Ghostbuster ssa file

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He's gonna take you back to the past

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To play the shitty games that suck ass

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He'd rather have a buffallo

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Take a diarrhea dump in his ear

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He'd rather eat the rotten asshole

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Of a road killed skunk and down it with beer

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He's the angriest gamer you've ever heard

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He's the Angry Nintendo Nerd

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He's the Angry Atari Sega Nerd

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He's the Angry Video Game Nerd

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 Ghostbusters

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 It was one of the most successful comedy in the 80's.

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 It's one of the most popular franchies when I remembered as a kid.

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  There's a sequel, a cartoon series that ran for 7 seasons,

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 huge amount of merchandise, and a line of action figures

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 you got firehouse, which is awesome.

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 You got the Ecto-1, You got slimer, The marchmallow man

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 Yea he's a little dirty man, the dog shoved it up his ass

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 You have all the ghostbusters

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 They came out with version that made facial expression

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 You have this car that turns into a some praying mantis or something.

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 You have all these weird one that I don't even remember from the show

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 This one I don't think it-

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 That's not mine, get that the fuck out of there

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 Every kids on the block needs a proton pack

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And even though it's plastic, in our minds, it's an unlicensed nuclear accelerator.

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You have the ghost trap which doesn't work anymore because it's a piece of shit.

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PK meter always shows .03 and always show a ghost

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So, I wanted to take you back to the 80's

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When Ghostbusters and nintendo were the best thing in the world.

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Now NES I believe needs no introduction

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So when we heard that Ghostbuster game for Nintendo was coming out

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We were so excited, we shit in our pants

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Literately shit came out of our asses, I mean rocketing through the roof.

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It was two favorite things coming together.

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Should have been bread and butter

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More like dead stunk and dog shit.

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You pop this piece of crap in expecting Ghostbuster and what do you get?

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Well... Ghostbuster, you got the logo there. Looks promising enough

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Are you willing to bet that it going to get really bad when you start playing?

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Yeah.  Guess what...

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It gets bad as soon as you press the start button.

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[Horribly 8-bit sound clip saying Ghostbuster plays]

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What the fuck was that?!

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[Ghoshbussteer]

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Goashbuuusstter...

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[GooassstBbbooosstter..?!]

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Now don't get me wrong

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I'm not criticise the game for a lack of voice clarity

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Did you hear how bad that sound?

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Let this set the tone for the rest of the game.

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Here's the main screen

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This is it, this is Ghostbuster on the Nintendo.

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This is my wasted childhood you're looking at.

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I don't even need to comment

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I mean just look at it, it's shit for the bird

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Okay we gotta come up with the game about Ghostbuster, what can we do?

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How about have a Ghostbuster logo floating around playing tag with cute little yellow ghost.

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If you like Ghostbuster, it's right up your alley.

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More like up your ass.

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Now for music, you got the Ghostbuster theme song.

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It sounds like a decent 8-bit rendition

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But there's one problem

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It's the only song in the whole game and it never ever stops.

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It starts playing at the first screen all the way to the end of the game.

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It drones over you and it makes your brain go numb

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and when it gets to the end of the song

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it pauses for a second, then it loops again

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You better get use to it

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But let me tell you when that one second when the music stops.

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It feels so satisfying to hear dead silence even for one brief moment to put your mind at peace.

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So, seriously what am I doing?  Why am I a Ghostbuster logo playing tag with ghosts.

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From what I understand, the more ghost that goes into the Zuul building in the center, the more the PK energy goes up I guess.

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What happens when it goes up all the way?  I don't know.

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Some stay puff Marshmallow man appears some shit like that.

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But I'm not here to fiqure out how the game works.

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I'm here to retell my experience of the game.

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Now what am I trying to do?

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Why does this white box keeps appearing when I press the B button?

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Well I'll explain later.

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So here's what you're suppose to do, you need to find which building has ghost in it.

