“...You have to actively reach for your happiness to get it, Catherine. You don’t have to know what it is when you first start out, but that doesn’t stop it from being there,” he continued on when she didn’t reply, stuffed his hands in his pockets. “And that’s the gospel truth. But fine. You win.”

Each word felt like a needle pricking skin and squeezed her heart until it hurt and then some, and she just stood there and took it.

“You go back to Ecruteak, and things are exactly the same as before you left. The practices are long and gruesome and you work yourself to the bone, but you at least get some joy out of the performances and public ceremonies when all eyes are on you. Your family comes and sees a performance or two once you graduate from maiko to geisha, and they adore you and love you even more than your fans and admirers while your rivals seethe with rage. You appreciate it well enough and you suppose that’s alright.”

He hummed. “You continue doing the program for a few years and, since Morty’ll be out of the picture in this regard, another man will catch your eye. He’s rich and treats you well enough and you’ll have a couple kids or so. You raise them with a fair hand but stern hand and you spend your days cleaning and cooking and make sure everyone feels alright when you come home, and you’ll never mention that empty feeling that creeps around you because it’s always been there, hasn’t it? None of your friends ever mention having this problem, and you’d only drag others down when you share your worries or doubts about this so you won’t bother.”

“One day your kids will move out and you have even more free time on your hands. You could take up a job being a translator just like your mother, but it doesn’t really pique your interest as much as sate your boredom. It’s better than nothing. The years pass and your husband loses more interest than he already has, but divorce is out of the question and you don’t have enough feeling in you to try and save this relationship, let alone try another on the side. It’s a quiet and slightly boring life and that hollow feeling still hasn’t gone away, but the summer evenings are peaceful and you are content. It’s all alright.”