  
  681. Welcome to my spider's lair
  682. In the heart of my land
  683. You'd better pay attention now
  684. 'Cause it's Pupa's Last Stand
  685. Have you misplaced your shadow?
  686. You'll find it, so don't quit!
  687. It's been under you this whole time,
  688. You stupid sack of shit!
  689. Whooaaaa
  690.  
  691. IMPS
  692. Whoaaa
  693.  
  694. VRISKA
  695. Whoaaa
  696.  
  697. IMPS
  698. Whoaaa
  699.  
  700. VRISKA
  701. Whoaaa
  702.  
  703. IMPS
  704. Whoaaa
  705.  
  706. VRISKA + IMPS
  707. 'Cause I'm Vriska Serket, Pan
  708.  
  709. VRISKA
  710. Well I'm feeling antsy
  711. And there's everything to do
  712. I may just puff a special batch
  713. Of stardust just for you
  714. And I'll tell you what it does
  715. I'll explain it real concise
  716. If you want to fly, you'll kiss me now!
  717. Ain't I just so nice
  718.  
  719. IMPS
  720. Whoaaa
  721.  
  722. VRISKA
  723. Whoaaa
  724.  
  725. IMPS
  726. Whoaaa
  727.  
  728. VRISKA
  729. Whoaaaaa
  730.  
  731. IMPS
  732. Whoaaa
  733.  
  734. VRISKA
  735. Yeah...
  736.  
  737. VRISKA + IMPS
  738. 'Cause I'm Vriska Serket, Pan
  739.  
  740. TAVROS
  741. Release me please, or you will face
  742. The wrath of RUFIO!
  743. I mean, like, if he were real
  744. He'd save me from you, Weirdo
  745.  
  746. VRISKA
  747. WHAT?!
  748. You're joking! You're joking!
  749. I don't believe this shit!
  750. I go through all this elaborate work
  751. For a dumb response like this?!
  752. You're cruel! You're evil!
  753. You're really a deadweight!
  754. And now, WITHOUT your permission
  755. I'm going to manipulate.
  756.  
  757. TAVROS: Uhhh, What are you going to do--whoaaaaaa!
  758. VRISKA: I'm going to give you some happy thoughts! Ahahahaha! Oooooh! Dance around a bit, Tavros! Now jump up in the air! Now do it again. Oh, ha!
  759. TAVROS: Vriska, what are you doing?
  760. VRISKA: Something I've always wanted to do.
  761.  
  762. Hearing your panicked voice to me
  763. Is music in the air
  764. 'Cause I'm a selfish lady, Pan,
  765. You know I don't play fair!
  766. It's much more fun, I must confess
  767. When SANITY is on the line
  768. Not mine, of course
  769. But yours, Tavros?
  770. Now that'd be just fine.
  771.  
  772. TAVROS
  773. Please stop this now or I can call
  774. The others here to make you stop
  775.  
  776. VRISKA
  777. Oh Pupa, you're something
  778. You're tangled in my web
  779. I don't think that you understand
  780. You stupid dunderhead!
  781. Don't struggle, you'll have fun
  782. There's no need to despair
  783. 'Cause I'm Vriska Serket, baby
  784. And you ain't goin' nowhere....
  785.  
  786.  
  787.  
  788. *TAKE ME OR LEAVE ME*
  789. by Fawn (Vriska) and Red Pen (Terezi)
  790. written by Zigkirby, Red Pen, and Fawn
  791.  
  792. VRISKA
  793. Every single game
  794. I walk through the gate.
  795. I hear people say: "Serket so great"
  796. Ever since sweep 3
  797. Everybody stares at me
  798. Boys, girls, I can't help it baby
  799. So be kind, and don't lose your mind
  800. Just remember that I'm your ally.
  801.  
  802. Take me for what I am
  803. Who I was meant to be
  804. And if you give a damn
  805. Take me baby,
  806. Or leave me
  807.  
