astropasta1.1

It was a bright, sunny day here in Duckberg. The birds were chirping, the ducks were paddling in the water (as one might guess!!) and my stepfather, Gilligan, snapping me awake with the delicious smell of fresh pancakes and his own overwhelming mediocrity. “Mingus,” he chanted my name with his trademark pep and spunk, “get your mother and come down for some scrumptious pancakes!” I swiftly hopped out of bed with a winning smile on my face, imagining scarfing down those scrumptious discs of batter. But before I could consume those tasty boys, I had to wake up my mother first….Sighhhh… Ever since she lost her job, she’s been a real downer to be around. She’s always complaining about, “ooo the ancient curse has consumed me ooo,” like...We all have problems, toots! I walked into her room, only to once again hear her clawing at the walls and shrieking about the horrors below; drama queen, much? Upon further inspection, I noticed blood streaming down from her eyes...She must’ve been using a new makeup. With a faint sigh, I let her know that dad had made pancakes and that she should come down when she’s done making a ruckus. She started yelling about “eternal fire” and “damnation” or something, I didn’t really pay attention, and took that as my cue to book it.