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They vary any point of the game.

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You need to go around the city and when you touch certain building, it blinks red.

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That means there's ghost in there

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You try to enter and- opps, you can't do that yet.

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You need buy your own proton packs and ghost traps.

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Ghostbusters don't have there own equipments and they have to go buy it from a store.

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So this is it, this is the Ghostbuster store.

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When or where there's a store that sell equipment for catching ghost?

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If the Ghostbusters aren't inventing there own gadget, then who the hell is?

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Anyway, buy your shit and get out.

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Now we can see what that wierd white box that shows what equipment that you have.

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You can hold up to 4 items at a time.

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Go find a blinking red building and go in.

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Now you're in the Ecto-1 driving down the road.

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Why do you still have to drive to the building is beyond me?

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On the map screen, it looks like you're right there.

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You move all around, you don't have to drive.

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Only when you're at the building that you need to drive there.

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Every other cars in the city is out to hit you.

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They move back and forth, nobody stays in their lanes

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Seems like the city actually has a bigger problem with drunk drivers than it does with ghost.

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Oh guess what, when the cars hit you,

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Who have to pay for the damage?

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You do.  That's right, every car that hits you take a few hundred dollars away.  Bullshit.

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You get the building to capture the ghost.

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Drop the trap, catch the ghost with your beams.

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open the trap and time it with the ghost dragged in with that white thing that goes up and down.

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Keep going around finding building to go in...

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Avoid drunk'n drivers...

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and catch more ghosts.

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When you catch ghost, you get money.

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you're going to need it when you need to buy stupid shit later

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There's a time limit so when you catch any ghost,

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Your goal is to catch as many of them as you can0

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Most of the time, you'll probably be able to get all four of them.

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Sometimes, it goes somewhere where you can't reach without buying a longer beam.

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Good luck catching enough of them to be able to afford a longer beam.

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But, sometimes they go to low and you can't reach them there either.

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Now whatever you do, don't cross the stream

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It's an important safety tip thanks to Egon from the movie.

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It'd cause total protonic reversial.

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Try to imagine all life as you know,

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 stopping instantly every molocules in your body, exploding at the speed of life.

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Now that's epic.

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Now every time you catch a ghost, you can't reuse the same trap.

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When you try to enter the building,

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you might get a message that said, You need an empty ghost trap.

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You need to go to the ghostbuster headquarter to empty the traps.

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When you get there, you may be baffled to see that the size of the car is the same size as the building.

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You constantly running around, emptying traps...

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You keep running out of gas.

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That's right!  You can run out of gas in this game!

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How do you get gas?  You have to go to the gas station

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What happens when you run out of gas?

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The two little fuck balls get out and push the car.

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Do you have to go to the gas station at all?

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No, you also can slam into gas tanks on the highway.

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Fuck the gas station, I wish it was this easy in real life.

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Need gas?, just run over the gas container.

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So because you needing to get gas, needing to empty ghost traps, needing to buy stupid shit are all such a big part of the game.

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It would be wise in the beginning to buy the super trap as one of your first item

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This trap you don't have to empty

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The regular trap is a piece of crap!

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Another thing you may want to buy is ghost vacuum.

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It's a vacuum that goes to the top of your car to sucks ghost is a good idea to build extra money hope to make up of the damages that the drunk drivers have cause.

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A ghost vacuum

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Is there an existance of a store that sell a ghost vacuum?

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lets fine out...

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hi do you sell vacuums?

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Clerk:um yes

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Um yea, I'm looking for a special kind of vacuum, it's like shaped as a funnel sorta.

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Clerk:what kind of vacuum?

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It's shaped as a funnel that you put on the roof of your car.

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Clerk:You want a vacuum to clean your car?

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No no...You put it on top of your car...

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like while you're driving?

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Clerk:You want a vacuum to clean--

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No, these vacuums are for catching ghosts.

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Well apparently these vaccums don't exist in real life.

