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- >Be Anon
- >Gayer than ever
- >Things are still good between us, I've even gotten to know the rest of their clique better
- >One day at school
- >Applejack invites me over to her house
- "Yeah, I guess I can manage to swing by. What do you wanna do?"
- >"Probably just hang around with all of us, maybe you can help me out with my chores too"
- "Is that your ulterior motive?"
- >"Oh come on anon, you're a fiarly strong guy"
- >See, told you I wasn't feminine
- >"Oh, and don't bring any weed with you this time. My little sister and her friends are over today."
- "Fine. Message recieved."
- >Show up to her place
- >"Howdy anon!"
- >"H-Hi"
- >etc
- >etc
- "Wassup girls?"
- >I feel something latch onto my arm
- >"You must be anonymous!"
- >It's a someone with red hair and yellow skin.
- >"That's just my little sister Applebloom" says Applejack
- "Well, it's great to meet you Applebloom."
- >"It's great to meet you too!" she responds with a massive smile on her face and the enthusiasm of someone who was just released from prison
- >"Those are her friends Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle."
- >"Hi anonymous!" they smile and wave
- >I just shrug off Applebloom's behavior as some kind of passive interest. I had a little sister, I knew how girls were. Even at a young age, they were interested in dating and trying to be like everyone else. But it never resulted in everything.
- >Applejack shows me to her living room
- >We're watching TV, 5 of them are sitting on couches or chairs, me, Pinkie, and Applejack are on the floor.
- >It's some show called Steven Universe
- >Now I don't usually watch cartoons, but this was pretty good.
- >Pinkie PIe was getting an absolute kick out of it.
- >"Hahahahaha" she laughed qutie nasally, "That fat kid is so silly!"
- >It was pretty entertaining.
- >"Applejack!" Granny Smith called upstairs "Did you get yur chores din' yet?"
- >"No granny! I'll start 'em now!" SHe turned to me and smiled. "Might need your help anon, you don't mind do you?"
- "I guess I could"
- ---
- >Now Applejack is pretty strong, and by that I mean she could probably outlift any guy at our school.
- >Even flash sentry
- >That was a joke, that kid is skinny
- >Anyway, we had to feed the chickens, shovel the hay, and feed the pigs.
- >In other words, I had to lift two 25 lb. bags of chicken feed, move these massive piles of hay with my own two arms, and carry huge tubs of liquid crap about a quarter of a mile.
- >I was about to pass out
- >Applejack, however, had barely broken a sweat.
- "Man AJ.... how do you do it?"
- >"Aww come on Anon, don't tell me you're tired already! I've been doing this kind of work since I was little!"
- >I'm being emasculated by a farm girl
- >Great
- >I feel a tug on my shirt sleeve
- >It was Applebloom
- >"Hey Anon! I brought you and Applejack some lemonade!
- "Oh thanks Applebloom."
- >I took the glass
- >Notbad/10
- "This is pretty good!"
- >"Th-thanks Anon". She blushes a little and looks off to the side. "You've been working really hard, you know, it must be pretty tough."
- "Yeah it is. I really appreciate it."
- >She hands Applejack her glass and dashes off somewhere back into the house
- "You're sister is sweet"
- >"I think she's taken quite a likin' to you Anon" Applejack smiles and says playfully
- "Yeah, I suspected as much. It's swet isn't it. Pretty ironic too."
- >"The irony isn't lost on me, believe me"
- "Are we done yet?"
- >"Almost. We just got harvest a few apples first. Follow me"
- >We make our way down to the nearest orchard.
- >And that's when I saw him
- >Big Macintosh
- >You remember when I said I was pretty masculine, well, for the most part anyway... this dude was like.... woah. That's all I could think.
- >"Anon, this is Big Macintosh, Bic Mac, this is anon."
- >He grips my hand
- >Hard
- >"Pleasure to meet you, Anon!"
- "The pleasure is all mine"
- >Geroge Takei: OH MY!
- >How lewd.
- ---
- >We proceed to harvest the apples.
- >They go about it by swing sledgehammers afainst the trees to knock them down. My job is to pick them up off the ground.
- >These two are just swing these things like twigs
- >One hit and the apples fall to the ground
- >Now the backet is getting heavier, at least 50 lbs. now.
- >I'm struggling to carry it.
- >But we're not even done yet.
- >By the time we're done, it's like 125 lbs.
- "Umm, Applejack... I don't think this basket is going anywhere...."
- >Big Mac scoops up the other handle in his hands and nods at me.
- >Between the two of us it's still pretty hard, well for me anyways, but at least now the basket is moving
- >We load it onto the cart
- >Applejack and Big Mac pull the cart back to the barn.
- >I spend a good 3 minutes just staring at Big Mac, admirin' his.... physique
- >I'm snapped awake by Applejack
- >"Anon, are you alright?"
- >It's all good, I know how to play things off, I've done it before
- "Just really tired is all"
- >"You look dazed, I think the heat is getting to you, let's get you inside"
- >The living room is now empty
- >I don't know where everyone else went but at this point I don't care.
