Anon's Kid (Satyr)

>As you sit on the couch stroking your cock, a knock is heard on the door.
>You stop petting Jimmy, your pet rooster, and go answer the door.
>When you open it, a horrendous creature stands there.
>"Daddy?"
>This half human half pony freak is standing in front of you.
>The upper half is human and the lower half is pony.
"I think you have the wrong house."
>When you try to shut the door, a yellow hoof blocks it.
>The door opens again and Fluttershy is there with the monster.
>"Ahem. Anon, let us in. We have to talk."
"How about you explain yourself right here?"
>She sighs.
>"Fine. Remember that night at Pinkie's party a few years ago?"
"It was a little hazy-"
>"Exactly."
>Your eyes go wide.
>No...
>No!
>NOOOOOO!
"YOU'RE KIDDING RIGHT?! PLEASE TELL ME YOU'RE FUCKING KIDDING?!"
>She shakes her head.
>You gulp.
>Then look at the thing again.
>A little bit of drool is coming from it's mouth.
"U-Um... What's wrong with... Him?"
>"Vivian is a girl. And I don't know, the doctors said that it was because of the cross species fornication."
>The grotesque thing sips up the line of drool into her mouth well after it touches the ground, slurping in the beetle that her saliva picked up as well.
>"Anyway, since you ARE the father, you have to watch her."
"WHAT THE FUCK?! WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST KILL THIS THING?!"
>Fluttershy glares at you.
>"SHE'S NOT A THING! And I need to do some errands and don't want her to be alone in the house again."
>She looks down a little bit.
>"Last time she was, I had to take her to the hospital to get her stomach pumped because she thought the dish soap was a new flavor of Kool-Aid..."
>Holy shit.
>...why do they make those colored anyway?
>"Anyway, I'll be back later today. Oh and I'll send over Rainbow and Twilight to make sure she isn't dead by the time I get here."
>And with that, she's gone.
>Well fuck.
>You stand in front of Vivian, a little shocked.
"So um... Want to come inside?"
>She nods.
>But doesn't walk inside.
"..."
>Both of you just stand there.
>"Can I come inside?"
"Uhhh... Okay?"
>"Thank you!"
>She walks past you into the house.
>Of course she goes straight for Jimmy.
>"It's a doggy!"
"No that's not a-"
>He pecks at her fingers when she tries to pat his head.
>She turns to you with a scared expression on her face.
>Then her eyes close.
>Oh no.
>HERE IT COMES!
>She throws her head back and lets out a loud wail.
"DAMN IT JIMMY! GO TO YOUR ROOM!"
>Jimmy screeches like the cock he is and hops up each stair in anger.
>Fucking kids.
"Hey hey um... Vivian was it? Come here."
>She runs over to you, her pony legs clopping against the hardwood floor on each step.
>Then she wraps her arms around you.
>"That w-was scary... He hurted me."
"You mean he hurt you."
>"Yeah. He hurterted me."
>You grab her hand and show it to her.
"Look, you're fine! You've still got all your fingers!"
>"O-Okay... What's for lunch?"
>Well that was quick.
"Um... What do you want?"
>"I asked mommy that. She said child support. What's child support daddy?"
"It's a terrible thing that will make it so daddy doesn't have a house anymore."
>She looks at you confused.
>"Why would mommy want that?"
>You shrug instead of calling Flutters a crazy bitch.
>Just then a knock is heard on the door.
"Come in!"
>It opens.
>Rainbow and Twilight walk in.
>Twilight smiles upon seeing Vivian and comes over to talk.
>Rainbow, however, is keeping her distance.
>She might not like the fact that Flutters cheated on her with you.
>You ARE the alien of this place.
>And you sure as hell wouldn't cheat on a girlfriend if an alien tempted you.
>Well... IF you ever had a girlfriend.
>Or if the alien was like smokin' hot or something.
>With giant alien titties.
>Seven of them.