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So if you want to suck up ghost from the roof of your car,

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you have to do it in this game.

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I really hate these driving stage.

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Naturally you want to speed up to get them over with.

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When you speed up, your car goes to the top of the screen.

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you can't see what coming at you whether be ghost that you're trying to catch, gas barrels or drunk drivers

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FUCK!!! ASSHOLES!!

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You must be wondering, is this all you do in the game? Going to building to building catching ghosts and dodging cars.

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Well... yes.

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This is all you do.

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I am dead fucking serious!

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The main idea is to go into the Zuul building

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But you can't do that until the game said you can.

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How does it decide that? I don't have a fuckin' clue.

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Maybe it has to do how many ghost that you need to catch

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or the PK energy get to a certain number so it probably means to letting the ghost go in

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So, I don't know

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For whatever reason, you're not allowed to go into the Zuul building right away.

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Maybe there's invisible barrier that take like a fucking an hour to go away

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Also, why is it called the Zuul building?

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If it meant to be named after the main villian from the movie, it should be Gozer.

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Gozer has 2 minions.

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the Keymaster is also known as Vinz Clortho.

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Gatekeeper is also known as Zuul.

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So, why is the main building in the game named after Zuul?

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Who knows...

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So anyway, it takes forever to be allowed to enter the building.

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In the meantime, you just keep on catching ghost.

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after doing this for long

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you start to wonder.

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Who pays you to catch ghost anyway?

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Why are the ghost so generically cute looking?

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They don't do anything to you.

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Why are you busting them?

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Busting them make you feel good?

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Don't the ghost have a right to death?

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Obviously I'm thinking to deep about it,

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That's what happens...

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That's what happen when you play such a boring ass shitty game.

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Your mind get delirious

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See right now, I feel like I'm going fucking crazy!

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So finally you get a message to enter the Zuul building

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But it's on the very bottom of the screen!

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You need to be paying attention.

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Seriously, half the time, I really don't notice it because I am not looking down there.

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A little sound cue would of helped, you fuckers.

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Now you get into the building,

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It a breath of fresh air to see something different.

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Unlike the rest of the ghost in the game, these one harm you.

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In order to move through the stage, you have to keep tapping the A button as fast as you can.

211
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Why can't you use the control pad?

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Now you move so slow, ghost aren't possible to dodge.

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And constantly going up the stairs doesn't help either.

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You're basically defenseless.

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You can't get away when you're on the stairs.

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When the ghost touch you, you fall.

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When the ghost touch you three times, you're dead!

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The game's over. If you want to try again, you gotta start over all over from the beginning.

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Now let me ask you this, why can't the ghost buster use there proton beam here?

220
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Well, let me answer my own question.

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That would make the game resemble a decent side-scroller shooter.

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Problem there, that would make the game kinda good.

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Apparently, that what aren't they going for.

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So playing through the game for the second time to get another shot to get to the damn stairway.

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It would be wise to invest in some items to help you out.

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Anti-ghost suit that supposely would give you an extra 2 hit from the ghosts

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Then there is this ghost bait.

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Now what kind of food would ghost eat?

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Then there is a sound generater which I think slows the ghosts down.

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But forget about it, it's too fuck'n expensive.

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So anyway, now you know why these a lot of these items are so important.

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You need every bit of help that you can get.

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You will never have enough money to buy everything in the game.

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ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU KEEP GETTING HIT BY DRUNKS!

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FUCK!!! I'm out of GAS!

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It really sucks to keep refueling this car.

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It sucks even harder when the gas cost money too!

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It cost more money than it does in real life.

239
00:12:32,010 --> 00:12:34,000
You need to keep catching ghost for money.

240
00:12:34,010 --> 00:12:37,000
To spend money on gas that you need to catch more ghost.

241
00:12:37,010 --> 00:12:40,000
It keeps on going, it's an endless cycle.