- >I just lay with my head propped against the back of the couch when I hear a familiar voice chime in.
- >"Hey Anon!"
- >It's Applebloom again
- >"Is it okay if I call you Anon?"
- "Yeah, that's fine"
- >"Good, I didn't want to be rude or anything. I just wanted to see if you were doing alright. You've been working so hard. I saw you out of my bed room window, working your..... strong muscles." She said with a smirk.
- "I'm not that strong, actually, your sister is much stronger than me."
- >"Yeah, but you may actually give her a run for her money"
- >No one has ever thought I was this manly.
- >This has reached new levels of irony.
- ---
- >All of a sudden she puts her hand on my thigh
- >Oh shit what are you doing
- >Applejack suddenly comes in with some water on a tray.
- >"Here anon, I brought you some.... Applebloom! What are you doing? Leave Anon alone. Go on, git!"
- >She scurries away down the hall.
- >"I hope she didn't bother ya too much Anon."
- "It's fine, she's just trying to be friendly."
- >"Yeah, but she's getting kinda clingy"
- "Yeah, I think you're right, we may need to give her some breathing room for a little while. Wanna go to the mall or something? We can invite the rest of the girls."
- >"That sounds like a great idea! I'll call them up now and let them know."
- >Well alrighty then
- >45 minutes later Rarity shows up with her car
- >"Get in you two!"
- >We head off to the mall.
- >After letting the girls browse around a little I head into Pacsun
- >I'm looking at the T-shirts when all of a sudden
- >"HI ANON!"
- >Awww snap
- >A wild Applebloom appeared!
- >What do you want to do?
- >FIGHT
- >BAG
- >PKMN
- >RUN
- >I would run, but she would just follow me.
- "Applebloom, what the crap are you doing here?!"
- >"We decided to follow you guys tho the mall!"
- >We?
- >Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo emerge out from inside a clothing rack.
- >"Hi anon" sweetie belle says
- >"It was Applebloom's idea to spy on you guys by the way" adds Scootaloo
- "Does Applejack know you guys are here?"
- >"N-no. My brother dropped me off."
- >B-big Macintosh? Was he here now?
- "Is he still here?"
- >"No, he just dropped us off"
- "Well, we better get you back to you sister"
- >I grab her by the hand
- >"Gasp, Anon, y-you're h-holding my hand!"
- >I rolled my eyes
- "Come on you two." I called out to her two friends
- >They followed us back to the upper level where Applejack and her friends where
- >"Applebloom, what're you doin' runnin' round the mall unsupervised?! Who knows what could've happened to you?!"
- >"I'm not a baby anymore! I don't need anyboy to watch over me!" she resopnded angrily.
- ---
- >"Wh-what? How can you say that? You're barely old enough to walk to school by yourself, let alone go to the mall!"
- >Things are getting heated
- >I decide to be the peacekeeper
- "It's alright, AJ. At least her and her friends are okay now."
- >She calms down a little.
- >"I-uh.... I suppose you're right"
- "Yeah, see. Why don't you call Big Mac up and he can take them back home"
- >"Alright fine! Y'all are lucky Anon is looking out for you today! Now just wait here until Big Mac comes and picks you guys up."
- >Applebloom discretely turns around and winks at me.
- >"Thanks anon!" she says under her breath
- >Great
- >Now she's got the wrong impression of me.
- >Maybe I should tell her that I.... don't roll in that direction.
- >But she might get the wrong idea, like I don't like her.
- >It might offend her
- >I just smile back at her.
- "No problem" I tell her quietly
- >Now I'm stuck humoring her
- >Big Mac shows up.
- >"Thanks for scooping them up for us Big Mac."
- >"Eeyup." He responds
- >I'm just staring at him now
- >At his body
- >Lost in my imagination
- >I think the girls begin to notice
- >Applejack elbows me
- >Big mac and the girls take off
- >"Now what was that all about?" asks Applejack
- "What was what?" I ask, trying to play it casual
- >"You know" Rainbow Dash adds. "The way you got all cray eyes when Appejack's brother came by."
- >I was blushing a little now
- >"YEAH, YOU WERE ALL WOOH, WOOH, UHHHH...." Pinkie Pie adds.
- >I don't know what to say
- "Whatever, you guys wanna keep shopping? We'll head off to Gucci next"
- >"OOOH YES YES YES YES!" Rarity says excitedly.
- >She blushes a little
- >"I mean, um... yes, let's go, shall we?" she says trying to regain her composure.
- >And then we're off.
- >Gotta be more careful next time
- >Can't go and act too stupid around these girls.
- ---
- >Driving home now.
- >I'm in the front seat with Rarity
- >She drops me off at my house first
- >At least now I won't have to go back to Applejack's place and make an idiot out of myself anymore
- >Arrive home
- >Say ggodbye to the girls
- >Go into my living room
- >Laptop on the table
- >Open it up to check my Facebook®.
- >1 new friend request
- >From Applebloom
- >And 10 new messages
- >From Applebloom
- >http://youtu.be/XtRCqxpyxnY?t=20s
- >Video related
- >How did she find me?