>"Anon?"
>You snap out of your day dream when Twilight calls.
>"Hello?"
"Yo, what's up?"
>"Can you help me make lunch for Vivian and us?"
"Sure I guess."
>You follow her into the kitchen, leaving Vivian with Rainbow.
>As soon as you're around the corner, Twilight pins you to the fridge.
>"Look here, Anon. This is your daughter and I don't want you to treat her like anything less."
"Does that really matter? Can't I just treat her like a normal person? Even though she's totally not-"
>Twilight smacks you across the face with a hoof.
"The fuck Twi?!"
>"I'm not sure you heard me. I SAID don't treat her like anything less. Understand?"
"Fine..."
>She rolls her eyes.
>"Go back out there and be her daddy. Even if it's only for one day."
>Blah blah blah, fucking Twilight and her mouth.
>You go out there and see Rainbow sitting on the couch reading a magazine while Vivian is hanging by her tail on the ceiling fan just giggling to herself as she spins around.
"RAINBOW WHAT THE FUCK?!"
>She shrugs as you go get Vivian down from there.
>When you set her back on the ground, you look at Rainbow.
"What the hell is your problem?!"
>She stands up and walks over to you.
>She motions for you to lean down.
>You do.
>She whispers, "Look, I know you don't like this thing any more than I do. Why don't we just... Get rid of it?"
"But Flutters said-"
>"We can make it look like an accident."
>You think for a few seconds.
>Then nod.
"Alright..."
>This might be fucked up...
>But she's practically suffering anyway.
>You look at her.
>She's gnawing at the couch.
>Right then.
>Turn back to Rainbow.
"How we gonna go about doing this?"
>"A long fall... Maybe drowning."
"That's kinda dark."
>"WELL MURDER ISN'T EXACTLY A LIGHT THING, ANON."
>"What's this about murder?"
>Both of you turn to Twilight.
>She's giving you the same look she was when she smacked you.
>FUCK.
>THINK.
"Um, we were talking about crows! A murder of crows!"
>She narrows her eyelids.
>"Alright... Well lunch is ready!"
>Vivian comes running over, trips over her own hoof, and faceplants into a pile of shit.
>Twilight cries out, "Oh no!"
>She goes to pick her up.
>Rainbow walks past.
>Wait a second...
"WHY IS THERE SHIT ON THE FLOOR?!"
>Twilight turns to you while levitating Vivian, "You don't even care if your own daughter is hurt?!"
"THERE WAS SHIT ON MY FLOOR! SOMETHING SHAT ON MY FUCKING FLOOR!"
>Twilight huffs and then turns to walk away.
>When she does, you see Vivian's butt is covered in shit.
>Oh no.
>THAT COULD HAVE GOTTEN EVERYWHERE!
>You turn around.
>There's some next to the couch, a little bit on the couch, a huge pile on the carpet, and a streak that leads to where she faceplanted.
>How the fuck didn't you notice this before?!
>Oh right.
>Murder.
>You groan and go into the kitchen to grab the cleaning supplies.
>...
>Once the living room is a shit free zone once again, you go into the dining room.
>Rainbow sits on one end of the table and Twilight sits next to Vivian, helping her eat her food.
>A plate of sandwiches is there on the table.
>Fuck yeah.
>You sit down and grab one.
>As soon as you're about to bite down, Vivian screams.
>You look at her.
>She is staring at your sandwich.
>Then you notice she has three of them in front of her.
"Eat the ones in front of you Vivian."
>You bring it to your mouth again.
>Vivian lets out an extremely loud screech.
>"Anon just give her the sandwich!"
"No!"
>You glare at Vivian.
"Be quiet!"
>She cries louder.
>"Anon, give it to her!"
>Rainbow eats a sandwich in complete silence.
>Vivian cries even louder.
>Twilight screams for you to give Vivian your sandwich.
>You finally snap.
