MASS EFFECT 2

AAAAAAA WHAT RHE FUCK IS HAPPENJNG
WHERE IS MY BOYFRIEND AND ALL MY OTHER FRIENDS
IF JOKER DIES I FUCKING RIOT
AAAAAAAAAAA

I like Jacob already but Miranda seems like a goddamn bitch
Still no mention of Kaidan...you'd think he would come up..........
Armor customization! Nice!!! THE DA ONE
The illusive man is Jed Bartlet omfg
I hate that I'm working for Cerberus they seem so gross and shady, Violet doesn't like this at all
TALI!!! Shouldn't she be more excited to see me? Shit, I wanted a hug or eagerness or something!!

Okay so the illusive man told me where my team is but there is absolutely zero reason why I can't contact Kaidan................I want
Like can I at least tell him I'm alive??? TBH that would be one of Violet's first priorities
JOKER!!!!!!!!! 😍😍😍
This new Normandy is cool and all but damn I hate that I just got adjusted to the old one and now I have to readjust
Are they ever gonna fix the scars on her face? They're pretty damn glaring

Man this is cool but something just feels so wrong. I reeeeally don't like working for this Cerberus
Oh wow I have to manually pilot this shit? And buy fuel? Gross man

Omega is such a shithole
GARRUS!!!!!!
I want to hug him
Honestly this whole recruitment mission of his has already done more to endear him to me than the entire first game did. We bros now.

Alright, Miranda MIGHT be interesting and potentially not terrible
Mordin is funny dude

Christ, every time I try to talk to Jacob and get to know him in a TOTALLY PLATONIC AND FRIENDLY MANNER, Shep automatically starts flirting and I'm just NO!!!!! I DONT WANT THIS!!!!! SHE LOVES KAIDAN STOP

Okay I got the brandy for Doctor Chakwas and gave it to her and…that scene was so fucking cute…like it was just this little moment but it was so cute and pure…I really really loved that. I hope this game is sprinkled with little moments like that.

Kelly is a cutie but she’d better not become the new DAI Requisitions officer. “Nothing to report ser” NO ONE ASKED

Okay but I love the engineering pair. They're great. Almost fitzsimmons but not.

This whole collecting resources thing is gonna get real annoying, I can already tell

Man I’m so eager to get to the Citadel…I want to see Anderson and I want to see the fallout from the first game and everyone reacting to Shep being alive, and maybe there’ll be a mention of Kaidan?? Maybe???? Jeez like please just give me one line of acknowledgement

>recovers Intel on Cerberus
>edi: this would be very damaging to Cerberus if it were made public
>uploads that shit to the alliance
>fuck you Cerberus Violet is loyal to the ALLIANCE not you scumbags

Fuck this its CITADEL TIME

Aaaaaaaand now I'm kind of wishing I had let the council die. What a load of douchebags.
Anderson my mannnnnn, being excellent as always. Bless him.
Oh thank goodness they let me ask about Kaidan. Sucks it's some bullshit answer but at least I got the option to ask. Damn he probably doesn't even know she's alive does he? Thiskillstheman.jpg

Omg random news panel tells me there's now a SHEPARD SCHOLARSHIP on earth to help underprivileged kids like she was...I'm not crying you are
Other news panel tells me that L2 biotics got reparations! From that side quest I did in 1! That was cool!!

Kasumi seems cool! That whole mission was pretty cool TBH. Violet looked hot 👌🏻 it was definitely different and I enjoyed the whole heist aspect of it. I feel bad for poor Kasumi and her lost love :(

Headcanon time: Violet hasn't been feeling herself since Lazarus. She's troubled. She hates working with Cerberus, she hates that her old crew is gone, she hates that she lost two damn years, she hates that some of her friends still think she's dead, she hates that the council still doesn't fucking believe her...everything just feels kind of fcked up.

Eugh, this Okeer seems like a ruthless jackass. Don't tell me I actually have to recruit him...
Oh good bye
Good morning baby Krogan!
Grunt...he cool. We gon be cool.

