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  1. Found by /u/woodiesvk on reddit
  2.  
  3. STRINGTABLE
  4. LANGUAGE LANG_ENGLISH, SUBLANG_ENGLISH_US
  5. {
  6. 20001, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0000=Photoshop..."
  7. 20002, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0001=In managed color!"
  8. 20003, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0002=Good day, and welcome to our show, eh?"
  9. 20004, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2370=We broke an egg, but saved the chicken."
  10. 20005, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2380=666 pixels - it's the dialog of the beast!"
  11. 20006, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2390=I feel a little less uneasy. Thank you."
  12. 20007, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2400=Cloudy, with a chance of buggy updates."
  13. 20008, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2410=I'm officially certified... or certifiable, whatever."
  14. 20009, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2240=I dream in Photoshop code."
  15. 20010, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2250=How many double clicks?"
  16. 20011, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2260=I found another inmate in the asylum who agrees with me!"
  17. 20012, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2270=I'm really looking for practical solutions."
  18. 20013, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2280=And I want a pony, too!"
  19. 20014, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2381=They really put the K in Quality."
  20. 20015, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2290=The flickering was at an epileptic scale."
  21. }
  22. STRINGTABLE
  23. LANGUAGE LANG_ENGLISH, SUBLANG_ENGLISH_US
  24. {
  25. 20016, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2300=We keep the acronyms confusing,^rso everyone has to come to meetings."
  26. 20017, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2310=I was hoping there was something we can do to make it suck slightly less."
  27. 20018, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2311=We built the parking lot,^rand once enough cars arrive we'll build the mall."
  28. 20019, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2312=I strongly suggest getting the Thor team installed."
  29. 20020, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2320=I only write code, not creative fiction."
  30. 20021, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2330=They really take the N out of FUN."
  31. 20022, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2350=Even the dogs surf there."
  32. 20023, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2360=You are about to be linked to the mothership.^rIf you want to fly solo, hold down the Opt key next time."
  33. 20024, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2210=Email threads of insanity!"
  34. 20025, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2220=Tom McCrema"
  35. 20026, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2230=Director of Photoshop Produce Management"
  36. 20027, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2190=No screams or profanity... he must not have opened my code yet."
  37. 20028, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2200=Sometimes, when I get bored, I troll myself."
  38. 20029, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2070=We've become professional bottlenecks.^rCan we add that on Linked-In?"
  39. 20030, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2080=In their world, sanity doesn't rule"
  40. 20031, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2090=This would be a great job if it weren^}t for the computers."
  41. }
  42. STRINGTABLE
  43. LANGUAGE LANG_ENGLISH, SUBLANG_ENGLISH_US
  44. {
  45. 20032, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2100=There! Fixed it like a vet fixes a dog."
  46. 20033, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2110=Yeah, look down my pants. That^}s OK."
  47. 20034, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2120=Call in the League of Extraordinary Douchebags!"
  48. 20035, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2130=She wants 143, so she can have a prime number."
  49. 20036, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2140=It^}s the little things like the color pickle^rthat make it worth coming to work each day."
  50. 20037, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2150=Virtual Hug! Virtual Highfive!"
  51. 20038, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2160=Yeah South Park, we love you too."
  52. 20039, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2170=I need to send out an email that no one will read."
  53. 20040, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2180=OMG, the Hue-cumber!"
  54. 20041, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2000=I^}ve got that syncing feeling."
  55. 20042, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2010=I don't want the automated hatemail from our sysadmin."
  56. 20043, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2020=After this ships,^rI never want to nudge another anchor point in my life!"
  57. 20044, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2030=What is Abe Lincoln doing with all those quadcopters?"
  58. 20045, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2040=Yak shaving and crank turning..."
  59. 20046, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2050=This is less scrummy, and more scummy."
  60. 20047, "$$$/private/Witticisms/2060=QE has been peanut buttered."
  61. }
  62. STRINGTABLE
  63. LANGUAGE LANG_ENGLISH, SUBLANG_ENGLISH_US
  64. {
  65. 20048, "$$$/private/Witticisms/3010=It^}s not an edge, imagine a rusty saw blade."
  66. 20049, "$$$/private/Witticisms/3030=Must be conscious to win."
  67. 20050, "$$$/private/Witticisms/3050=Wait ten seconds to avoid combustion."
  68. 20051, "$$$/private/Witticisms/3060=Some days, sixteen processors just isn't enough."
  69. 20052, "$$$/private/Witticisms/3070=Is my head physically spinning yet?"
  70. 20053, "$$$/private/Witticisms/3080=ToTest, NeedLessInfo"
  71. 20054, "$$$/private/Witticisms/3085=Is that Trello or Solitaire on your desktop?"
  72. 20055, "$$$/private/Witticisms/3090=It is organized... stochastically."
  73. 20056, "$$$/private/Witticisms/4000=I didn^}t want to bite myself in the face later."
  74. 20057, "$$$/private/Witticisms/4040=Tinsel hung by the toolbar with care..."