242
00:12:40,010 --> 00:12:44,000
Eventually, you'll see the enter Zuul building message again.

243
00:12:44,010 --> 00:12:49,000
Sometimes you're not fucking ready, because there are equipments that you need to buy in order to get to up the stairs.

244
00:12:49,010 --> 00:12:52,000
The offer to enter is only good for a short period of time.

245
00:12:52,010 --> 00:12:59,900
By about the time you catch more ghosts, make enough money, and buy the gear that you want, it's too late to enter the building.

246
00:13:00,010 --> 00:13:05,000
The only way to get that offer again is to go catch more ghost and wait another hour, however long it takes.

247
00:13:05,010 --> 00:13:12,000
The only sure way to be able go in the building the first time is to trade your traps, ghost vaccum and other equipments you don't need for the stairswell stage.

248
00:13:12,010 --> 00:13:14,000
You can only hold 4 items at a time anyway.

249
00:13:14,010 --> 00:13:17,000
You actually need to trade something in.

250
00:13:17,010 --> 00:13:23,500
But by the time you get the message, drive to the store, trade your shit it, buy the stuff you needed, and come back to the Zuul building.

251
00:13:23,510 --> 00:13:25,000
You're too fuck'n LATE!!!

252
00:13:25,010 --> 00:13:26,500
So what you gotta do now!?

253
00:13:26,510 --> 00:13:28,000
You got to CATCH more FUCKING GHOSTS!!

254
00:13:28,010 --> 00:13:32,000
So you got to go back to the store again trade your regular stuff back

255
00:13:32,010 --> 00:13:35,000
and FUCK, I HATE THIS FUCKING GAME!!!

256
00:13:35,010 --> 00:13:37,000
WHAT WERE THEY THINKING!?

257
00:13:37,010 --> 00:13:42,000
Well, let's try to get through the stairwell and hopefully see the end of the game.

258
00:13:42,010 --> 00:13:47,000
I think one of the problem is my thumb get tired pressing the button.

259
00:13:47,010 --> 00:13:50,000
The hell with that controller. We're going turbo.

260
00:13:51,010 --> 00:13:53,000
Drop the damn food.

261
00:13:54,010 --> 00:13:57,000
Get the fucking food. Get out of my way.

262
00:13:59,010 --> 00:14:02,000
Out of my way bitches

263
00:14:03,010 --> 00:14:05,000
The ghost bait doesn't do shit.

264
00:14:05,010 --> 00:14:07,000
Even if you out run the ghosts, They never leave the screen.

265
00:14:07,010 --> 00:14:10,000
As soon as you go up the stairs. They scroll up with you.

266
00:14:10,010 --> 00:14:14,000
as soon as the ghost bait goes off screen, the ghosts start chasing you again.

267
00:14:14,010 --> 00:14:19,000
What the point of dropping the ghost bait if you're not allowed to go up the stairs to get away.

268
00:14:19,010 --> 00:14:22,000
What am I gonna do? Drop the bait and stand there?

269
00:14:22,010 --> 00:14:23,500
Why would I do that?

270
00:14:24,010 --> 00:14:26,000
Oh my god!  Now they are right in the way!

271
00:14:26,010 --> 00:14:28,000
How am I going to get up there?

272
00:14:29,010 --> 00:14:31,000
comeon A... A....  very good...

273
00:14:31,010 --> 00:14:33,000
Oh A... A... Ahh... there you go.

274
00:14:33,010 --> 00:14:35,000
UH A.. Oooo... right between there.

275
00:14:35,010 --> 00:14:37,000
Oh man uh oh...

276
00:14:37,010 --> 00:14:38,000
ohmigod!!

277
00:14:38,010 --> 00:14:40,000
UUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH...

278
00:14:41,010 --> 00:14:42,000
Fuck fuck!!!

279
00:14:43,010 --> 00:14:46,000
Oh please Game Genie, grant me 3 wishes.