"VIVIAN! SHUT THE FUCK UP AND EAT YOUR OWN DAMN SANDWICHES! THIS IS DADDY'S SANDWICH YOU LITTLE SHIT!"
>Then as all three of them stare at you in shock and a little bit of fear, you take a bite of the sandwich.
>A terrible taste enters your mouth.
>When you look down you see...
>Flowers.
>Oh God fucking damn it.
>Good thing Vivian stopped crying though.
>She now eats her sandwich, occasionally looking up at you in fear that you'll yell again.
>Twilight sighs, "Are you happy? You've gone and scared her! And for what? Some sandwich you don't even like?!"
>"I was TRYING to tell you that YOUR sandwiches were in the kitchen! But noooo, you had to be Mr. Big Bad Anon and scream at a child."
"What do you want me to do then?!"
>"Apologize to Vivian."
"...what."
>"You heard me."
"I'm not apologizing to her, she was the greedy one here. If anything she should apologize to me."
>Twilight furrows her brow.
>"I said... Apologize."
"No."
>"Apologize NOW."
"Nope."
>She charges her horn up and aims at you.
>"APOLOGIZE TO YOUR DAUGHTER THIS INSTANT!"
"ALRIGHT ALRIGHT! I'm sorry Vivian."
>Twilight adds, "Sorry for what?"
"Ugh... I'm sorry for yelling at you Vivian."
>Twilight smiles and stops charging her horn.
>"That's better. Now give her a hug."
>Vivian puts her arms up toward you when Twilight says that.
>You shake your head and get up to leave.
>A blast of magic is fired at your ass, burning it worse than taco night at Pinkie's place.
"AGH SHIT! ALRIGHT!"
>You run over to Vivian and hug her.
>She giggles as she is in your embrace.
>Awww... She's actually not that-
>A gurgle sound is heard and then something warm runs down your chest.
>You let go and see vomit on your shirt.
"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING?!"
>You run out and up the stairs into your room.
>Then strip down and enter the shower.
>Fucking stupid kids.
>Ruining everything.
>Who would even want kids?
>You finish up your shower and head out.
>Nod to Jimmy as you get dressed.
>Then go back downstairs.
>Twilight is sitting on the couch with Vivian and Rainbow.
>Rainbow nods to you.
>"Hey Twilight, want to take Vivian to the lake?"
>"I'm not sure she can sw-"
"Well that's alright! We can teach her!"
>Twilight looks at you.
>Then to Rainbow.
>"Oh alright."
>Vivian gets up off the couch and walks over to you.
>She holds her hands up to you, "Up?"
>You are about to say no when Twilight makes a cough noise.
"Oh alright."
>Bend down and scoop her up in your arms.
>Vivian giggles in your arms.
>You follow after Rainbow as she leaves the house.
>Twilight shuts the door behind her.
>You look at Vivian.
"If you shit on me, I'll end you."
>She laughs and hugs your neck.
>"Daddy funny!"
>She nuzzles her head on your neck.
>Twilight smiles.
>Fuck this is kinda cute.
>Hopefully she doesn't vomit, piss, or shit herself.
>You make it to the lake without any accidents.
>Pull your head away from Vivian to see that she's actually sleeping.
>"Aww... How cute."
"Shut up Twilight."
>You nudge Vivian a little bit.
"Vivian. It's time to wake up. We're at the lake now."
>She opens her eyes slowly.
>Then they go wide.
>"Lake! Lake! Yay!"
>You put her down on the beach and she breaks off to an awkward sprint down to the water.
>Twilight smiles, "Aww, look at her go!"
>Vivian hits the water and keeps going in.
>Then her head submerges.
>Tiny bubbles come up to the surface.
>Rainbow smirks, "Aww, look at her drown."
>You try not to smile as Twilight runs down there to save Vivian from drowning in two feet of water.
>Then you approach as well to make it seem like you actually care about her.
>Twilight comes out of the water levitating Vivian with her.
"So she can't swim then?"