  75. 20058, "$$$/private/Witticisms/4050=I^}m very, maybe, confident."
  76. 20059, "$$$/private/Witticisms/4060=Cesium is very fun in the bathtub."
  77. 20060, "$$$/private/Witticisms/4070=Slider values should go to awesome."
  78. 20061, "$$$/private/Witticisms/4080=We^}ll complicate things as we have time."
  79. 20062, "$$$/private/Witticisms/4110=Reentrant is a four letter word."
  80. 20063, "$$$/private/Witticisms/4120=We will want to uppity that after the dirt release."
  81. }
  82. STRINGTABLE
  83. LANGUAGE LANG_ENGLISH, SUBLANG_ENGLISH_US
  84. {
  85. 20064, "$$$/private/Witticisms/4140=It's like noting that the third floor window is unlocked,^rwhen the front door is, too."
  86. 20065, "$$$/private/Witticisms/4160=The day the cash cow adopted a white elephant."
  87. 20066, "$$$/private/Witticisms/4170=Our Goddess broke the build!"
  88. 20067, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0410=Let^}s see what the OCD has to say about that."
  89. 20068, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0420=The Last Of The Icons!"
  90. 20069, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0520=She^}s gonna slug me.^rAnd I^}m gonna deserve it, too."
  91. 20070, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0640=Ewwww. That UI puts the F in fugly."
  92. 20071, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0650=Everywhere we look, endless cans of worms."
  93. 20072, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0780=I^}d rather shave my head^rwith a cheese grater."
  94. 20073, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0800=We want an update by noon^ror we friend your mother on Facebook."
  95. 20074, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0810=Go Stella Go!"
  96. 20075, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0820=Oh, he^}s just allergic to decision making."
  97. 20076, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0850=Sent from my slide ruler, apologies for rounding errors."
  98. 20077, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0870=Wenn du etwas nicht weisst, frag Herr Internet."
  99. 20078, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0880=Crash logs don^}t lie."
  100. 20079, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0940=This team has huge antibodies toward anything formal."
  101. }
  102. STRINGTABLE
  103. LANGUAGE LANG_ENGLISH, SUBLANG_ENGLISH_US
  104. {
  105. 20080, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0970=I^}m not a cowboy, I^}m an Indian!"
  106. 20081, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0980=Pro-pixel intensifying fauxtanical^rhydro-jargon microbead extract?"
  107. 20082, "$$$/private/Witticisms/0030=I don^}t mind buying stuff if it^}s free."
  108. 20083, "$$$/private/Witticisms/7050=We have a longstanding tradition^rof learning by firehose."
  109. 20084, "$$$/private/Witticisms/7090=It was a hack, you know, but it was like...^r...a cute hack."
  110. 20085, "$$$/private/Witticisms/7120=It^}s death by 1000 IT issues."
  111. 20086, "$$$/private/Witticisms/7140=Find me a high dynamic range kitten..."
  112. 20087, "$$$/private/Witticisms/7180=An API that^}s poorly documented and buggy?^rShocking!"
  113. 20088, "$$$/private/Witticisms/7190=They hired the Swedish Chef as a coder."
  114. 20089, "$$$/private/Witticisms/7220=Is it time to pull the PlugPlug?"
  115. 20090, "$$$/private/Witticisms/7290=Share My Scream."
  116. 20091, "$$$/private/Witticisms/7310=Who or what is a tea control mugger?"
  117. 20092, "$$$/private/Witticisms/7340=We won^}t have a FrankenApp"
  118. 20093, "$$$/private/Witticisms/7350=A sev4 bug is four engineers looking at^rthe same monitor."
  119. 20094, "$$$/private/Witticisms/7400=I love that we make technology that pushes^rpeople to disbelief and uncontrollable profanity."
  120. 20095, "$$$/private/Witticisms/7870=Infinity does not play well with others."
  121. }
  122. STRINGTABLE
  123. LANGUAGE LANG_ENGLISH, SUBLANG_ENGLISH_US
  124. {
  125. 20096, "$$$/private/Witticisms/7890=It^}s like singing the phone book."
  126. 20097, "$$$/private/Witticisms/8120=QSF := Q && S && F where Q > S > F"
  127. 20098, "$$$/private/Witticisms/8150=Ah, it^}s lost in the event handler mystery void!"
  128. 20099, "$$$/private/Witticisms/8180=Photoshop: The tube amp of digital imaging"
  129. 20100, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  130. 20101, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  131. 20102, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9800=Copyrighted material appearing in this space^ris the property of the copyright holder"
  132. 20103, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9810=I am rubber."
  133. 20104, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9815=You are glue."
  134. 20105, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9820=Adobe Transient Witticisms^T are only in^rproducts by Adobe Systems Incorporated"
  135. 20106, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9830=Adobe Transient Witticisms is a^rtrademark of Adobe Systems Incorporated."
  136. 20107, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  137. 20108, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  138. 20109, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9845=And now..."