280
00:14:46,010 --> 00:14:48,000
That's right, we're going to cheat.

281
00:14:48,010 --> 00:14:52,000
There's one cheat that I care about. Immunity from the ghost on the stairwell.

282
00:14:52,010 --> 00:14:58,000
At least now I can't get killed by the ghost, but it means it take all fuck'n day to get up the fucking stairs.

283
00:14:58,010 --> 00:14:59,500
It keeps going.

284
00:15:00,010 --> 00:15:03,000
Even if you did it with the control pad, it would be cheating.

285
00:15:03,010 --> 00:15:06,000
The fact that you're suppose to tap the button the whole time and dodge ghosts.

286
00:15:06,010 --> 00:15:11,000
...enough counted, there are 22 floors.  Do you think that is enough?

287
00:15:11,010 --> 00:15:13,000
What were the fuck were the fuckers thinking!?!?

288
00:15:13,010 --> 00:15:15,000
This is the worst game that I played in my life.

289
00:15:15,010 --> 00:15:18,000
It's worse than Dr.Jekyll and Mr.Hyde.

290
00:15:18,010 --> 00:15:20,000
Well maybe it wasn't that bad

291
00:15:21,010 --> 00:15:22,000
And then they run?

292
00:15:22,010 --> 00:15:25,000
They move like slug the whole fucking time...

293
00:15:25,010 --> 00:15:29,000
As soon as they reach the top, they run like they have propellers in there asses.

294
00:15:30,010 --> 00:15:34,000
Well here's the last screen of the game and it looks like shit.

295
00:15:34,010 --> 00:15:39,000
The whole layout design like a grid flat gray floor there's no background, it's all black.

296
00:15:39,010 --> 00:15:44,000
The little ghost with the tounge sticking out look like ghost from a kindergarden halloween decoration.

297
00:15:44,010 --> 00:15:46,000
Neither Gozer and the dogs moves.

298
00:15:46,010 --> 00:15:50,000
I can even name the dogs, that's Vins Clortho and Zuul.

299
00:15:50,010 --> 00:15:52,000
Zuul appearencely brought the building as he is standing there.

300
00:15:53,510 --> 00:15:56,000
Now you know what really shocking about this part?

301
00:15:56,010 --> 00:15:59,990
Moving around, dodging projectiles and shooting at things...

302
00:16:00,010 --> 00:16:03,000
kinda like a game.

303
00:16:03,010 --> 00:16:04,000
Surprising right?

304
00:16:04,010 --> 00:16:10,000
This is the closest moment that this piece of shit ever come possibly be decent.

305
00:16:10,010 --> 00:16:16,000
You know what's really annoying? Anytime you go anywhere near the bottom of the screen, this happens...

306
00:16:16,010 --> 00:16:19,000
Say hello to Mr.Staypuff climbing up the building.

307
00:16:19,010 --> 00:16:24,000
I don't know what the point is, Everytime I accidently go down there, Staypuff is higher up the building.

308
00:16:24,010 --> 00:16:27,000
I can guess when he reaches the top, that can't be good.

309
00:16:27,010 --> 00:16:31,000
So, let's show this prehistoric bitch how we do things downtown.

310
00:16:32,010 --> 00:16:34,000
... oh now you gonna get it now...

311
00:16:34,010 --> 00:16:37,000
...herewego...yea......

312
00:16:37,010 --> 00:16:40,000
ugh... take it you fucking bitch!!!

313
00:16:40,010 --> 00:16:43,000
This chick is TOAST!!!

314
00:16:46,010 --> 00:16:48,000
what the fuck...

315
00:16:50,010 --> 00:16:53,000
...

316
00:16:55,010 --> 00:16:57,000
what?

317
00:17:00,010 --> 00:17:04,000
OOoowhat?

318
00:17:03,010 --> 00:17:09,090
*sobs*

319
00:17:00,010 --> 00:17:12,000
[ghostbuster BG music volume increasing]