SimEquestria 2000

>Day 529 in Equestria.
>Day 7 filling in for Mayor Mare while she's away in Canterlot.
>Being Deputy Mayor is an easy job.
>Approve increase to educational budget for Cheerilee.
>Construct more water pumps around the reservoir.
>Designate the areas around Fluttershy's cottage zoned for Heavy Industrial construction.
>Applejack comes by looking for a grant to further develop more farmland.
>Nope.
"YA CAN'T CUT BACK ON FUNDING! Y'ALL WILL REGRET THIS!"
>Click the Tornado button until all of Sweet Apple Acres is leveled to the ground.
>Such is life in SimEquestria.

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>Day 8 in SimEquestria.
>Griffin neighbors to the north want a road built connecting our two lands.
>Cost 10 bits per roadway tile + 1000 bits to bridge connection.
"Hmmmmmm, I don't know..."
>It comes with a free sign.
"HELL FUCKIN YES! LET'S DO THIS!"
>Construction goes smoothly and soon you have both a new route of commerce and a cool new sign.
>And that cool new sign reads: Gryphonia 1
>Nope.
>Bulldoze that sign and have a better one constructed.
WELCOME TO PECKERVILLE
>Now that's a sign to be proud of.

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>Day 10 in SimEquestria.
>Speak with Twilight Sparkle concerning educational needs of the city.
"Our young colts and fillies could stand to read more, we need more libraries."
>This seems like an easy enough fix.
>Bulldoze the schoolhouse, hospital and fire station.
>Erect libraries where they each stood.
"No no, Anon! The town can't function without those buildings."
>Fine.
>Tear down all the new libraries and rebuild the school, hospital and fire station.
>"Well Twilight, is that better?"
"Our young colts and fillies could stand to read more, we need more libraries."
>Women, just can't ever make up their minds.

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>Day 13 in SimEquestria.
>This town is kinda boring.
>We need a sports team.
>Actually we need two sports teams, that way they can play against each other.
>Begin construction on a new Hoofball stadium on an open plot of land and hire enough players to fill two teams.
>Now what to name the teams?
>Fluttershy suggests naming them after some of her animal friends.
>Eh, it's as good a suggestion as any.
>A few days later the first game is played between the two teams and the residents of Ponyville love it.
>Headlines of the Foal Free Press tell the tale of the game the next morning.
COCKS POUND BEAVERS 12-4

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>Day 14 in SimEquestria.
>The days stuck in the office can get rather boring.
>Fluttershy suggests getting an office pet.
"Yeah sure, why not?"
>She brings you over an ant farm.
>The two of you sit watching the little guys dig tunnels for a while.
"You know Flutters, these little guys really aren't all that different from the rest of us."
"Running around in circles, doing busywork, just living life."
>"I never really thought about it Anon, I guess you're right."
"Hey Flutters, this was kinda fun. Thanks."
>You two watch them work for a while longer.
>Today was a pretty good day.


>Day 1 in Antquestria.
>You are Yellow Antnonymous.
>Just chilling out in your part of the ant farm.
>There's a knock at the door.
>It's Flutterant.
>"Hi Antnon."
>She's wearing a pair of wings and a crown.
>"I thought maybe you preferred younger girls, so are new queens your fetish?"
"No Flutterant, I'm not a larvae-lester, that's disgusting."
>Flutterant starts sweating and mumbling something.
>Pheromone trails fall out of her pockets.
>Fucking Flutterant.
>Then SpiderJack kicks in the door.
>"IT'S SPIDER TIME!"
"No SJ, no!"
>Such is life in SimAntquestria.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4A1VAPb0fHQ

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>Day 17 in SimEquestria.
>Just finished constructing the third police station around Zecora's hut.
>Damn zigger needs to learn that crime doesn't pay.
>There's a knock at the office door.
>It's Fluttershy.
>"Hey Anon, are Reticulating Splines your fetish?"
"Fluttershy, do you even know what Reticulating Splines are?"
>"Ummm, well... no."
>Close the door on her and go back to work.
>Looks like we might need a fourth police station near Zecora.
>Urban development is not easy.

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>Day 20 in SimEquestria.
>Ponyville has been growing by leaps and bounds ever since you bulldozed the Everfree forest and constructed dense residential and shopping malls over it.
>Now your population is high enough to attract the military.
>*The Royal Guard would like to construct a base in your city. This could mean additional revenues but could also raise additional problems.*
>*Do you allow the Royal Guard to construct a base?*
>[YES] NO
"Oh I hope we get an Earth pony and Unicorn Army base, that would pump so much money into the local econ-"
>*The Royal Guard has placed missile silos as your base.*
"FFFFFFFFUUUUUUU!!!"
>Well shit, now all that land is taken up by nuclear missiles, bombs and a few jets.
>Hang on a second, maybe some good can come of this after all...
"Hey Fluttershy! I just realized something!"
"Dr. Strangelove is my fetish!"
>This is going to be a great day after all.

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>Day 22 in SimEquestria.
>It's a slow day as Deputy Mayor.
>Seems a good a time as any to go over city ordinances and see if anything needs changing.
>Volunteer Fire Dept? Might want to cancel that, if only to put a stop to CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS: FIRE MARSHALS!
>Public Smoking Ban? Yeah let's enact that, maybe keep those dragons out of the city.
>Homeless Shelters? Sorry Scootaloo, but you're going back to sleeping in the woods.
>Nuclear Free Zone? Oooh look, it doesn't cost anything to implement. Let's do it!
>And from that day forth, Princess Celestia and her radiation causing ass were banned from the town of Ponyville.
>Still nothing to keep the Zebras out though.
>Damn.

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>Day 27 in SimEquestria.
>Finally you have a large enough population to access Arcologies.
>But which one to build?
DUH
ALL OF THEM!
>Set fire to Sweet Apple Acres to make room for them all.
>Then let AJ rebuild and replant.
>Then set fire to Sweet Apple Acres again.
>Then piss on the ashes.
>Fuck yeah.
>Now construction can begin.
>Once you have all 4 Arcologies finished it's time to populate them.
>Send all the Apple Family to the Plymouth Arcology, why the hell would they care about pollution?
>Fluttershy and her critters can go into the Forest Arcology and do whatever kind of tree hugging crap they do.
>Move the entire Changeling horde into Darco Arcology, then send in Roid Rage after them with a machete.
>And that wonderful mare Derpy Hooves can be in charge of the Launch Arcology.
>Nothing can go wrong here.
>*THE EXODUS HAS BEGUN*
>*YOUR LAUNCH ARCOS HAVE DEPARTED INTO SPACE TO FOUND NEW WORLDS. YOU HAVE BEEN COMPENSATED FOR THEIR CONSTRUCTION.*
"Derpy, what the hell did you do now?"
>"I'm sorry, I just don't know what went wrong."
"Oh you."
>Just another day in SimEquestria.