Barn sneezes

	Big Mac’s nostrils were flaring as he opened the doors to the barn and pushed inside. He could feel a sneeze building deep within his nostrils, and his head began to tilt back in anticipation. His allergies were acting up so badly today. It was all Applejack’s fault, too. His little sister could be so stubborn. He snorted angrily, causing the tickle in his nose to increase. “Ahh… UHH… Huuhhhchooooh!”

	His nose was still itching, so he sat down, deciding to wait here in case he had a sneezing fit. Outside, he could hear hooves stomping as Ponyville’s Annual Running of the Leaves was finishing. It was by far his least favorite holiday. Big Mac always sneezed a few times a day during the fall, but as long as he stayed on the farm, he was fine. The Running of the Leaves was the worst day for him, as athletic ponies competed and kicked up all sorts of dust and pollen, and so he normally stayed indoors while it was going on.

	However, this year, Applejack had agreed to host the Running, as their farm was near the usual track. Ponies started their run on Sweet Apple Acres, and looped around, finally returning to where they had started. And, of course, bringing pollen in their coats and manes, and on the heels of a giant cloud of dust. Big Mac had to sneeze again. “Huhh.. Haah.. HUHH! HUUUTSSHhooooooh!”

	He sniffled and rubbed his nose. One more sneeze, then he would go back out and finish hauling water for the racers. He was sure Applejack was one of the first to finish, and she could drink a whole barrel of water by herself. Big Mac sniffled, drawing dry air and itchy dust into his nose. “Huhh.. UHH…”

	Suddenly, the doors to the barn burst open. Big Mac snapped his hoof onto his nose, rubbing furiously to try and stop the sneeze in time. He couldn’t see who was approaching him, but he could hear them walking closer. “HAHH… HAAHUHH! UHH… Uhh… Mmm…”

	Big Mac successfully held the sneeze in, and opened his eyes to reveal one of his sister’s friends, Pinkie Pie.

	“Hiya Big Mac!” She said in a bubbly tone.

	“Hey.” He said, rubbing his nose some more. He didn’t like sneezing in front of other ponies.

	“Whatcha doin’?” Pinkie Pie asked.

	“Not much.” Big Mac replied. He wasn’t one for words. Hopefully Pinkie Pie would get the hint and leave so he could sneeze in peace. She was sitting beside him now, so it didn’t seem like he would be so lucky.

	“So you’re just hanging out in the barn, all by your lonesome self?” Pinkie Pie asked. She put her head on his shoulder. Big Mac wasn’t sure if she was trying to flirt, or what, but one thing was for sure: her hair was full of the irritants from outside. He could smell the pollen trapped in her bushy mane. His tongue pushed into his cheek, and his sneeze was underway.

	He scooted away from her, his eyes squeezing shut. She scooted right back up next to him, her hair bouncing and releasing a cloud of tickly torture. His mouth fell open and his breath began to hitch. His nostrils flared from behind his hoof. “Huhh.. Huuuh.. HUHH… HAAHUHH… AHH! AHH!”

	“OHHH…” Big Mac moaned as he just barely stopped himself from sneezing. “P-Pinkie…”

	“Yes?” Pinkie Pie said, looking up and him and batting her eyelashes.

	“You didn’t… Haah… By any chance… Ahhh… do the Ruhh.. RuhHAAH… AHHH! Running of the Laah… Leaves did you?” Big Mac managed.

	“How did you know?” Pinkie said. “Did you see me running? Did you like my sweatpants?”

	Big Mac noticed for the first time that Pinkie Pie was wearing sweatpants. She was obviously flirting with him, and he wished he had time to return her advances, but by Celestia, he needed to sneeze. He had to think of something, quick. “Pinkie, could you AHH… AHH! Huhh… go get us some Puuh… UHH… PUNCH? HAHH… AHH…”

	She nodded, releasing another cloud of itchy pollen, and it was all Big Mac could do to keep from releasing. The second she was gone, he instantly exploded into sneeze. “HHUUUUHTTIIIISHHHHOOOOOOOOOHH!! HUUUUCHHOOOOO!”

	“Huhh.. HUHH… AHHH…” Big Mac hitched, but the barn doors opened again, revealing his sister Applejack.

	“There ya’ are.” Applejack said, putting her hoof on her hip. “Now get back to work, ponies need their water!”

	“I got us punch, Big Mac.” Pinkie said, slamming into Applejack, and spilling the punch all over her. “Oh, sorry Applejack, I didn’t see you there!”

	Applejack shook herself. A cloud of dust rose off of her, tickling Big Mac’s nose to no end.

	“Ahh…” He hitched, rubbing his nose. “Haah…”

	“Geez Pinkie, why cain’t ya’ watch where yer going?” Applejack said. “An’ what’re ya’ doin’ distractin’ my brother?”

	“I wasn’t distracting him, I was just bringing him punch!” Pinkie explained.

	“Haah… HUHH..”

	“That sounds like distractin’ to me.” Applejack said.

	“Well maybe if you didn’t work him so hard all the time he wouldn’t need to hide in here and have me bring him punch!” Pinkie said.

	“AHH… AHH!”

	“Don’t tell me how to treat my family!” Applejack yelled.

	“HAAH! AHHUHH! AHH! AHH! AAHHH!” Maybe, if it looked like the two arguing mares had been leaving soon, Big Mac could have held his sneeze for a few more seconds. Perhaps even a minute. But with no end in sight, he simply had to release. “KKUUUUUURRRRUUUUUUUUTTCHHHHOOOOOOOOOOHHH!!!”

	Big Mac exploded, bending forwards, and spraying the two mares with his massive sneeze. Applejack stood there, blinking for a few seconds, before speaking up. “Ya’ apologize fer that, right now, ya’ big rascal!”

	“Huhh.. Hahh… HUUHH…” Came Big Mac’s response. Applejack promptly exited the barn.

	“Bless you, Big Mac!” Pinkie called out, before following her friend. “See you later!”

	Mares… Big Mac thought. At least now he could sneeze in peace.

	“Huhh.. Haah.. AHH! AHH!” He hitched. “HUTCHHOOO! Ahh… HUUUUCHOoooooo!”