Time to get Jack!
Dang this warden is a fucking moron. He clearly doesn't know who he's dealing with
Jack more like jackass
Let's see if we can defrost this ice queen
I like that she's bitchy to Miranda 😎
Trust me babe I don't want to be with Cerberus either

AHHHH ILLUSIVE MAN IS TELLING ME KAIDAN IS ON THIS PLANET AAAAAAAA
GONNA GO SEE THE BAE
NO DONT TOUCH HIM
IM SO STRESSED
WHERE IS HE!!!!!!!!!

Okay see THIS is why I'm pissed off
So I got my reunion and even a hug and that was great
But Kaidan goes on about how she didn't even try to contact him or tell him she was alive, and that's wHAT IVE BEEN SAYING since the start--she WOULD have tried!! But I didn't get that option!!!!! And he says "I loved you" and I didn't get a chance to say it back??? No matter which option I picked she didn't seem to express any real affection towards him, she didn't seem to have any of the feelings from the first game, and that's just nonsensical because it hasn't even been two years to her, in her POV she only parted with him a little while ago, so she definitely still really cares about him/loves him even, but I had no option to express that and I'm pissed!
I understand Kaidan's perspective, I understand why he'd feel resentment towards her, and the fact that she gave such weak and indifferent responses only justifies how he feels. But I'm goddamn pissed that those weak responses were all I had. That shit's messed up.
Hell, she didn’t even get to express any kind of alarm or concern when the Collector ship was taking off and it was entirely possible that Kaidan was on board! She was just like “oh well it’s gone.” GLAD SHE HAS THE OPTION TO CARE. THANKS FOR NOTHING BIOWARE.
>grumpily makes up headcanon about Violet repressing her emotions and being bad at handling feelings and shit

Wow, I don't trust this illusive man for a goddamn second. He's a fuck and I hate working with Cerberus. HATE IT

Headcanon: Violet's been drinking a lot lately. It gets her mind off things. She's been feeling really out of sorts. She's growing a little more cynical, too.

Miranda and Jacob both have daddy issues. Is that a Cerberus requirement?
Man I wish they would let me talk to Kasami, considering she's one of the new recruits that I actually like so far
So basically Cerberus wanted me to recruit Jack so they could get their claws into her. Fuck that. I hate them.

Bluh I hate being bombarded with 7 different quests at once. 3 new recruits, Admiral Hackett's friend, Miranda and Jacob's loyalty quests, and whatever other side quests there are. Where to start...
Aight I'm gonna go get Tali first because <3
Oh wait, Hackett's friend thing is the DLC I'm supposed to do last. Noted!

Oh hey, her facial scars are healed! Guess being a paragon pays off?

Tali!!! <3
My girl <3

I love every single dialogue option that lets me stick it to Cerberus. Fuck them
Jacob to Tali: make sure you introduce yourself to the ship's new AI!
Tali: this fucking bitch--

I love getting messages from people I helped in the first game, so satisfying :')

AAAAAAAAAAAA I JUST READ THE FOLLOW-UP MESSAGE KAIDAN SENT TO MY PRIVATE TERMINAL AND IM EMOTIONAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Gosh that was just what I needed.....................gosh 😭

Tali says Cerberus attacked a quarian ship to try and get at a young human biotic on board--Jack, obviously

Let's do Jack's loyalty quest next. Blowing up a Cerberus facility will feel oh so good.
Tali can come too, the Fuck Cerberus team is a go
To hell with that place. Poor Jack.

Alrighty I guess it's Jacob's turn
Just don't fucking flirt with him while doing it Shep jfc
Jacob's father is a piece of actual crap. Neeeeext

Ugh so many quests at once ;_;
I should probably go get those other two squad mates before continuing the loyalty quests huh?

Omg stop I hate when the illusive man sends me on a mission without giving me the choice of when to go...shit I still have two squad mates to collect I ain't wanna go on this collector ship yet wtf
This place is so fucking creepy eeee
The collectors used to be protheans...man that's fucked up
YO this is the ship that took down the original Normandy and fucked up Shep's life? FUCK THAT
Obviously it was a trap you dumbasses
I HATE THESE PRAETORIAN THINGS
I just wanna punch this goddamn illusive man in his smug face
I don't trust EDI. They made way too much of a point being like "oh thank god for EDI!! She saved us!!" Something will go wrong there, later.