>"OF COURSE NOT! SHE'S ONLY A YEAR AND A HALF OLD!"
>Huh.
>Didn't even know that.
>Rainbow goes into the water, "Come on in you guys, the water is great."
>"VIVIAN CAN'T SWIM!"
>"Make her some floats Twi. You've got the magic."
>Twilight puts a hoof to her chin.
>...
>Vivian is now in the middle of the lake with two pink magical auras on her arms which somehow keep her floating.
>Twilight is swimming with her just in case the spell fails, and Rainbow is floating on her back.
>Well...
>If there's any time to try to stage Vivian's death, this would be it.
>You dive into the water and swim down to the bottom of the lake.
>Scan the area to see if you're being watched.
>Sweet, you aren't.
>Then you grab a decent sized rock and swim up with it.
>Emerge from the water and take a breath.
>Alright, now how to do this?
>You swim close to Vivian and Twilight with the rock under one arm.
"Hey Vivian!"
>She turns to you.
>"Daddy!"
"Come and swim to daddy!"
>"Daddy! Daddy I'm swimming!"
>Twilight watches with a smile on her face.
>She makes it to you, "I did it daddy!"
"Good job! Now hold this for me."
>You bring the rock up to her hands and she grabs it.
>Then you let go and she sinks down into the water.
>"ANON!"
>Twilight dives down underwater and blasts the rock with a beam of magic.
>Vivian floats back up to you and then starts coughing out water.
>Twilight emerges as well and glares at you.
>Rainbow floats by, "She almost drowned!"
>She looks disappointed.
>Twilight isn't paying attention to her as she takes Vivian to the shore.
>You and Rainbow follow behind her.
>When on the shore, Vivian has just finished coughing up water.
>Twilight turns to you, "She could have died!"
"I know. That's why I did it. The world is a shitty place. I can't even imagine how much college would cost."
>Rainbow picks up a rock and holds it above Vivian's head.
>"Anon is right. Viv, I'm so sorry."
>She swings the rock down.
>Twilight stops the rock from crushing Vivian's skull.
>"No pony is going to college!"
>She throws the rock into the water.
>"When Vivian is older, she learn how to live in this world. And that certainly won't happen if you KILL HER!"
>Darn.
>What else could you do to get rid of her?
"Who wants to go to the Zoo?!"
>"Anon! Stop changing the subje-"
>Vivian jumps up and runs over to you.
>"I wanna Zoo! Up!"
>You pick her up.
"Look Twilight. She wants to go to the Zoo."
>Twilight grinds her teeth.
"You don't want to upset her do you?"
>She rolls her eyes and then sets off for town.
>"Come on then."
>"YAAAY! ZOO!"
>Putting on your best fake smile, you head off with Twilight and Rainbow.
>As you walk, you decide to make Vivian get even more excited.
"So you want to go to the Zoo right?"
>"Yes! I like Zoo! Zoo I do like!"
"That's good! We're gonna go see all those dangerous animals that could probably kill anything within a matter of seconds!"
>You wink at Rainbow.
>She winks back.
>Twilight turns to you as she walks.
>"I don't think that's something little Vivian needs to hear at her age."
>A light snore is heard."
>All of you look to see that Vivian is asleep in your arms again.
>She's kinda cute like tha-
>Her tail lifts and you feel her cheeks flex.
>*PPTPTBLLLBTHTTHPTLTH*
"I THINK IT'S TWILIGHT'S TURN TO HOLD VIVIAN."
>Twilight looks back when her name is called to see you throw Vivian at her.
>She catches her with magic and then glares at you.
>"What is your problem?"
"I don't know what you're talking about."
>She huffs and then places Vivian on her back.
>You arrive at the Zoo.
>It's pretty cool how most of the stuff in this town is free.
>Unlike back home.
>Fucking Earth.
>Vivian jolts awake when a lion roars.
>"AAAAAHHHH-Oh hey issa kitty!"
