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- >At Ponyville, inside the city hall, a young mare, with a white coat, and light purple and pink mane, observes some stallions setting up chairs.
- >”Try to have them be perfectly aligned; we don’t want to come across as bumpkins.”
- >”Sure thing Ms. Sweetie Belle!”
- >The stallions do their best to line up the chairs, three chairs sit side by side, and in front of them, a table. Further from the table, stands a single chair, under a spotlight.
- >SB: “You guys be sure to clear out. If what we heard about him is true, he’s very dangerous, and I don’t want you all to get hurt.”
- >”B..but Ms. Sweetie Belle! We can’t possibly leave you alone with somep0ny so dangerous.”
- >SB: “We’ll be fine; we’re the Cutie Mark Crusaders after all.”
- >Some doors against the wall swing open as a light yellow mare, with a large bow, comes running in, “He’s here! He’s here!”
- >SB: “What?! We’re not ready yet!”
- >“No time. Scootaloo said he’s already on the outskirts of town. Here, put this on.”
- >The doors swing open again, as a burnt orange pegasus mare comes in, “Did Apple Bloom tell you?!”
- >SB: “She did!”
- >S: “We’re so not ready!”
- >SB: “I know!”
- >AB: “Would ya quit yer gabbin, and get dressed all ready?!”
- >The three mares wrap red capes around their necks, on the back, is the seal of a filly on her hind legs. Looking over themselves, the doors slowly swing open.
- >Enter you, and 2 stallions escorting you. They lead you against the wall and to the seat under the spot light.
- >Looking at both stallions, you sit down on it, and bring your sword to rest against your lap.
- >The three mares walk up to their table, and take their seats, the light yellow one bumps against her chair, causing the cheap metal to screech against the concrete floor.
- >The white mare looks over at puffs her cheeks out at the yellow one, before clearing her throat.
- >SB: “So, ummm..we brought you here, to, talk about…maybe hiring you.”
- “….”
- >AB: “What Sweetie Belle is tryin tah say is, we’d like fer ya to work fer us. We know yer a mercenary for hire, and we have a job fer ya.”
- “I’m listening.”
- >The three mares look over at one another.
- >AB: “You ask him Sweetie Belle.”
- >SB: “I’m not gonna ask him, you do it Scootaloo.”
- >S: “ME?! I had to find him! I already risked my head, I’m not doing it again.”
- >AB: “Oh fer pete’s sake! We want ya tah take over Equestira!”
- “Run that by me again, I think I had something crazy in my ear.”
- >AB: “Ya heard me, we want tah declare war on all of Equestria.”
- “I didn’t know Ponyville was in the war games, when did this happen?”
- >AB: “It hasn’t, at least, not yet. We kinda were holdin off, till we got you to join us.”
- “Is this some kind of joke? You bring me here with promises of an awesome reward, and then you hit me with this stupid proposition? Are you completely out of your minds? To wage war on all of Equestria, you would need an army to match the Crystal Empire at least.”
- >SB: “We know it looks bleak, but we just can’t stand by anymore, with all this constant fighting.”
- >S: “The Elements of Harmony have been fighting one another for most of our lives.”
- >AB: “All we want is for things to go back to how they were, and if doing so means having to remove everyp0ny from power, then so be it.”
- >Hearing their case out, you begin to crack a smile, and lean back into your chair.
- “Ahahahahaha! So you’re gonna bring peace by declaring war?! Ahahaha! That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard!”
- >AB: “But we’ve tried tah mend the fences, but nop0ny wants tah listen.”
- >SB: “All of our sisters are so darn stubborn, they won’t listen to reason.”
- >S: “Yeah, and every day, more and more ponies suffer for it.”
- “And why should I care about this? I’m doing GREAT! I have jobs lined out the door, why would I want that to end?”
- >SB: “Because...why settle for being a mercenary, when you can be a king.”
- “….No, no, it’s a stupid idea. A suicide mission at best.”
- >AB: “It is not! We have a secret weapon!”
- >SB: “Shh! Don’t tell him that.”
- “No, tell me that. What weapon?”
