Maybe Tomorrow (Suzu route Act 2-2)

Maybe Tomorrow


I pop the tab on my third can of coffee and take a swig. Miki watches me curiously, but the rest of the table is preoccupied. The usual lunch group is assembled, minus Lezard, who's slunk off somewhere. Taro shovels down rice as fast as humanly possible to my right, while sitting across from him is Akio, slowly nibbling at his bread, face buried in a book. On the other side of the table from me is Hisao, who pokes at his food as if he were dissecting something for science class. He looks so distant that I almost regret bringing him to lunch with us. Maybe he would rather be with the student council after all? My eyes wander around the spacious cafeteria looking for those unmistakable pink swirls, but come up empty.

They're probably off doing some super secret student council stuff. Like overseeing the construction of a dungeon in the school's basement where they'll throw all the kids they catch skipping class. It would have torture racks, and maybe a bottomless pit, and...

“Do we even have a basement?” I think out loud, followed by another gulp of my coffee. Miki munches on some sort of pretzel, her expression thoughtful. She shrugs.

“I chonno. Whychdo youf ask?” She doesn't even bother to swallow before replying. I regret speaking up immediately.

“Are you trying to find the deepest, darkest place you can slink off to and snooze?” Akio says without even looking up from his book.

“No, I was...” I try to remember why I asked at all, but it's fuzzy. Suddenly, I think I need a power nap. Yeah, that's what...

I shake my head back and forth. Coffee. That's what I need. And I've got lots of that. I take another long sip, and then my eyes are drawn to Hisao, still absentmindedly stabbing at his lunch. Student council. Now I remember.

I give him a gentle kick under the table, and Hisao starts as if he'd just awaken from a nap of his own. I wonder if I ever look like that.

“Keep that up and you're not going to get any dessert, young man. I know you're just spreading it around.” I wink at him. He stares back for a few seconds, before finally breaking into a weak smile.

“Sorry, I'm not very hungry today.” Crap. What am I supposed to say to that?

I almost ask him if he'd rather be somewhere else, but he probably couldn't answer that without either lying or looking ungrateful for the company. So instead we pass the rest of the break making small talk about class, teachers, things like that.

Miki chips in with some new bits of gossip that I miss out on by nodding off, but thankfully nothing comes of it. She gently prods me awake as lunch is wrapping up.

“Hey Suzu, wasn't there something you wanted to do on the way back to class?”

“Was there.” I blink heavily. Some return trips to reality are smoother than others.

Miki jerks her head just slightly in the direction of the boy across from me, who's currently standing up and waiting for the rest of the group to get ready to leave, looking awkward.

“Oh. Right.” I guess I could do that. Talk with him, I mean, not... what? I desperately shake the various cans of coffee strewn before me, but every one is empty. I guess we're doing this au naturale. Wait, no.

Miki is giving me the look as Taro packs up his lunchbox and Akio finally wedges a bookmark into the object of his attention with a sigh. This is it, isn't it? It's my shot, my chance. I look at Hisao, who turns to stare back at me. The moment drags on and on.

This is painfully awkward. I flick my gaze to something off in the corner of my vision, then back to Hisao. He's still looking me. I realize I have no idea what game we're playing. But whatever it is, it's most certainly my turn right now.

Now I'm definitely feeling my way through the dark. Okay okay, enough of this.

“C'mon Hisao, let's get a head start.” I walk around the table to stand next to him, and then nod in the direction of the cafeteria's exit.

“All right, lead the way.” He replies, sounding a little relieved.


As we melt into the crowds that surge through the hallways, I'd be lying if I said my pulse didn't pick up. Being around a lot of people like this can be dangerous, if I fell asleep now I could be trampled. I can't help but wonder if another reason my blood is pumping faster might be the boy walking next to me, though.

“Sorry if our group is kind of boring.” I break the silence that hangs between us despite the roar of conversation all around. The movement of the crowd forces us almost shoulder to shoulder.

“It's okay. I just don't really know anyone there, so.” Hisao gives me a strained smile. I notice that he's trying pretty hard to avoid bumping into anyone as we make our way through the clogged hallways. Maybe he just doesn't want to risk crashing into me, I guess I should be flattered. Still, I hate seeing him look the way he did in the lunch room, so I press on.

“Don't worry about it, they're all okay guys. You'll get used to them, if you want to.”

“If I want to?'

“Well yeah, we're not going to force you to hang out with us against your will.”

Hisao nods sagely. He, uh, looks like he has some experience with that.

“It's not like that, it's nice having someone to eat lunch with.” As we walk, he glances out a window for a moment, before returning his full attention to the task of navigating the crowd.

“To be honest, it's the food.”

I try not to, but end up laughing anyway. “Is it really that bad?”