  139. 20110, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9850=From the Home Office on the back porch of^rBoone^}s Farm (slogan: ^[Uh whut?^])"
  140. 20111, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9860=Top Ten Signs of the Apocalypse:"
  141. }
  142. STRINGTABLE
  143. LANGUAGE LANG_ENGLISH, SUBLANG_ENGLISH_US
  144. {
  145. 20112, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9870=...wait, sorry, that was last night^}s;^rhere we go..."
  146. 20113, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9880=Top Ten Signs the Engineering Team has been^rWorking Too Hard:"
  147. 20114, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9890=10. The team has a safe word,^rand uses it on a daily basis."
  148. 20115, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9900=9. They get sloppy with their Latin ^[VOLO EUNT DOMUS^]."
  149. 20116, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9910=8. They're not so shocked at the Nibgate Scandal."
  150. 20117, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9920=7. They found a way to rickroll managers^ras part of routine testing."
  151. 20118, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9930=6. The beer disappears faster than^rthe bottled water."
  152. 20119, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9940=5. They're taunting customers with^rhints of a contra code..."
  153. 20120, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9950=4. Content Aware Fill can't compete^rwith the Margarita Machine!"
  154. 20121, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9960=3. Wit requires BRC approval."
  155. 20122, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9970=2. The only cocoa they want to see^ris in the chocolate fountain."
  156. 20123, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9980=And the number one sign that the^rEngineering team has been working too hard:"
  157. 20124, "$$$/private/Witticisms/9990=1. Content Aware F-bomb!!!"
  158. 20125, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  159. 20126, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  160. 20127, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  161. }
  162. STRINGTABLE
  163. LANGUAGE LANG_ENGLISH, SUBLANG_ENGLISH_US
  164. {
  165. 20128, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  166. 20129, "$$$/private/Witticisms/1000=-1. We wonder what color -1 is????"
  167. 20130, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  168. 20131, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  169. 20132, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  170. 20133, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  171. 20134, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  172. 20135, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  173. 20136, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  174. 20137, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  175. 20138, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  176. 20139, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  177. 20140, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  178. 20141, "$$$/private/Witticisms/1001=Take off, eh?"
  179. 20142, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  180. 20143, "$$$/private/Witticisms/1010=The funny bits are done."
  181. }
  182. STRINGTABLE
  183. LANGUAGE LANG_ENGLISH, SUBLANG_ENGLISH_US
  184. {
  185. 20144, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  186. 20145, "$$$/private/Witticisms/1015=You^}ve been a lovely audience."
  187. 20146, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  188. 20147, "$$$/private/Witticisms/1020=We^}re here through Tuesday. Try the veal."
  189. 20148, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  190. 20149, "$$$/private/Witticisms/1025=Don^}t forget to tip your waitstaff."
  191. 20150, "$$$/private/Witticisms/1026=...because everyone could use a little change."
  192. 20151, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  193. 20152, "$$$/private/Witticisms/1027=You don^}t have to go home,^rbut you can^}t stay here."
  194. 20153, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  195. 20154, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  196. 20155, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  197. 20156, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  198. 20157, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  199. 20158, "$$$/private/Witticisms/1030=Without whose patience..."
  200. 20159, "$$$/private/Witticisms/1040=Andrew, Ann, Annette, Joanna, Karen,"
  201. }
  202. STRINGTABLE
  203. LANGUAGE LANG_ENGLISH, SUBLANG_ENGLISH_US
  204. {
  205. 20160, "$$$/private/Witticisms/1045=Max, Ronda, Susan, Jasmine, Joanne,"
  206. 20161, "$$$/private/Witticisms/1050=Kendra, Lisa, Max, Rebeka, Royce, "
  207. 20162, "$$$/private/Witticisms/1055=Rowan, Erika, Alison, Ranju"
  208. 20163, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  209. 20164, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  210. 20165, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  211. 20166, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  212. 20167, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  213. 20168, "$$$/private/Witticisms/1060=Goodbye, nurse!"
  214. 20169, "$$$/private/Witticisms/Blank="
  215. 20170, "$$$/private/Witticisms/1070=Long live the Duck!"
  216. 20171, "$$$/private/Splash/END=*****END*****"
  217. 20172, "$$$/private/Splash/COPYRIGHT=*****COPYRIGHT*****"
  218. 20173, "$$$/private/Splash/STARTSPLASH=*****STARTSPLASH*****"
  219. 20174, "$$$/private/Credits/AutoGen/101000=Thomas and John Knoll, Seetharaman Narayanan, Russell Williams, Judy Lee, David Hackel, "
  220. 20175, "$$$/private/Credits/AutoGen/101010=Sohrab Amirghodsi, Jackie Lincoln-Owyang, Rachel Magnus, Tom McRae, Christopher Butler, "
  221. }
  222.  
  223.  
  224. Rest of the file are Credits to developers, also available in "Help > About Photoshop" in Photoshop.
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