- >AB: “Ah have a necklace, that can amplify the power of anyp0ny tenfold.”
- “The Alicorn Amulet, well, now I’m interested.”
- >SB: “So you’ll join?”
- “Let me see it first.”
- >AB: “No way, no how. Ya aint gettin so much as a hint, till I know, yer on our side.”
- “How do I know you’re not just lying? Like everyone else that “claims” to have it.”
- >AB: “Yer just gonna have tah trust us.”
- >A low, but haunting voice whispers to you, “She has the amulet.” Shocked, you slightly tilt your head, and gaze down to the side of your sword.
- “Are you sure?”
- >AB: “Course ahm sure, us Apples never lie, and..” As she prattles on, you tune her out, and continue listening to the sword.
- >Sword: “Yes, I can feel its power radiating from here; she has come into contact with it on several occasions.”
- “All right, let’s say I believe you, what do you plan to do with such a powerful magical item? You DO know it corrupts those who wear it, right?”
- >AB: You can see her expression take a more somber turn, as she sits herself back down, “Well, yeah, but we only plan tah use it on er sisters.”
- >S: “And that’s why we need you to get us to them.”
- “Hmm, you really thought this through, but I have to ask, if everything goes back to how it was, what’s the point in making me a king? Wouldn’t my power be meaningless?”
- >Scootaloo leans over to AB, and grins, “I was really hoping he wouldn’t realize that.”
- “Tell you what, if I do this, you let me KEEP the Alicorn Amulet.”
- >The three look rightfully concerned, but huddle around themselves to talk.
- >AB: “What do ya think? It’ll save us a bundle on havin tah pay him.”
- >SB: “But can we really trust him?”
- >S: “Yeah, whats to stop him from turning on us when we give it to him?”
- >AB: “Are ya’ll dense? Are sisters. They’ll have no reason tah hate each other anymore, and they’ll take care of any baddies, just like the old days.”
- >SB: “That’s a great idea!”
- “So, we’re in agreement then?”
- >The three mares all scream in horror as you somehow managed to sneak up on them. Scootaloo tries to buck, but you roll to the side, jump back, and place a hand by your sword.
- “Easy Sweetie, we’re on the same side now.”
- >Sweetie Belle tilts her head in confusion, “But I’m Sweetie Belle.”
- >Applebloom sighs, and gets up off the floor, “We’re in agreement fella.” Spitting on her hoof, she offers it to you, but you leave her hanging, “Hey, when ya make a deal with a pony, ya gotta spit on it.”
- >With a grimace, you reluctantly spit on your hand, and squeeze her hoof. The cold spit connects, and squishes as you shake up and down.
- >AB: “What do ya call yerself?”
- “Anon is fine.”
- >AB: “Well Anon, ahm Applebloom, this is Sweetie Belle, and you’ve already met Scootaloo so, welcome tah Ponyville.”
- >Exiting the big building, you take a turn towards the outskirts of town.
- >AB: “Where are ya goin? Ah was gonna show you yer house.”
- “I need to get my horse.”
- >AB: “Horse?” Curious, they all follow you as you walk over to the edge of town, to a dark patch of grass.
- >Placing your fingers up to your mouth, you let out a piercing whistle. Some birds flap away from the grass as a small commotion gets bigger, and bigger. From the shadows, a dark brown mare with reigns in her mouth comes out of the trees, and to you.
- >You place your hands around her neck, check her for any damage, and then walk to the side to mount her.
- “Heeya!”
- >She slowly takes some steps forward as she passes the three mares. Scootaloo looks her right in the eyes as she passes, and is shocked to see the horse make eye contact back, before looking forward.
- “So, where to?”
- >After showing you to your home, you lead the horse in, and close the door behind her.
- “All right, so where can a guy get some grub around here?”
- >S: “Who was that?”
- “Huh?”
- >S: “The mare, who was she?”
- “Oh, her? She’s my horse.”
- >S: “YOUR horse?”
- “That’s what I said.”
- >S: “She isn’t property, you don’t OWN her.” You look her in the eyes before chuckling.
- “I’m gonna pretend I didn’t hear that, so, I’m hungry.”