Aaaaaaaa all my squad mates want something from me all at once it's too muuuuuuch
Gonna help out my girl Tali first
This is some BS. Don't worry girl we gon clear your name!!
Holy shit dude is that Claudia Black voicing a random quarian Admiral for Tali's trial??? That's definitely fucking her oh my god. Even her ideals and attitude are similar to Morrigan's. Jesus
Admiral Gerrel sounds familiar too. Hmm
Tali's dad!! Noooooo 😞 at least I was able to hug her. Poor baby.......
Damn, delivering that speech to the council was satisfying. That's my girl Tali. Love this girl. We ride or die now.

Like really though, why isn't it possible to chat with Kasumi at all on the Normandy? This is some bee ess

Oh wait wasn't I gonna go recruit more? Omg there's so much to do on Illium...RIP me

Parasini! Love this girl. She's badass.
Hi Liara! Wow Shep is getting so many hugs ❤️
Guess I'm going to go get Thane first! And I get to help take out that bitchy asari who made me kill her sister. Excellent B)
Wow, so she just slaughters these innocent Salarian workers cause they didn't get out of her way fast enough?? I can't wait to kill this frigid bitch
Gotta say, this city is really beautiful. What a cool design
Don't worry Salarian friends! I got you!
Nassana: Shepard...but you're dead!
Shep: I got better.
God fuckin bless.
Hmm...Thane seems interesting. Too soon to pass judgement.
But man, he sure is one weird looking dude.

Alrighty, time to get Samara. She sounds...fun.
Her code sounds like a load of crap if you ask me.
Dang she hot
Is it a rule that all asari matriarchs gotta have the tiddy out
"We forsake worldly goods except some weapons and armor"
>is wearing the most extravagant "armor" I've seen yet in game
Like, her code is to punish the wicked and protect the innocent, but it also tells her to kill a bunch of innocents who get in her way? That makes no sense
This whole thing reeks of crap TBH
Well, that was simple enough.

I like Thane, he's just...creepy :/
Tali is so fuckin cute gosh I love her

Miranda's loyalty quest now
Prediction: her sister will be okay but her friend Niket is gonna die
Or he's gonna betray her...
Or welp, it's both
Omg Miranda going to talk to her sister was so touching...she really is human after all :')

Samara's hunting her own daughter...ouch :(
Gonna go do hers next since we're not too far from Omega, hopefully this won't be too hard
Oh this actually sounds like it's gonna be fun...I'm gonna go back to the Normandy and put on Violet's sexy nightclub dress from Kasumi's mission B)
Dang. Violet must have felt so scummy and gross. She needs a long shower after that.
Poor Samara :(
I can't understand why anyone would choose Morinth over Samara, even on an evil playthrough. On the one hand you've got someone who has sworn an oath to follow you no matter what, and on the other you've got a serial killer who tried to make you one of her targets and will probably continue to try. What the fuck.

Back to the Citadel to help Garrus and Thane! But Garrus first.
OH MY GOD, I just got a random banter with Garrus and Tali on the citadel about the elevator talks. I'm dying. That was hilarious!
Stopped Garrus from killing his guy. I think that was the right move for Garrus.

Let's save Thane's son!
Shepard VI omg that is hilarious
Oh FUCK me, I lost sight of the guy and failed the mission. Fuck that. I gotta restart this.
PHEW, got it. Much better.
I like captain Bailey. He's a cool dude.

Just gotta do Mordin and Grunt's. Phew.
WREX! Awww he called me his friend!!
Don't know how I feel about Mordin's work...
I love being a paragon. She does so many good things. She is so good. :')
What a tough situation all around. I had her stop him from killing his friend, then have him keep the data just in case.

And finally Grunt! Sorry for making you wait so long bud.
Man, this planet is total crap.
OH JESUS CHRIST, she has to fight a fucking THRESHER MAW??? YOURE MAKING A SOLE SURVIVOR DO THIS??? DO YOU WANT HER TO HAVE A FUCKING PANIC ATTACK??????
There was definitely some catharsis in killing it, but that's gonna bring up some baaaad Akuze flashbacks/nightmares for a few days. Yikes.

