Autotelic Jacks Review - AIIRO REACHER (James May)

For timing reference if needed, in my ddream the first note falls on 0.039.

Some general comments first:
- Song selection is ok and your general idea for the jacks fits my pack.

- Downtime between 74.745 and 112.980 is way too long to justify the repetition that follows, you'll have to cut around the 74.745 mark for this to work.

- Oni difficulty doesn't make much sense, so I'll only consider the Hard chart for reviewing.

- This is already borderline too easy so I think it'd be better to have an additional harder difficulty chart with heavier layering and/or patterns.
  I'll mention ways to do it through the notes as I'm pretty sure it's doable without hurting the aesthetic you are going for.

- It's also very possible to make a dumber 'overlayered' practice chart, but I'll talk to you about this later through IM.

(1) 0.039 to 9.157
Use proper PR on all these piano notes.

(2) 2.392 to 2.833 and 7.098 to 7.539
Both intervals sound exactly the same so there is no reason for pattern variation.
Especially true considering this part is irrelevant in terms of difficulty and it's only a single repetition.

(3) 2.980 (and 7.686 repetition)
Feels pretty weird to suddenly include this as a mine when you ignore the same instrument alongside the piano melody on 0.039, 1.215 and 2.392.
It becomes particularly unintuitive because that instrument hits the same note as the piano on 2.392.
Make this a normal note on the same column as 2.392 and optionally make 0.039, 1.215 and 2.392 jumps. You could make these all mines too, but I don't really recommend that approach.

(4) 8.274 and 8.862
Hits of the same instrument in (3), treat it accordingly to your decision there.

(5) 9.451 to 28.127
The choice of columns after each pitch change of that repeated sound feels almost random.
It should follow patterns based on PR and/or difficulty (due to hand balance). For example, a simple approach to achieve both constraints would be using strict PR from 9.451 to 18.715 and then mirroring it in the following repetition from 18.862 to 28.127.
Also consider that PR should be consistent across the entire section so that, if viable, a given pitch should always fall on the same column (e.g. make the jack starting on 9.451, 14.157, 18.862 and 23.568 be all on column 4).
That's basically what I said on (2) but this time some variation might be warranted if difficulty is a concern. For this section, I think switching which hand hits that 16 note jack on 11.804 and 21.215 is the main concern.

(6) 9.451 to 28.127
Even with a minimalist layering for an easier chart, I think ignoring that crash (9.451, 11.804, 14.157, 16.510...) is a bit too much but I'll leave that up to you.
For the harder chart I would consider layering the sparse piano notes (same ones from 0.039 to 9.157). The spike of the 16 note longer jack is mostly unnafected by this added layering so it also balances a bit the difficulty of the section.
Layering the other sounds with continuous 8ths would force the following section to be retarded unfortunately.


(7) 28.274 to 32.980
http://i.imgur.com/UVF8Iik.png
Note that layering the percussion (yellow box) has nothing to do with that other sound making jacks, so it makes no sense to suddenly mix both things in the transition at 29.451 (red box) and 30.627.
Unless you add that big synth hit as hands to the layering (on 28.274, 29.451 and 30.627), you should have clean jack transitions to clearly differentiate what you are layering (e.g. http://i.imgur.com/pdEjcLW.png).

(8) 28.274 to 35.186
For the harder difficulty I recommend layering that big synth hit I mentioned on (7) which falls on 28.274, 29.451, 30.627, 32.980 and 34.157.

(9) 32.980 to 35.186
Patterning feels a bit random but it's not a big concern for a string of jumps like this. Just make sure that the transition in and out of this part flows well afters modifying the surrounding patterns.

(10) 35.333 to 37.098
It's not 'wrong' to step this as a jumptrill but I think it doesn't make justice to the actual song dynamic.
If you tone down the layering to single note 16ths you can represent both the big synth at 35.333 and 36.510, the phasing out from 35.333 to 36.510, the phasing in from 36.510 to 37.024 and the last note on 37.098.
Something like http://i.imgur.com/cCf8NjV.png for example. For consistency with the previous suggestions for each difficulty, you could include the jumps for the synth on 35.333 and 36.510 only in the harder diff.