- >AB: “Well right this way! Ah’ll make ya anything ya want! Sweetie Belle, take Anon to muh home, ah just need ya to get some groceries right quick, Scootaloo, come with me.” She quickly drags her to the side, as you get moved away, “Are ya crazy? Don’t be pickin fights after we just got him on board.”
- >S: “Did you see how he treated her? How could I not say anything?”
- >AB: “Ah aint gonna lie and say it didn’t bother me, but we’re already in this. Just stay out of it, we don’t know her story.”
- >S: With a scowl, she moves to the door, “Lets find out then.”
- >AB: “Scootaloo!”
- >By then, it’s too late, as she bucks the door wide open, startling the horse into gasping, “Please don’t hurt me!”
- >S: “Ugh, sorry, I uh, didn’t mean to.”
- >”Who are you?”
- >S: “My name is Scootaloo, and this is Applebloom.”
- >AB: “You are the DUMBEST…Hi! Well, see, we just wanted tah make sure yer all right.”
- >”Yes, I’m fine, but, you could’ve knocked.”
- >S: “Sorry.”
- >”My name is Meadow Springs, and it’s nice to meet you, but uhh, could you fix the door?”
- >At Sweet Apple Acres, you look around the place as you walk with Sweetie Belle.
- “So, this is Ponyville huh? The birthplace of the elements of harmony, and the great calamity, that divided Equestria into a warzone….its dirtier than I imagined.”
- >”I know its nothing like you’re probably used to, but we have a nice charm here. I’m hoping our sisters can realize that again. Like maybe, if we just got them all here one more time, they’d remember why they were friends.”
- “Uh-huh that’s great, when’s lunch again?”
- >Sweetie Belle sighs tiredly and looks to the side, “Soon.” Reaching the door, she opens it and lets you in first. Walking in, you look around the old wooden home and casually stroll around.
- >Picking up a framed photo, you see a younger looking Applebloom, a big red stallion, an old green mare, and an orange mare in a big Stetson hat.
- “Is this Applejack?”
- >Before Sweetie Belle can answer, you hear Applebloom off to the side, “That’s right, long before the fight. We were so happy back then.”
- >She walks over to you and takes the photo into her hooves, looking it over she runs her hoof along the glass lost in thought. Your stomach grumbles out, breaking her from her trance.
- “So, my lunch?”
- >In the kitchen area, you sit at the table with a sandwich in front of you, Scootaloo to the left, and Sweetie to the right. In front of you is Applebloom, who served you the sandwich. Grabbing a hold of it, you take a bite.
- “So, who’s that old mare?”
- >AB: “Muh grandma.”
- “Where is she now?”
- >Applebloom lowers her head and sighs, “She’s gone, it’s just me an muh brother now.”
- “I’m sorry to hear that.”
- >S: “Hey, we’ll get her back.”
- >You chew aloud, and cock an eyebrow at her.
- “Like grave robbing?”
- >Applebloom laughs, “Sorry, ah should’ve been more specific, she left with muh sister an is now servin under her. Ah didn’t mean tah..”
- “Nah its fine, you just used up what little compassion I have.”
- >Finishing the sandwich, you sigh satisfied.
- “Ok, so who do we wage war on first?”
- >The three are startled by your sudden turn into warfare, Applebloom stammers out, “A..ah Sweetie, get muh maps from upstairs! Scootaloo, tha dossier! It’s under the sofa!”
- >They run and scamper around collecting stuff they need, and piling it on the table. You grab hold of the big map and look over it.
- >Finally done, they pant tiredly as Applebloom scoots a chair next to you. You turn the map around a few times and think.
- “Ok, what do I need to know??
- >“Why er ya askin me? Weren’t you the one who wanted tah declare war, and are a mercenary?”
- “True, well, umm…the first thing…is…Ok, I got it. Who are our neighbors? Best thing to do is start close to home and expand.”
- >”Well that’s easy.” She gets close to you and points at the map, “Now, we’re here, and over here is tha White Tail Woods. Fluttershy rules there, but doesn’t really cause us trouble. She’s tried tah get us tah surrender, but she wont risk hurtin her animal army. She loves them too much to risk their safety.”
