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- >"Inky, darling, you simply must wake now. You got... um... rather intoxicated last night and passed out in my bed again."
- >Boy, if only I had a bit for every time I heard that before. >Maybe then I could afford my own bed to crash in.
- >"Five more minutes," I croaked, burying my face into silken sheets.
- ...wait... silk sheets? But that means...
- >This time I groaned.
- >That voice, as smooth as the sheets I was swathed in, now rang out like a siren's call mere inches from my ear.
- >"Do you know what time it is, sweetling?"
- >My ear twitched, tickled by a warm breath, and my tail curled up between my legs.
- >I was stripped bare of my weariness.
- >Butterfly wings fluttered as something -or someone- in the bed shifted closer to me.
- Whoa there, Inky, play it cool now. You're already in a pickle here, no need to give *her* the upper hoof anymore than she does.
- >"No, I don't," I said curtly, still doing my best to hide my face. "But I'm guessing you're going to tell me, huh?"
- >Oh boy, was she.
- >"It's nearly six," she purred.
- >"That means it's time for all sweet boys to get up and get ready for work."
- >This time I did look.
- >For the first time that day my aching eyes were introduced to natural light.
- >I had to squint against the burning haze, but was soon rewarded.
- >"Why hello there, darling."
- >My heart fluttered again.
- >Two azure pools stared at me, amusement glistening along there surfaces.
- >A smile played along two petite lips, two lips that I suddenly realized were painted a delicious crimson.
- >A lacy gown far too modest for my own liking coveted a lithe body.
- >The bow in her violet curls topped of the image perfectly.
- >She was the neon lights burning just outside the bedroom window.
- >She was the drug still singing sweet nothings in my veins and the blood throbbing angrily in my morning wood.
- >She was Manehattan's prettiest jewel...
- >...and it's deadliest.
- >Okay, I'll be honest, maybe it was that last bit that really got my motor running...
- >Now that you know my situation, all I ask is this:
- >What's a poor stallion such as myself to do?
- >I was naked, hard, burning to the touch, and at the mercy of the mare I'd once witness strangle a mother by the umbilical cord of her own newborn foal.
- >I'll tell you what I did.
- >I met those gorgeous killer eyes... and grinned.
- >"Hello there, Rarity, it does seem I'm waking up in your bed once more," I said slyly. "Fancy that."
- >"Yes, fancy that," she echoed, moving closer.
- >The tips of out muzzles touched briefly.
- Holy shit, is it hot in here or is that just me?
- >Rarity continued, that smile of her's melting into an icy glower. "Tell me something, Inky deary, do you remember what I said would happen the next time I found you in my bed?"
- >I didn't flinch, not even for a second.
- >"Yeah, you said you'd fuck me harder than a cucumber sandwich and then praise Celestia that you finally had a stallion that could fly you over the sun."
- >Okay, so maybe there were other, wittier, things I could have said.
- >But that didn't matter.
- >What did matter was that the ivory goddess before me no longer looked as if she was about to smite me.
- >Mildly annoyed? Most definitely, but I could deal with that.
- >"Tell you what, darling, I'll give you five minutes, and no more, before I give you a little reminder of what I really said."
- >Call me stupid, but I felt like pressing my luck. If I was going to really bullshit my way through this, than I might as well comment.
- >I propped myself up on one elbow and used a hoof to brush aside the curtain of black mane in my eyes.
- >"Come on now, Rarity, you don't have to put up such a strong front. We've know each other how long now? You can be honest with me."
- >"Oh, please." She rolled her eyes. "I'm going to be hearing enough of this trite at the club tonight, I don't need it when you're sober too."
- >Before I could offer my witty response, she rose to all fours and hopped down off the bed.
- >In a few long, graceful strides she reached an opal door on the opposite side of the room.
- >The room in it's entirety was an ivory so immaculate that I almost lost track of the white colored mare as she went.
- >Once at the door, she lifted a hoof to the doorknob, but then stopped.
- >She turned back round to address me know more.
- >There was no bartering with the expression I saw on her face.
- >Any remnants of the flirtatious banter from earlier had left gone her.
- >Now, there was only cold calculation.
- >"I'm serious now, Inky, never again. A lady needs a her privacy, especially a lady in... my kind if work. I figured you would understand that most of all."
- >I could only manage a shrug. >"Rarity, all I understand is that I drink and smoke way too much and wind up in my friends' beds. That's just my life."