  808. Take me or leave me
  809.  
  810. A spider with no lair
  811. Can never catch her prey
  812. To FLARP you need a pair
  813. Baby, so let's play
  814. You are the one I choose
  815. They'd kill to fill our red shoes
  816. You loved to kill people too, Sister
  817. So let's game, but don't you complain, saying
  818. "If you kill, you can't be my, my, my Sister"
  819.  
  820. Take me for what I am
  821. Who I was meant to be
  822. And if you give a damn
  823. Take me baby or leave me
  824.  
  825. No way, can I be what I'm not
  826. But hey, I'm badass AND I'm hot!
  827. Don't fight, in FLARP I am your twin
  828. Cause every game, who helps you win?
  829. Who?
  830. Who helps you win?
  831. (spoken) Kiss, Pookie
  832.  
  833. TEREZI
  834. It won't work
  835. Made this mistake before
  836. I love justice and penalty
  837. Don't trust you anymore, baby
  838. No not me
  839. Yes, I quit.
  840. you're to blame
  841. I hate you but I love the game.
  842. How to corral my immoral baby?
  843. Sure I'm blind but I don't change my mind
  844. You level-grind but you won't find
  845. Your Scourge Sister, baby.
  846.  
  847. Take me for what I am
  848.  
  849. VRISKA
  850. (A blind tree girl)
  851.  
  852. TEREZI
  853. Who I was meant to be
  854.  
  855. VRISKA
  856. (Full of highfalutin' morals)
  857.  
  858. TEREZI
  859. And if you give a damn
  860.  
  861. VRISKA
  862. (And fancy reservations)
  863.  
  864. TEREZI
  865. Take me baby or leave me
  866.  
  867. VRISKA
  868. (A killer's a killer!)
  869.  
  870. VRISKA + TEREZI
  871. That's it
  872.  
  873. TEREZI
  874. I know you won't play fair
  875.  
  876. VRISKA + TEREZI
  877. I quit
  878.  
  879. TEREZI
  880. So get out of my hair
  881.  
  882. VRISKA + TEREZI
  883. Sister
  884.  
  885. VRISKA
  886. What is it about you?
  887.  
  888. VRISKA + TEREZI
  889. Can't play with you or without you
  890. Take me for what I am
  891.  
  892. TEREZI
  893. Who I was meant to be
  894.  
  895. VRISKA
  896. Who I was meant to be
  897. And if you give a damn
  898.  
  899. TEREZI
  900. And if you give a damn then
  901. Take me baby, or leave me
  902.  
  903. VRISKA
  904. Take me baby, take me or leave me
  905.  
  906. VRISKA + TEREZI
  907. Take me baby or leave me
  908. (spoken) Guess I'm leaving, I'm gone!
  909.  
  910.  
  911.  
  912. *FEED ME, VRISKA (GIT IT)*
  913. by Fawn (Vriska and Spidermom)
  914. written by Derp, with edits and additional dialogue by Fawn
  915.  
  916. SPIDERMOM: Feed me...
  917. VRISKA: ...I beg your pardon?
  918. SPIDERMOM: Feed me.
  919. VRISKA: I can't feed you anymore!! Their spirits come back!
  920. SPIDERMOM: Feed me, Serket, and FEED ME NOW!
  921. VRISKA: I-I can't!
  922. SPIDERMOM: But I'm STARVING!
  923. VRISKA: Look, maybe I can give you some of my blood?
  924. SPIDERMOM: More.... More! MORE!
  925. VRISKA: There isn't any more! What do you want me to do, cut off my arm and feed it to you?
  926. SPIDERMOM: Aaah!
  927. VRISKA: ...look, I've got an idea. I'll go down to Equius' and pick you up a nice chopped musclebeast--
  928. SPIDERMOM: Must be troll...
  929. VRISKA: Mom, I can't--
  930. SPIDERMOM: Must be fresh...
  931. VRISKA: You know that isn't possible!
  932.  