- >Well, through Applejack obviously
- >This is getting out of hand
- >I may need to cut this off before things get complicated
- >I may just need to tell her the truth.
- >Then that settles it
- >Next time I see her I'll tell her I'm not into girls like she thinks I am.
- >I don't want to make her upset though
- >Better break it to her gently.
- ---
- >Wait a few days
- >At school
- >Ocassionally see Applebloom in the hallways
- >"Hey anon!' she'd tell me
- >She would grab my arm
- >"You mind taking me to class today?"
- >Usually I would tell her that I was late for class and had to get going
- >"Oh, a-alright anon."
- >Then, I had it with her.
- >It was time to break it off
- >"Hey anon, would you mind walking me to class today?"
- "Sure, where to?"
- >Her face lit up like a kid on Christmas
- >"Chemistry! In the north wing!"
- >Now I could get a chance to talk to her a little
- "Hey, Applebloom..."
- >"Yeah anon?"
- "Can you meet me by my locker after school? I need to tell you something"
- >"Sure thing anon!" She was comepletely ecstatic.
- >Alright, step 1
- >The bell rung
- >Damn, I was late for class
- >Ah, whatever, not like I'm missing anything important
- >I figured I would just skip class and chill on my phone or something.
- >I pull it out of my pocket
- >Then I notice something
- >Someone has been on here
- >That's what I get for not putting a password on it though
- >There's a bunch of pictures on my camera roll
- >Applebloom took a bunch of pictures on my phone
- >Delete
- >Delete
- >I can tell she went through my texts too
- >Okay, I think I'm doing the right thing now.
- >Then I look up and notice Big Mac walking in the hall towards me
- >I decide to muster up a little courage and talk to him.
- "Wassup Big Mac" I say with a casual wave
- >"Heya anon."
- >He continued walking on
- >Well then....
- >He probably wouldn't reciprocate the feelings I had for him because he probably wasn't into guys
- >I've had this problem before
- >Totally misjudge someone's sexuality and make a total idiot out of myself.
- >Yep
- >Some call it gaydar
- >But I don't
- >That's just dumb
- >And we wonder why people are so weirded out by us
- >Would it be wrong of me to go and shoot down Applebloom out of my own selfish desires
- >To have someone like you....
- >But not have them like you back
- >Man, I don't want to feel that feel
- >Maybe she deserves another chance.
- >*BZZT BZZT*
- >New text
- >I open it up
- ---
- >It's from Applebloom
- >"Hey anon! It's me Applebloom! Guess how I got your number lol"
- >Crap
- >This really is reaching a creepy level
- >But that feel doe
- >But it's a little unnatural for her to be so dedicated to talking to me.
- >Or is it? She is a young girl after all.
- >I just chill for the rest of the time, listening to music, going on reddit, shitposting on 4chan
- "OP is a faggot"
- >The irony alone makes me laugh
- >The bell rings after a while
- >I go about my day.
- >Final bell rings
- >Go out to my locker
- >Applebloom is there
- >Welp, crunchtime
- >What do I do?
- >She waves at me when she sees me
- >"Heya anon!"
- >Alright
- >I go up to her
- "Hey, Applebloom, listen"
- >She perks up
- "I know that you really like me and everything...."
- >She blushes a little
- >"W-what're you talking about anon?"
- >She trys to play it cool
- >I smile a little
- >That's cute
- "Anyway, you may think that somebody likes you back. Well, you see, I don't really like girls."
- >"Well that's silly anon, if you don't like girls, then what do you like?"
- "Well, I like guys, Applebloom."
- >She looks weirded out for a second
- >"Wait, what?"
- "Yep, it's true"
- >She understands now
- >And then I see it in her face
- >She looks crushed
- "Listen Applebloom, I'm really sorry..... but I just don't like you in the same way you like me. You're a nice girl and everything, but even if I did like girls, you're a little young for me."
- >She just looks at the ground sadly
- >I put a hand on her shoulder
- "You okay?"
- >Y-yeah. I'm fine"
- >I grab her and give her a hug
- "You'll be okay"
- >I let her go
- "And besides, I bet if you found someone you're age they'd be all over you!"
- >"Really, you think so anon?"
- "Of course I do! You're a great girl, I don't see why anyone would even consider denying themselves the honor of being your boyfriend!"
- >She smiles a little now
- >"Thanks anon"
- "So you sure you'll be okay?"
- >"Yeah, I think I'll be alright"
- >She sounds a little unsure
- >But then she gives me another hug
- ---
- >She lets go.
- "Listen, I gotta get going now. I guess I'll see you around."
- >"Yeah, later anon."
- "Alright bye then"
- >"Bye anon" she just responds quietly
- >Alright, I've just succeded in ruining my own day, I feel terrible now
- >But I've probably just ruined Applebloom's week
- >Protip: life is hard.
- >Applejack's probably gonna give me an earful
- >But she knows it's for the best
- >And I do to
- >Well I will anyway
- >With time
- >As I get over the fact that I'm a complete jerk.
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