- “Ok.”
- >”Over here is Zecora, but ya aint gotta worry bout her, she’s neutral, and ah friend. She wont bother us.”
- “Ok.”
- >”And over here is Canterlot, Princess Luna lives there. But..she don’t consider us a threat, she is more concerned with the other Elements. Celestia used tah live there, but..she went missin a long time ago.”
- “Ok.”
- >”So, in MY opinion, tha best thing tah do would be tah go after Fluttershy. She’s the wea..uhh, most passive. Ah think she’d surrender if she saw yer power, cuz she never wants tah fight.”
- “I do like easy wins.”
- >”Zecora is muh friend, goin after her is gonna make me right mad.”
- “Eh, kinda no offense, but you’re a medium sized pony. No match for me.”
- >”And Luna is an Alicorn, only a few of them around. Right powerful too.”
- “She sounds hard, but I have heard many things about Luna.”
- >”So, there ya have it.”
- >You lean back into your seat and think this over. Tapping your sword onto the ground, you inhale and sigh.
- “Ok, it’s decided.”
- >You point at the map towards the Whitetail Woods.
- “We’ll wage war on Fluttershy.”
- >AB: “When?”
- “Whenever possible, how long will it take you to gather your troops?”
- >SB: “Not long, they should all be getting out of work right now.”
- “Work?”
- >In the center of town, Sweetie Belle uses her magic to hold a megaphone in front of her, “Attention everyp0ny! We need every able-bodied stallion to report to Sweet Apple Acres on the double!”
- >Some of the towns ponies listen, and begin to murmur to themselves as they look over at you. Deciding to pay them no heed, you walk away with Sweetie Belle as she heads back to “base”.
- “What was that about?”
- >”What? I was just summoning the troops.”
- “Don’t you have a guy for that, or something? It’s not very leader-like to be running your own errands.”
- >Sweetie holds her nose high in some snobbish mannerism, “We are NOT like our sisters, sitting around all day getting fat while their people do all the work, we can get our hooves dirty.”
- “Ohh, is that so? Not afraid of combat?”
- >”Not at all, on the field, I’m called, “Sweetie The Sour.” Because I play rough.”
- “What field is that?”
- >She lowers her head and blushes, “The..hoofball field.”
- “Such a killer.”
- >”Well its not like we see combat everyday like you, most ponies don’t even acknowledge Ponyville much less wage war. The only who does is Fluttershy, and all she does is ask for our surrender.”
- “What do you tell her then?”
- >” “No”, and then she just says “ok.” And slinks back into the forest.”
- “Stop it, I’m gonna die of laughter here.”
- >Reaching the farm, you see tens of stallions lined up in front of Applebloom. Walking around the formation, you glance them over and notice that none of them are wearing any sort of uniform, just random articles of clothing.
- >By Applebloom, you stand in front of them and get a better look.
- “What uhhh…is this all of them?”
- >AB: “Yeah.”
- “What? For reals? Most of them don’t even look like soldiers, just..is that guy wearing an apron?”
- >AB: “Mr. Cake, yeah, he bakes cakes.”
- “A baker, partimes as a solider? Uhh, no wonder nobody takes you guys seriously. *clear throat* Listen up! Tomorrow, you will be on the front lines in what I’m assuming is your first ever battle. Things are gonna get intense, some of you may even die. With that said, I do not want to baby-sit, or have to worry about taking care of your sorry asses. So when the battle starts, just stay on the border of town, and leave everything to me.”
- >They all start whispering and talking to one another, wondering if they heard you right.
- “That’s right, I’m a one man army. However, should any get past me, I’m counting on you to keep the town safe. Is that clear?”
- >They remain quiet as most have a look of gloom, and dread.
- “I’ll take that as a “Yes sir.” All right, report to the outskirts of the Whitetail Woods first thing in the morning. Eat a good dinner, fuck your wives, and pray to whatever god you pray to. Tomorrow we separate the men from the boys. Now go home.”
- >They all begin to separate slowly but you remember something.
- “Oh, Mr. Cake!”
- >”Huh?”