- >The intensity in her gaze never slackened.
- >"I'm going into the bathroom now to finish getting ready for tonight. I'll be out in ten minutes. You'd better be at the club by that time."
- >There was no threatening 'or else' or 'understand that, darling?'
- >There was simply the slam of a bathroom door as she left.
- >I stared after her for moment, head cocked and ears strained.
- >A moment later I heard what I was hoping for.
- >Rarity was rummaging around her numerous makeup draws somewhere in there.
- >Ten minutes was a joke. It would be another hour before she reemerged.
- >"Yeah, fuck that," I said to myself, speaking loud enough so that I couldn't possibly go unheard. "I'm getting some more sleep."
- >And with that I turned right back over and closed my eyes.
- >Sure, Rarity was right that I needed to get ready for work, but sue me. I wanted sleep.
- >Besides, who was going to stop me?
- >Many had tried before to get the drop on Manehattan's second deadliest killer, and that many had taken a one-way trip to Mud Dauber's pig farm in a duffle bag.
- >Curling up in that pike of silk that must've cost more than my whole existence, I allowed myself a genuine smile.
- >Something told me that today was going to be a good day today. I just knew it.
- >Sleep slipped over me like a glove. I wouldn't get to wear it long, but I would sure as hell enjoy every second of it.
- >As fun as it was to crash Rarity's place, I had to admit that she was right.
- >It was nearing six-thirty and my lazy ass still curled up in sweet silky heaven.
- Come on, boyo, you need to get up and going if you want to support those bad habits of yours.
- >"Yeah," I conceded, as sudden surge rushing through my extremities. "You're fucking right."
- >That wave of energy coursed down my legs at mach speed and exploded out my hooves.
- >The resulting force was strong enough to tear me away from sheets and send my scrambling to my hooves.
- Alright, now we're getting somewhere.
- >I started for the door leading out, but couldn't help but glance.
- >Bitch may have been crazier than fruit cake salad, but... well... who am I to talk?
- >The next second I was gone, leaving no trace but a lock's whisper.
- >I made trail post haste toward the exit, yet found my attention drawn as I made it half way through the living room.
- >A pause, then a grin that curled my lips.
- >Setting upon pale sofa cushions were my passions.
- Cant leave without these, can we?
- >"Hell no."
- *****
- >The first thing I gathered up was obvious.
- >No stallion is complete without a thick, meaty cannon to give his name some credibility.
- >And when I don't need my thick meaty dick, I use the cannon on the sofa instead.
- >The deep azure glow of my telekinetic magic surrounded the ferocious revolver as I lifted it.
- >A .45 caliber hoofcannon capable of turning any chrome dome into red paste.
- >I took a moment to bring the pistol up to my eyes to examine the elaborate scrollwork decorating Lady Muerte's.
- ****
- >She was easily the most precious thing I owned.
- >A rose with iron petals blossomed on her mouth grip.
- >The rose's stem, prickly and thorny, branched outward, reaching all the way to the barrel's mouth.
- >Black was the gunmetal.
- >Satisfied that my baby was safe and healthy, I lifted the hostler next.
- >Tuffs of my matted grey fur got pulled and pinched as I work the straps.
- >The rig didn't fit me right -it was a but too snug around my chest- but I barely gave it notice.
- >I could afford the cost to notice it anyways.
- >After working with the damn thing for a while I just came ignore the aches and pains all together.
- >With the weight of Meurte pressing against my chest, I allowed myself to smile.
- >"Good, now I don't feel lopsided anymore."
- >Next was my trenchcoat.
- >....
- >That's it, it's just a trenchcoat.
- >Long, black.
- >You've probably seen it countless time in those cheesy, hardboiled pulp magazines.
- >There was nothing special about it except it's oddly deep pockets.
- >Bits and other assorted items clinked and rattled in those oddly deep pockets as I slide the coat on.
- I really need to clean this shit out.
- >And that was that.
- >A gun, a coat, a pocket full of shells, and a bunch of attitude.
- >What else did I need?
- >I was saddled up and ready to go.
- >About time to, cause this place was starting to get to me.
- >Everything in this damned flat was as white as a sterile hospital.
- >Honestly, it was a little disorienting to tell the truth.
- >I popped up the collar to my trench coat and headed out.
- >Just in time too.
- >I heard a door slam shut a room away and knew that Rarity would be coming out soon.
- >She was going to find an empty flat though.
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