I still think Samara's code is dumb but I like her.
Stiiiiiiill wish I could talk to Kasumi! I know she was a DLC companion but how hard would it be to stick in a conversation or two for her? Smh

Just downloaded the Cerberus pack so now I have the Normandy crash site...
Oh man she's alone? I was gonna bring Garrus and Tali :( but I guess this is something she needed to do alone.
Gosh...this is so sad.
All these pieces...
I didn't anticipate having to collect 20 dog tags, that's a bit annoying.
Can't find the last 4 wtf
All I see are fragile crates, unless--aha!
Gosh, poor Violet. I imagine she stayed out there for a long time, digging up every dogtag and taking a long time to honor the fallen, revisit certain spots on the ship, relive some memories, and think about all that's been lost. Gosh. :(

One more squad mate to recruit. Jesus. Ima comin, Zaaed.
Oh he's a DLC guy. Wait omg, there's even another one after him which isn't unlocked yet. THIS IS GETTING TO BE A BIT MUCH.
Oh, he's an ugly fella isn't he...
Well. That was a great first impression. And the easiest recruitment ever. Gonna save his actual mission for later cause...he seems icky. What even is the point of this guy

When does that last squad mate become available? Did all the loyalty missions except Zaaed who doesn't count cause he's DLC. Guess I have to go get that IFF thingy?

This place is c r eepy. Ugh I hate husks.
A geth? A friendly geth??
Have I mentioned that I hate husks? Cause I HATE them. Enough already!!!!!!!!
Why was the crew this enormous anyway????
They're literally just climbing out of the goddamn floor now
My favorite is when like 4 of them corner you all at once and you can't even use one of your attacks cause they're all hitting you. So fun! (:
Aww we're saving the friendly geth.
That was a pretty epic escape guys A+

MORDIN IS SINGING TO ME OH MY GOD
That was so beautiful I'm dying
And then the awkward moment of silence after. Come on Vi, clap for him!

Ah...so this is my last squad mate, huh? A geth. That is...so weird and unexpected. Well okay then. Bet Tali's gonna love this.

Okay so I guess I can see the appeal of a Thane romance, but he is still so creepy looking to me. Those red markings especially look like raw muscle, yuck. I mean, he looks like the creature from the black lagoon!
Regardless, Violet is still hung up on Kaidan. She hardly has the capacity to get involved with anyone else. Just gotta stick it out till 3...
ALSO, she said "I think my translator just glitched" when he called her siha, so FINALLY got some in-universe conformation of universal translator devices. There's that question answered!

Guess I'll go do Zaaed's thing just to get it out of the way even though I really super don't care
Lol I hope there's not gonna be a Legion loyalty quest too...how would that even work. Can I just use these two as cannon fodder pls
At least this planet is pretty. There are even cute lemur monkey things!
Wow Zaaed started the blue suns. Okay then.
I love how whoever else you bring on a loyalty mission is just...there. I brought Kasumi cause ~DLC buds~ and she's just chillin in the background like 'lol ok guys'
Yeah Violet ain't gonna get along too well with this guy.
Haha no sorry buddy. Forget loyalty. We save the workers whose lives you just put at risk by blowing up the damn refinery. Fuck you. Violet ALWAYS puts the preservation of life first.
Like honestly, what an idiot. He could've killed his guy without blowing the damn place up, and then I wouldn't have had to slow him down by saving those people.
Well I doubt he's loyal to me, but Violet gave him a pretty great smackdown in the end so that was worth it. Fuck this guy.
Oh wow, he actually is loyal. Haha nice.

Wow, Legion does have a quest.
 I guess even if someone didn't have an interest in helping this particular geth out, it really benefits all organics to prevent this virus. Let's roll.
Rewriting them seems like a no-brainer. It'll stop them from attacking organics.

And that's all my squad mates loyal. FINALLY.

Yeah Tali, I don't like working with them either. Sorry bb.

