Shermanon's Surprise

> she was asleep
> she always slept during the day, leaving him to watch for whatever horrid monsters Tartarus would spawn
> he was lonely
> he was always lonely
> they only rarely ever had a meaningful  conversation, and even then, perhaps only a few exchanges of question and answer
> by this point he didn't care
> all that mattered was that he was hungry
> starved, as a matter of fact
> it had been weeks, months, or maybe even years since he entered Tartarus
> one loses track of time when hell decides the schedule
>  ever rock formation looked like food
> the spires looked like french fries
> the dunes look like ice cream scoops
> he shook his head violently, and gave himself a weak slap
Gotta stay focused, Darkie's counting on me
> he scanned the horizon diligently, like a good watchman
> as he scanned, his eyes came upon a bizarre sight
> a hamburger
> his eyes grew wide, and his mouth watered
Gotta be careful. Tartarus has tried this on me before
> but he could not shake interest
> he crept slowly towards the burger, expecting a monster to appear at any moment
> much to his surprise, he managed to stand next to the burger, without a giant crab to be found
> he dropped to his knees and eyed the sandwich
> nothing appeared out of the ordinary
> he prodded the bun, it felt firm and plush
> still no Tartarus trickery
> after a mental debate, he decided to test for a trap once more
> he slowly and gingerly rubbed his tongue on the patty
> Tartarus played no trick
> the deliciously savory flavor of the meat entranced him
> he went in for another lick, the flavor only intensifying
> his tongue lathered the patty, each lick making the delicious meat more moist and delectable
> the burger let out a low moan
> in his fury to lick the burger to death, he didn't hear the moan
> in her sleep, Nightmare Moon was having a wonderful dream
> She dreamt of the death of the Princesses, her hoof crushing the skull of the Light bringing Celestia
> the dream began to take a turn that she hadn't experienced in centuries
> as she went to claim her throne, a unicorn approached her
> wowed by her power and ferocity, she begged that she might please Mistress Moon
> Nightmare Moon consented, and the horn of the unicorn sank into her
> Anonymous was violently licking the patty, going so far as to force his tongue into the meat
> the burger moaned more and more, louder and louder, but he didn't care, this meat was scrumptious
> suddenly, the meat began to get firmer which only served to make him savor its juices more
> the burger screamed, and his tongue was flooded with delicious beef juices
> he couldn't take it anymore
> he bit down onto the burger
> finally, his hunger would be over
> the burger let out a cry of pain, and jolted upward
> the jolt sent him tumbling backwards
> he cleared his eyes of sand
> Nightmare Moon was hovering over him, eyes glowing with flaming dark hatred
> he saw the glimmer of a clear liquid dripping behind her
> a large rock off in the distance rushed to meet him
> the sharp jolt of pain was the last sensation he felt before everything went dark