(11) 37.700 to 74.635
General remark for this whole section: there is a stark difference in hitting one handed jump jacks (i.e. [12] or [34]) and split jump jacks (i.e. [13], [14], [23] or [24]), especially for those longer 12-note jump jacks (e.g. 40.039 to 41.657).
For this reason I expect some degree of intentionality in which kind of jump jack you use at each time (e.g. use exclusively one handed jump jacks in the 12-note jacks of the easier diff, accent additional sounds by using split jump jacks, etc).
And while I don't expect you to follow its PR exactly (which would mean repeating the same jump jack patterns for the whole section), the chart should follow some consistent scheme instead of the current randomness.
Additionally, you should remove all those mini-freezes on the jump jacks. It makes sense from a purely aesthetic standpoint, but it makes no difference in playability and renders standard DP scoring meaningless.

(12) 37.700 to 74.635
Regardless of correctness, most of those 24th or 32nd bursts are way too hard and unrelated to jacks. For instance, I can trivially hit the jacks of this chart on 1.4x but start having trouble with those bursts on 1.2x.
Considering the stark difference in speed between 8ths and 24ths/32nds, if you really insist on having those sounds as notes you shouldn't go beyond very easy patterns for 24ths and straight rolls for 32nds.
I personally think it'd be totally fine to have those as mines instead, considering how they sound. Smart usage of freezes could work too.
Whatever you pick, it shouldn't be harder than the jump jacks.


(13) 39.451
This kick after the jump jacks is pretty much the same as 41.804, 44.157, 46.510, 48.862 and so on, it makes no sense to put mines here.

(14) 39.892
It's better to avoid anchoring unrelated 8ths to the actual jump jacks right after.

(15) 39.965
Way too soft to warrant the break of flow of a 16th preceding the 8th jacks on the same hand.

(16) 42.980 to 43.274 and 52.392 to 52.686
Those are actually 3 repetitions of a fading out 32nd ascending triplet. Also see (12).

(17) 44.157
Does not warrant a hand.

(18) 44.340 and
Actually starts on 44.304 (16th).

(19) 44.524
Arbitrary transition from the sound starting on 44.304. Either make everything a single roll starting on 44.304 or make 44.304 be a jump with one of the rolls ending at this timestamp.

(20) 46.510 to 45.951
46.510 = 46.804 and 46.657 = 46.951, so either make a repetition or something symmetrical.

(21) 48.862 to 49.451
Same as 39.451 to 40.039, be consistent.

(22) 55.333
That sound actually starts on the 55.039 4th.

(23) 55.921
Considering this freeze only makes sense with that other sound starting alongside the one in (22), it's a bit confusing to begin a new freeze here.
Either put two freezes starting on 55.921 or extend the the freeze on (22) to represent that sound with longer duration.
Alternatively, remove the note from (22) and keep this one as is.

(24) 56.510 to 56.951, 58.862 to 60.480, 61.215 to 61.657, 63.568 to 65.186, 65.921 to 66.362, 68.274 to 69.892, 72.980 to 74.598
Note that in those intervals you don't represent at all that added synth mentioned on (23).
To keep up with song progression I strongly recommend accenting it in some way (e.g. switching to split jump jacks like mentioned in (11) for the easier chart and using hands in the harder chart).

(25) 57.098 to 57.539, 66.510 to 66.877
Those are actually 24ths (or 48ths depending on how you interpret that buzzing sound) and end at the 8th on 57.539/66.951. Also see (12).

(26) 57.686 to 58.274, 67.098 to 67.686
Having the freeze in the same hand of one of the jacks (freeze on 4 and jack on 3 in this case) is unnecessarily mean if hit legit and dumb if manipulated.
I recommend isolating the hand hitting the freeze in those cases (e.g. jump jack on [12] and freeze on 4).

(27) 61.068
Doest not warrant a jump.

(28) 61.804 to 62.000 and 71.215 to 71.412
Same as (16) but cutting off earlier

(29) 62.000 to 62.355
It isn't neatly quantized but those are approximately 24ths ending on 62.343.

(30) 62.392 to 62.980
Similar to (24) but the synth isn't present on every 8th so the approach might have to be a bit different here.

(31) 62.980 to 63.568
Same as (17), (18) and (19).

(32) 64.745
Same as (22).

(33) 65.701
Ghost note.

(34) 71.412 to 71.804
Not sure about the exact timings, but this is actually slowing down.

(35) 75.333
Cut around here.