"Do you want to go see the kitty?"
>She nods.
>The three of you walk over to the lion pit.
>Then you set Vivian down on the ground so she can look over the railing.
>Twilight taps Rainbow on the side.
>She has an uncomfortable look on her face.
>"I have to use the restroom. Please make sure nothing happens to Vivian."
>"You have my word, Twi."
>She nods and then rushes off to the bathroom.
>You uncross your fingers.
"Hey Rainbow, do you think Vivian would like the bears or the lions more?"
>She puts a hoof on her chin.
>"Hmmm... I think the bears."
"Hey Viv, want to go see the bears?"
>"Bears bears! I wanna see the bears!"
>You pick her up.
"Easy easy! We're going to see the bears."
>Rainbow walks over to the bear pit and then waves a hoof for you to come over as well.
>When you do, you look over the edge.
>About a six foot drop.
>Maybe that would do the job.
>Either that, or the five bears down there.
>Rainbow looks at you.
>"Ready?"
>You quickly look around.
>None of the other ponies have taken interest.
"Ready."
>You lift Vivian over the edge of the railing.
>"Daddy?"
>And drop her.
>In your stupidity, you didn't hold her out far enough.
>So her back leg hits the edge of the railing, sending her spinning.
>She flips forward in the air.
>Her head smacks against the ground.
>She is completely motionless.
>...well it's done.
>Rainbow looks down into the pit and then back up at you.
>You both stare at each other for a few seconds, unsure if what you have just done has really been done.
>The sound of a bear growling is heard.
>Breaking the stare with Rainbow, you look into the pit.
>A bear is approaching Vivian while licking it's lips.
>You don't want to have a kid.
>This is what you wanted.
>Isn't it?
>Then why do you feel so awful about this?
>...this isn't right.
>Even if she's stupid, annoying, disgusting, and a freak, she's still your daughter!
>Without a thought, you vault over the railing.
>"ANON NO!"
>You land on your feet in front of the bear.
>Then you rush over and pick up Vivian.
>There's a cut on her head.
>Fuck.
>What if this is serious?
>The roar of two bears breaks your attention from Vivian.
>Two of the bears are slowly walking toward you.
"Nice bears... Niiiice bears..."
>One of them tries to slash at you.
>It barely catches you and cuts along your abs.
>Your blood immediately begins to make stains in your shirt.
"I THOUGHT THIS WAS A KID'S SHOW! THE FUCK HASBRO?!"
>The bears back you into the corner.
"RAINBOW! HELP ME!"
>You look up and see her frozen in fear.
"YOU STUPID CUNT, COME HELP!"
>A bear paw cracks you in the side of the head.
>The world goes dark.
>...
>You awake to a constant beep.
>Oh shit.
>A hospital room.
>"Don't you move now. You're on bed rest for the next few weeks because of your injuries."
>You see Nurse Redheart standing at the foot of your bed.
"Alright... Is Vivian okay?"
>"Why don't you ask her yourself?"
>She opens the door and Vivian runs in.
>"DADDY!"
>She rushes over to you and hugs you.
"Ow..."
>She stops.
>"Sorry."
>Fluttershy comes walking through the door.
>Behind her is a guilty looking Rainbow and an angry Twilight.
>Fluttershy walks up to you, "I gave you one job Anon... Just watch our kid."
>She sighs.
>"And what happens? I have to come and save you both from getting eaten by bears!"
>She furrows her brow.
>"You're the worst father ever."
>She turns around and heads for the door, "Come on Vivian."
>But Viv doesn't move.
>She stays right by your side.
>Fluttershy turns around and glares at her.
>"Vivian. Come here now. We're leaving."
>"I wanna say goodbye to daddy."
>She turns to you.
>And kisses your forehead.
>"Bye daddy."
"Bye."
>Vivian gets on Fluttershy's back.
>As she walks out, Vivian waves to you.
>...maybe kids aren't so bad.