I'm glad I was able to bring some peace and friendship to Thane and Samara :')
The last 5 or 6 times I've tried to talk to Jack, I've gotten the "Shepard we've talked enough, stop pissing around" response. When am I gonna get that final breakthrough to be Real Friends? I neeeeeeed it
Oh my god did Mordin just accuse me of hitting on him. This guy..............what a jokester. Careful buddy, if you sing to me again I may not be able to resist

They're making me leave the ship behind to work on the IFF...keep my baby safe...
YO WHAT IS HAPPENING
I WAS NOT PREPARED FOR THIS
IM PLAYING AS JOKER NOW ??
WHY LEAVE THIS TO THE GUY WITH BAD LEGS
AHH MY CREW! KELLY NO
WHERE IS CHAKWAS
I REALLY DONT TRUST EDI
"I ENJOY THE SIGHT OF HUMANS ON THEIR KNEES" YEAH NO WAY THAT WAS A FUCKING JOKE
I BET EDI BROUGHT THEM HERE
FUCK!!!!!!!!
WHAT ABOUT MY CREW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I BLAME FUCKING EDI
SHE HAS WAY TOO MUCH CONTROL NOW
Man I was TOTALLY not ready to proceed, I have a fuckton of side quests left. Why does this game get to decide for me!! Like I didn't even do anything to trigger this, I just opened the map as usual to go to my next destination and it started. The whole ship is empty now minus my companions, does that mean I'm stuck? What happens if I open the map?
Seems like it's time for final chats with my squad mates. (JK seems like most of them are done with me) Ugh I'm still not ready to move on. I know I can keep playing after endgame in this one, and I have all the necessary upgrades (I think?) but I still wasn't ready to do this yet.
The ship feels so wrong...
OH phew I can still go and do whatever I want. Still, it feels so wrong without the crew. My people...Dr. Chakwas and Kelly and Donnelly/Daniels and that guy with the wife and baby...

Gonna do Overlord now!
I'm bringing Jack and Tali cause together we're the Fuck Cerberus crew
You know, everyone's antsy about AI, but we've had a number of rogue VIs too, haven't we? Maybe we should stop??
Yeah just blow up the satellite while we're inside it! Good idea!
You did that to your own brother? You fuck
Once again, Cerberus takes science to extreme and idiotic lengths and gets people killed. Nice going guys. Goddamn idiots
They basically made Ultron
Violet is so tired of cleaning up other people's stupid messes. But she's a good girl and she does it anyway.
Omg I have to pilot this thing...this is gonna be worse than the Mako
Tali is like "omg I can't believe I have to put up with Shepard's driving again"
Okay actually she's just tired of cleaning up Cerberus' messes. She hates working for them in general. (Have I mentioned that?)
What is this, frogger??
This is all getting a little tedious...
Man, his brother's autistic? And Archer used that like a tool?? That's fucked...that's so fucked.
The AI is herding us...
Archer wins worst brother ever award.
That elevator ride was like some tower of terror level shit. Damn.
FUCK what just happened to my girl!!!
Archer: he's literally a human computer!
HE'S LITERALLY A HUMAN!!! AND YOUR BROTHER!!! HOW COULD YOU PUT HIM IN SUCH DANGER YOU FUCK UP!!!
JESUS FUCKING CHRIST LOOK AT HIM!!!! THAT LOOKS LIKE FUCKING TORTURE HOW COULD YOU!!!!!!!!
This is fucking disgusting. Archer is a piece of human garbage. Cerberus is the worst goddamn scum.
Fuck all of you. I'm taking him somewhere safe.
"Blah blah setback" go fuck yourself illusive man.
Well, Violet and I are thoroughly disgusted now. As if we needed more reason to hate Cerberus.



You know...I only have a few random little side quests yet. None of which seem particularly influential or important. And I'm saving LotSB and Arrival for after the end. So...I think it's time to go get my crew back. I think it's time to start the end!
Here we go...
GAH she's looking at the picture of Kaidan on her desk and I'm dyin
Shut up Illusive man no one likes you
Come on upgrades, you'd better hold up!
Shit, who do I take...
I don't know if I'll get a chance to switch up for new squad mates further in. So...
I mean. Gotta be Garrus and Tali, right?
Feels so good to hear my upgrades are helping :')