Hisao shakes his head, we reach the first flight of stairs up to the main floor and begin to climb. I find myself taking them two at a time, wanting to get away from a potentially deadly fall as quickly as possible. Five steps left. Four left. Three. C'mon, c'mon, almost there. If I fall asleep now, I could die. C'mon. My foot slams on the final step like a marathon runner crossing the finish line, except instead of a trophy, I get to go back to class. Go me.

Hisao chugs up the last few steps behind me, and I realize I had gotten distracted. He looks like he's already having some trouble, and there's still three more floors to go. Being in class 3-3 is suffering.

“You really don't like stairs, do you?” He asks, trying hard not to pant. I wish he didn't try to hide it. I wish he didn't have to be worn out from something like that at all. Not like, not like I wish he was perfectly healthy. Well, I guess I do. Which reminds me.

“And you really don't like hospital food.” I don't bother trying to make it come off as a joke.

He stops in his tracks and stares at me in complete surprise. People pass us on either side, give us curious glances, but continue on their way. Hisao is still frozen in place at the head of the staircase, looking at me like he doesn't know if he should be embarrassed or angry or some other emotion that plays briefly across his face. I stand there, watching and waiting. I'm not trying to put him on the spot. He's obviously new at this whole being different thing, he might not have even had any say in coming to Yamaku at all. He might feel like no one else knows what he's going through right now.

But he would be surprised.

I drink in the silence that hangs between us in this moment, like a bubble of air in the middle of a sea of words and motion and life all around. Sunlight pours in from the window, bathing the two of us in warm light that makes the sight of Hisao seem to blur around the edges. Watching him, I feel a twinge of something inside.

Maybe he really does seem familiar.

Hisao seems to snap out of some long thought process and begins to say something, but the words miss my ears as everything goes black. Moments, or maybe hours, or maybe days later I open my eyes to find my head buried in someone's chest, a pair of arms gripping my shoulders tightly. I look up to find Hisao staring back at me, his eyes wide. It takes a few seconds before I realize that he's still standing on the top stair, trying to avoid toppling backwards against my weight. For once my head clears in an instant. This could be bad.

I try to move back but trip against Hisao's legs, causing our tangled bodies to pitch towards the staircase. This is going to be bad. He lets out a noise halfway between a gasp and a grunt as he tries desperately to counterbalance our combined weight, but it's no use. Almost in slow motion, Hisao topples backwards, taking me with him. My mind fills with thoughts of impending doom.

As it turns out there, doom will have to wait. As we fall, I catch a glimpse of familiar figures coming up the staircase below us. It must actually be our lucky day, because Taro is leading the way. He watches us tumble towards him with no expression whatsoever.

There's a dull thump. We don't so much as collide as get stopped in our tracks, Taro's dense, solid frame doesn't budge an inch. My first thought is that I really should appreciate having him around more.

I'm able to lean back and detach myself from the jumble, pulling on Hisao to help him do the same.

“Are you guys okay?” Taro asks, completely unfazed. Is he used to people crashing into him like that?

“I think so. Thank you Taro, you saved the day.” I flash him a genuine smile to let him know that I really mean it. Next to me, Hisao is taking deep breaths and trying to steady himself. I guess I wasn't the only one who was fearing for the worst.

“What are you guys doin' on the stairs, huh?” Miki squirms past Taro and gives me her “you're telling me all about it later” look. I glance at Hisao again, who seems to be doing better now.

“Just taking a nap.” I say it as apologetically as possible. I know I don't have any control over it. But the fact is that I almost got one or both of us hurt. If my friends hadn't been here to bail us out, it would have been my fault if Hisao had gotten seriously injured or worse. And me too, I guess. But I'm used to tumbles and scrapes. Hisao is still new at this.

Besides, this whole thing happened because I wanted to cheer him up after he looked so down during lunch. And look how it ended up.

“Hey, c'mon Suzu, wake up.” Miki gives my shoulders a shake with her good hand, she must have thought I was starting to nod off again. It doesn't strike me as that bad an idea actually, but class will be resuming any minute and I can't risk making everyone late. I fight off the sudden wave of fatigue that threatens to wash me away. We make our way back to the classroom as a group, conquering the remaining flights of stairs without incident. My desk is the most comfortable thing I've ever felt, it might as well be made of silk as I settle in for some well deserved rest.

I raise my head as Hisao moves to walk past me to his desk near the window.

“Hey.” I'm fading fast, slowly crumbling forward onto my desk as I speak. “I just wanted to say I'm sorry about earlier.”

Hisao smiles, though. I'm told I look pretty cute when exhausted, I guess I can't say I mind. Maybe it works in my favor sometimes.

“Forget about it, it worked out okay. And besides,” he says, his expression suddenly growing pensive. “And besides, you're right. I do hate hospital food.”

He's still smiling. That distant look is still in his eyes, but I feel as if he's not quite as far away now.

My eyelids close, and I spend the rest of the class dead to the world.