  933. SPIDERMOM
  934. Feed me!
  935.  
  936. VRISKA
  937. Does it have to be Troll?
  938.  
  939. SPIDERMOM
  940. Feed me!
  941.  
  942. VRISKA
  943. Does it have to be live?
  944.  
  945. SPIDERMOM
  946. Feed me!
  947.  
  948. VRISKA
  949. How do I stop them from haunting me?!
  950.  
  951. SPIDERMOM
  952. Feed me, Vriska
  953. Feed me all night long
  954. That's right, Guuurl
  955. You can do it!
  956. Feed me, Vriska
  957. Feed me all night long
  958. Hahaha
  959. 'Cause if you feed me, Vriska
  960. I can raise you big and strooonng
  961.  
  962. VRISKA: No, I can't do it, Mom. I can't do it without them haunting me!
  963. SPIDERMOM: It'll be worth your while.
  964. VRISKA: ...what? How?
  965. SPIDERMOM: You think the praise is all a coincidence? When you kill, you prove that you're the BEST FLARPer!
  966. VRISKA: ...look, I don't have to listen to you. You're JUST a Lusus, and I'm too old to be nannied by you!
  967. SPIDERMOM: So what, you're better than me now? I'll eat no matter what, Vriska. Whether you agree to bring me food or not.
  968. VRISKA: ...you wouldn't....
  969. SPIDERMOM: So by helping me, you're really helping yourself.
  970.  
  971. Would you like s'more red shoes?
  972. Or an auspistice to keep tracka you?
  973. How about bidding your fears adieu?
  974. You gonna git it.
  975. (spoken) If you want it.
  976.  
  977. Would you like to FLARP every day
  978. Just like Mindfang, gettin' to slay
  979. Just give your spider momma some pray
  980. You gonna git it.
  981.  
  982. I'm your Lusus, I'm your friend
  983. I am willing slave.
  984. Take a chance, just feed me and
  985. You know the kinda eats,
  986. The kinda rainbow treats
  987. The kinda sticky licky sweets
  988. I crave!
  989.  
  990. Come on, Vriska, don't be a putz
  991. Your life can be greater than a purple blood's
  992. Show a little 'nitiative, work up the guts
  993. And you'll git it
  994.  
  995. VRISKA
  996. I don't know.... I don't know!
  997. I have so, so many strong reservations
  998. Should I go and perform ... mutilations?
  999. (spoken) ...again.
  1000.  
  1001. SPIDERMOM
  1002. You didn't have nothin' 'til you met me.
  1003. Come on, girl, what will it be?
  1004. Loot?
  1005. Fame?
  1006. Getting all of the levels?
  1007. What about your quadrants?
  1008. Think it over.
  1009. There must be someone you can kill
  1010. To make me some LUNCH!
  1011.  
  1012. Think about a kismesis
  1013. Getting meddled by an auspistice
  1014. You'll fill pails my little miss
  1015. And you'll git it
  1016. Ahh-hah!
  1017.  
  1018. VRISKA
  1019. Gee I'd like some Pchooos,
  1020. Flying around and I do what I choose,
  1021. Make that brown blood cry as I cruise
  1022.  
  1023. SPIDERMOM
  1024. So go git it!
  1025. If you wanna be profound
  1026. And you really gotta justify
  1027. Take a breath and look around
  1028. A lot of folks deserve to die
  1029.  
  1030. VRISKA: WAIT A SECOND WAIT A SECOND. That might be true. But their ghosts won't stop haunting me! I-I can't feed you without Aradia sicking them on me. In case you didn't know, that's really unpleasant!
  1031. SPIDERMOM: Well, sure. If you have a conscience.
  1032. VRISKA: It's not just about conscience! It's.... I can't do anything without her getting in the way!
  1033. SPIDERMOM: But what if you kill her?
  1034. VRISKA: ...no, she's too smart to get fed to you.
  1035. SPIDERMOM: Who said she had to get fed...? With her gone, you can feed me as many Trolls as you'd like....
  1036.  