"Which tech expert do we send into the ventilation shaft?" Translation: who do I care about the least?
In you go, Legion
And let's have Jacob lead the other squad, yeah?
Good work friends!
IS MY CREW IN HERE
HOLY SHIT WHAT JUST HAPPENED TO KELLY... Nooooooooo!!!!!!! 😩😩😩
AT LEAST DR CHAKWAS IS OKAY...THATS THE MOST IMPORTANT TBH
Where are my engineering pals!!!
Shepard: Nobody gets left behind.
Me: -whispers- or forgotten...
Oh god they're gone.....
That is...so horrifying...holy shit
My engineering pals :(((((((((((
Hey my doctor friend don't guilt me like that! Violet lives with so much guilt as it is, you don't need to add to it!
Would they have lived if I came here right away after they were taken...? :(

Let's see, who's the more powerful biotic...Samara or Jack? I guess Samara has more experience...let's go with her.
And let's let Thane lead this time. Man this is nerve wracking.
And okay, Jacob can escort the crew back to the ship. We good?
Gee this would be a lot easier if there was ammo around to reload with!!!!!
Oh goody, husks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thane my man, hold on...
Samara you can do it....
Gosh I'm so stressed!!!
THANE NOOOOOOOOO............FUCK
IM SORRY THANE...SHIT FUCK
He's gone...fuck me I fucked up............
I'm so upset.............
I should've had someone else lead...or gone faster? I don't know but I really didn't intend on losing Thane...........
Fuck me. Just. Fuck.

WHY IS THERE NEVER ENOUGH AMMO
A human reaper! Wow!! That looks so fun and awesome!!!! Nice work collectors!!!!!!THIS ISNT HORRIFYING AT ALL!!!!!!!!!!

GO!!!! FUCK!!! YOURSELF!!! ILLUSIVE MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO FUCKING WAY AM I NOT DESTROYING THIS BASE
OH GOODY OF COURSE THE REAPER ACTIVATES
AND I STILL HAVE NO GODDAMN AMMO

ARE MY PEOPLE OKAY
ATTABOY JOKER!!!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

HEY ILLUSIVE MAN!!!! GO CHOKE ON A BIG FUCKING DICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-XOXO VIOLET

YEAH YEAH THATS MY GIRL YEAHHHHH

IM SORRY THANE IM SO SORRY

BUT EVERYONE ELSE GOT OUT...WE DID IT...FUCK

At least if someone had to die, it was the guy who was already dying? :(

Gosh, it's over...

Well, kind of.

Going around the ship now and getting some reactions. No one actually wants to talk though.
Oh my god I just went into the crew quarters and fucking Patel ripped my heart out about the guy with the baby!!! I'm sorry I let him die!!! I didn't know it was time sensitive I'm sorry!!!!! 😩😩😩😩
Wow, I'm surprised Miranda agreed with taking down the base
OH MY GOD IT'S WORSE THAN I THOUGHT
DONNELLY SURVIVED BUT DANIELS DIDNT ....NOOOOOOOO THIS IS BREAKING MY HEART




Alright so. I have a save file from RIGHT before the kidnapping. If I go back and redo the endgame from that point, I'll be able to save the whole crew plus Thane. The only setback is I'll also have to redo Overlord afterwards. Which is a bummer but...it's worth it for a more ideal outcome, right? That's what Violet would think, anyway. :') And I gotta make my girl proud.

I did it, and I saved Thane and my whole crew and it feels soooooo good :'))) Kelly thanked me profusely and I'm just like GOSH
Things that won't feel good: doing overlord all over again. Ah well, that's the price of victory huh?
I feel like I totally cheated but I don't even care, I just wanted a good import to ME3...
Going around the ship and hearing all the crew thanking me makes it all worthwhile!

And overlord is redone! That was a lot quicker and easier the second time around.

