Welp, it finally happened. Not gonna pretend I’m entirely unaffected by this or anything, or I wouldn’t be writing this last will and banstament, but I’m not gonna say it wasn’t transparent as heck that it’d happen sooner or later, so even I’m surprised at how well I took this, given that BL is a reasonably large part of my life.

I’ve seen a lot of contested opinions on me, whether it was “Oh I don’t think he liked me, so I’m not sure what to think of his ban.” I’d like to say as a start that besides my ignorelist and a handful of other people I’d love to punch in the face (you probably know who you are, but in case you don’t, Asunder, Tobias, Renko, etc.), I liked more or less everyone, or at least felt they were parts of the environment I liked. I thought BL formed a nice “whole” of people ranging from those I consider close friends who I’ve even gone drinking with, to people who were nice to have around because I felt they respected me. I guess that’s sort of egotistical of me thinking that way but heck off.

The exception to any of the above would be the 2015 babby army that’s unfortunately part of making BL so unnecessarily babying. I think the people worth being on BL were all reasonably grown-up and didn’t mind a bit of flame or banter, but with the crackdown on enforcement of rules over the last 11 months or so it’s starting to cater a bit too much to the kind of people I was hoping to escape by coming to BL.

Anyway, that’s not important, environments change and I know that, I’d just love if that was a positive sort of development but that’s life.

As for my final straw, the Break thing, I’m happy to see that all the people that matter I’ve seen comment on it saw it as a service. It was good going down 1-1 instead of 0-1 like Magos. I removed someone who was genuinely unwanted and easily one of the worst members in the site’s history, and even if that was only a week earlier than usual I like to think I went down a hero. The whole “skype conspiracy ban thing” being the reason is pretty funny though, given that while we talked about it in the sort of normal jokey fashion that goes on on Skype, neither me nor Strife actually needed to do anything in particular and I don’t think we did? Like yes, I reported Break’s posts more than usual, if that was gonna result in a ban as well that’s that, I’d just like to point out that Operation “Talk About Nero To Draw Out The Guy Who Autistically Talks About Her And Doesn’t Know Of Spoiler Tags” was more or less a concept.

I’m not gonna contest my ban even with that, it was gonna happen sooner or later with how much the admins, particularly Tobias (seriously? Ageism? Fucking get over yourself) have been on my dick for the longest time. I’ll probably get banned in no time anyway for a snide comment or something if I came back. That’s just the problem of me being too honest; I won’t deny in the slightest that I’m far too honest with my annoyance and I dislike censoring myself. Sort of bad when you’re on a forum where “fuck off” or “nigga” are worthy of a warning or even a strike. I still can’t help but laugh at getting a week long ban back in February ‘14 because I had a sig with Ryougi smoking weed with a black rapper on a poster in the background. Apparently this counted as “continued racism”. That was about the time Altima became a joke and remained so forever in my mind. Point being I’ve always been attracting the banhammer apparently. Good times.

Basically the “double-digit offense list” is sort of less funny when you consider how hilariously awful the justification was for some of them. But I digress I’m just bitching again. I respect the current active mods, and those only, among the staff. I think they’re great, and I respect them all. I just hope they do something about BL’s otherwise awful staff. To said awful staff;

Hymn, get off the staff, you have no investment in BL at this point if you don’t “have the time” to be a user, and therefor your judgement of things is worth less than nothing.

Elf, you’ve got an unending amount of bias, you’re active once a week, and your novel is still awful. Get off the staff like RB.

Altima, you’re a joke. Get off the staff.

Tobias, despite your status as the only active admin you’re probably the worst of the bunch. I’d go into more detail but I’d inevitably end up flaming you so hard that this post wouldn’t pass inspection because I genuinely despise you that much. Five deserved the promotion to adminhood about a billion times more than you.

DP, get off your ass or hand over the keys to someone more qualified. mAc can do everything you do and probably more or less as good.

And that’s it for my ranty callout. I’ll stop now to not leave things on a sour note. That is, that my influence probably won’t leave BL entirely. I’m one of the founding fathers of the skype group and I’ll continue to be there and talk with people, since the better part of my online friends are on BL. I also pop on notes once in a blue moon, and I’m on twitter @Christemo where I’ll keep bothering the mods with my very important opinions. Besides that I dusted off my Escapist account which I remember shittily posting on as a 13 year old back in ‘09, but I can’t say I think anyone on BL cares about that place.

And that’s all. I just wanted to vent all my feelings to get some closure. If Strife ever buys the servers and starts 3.0 I’ll be back, otherwise I’ll probably just hang around like a ghost since I’m bad at letting go. BL and the people I met on it helped me immensely with a bad case of depression back in early ‘14 and I won't ever forget about that, and it has help. As for what I’ll do next, hopefully I’ll stop autistically following threads in class and actually focus before I fail anything.

I’ll see all of you that I don’t talk to often on the flipside, presuming I get someone to even post this awful, uncensored rant.

With possibly love depending on who you are? With love is more likely than not probably, so just assume this is with love unless you know I don’t like you.

-Christemo

oh and PS: Ivan, I’m very happy you used such charming words as “Symbol” or “Martyr” about me, it makes me happy that you consider me with such acknowledging words, but please don’t think we’re alike. If nothing else I didn’t beat my little brother half to death with a firepoker over literally nothing like you did. I’ll be patiently waiting for your /k/ommando mail bomb you epic memeroonie Internet Le Badass, since you have my address and all that. Be sure to hurry up and do it before I move! :D