  1037. VRISKA + SPIDERMOM
  1038. If you want a rationale
  1039. That is what you need right? (yeah yeah yeah)
  1040. Stop and think it over, gal
  1041. That chick will be ashes tonight!
  1042. That chick will be ashes tonight!
  1043. That chick will be ashes tonight!
  1044.  
  1045. VRISKA
  1046. She's so nasty, treating me rough!
  1047.  
  1048. SPIDERMOM
  1049. Summoning ghosts and talking so tough
  1050.  
  1051. VRISKA
  1052. You need blood and we'll get more than enough
  1053.  
  1054. SPIDERMOM
  1055. I need blood and we'll get more than enough
  1056.  
  1057. VRISKA + SPIDERMOM
  1058. We need blood and we'll get more than enough!
  1059.  
  1060. SPIDERMOM
  1061. (spoken) So ... go git her....
  1062.  
  1063.  
  1064.  
  1065. *STARS AND THE MOONS*
  1066. by Fawn (Vriska)
  1067. written by Fawn with assistance from Zigkirby and Kuraiou
  1068.  
  1069. VRISKA
  1070. I met a Troll who was obsessed with Pupa Pan
  1071. Who despite all the odds would always wear a smile.
  1072. I met a Troll who at the face of danger ran
  1073. Who would barely respond at my attempts to rile.
  1074. I tortured him, so when I tried to kiss him
  1075. He got scared and he pushed me away
  1076. So it took him a while just to say:
  1077.  
  1078. “I’ll give you stars and the moons and we'll FLARP together
  1079. And I'll help you get all the loot
  1080. We'll get all of the levels from the trials we weather
  1081. And we'll have lots of fun to boot.
  1082. Even though I know I’m not strong I think you can teach me
  1083. I promise that I won’t, uh, whine.”
  1084. And I said: "Tavros?
  1085. Just grow a fucking spine."
  1086.  
  1087. I met a Troll who was a dweller of the sea
  1088. Who wanted to kill all landdwellers on a whim.
  1089. I met a troll who's more theatrical than me
  1090. Who asked if I would like to FLARP some more with him
  1091. Though I said sure, as time went on I grew bored
  1092. So I quit before things got too bland
  1093. And he whined: "But I don't understand
  1094.  
  1095. I'll givve you stars and the moons and hatred abound
  1096. A bloody rivver beneath our fleet
  1097. And for your lusus I'll get fresh troll meat by the pound
  1098. In a campaign that can't be beat
  1099. I'll be the hottest iron in your fire, so just tell me
  1100. How I can keep you wwith me"
  1101. And I said: "Eridan?
  1102. Go cry to Feferi."
  1103.  
  1104. I met a boy from the universe that we made
  1105. A pretty derpy kid who walked a path of hope
  1106. I met a boy in the Land of Wind and Shade
  1107. It's my job to make him a bit less of a dope
  1108. So I guess I'll just manipulate him
  1109. If I flirt, I'll control what he thinks
  1110. But I guess should click on these links....
  1111.  
  1112. It's a clip of Nick Cage from the movie Con Air
  1113. He's the hottest man I've ever seen
  1114. He's in a blood-stained wifebeater and has greasy hair
  1115. And the sweat gives his skin a sheen
  1116. And he is soulfully standing there holding a bunny
  1117. I think that I may just swoon!
  1118.  
  1119. And I thought: "Oh my"
  1120. Guess found my mate!
  1121. So I made my shrine
  1122. But since Earth was gone
  1123. He'd already died
  1124. I was all alone
  1125. And I couldn't dream
  1126. I sat in the lab
  1127. In this universe
  1128. And I thought: "My God
  1129. I’ll never have the Moons."
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