- “Bake me a chocolate cake for tomorrow, and don’t hog all the frosting either. I want that bitch to be smothered.”
- >”Y.yes sir.”
- >With a look of fear in his eyes, he walks away as you come happily up to Applebloom.
- “That was good, I got a good feeling about tomorrow.”
- >The next day, you and your “army”, all stand at the ready by the Whitetail Woods. You spot a small group of animals peeking from the tree-line. One is a small white rabbit; he appears to be the leader. Sweetie Belle leans towards you and whispers, “Those are Fluttershy’s spies, they are her eyes, and ears all over Ponyville. And the bunny, that one is Angel. 2nd in command of the Animal Army.”
- “So, he’s big shit huh?”
- >Sweetie nods as you look down at your sword.
- “Think you can reach him?”
- >In that same deep voice it thinks, ”Hmmm…yes. Throw me towards the trees.” Gripping your sword, you unsheathe it and throw with all your might. It flys almost with a mind of its own, and buries itself into a tree.
- >Black and blue smoke tentacles slither out, and grasps Angel, he squeals and kicks as the other animals jump back in terror.
- >A bear tries to swing at the tentacles, but is jolted back by a force field. It groans upset before the other animals run into the woods. The bear takes one last look at Angel before looking at you.
- “Tell your boss I demand her complete surrender.”
- >The bear runs off into the dark as you laugh loudly walking to the trees.
- “Did you see that?! That was awesome!”
- >Pulling the sword from the tree, you look at the entrapt rabbit as he squeals and tries to move.
- “Squeal piggy! I wanna hear you SQUEEEAAAALLL!”
- >Shaking the sword like a snow globe, the rabbit covers his mouth as though about to throw up. Scootaloo yells at you, “That’s enough! He used to be our friend!”
- >You stop and look back at her annoyed, before sheathing your sword again. This time, the rabbit is tied to the outside of it.
- “Used to, now you are enemies on opposite sides. Do you think he’d go easy on you if the tables were turned?”
- >AB: “It don’t matter what he’d do, whut matters is that WE don’t do that. Not tah anyp0ny, and if yer gunna fight fer us, you don’t do it too.”
- >You exhale and rub your forehead as your sword playfully speaks to you, “You better listen to her, she seems really scary.”
- “Yeah, that’s real funny.”
- >AB: “Ah aint jokin.”
- “Huh? Oh sorry, no not you, I was talking to my..”
- >Suddenly the trees begin to shake alive as hundreds, upon thousands of animals emerge from the literal woodwork. Surrounding the entirety of Ponyville.
- “Holy shit.”
- >A small yellow pony emerges from the woods, with a giant Chimera alongside her. She sees Angel and smiles before giving you a determined look, “L.let go of Angel.”
- “No.”
- >”I’m warning you, I’ll..I’ll..”
- >Gripping your sword, you take a step forward and whisper to your sword.
- “Let’s use all your power on this swipe.”
- >”Looking to finish it in one shot huh?”
- “Yeah.”
- >The sword begins to radiate black as it collects into the blade, stepping to hold your bearings; you swing the sword straight up.
- >”What are you doing!?” Before the sword can scold you further, its energy releases straight into the air in a massive beam. The blow back sends both armies flying back, as even homes are slightly stripped of their roofing.
- >Over at Canterlot, Luna looks towards the beam and narrows her eyes, “Hmmm.” Trixie comes walking over next to her.
- >”What is it?”
- >”An evil far greater than the petty squabbles of the Elements, if only sister was here.”
- >Back in Ponyville, Fluttershy looks on in horror as the beam gets smaller and smaller before disappearing into the sky.
- >With the dust settling, your sword releases Angel as he hops away towards Fluttershy.
- “What the hell man?”
- >”That was all my energy, what else do you want from me?”
- >Fluttershy nuzzles Angel while crying, “Angel! I’m so glad you’re ok.”
- “Yeah, so, unless you want the same to happen to all your little animals, you’ll surrender immediately. I have powers even beyond what I’ve shown.”
