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Hamnonymous

Fetish-Shy: Random shorts

Jun 12th, 2012
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  1. >Day nobody cares
  2. >Knock on the door
  3. >GEE I WONDER WHO THAT COULD BE?
  4. >Fucking Fluttershy again
  5. "What do you want this time Flutters?"
  6. >"Oh well I... um was looking through your dvd collection and I think I finally figured out your fetish."
  7. "Oh god let's get this over with, what is it?"
  8. >"Okay... but first a joke"
  9. >"What do you get when you cross an owl with a bungee cord?"
  10. >"Your fetish. Nyaa ha ha ha ha"
  11. "Fluttershy, Kung Pow: Enter the Fist is not my fetish."
  12. >"I-I implore you to reconsider... if that's okay with you."
  13. Fucking chosen one
  14.  
  15. ------
  16.  
  17. >Day 405 in Equestria
  18. >Hear a knock at the door
  19. >It's Fluttershy, but something's... odd
  20. >She now has a crab's body and is wearing a pair of sunglasses
  21. >"Anon are sleepovers your fetish?"
  22. >Grab Fluttershy
  23. >Drag her inside
  24. >Slam the door
  25. YOU ARE IN THE BEDROOM
  26. YOU SEE CRAB FLUTTERSHY
  27. SHE HAS NO MITTENS
  28. HER CLAWS ARE MENACING
  29. OBVIOUS EXITS ARE:
  30. BATHROOM, KITCHEN, LIVING ROOM
  31. AND CRAB FLUTTERSHY'S ULTIMATE LAIR OF AWESOMENESS
  32. >this was the best night ever
  33.  
  34. ------
  35.  
  36. >Day 217 in Equestria.
  37. >Stuck inside all day, weather team has rain scheduled till nightfall.
  38. >Knock at the door.
  39. >It's Fluttershy standing there in the rain.
  40. >"Hi Anon."
  41. "Fluttershy I'm really not in the mood for any of that fetish stuff today."
  42. >"Oh that's okay, I thought we could stay inside and play a board game... if that's okay with you. "
  43. "I don't think so, pony board games aren't much fun. It's all Candyland this and chutes and ladders that and- "
  44. >"I brought Jumanji."
  45. "I WANT IT GIVE IT HERE YOU VILE TEMPTRESS!"
  46. >The two of you sit down on the floor and you take the first turn.
  47. >Roll a six.
  48. In the jungle you must wait till the dice read five or eight.
  49. >"Gee that's a tough break Anon."
  50. >She turns around and lifts her tail to the side.
  51. >"So... do you want to just... climb in?"
  52. >Pick Flutters' ass up and throw her out the door.
  53. >Throw the game out after her.
  54. >In the rain she can sit, till you manage to give a shit.
  55.  
  56. -----
  57.  
  58. >Day ninety seven
  59. >Living in Equestria
  60. >A knock at the door
  61.  
  62. >There sits Fluttershy
  63. >"Good morning to you Anon"
  64. "What is it Flutters?"
  65.  
  66. >"Well Anon, you see..."
  67. >"I think I know your fetish"
  68. >"Could it be haiku?"
  69.  
  70. "You're wrong Fluttershy"
  71. "My fetish isn't haikus"
  72. >Fucking Fluttershy
  73.  
  74. -----
  75.  
  76. >Fucking Fluttershy
  77. >"So I'm guessing that backwards day isn't your fetish either then?"
  78. "Sorry Fluttershy, but lacy underwear isn't my fetish"
  79. >"So Anon, do you like what you see?"
  80. >Why would a pony even wear underwear?
  81. >She's wearing a pair of pink lacy underwear
  82. >"Well I just came back from Rarity's place with some new clothes and I wanted to show you"
  83. "What do you need, Flutters?"
  84. >It's Fluttershy, looking happy about something
  85. >There's a knock on the door
  86. >Day 493 in Equestria
  87.  
  88. -----
  89.  
  90. >Day 364 in Equestria.
  91. >There's a knock at the door.
  92. >Fluttershy stands there wearing what looks like some sort of old boat captain uniform.
  93. >You cut her off before she can say anything.
  94. "Fluttershy that's a really nice Captain Ahab costume and all, but fat chicks aren't my fetish either."
  95. >"Oh... well I was actually supposed to be a steamboat captain."
  96. "A steamboat captain? Why would you dress like a steamboat captain?"
  97. >"Because Rainbow Dash said Steamboats were your fetish."
  98. "She said what now?"
  99. >"She told me that your fetish was something about steamers from Cleaveland, isn't this what she meant?"
  100. >Slowly close the door.
  101. >From somewhere in the sky above you laughter rings out.
  102. >Damnit Rainbow, you are no bro of mine.
  103. >"So Anon, Cleaveland Steamers aren't your fetish then?"
  104. "No, and you aren't getting my Steamboat Willie tonight either."
  105. >You need new friends.
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