Time for Lair of the Shadow Broker!!
Liara saved Shep from the collectors after she died...
Yo stop trying to kill my friend!!!!!!!
I don't trust this detective...
Welp
Another corrupt Spectre...
This is cool! I feel like I'm in a crime show
COMPLETE WITH A HIGH SPEED CAR CHASE!
Oh my god Shep is so fed up with Liara's backseat driving, this is HILARIOUS
Okay now she's holding an innocent woman hostage and it's NOT SO HILARIOUS...especially because she's talking about her son and now Violet is thinking of her own dead mom.........
Am I gonna find out this lady IS the shadow broker?
Oh guess not
Wait what did she just say about my unit on Akuze as she was dying?? How does that relate to working for Cerberus??????
????????????????
Damn, Liara has gotten so cold...
Pulling out all the paragon actions to get her to slow her roll and give a damn about the people around her...damnit Liara, come on
Okay this whole "navigating the entire outside of the ship" process is reeeeally getting a little too long
This whole mission is just Shep being really impatient with everything, it's amazing
OH MY GOD
Shep: remember the old days when you could just slap omni-gel on anything?
Liara: that upgrade sure made a lot of people unhappy!
I'm dying
Liara: their attacks are disorganized! They'd be more effective if they all attacked at once!
Shep: please don't give the mercs ideas...
So much lampshade hanging...this DLC is freaking hilarious
I do wish there was at least SOME dialogue written for whoever your other squad mate is. Tali is just silently chillin in the background
What the fuck are you
Violet just made the most disgusted face and I am LAUGHING
Oh he's a big boy...well shit, let's fucking go!!!!
SHE JUST PUNCHES HIM IM LAUGHING
Shit...tell me Liara's gonna become the new fuckin shadow broker
YOOOO
Aww Liara................
Yeah, that made me care about her a little more definitely
But I'm worried about her, too

Wait, now there's so much fun info to read...time to snoop on all my squad mates' personal data!
Miranda was using a dating service...oh my god
Her talk with her sister is so cute :')
Ohhhhhh she's sterile...oh gosh...:(
Mordin's production history.........
Jacob watches Old Yeller while he works out, my god
Jacqueline Nought! Huh...
...She writes poetry...
I bet she would listen to evanescence
It's okay Jack, I think your poem is baller
OH NO SHE HAD A MOM WHO LOVED HER...god this is awful...
Legion...is a gamer.........
And sucks at dating sims
This is amazing
Oh man, Garrus' sister has no idea how much of a hero he is...and his mom is sick :(
Oh but he helped her anyway! Gosh!! :')
And neither of them will know...
Samara's other daughters :(
Tali, what are you doing with your suit................
Kasumi and Jack should hold a poetry night on the Normandy
Oh my god Kasumi likes JACOB
Dr. Chakwas trying to help Thane :(
Grunt likes dinosaurs...and sharks

So I invited Liara to the Normandy because she wanted friendship, and got a cut scene that has waaaaaay more romantic implication than I ever wanted or asked for. Yeesh. She's more of a ninjamancer than Leliana ever was! Come on Bioware, say it with me. FRIENDSHIP. THAT'S ALL.

And finally it's time for Arrival!
Okay so I got the good doctor and we got out...there's gotta be more to it than this
Mmmm you wanna kill 300,000 batarians to do this :/
Two days till the reapers come? Really? I don't know if I believe that...
Aaaaaand Kenson is indoctrinated. Of course she is, leaving that giant-ass thing out in the open like that to get in everyone's heads. Fuckin dumbasses.
Now Violet has to kill a bunch of innocent brainwashed humans. That sucks.
Well shit this is impossible--surrounded and with no backup. No way I'm gonna--
Oh. It's like one of those things where you're supposed to lose
Man, this must be so hard on her
Like these are good people who were trying to save the galaxy and she has to kill them all
Bye Benson
Poor admiral Hackett, sorry I couldn't save your friend :(
GOTTA GET OUT
Oh come on, now they're just shooting at me to spite me! What do you gain by keeping me from leaving!! Too indoctrinated to even want to save yourselves...
Guard: no, that was the last shuttle! They left without us!
MAYBE YOU SHOULDVE GOTTEN ON IT INSTEAD OF SHOOTING AT ME FOR NO GOOD REASON ASSHOLES
Harbinger...
YEAH YOU TELL HIM GIRL
I'm sorry, batarians :(
Things my autocorrect has tried to change that word to: barbarians, Bavarians
Hey Hackett! Sorry again...
He has so much faith in her :') he's a good dude.
Violet said she's willing to turn herself in. I guess this is leading in to ME3 now huh...I'm almost scared to see how it's gonna start..........

And that's it, huh? I'm done with Mass Effect 2. What a ride.