- >Angel babbles things to her as she listens, “Oh, but, what if he ISNT bluffing?” he continues to whisper things into her ear as she shakes her head, “I’m sorry Angel, but I can’t risk hurting my critter friends.” She sets him down and walks over to you, “I promise to surrender, if you promise not to harm my critters.”
- “Fine, men, take her away.”
- >Some stallions come walking up, and nervously avoid eye contact with her as they just stand there.
- “Are you serious? Take her away already.”
- >One of the stallions nervously mumbles, “B..but..she’s an element.”
- “Oh for the love of..fine, I’LL do it. And you know what, I think I’m gonna reap the spoils of war.”
- >You motion for her to follow you as she passes Angel to Applebloom, she pets him and nods before following you. Walking away, you look around confused.
- “Come to think of it, do this place have a prison?”
- >You look back at Fluttershy.
- “Do you have a prison or jail here?”
- >”I don’t know, it’s been so long since I’ve been here.”
- “Oh yeah, I guess it has been.”
- >Fluttershy says nothing as you walk lazily through town, suddenly your sword groans, “What are you doing?”
- “What’s it look like? I’m taking her to my place.”
- >”Why?” You grin and chuckle
- “I’ll tell you when you’re older.”
- >”Umm..excuse me, who are you talking to?”
- “Huh?”
- >You look back, but continue walking.
- “My sword, I take it you can’t hear him either?”
- >She looks at you with a puzzled head tilt as you shake your head.
- “I don’t blame you, even Meadow doesn’t believe me, but this mother fucker can talk.”
- >You point at your sword, and unsheathe it to show it to her.
- “But for some reason, only I can hear him. I tried getting it tested and shit, but everyone keeps telling me “It’s just a sword” No magic whatsoever.”
- >”But then..how did you..”
- “I know right? That beam didn’t come out of my ass, I’ve tried. Still, he’s a cool guy. Bit of an asshole though.”
- >”Ok.”
- >Entering your home, you open the door for her, and let her in. Closing it, you lock it and start undoing your pants.
- “Welp, I’m gonna rape you now.”
- >”What!?” Leaving your pants and sword on the floor, you walk over taking off your shirt.
- “You surrendered on the condition I wouldn’t hurt your animals, you never said anything about you. Now bend over on that couch, butts in the air are hot.”
- >”I didn’t want to use this, but you leave me no choice now.”
- >She reaches into her mane, and pulls out a small silver necklace. Strapping it around her neck, you look at it curiously.
- “The hell is that?”
- >Suddenly it begins to glow as charges up, as it does so, your sword calls out to you, “You idiot! That’s the element of harmony! Grab me!”
- >You rush over and barrel roll on the floor before drawing your sword. Smoke erupts from it, and begins to crawl onto the walls and floor. Like a tidal wave it comes crashing over to Fluttershy.
- >She stands with no fear in her eyes as the black wave is about to wash over her. From the side, Meadow Sping comes walking out and gasps in terror, “Whats going on!?”
- >Fluttershy hesitates and looks to the side, dropping her guard. In that instant, the smoke wraps around her and pops the necklace off. She screams surprised before being slightly squeezed by it.
- “Dude, we don’t kill mares. We like sleeping with em, remember?”
- >The smoke loosens its grip before dropping her onto the floor. Like a serpent, it slithers across the floor and picks up the necklace.
- >Returning to the sheathe, the necklace disintegrates, leaving only the pink gem behind.
- “What is it?”
- >SWD: ”It’s the element of kindness, we could use this.”
- “How?”
- >SWD: “Watch.”
- >The smoke takes the element, and places it onto the hilt of the sword. Absorbed into it, it loses it shape as a butterfly, and becomes a small orb.
- >SWD: “Now do you see? Or rather, hear.”
- >Fluttershy’s eyes go wide as she hears the swords voice, “I.it CAN talk.”
- >SWD: “Correct, though Anonymous is mad, he has not reached the point of hearing voices that are not there.”
- “Hey.”
- >SWD: “Anonymous was simply the only one I could communicate with since he accepted my offer for power so long ago.”
- “Like I had a choice.”
- >SWD: “You could have died, that would’ve showed me.”
- “See what I tell ya? Total dick right?”
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