how many lawyers

/ Q: How many lawyers does it take to     \
| change a light bulb? A: Whereas the     |
| party of the first part, also known as  |
| "Lawyer", and the party of the second   |
| part, also known as "Light Bulb", do    |
| hereby and forthwith agree to a         |
| transaction wherein the party of the    |
| second part shall be removed from the   |
| current position as a result of failure |
| to perform previously agreed upon       |
| duties, i.e., the lighting,             |
| elucidation, and otherwise illumination |
| of the area ranging from the front      |
| (north) door, through the entryway,     |
| terminating at an area just inside the  |
| primary living area, demarcated by the  |
| beginning of the carpet, any spillover  |
| illumination being at the option of the |
| party of the second part and not        |
| required by the aforementioned          |
| agreement between the parties.          |
|                                         |
| The aforementioned removal transaction  |
| shall include, but not be limited to,   |
| the following. The party of the first   |
| part shall, with or without elevation   |
| at his option, by means of a chair,     |
| stepstool, ladder or any other means of |
| elevation, grasp the party of the       |
| second part and rotate the party of the |
| second part in a counter-clockwise      |
| direction, this point being tendered    |
| non-negotiable. Upon reaching a point   |
| where the party of the second part      |
| becomes fully detached from the         |
| receptacle, the party of the first part |
| shall have the option of disposing of   |
| the party of the second part in a       |
| manner consistent with all relevant and |
| applicable local, state and federal     |
| statutes. Once separation and disposal  |
| have been achieved, the party of the    |
| first part shall have the option of     |
| beginning installation. Aforesaid       |
| installation shall occur in a manner    |
| consistent with the reverse of the      |
| procedures described in step one of     |
| this self-same document, being careful  |
| to note that the rotation should occur  |
| in a clockwise direction, this point    |
| also being non-negotiable. The above    |
| described steps may be performed, at    |
| the option of the party of the first    |
| part, by any or all agents authorized   |
| by him, the objective being to produce  |
| the most possible revenue for the       |
\ Partnership.                            /
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