2020-02-07 TOEFL: independent writing

Greg Malivuk
gmalivuk@staffordhouse.com
http://www.pastebin.com/u/gmalivuk - notes from all classes
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Homework (optional): Use the scoring rubric at https://www.ets.org/s/toefl/pdf/toefl_speaking_rubrics.pdf to estimate the scores of your speaking responses.
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Writing Section: fourth and final section; 55 minutes total; 2 tasks, 20+30 minutes of writing time
1 integrated: read a text, listen to a lecture on the same topic, then write about how the lecture relates to the text (While you write, you can see the text again, but you only hear the lecture once.)
2 independent: choice question prompt, 30 minutes to write and support your answer
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Independent
There are two basic types of choice question:
- agree/disagree: “Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?”
- some people/other people: “Some young adults prefer _____. Others choose to _____. Which do you think is better?”
Every prompt ends with something like, “Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.”
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Timing
3-5m	prewriting
	- brainstorm a few possible reasons for both sides of the question
	- try to think of details and/or examples to support some of those reasons
	- pick the side with better reasons/examples, and write a short outline with ideas in order

		with roommates
			- save money on bills (e.g. internet)
			- save money on rent (2br cheaper per room)
			- socializing (always have someone to talk to)

		it depends
			- rm’s who are friends are better than alone (social aspect, share chores)
			- alone is better than strangers (may not be social, may not share, indep better)

< 1m	thesis/lead-in
	- Write a thesis statement (explaining your opinion in your own words) and lead-in
15m	body paragraphs
	- limit yourself to 5m each (or 7 if you have two) for your supporting paragraphs
	- you can come back later to finish ideas, but it’s best to at least start each paragraph first
5m	intro and conclusion
	- write a conclusion sentence (restate your thesis and summarize your reasons)
	- add to the introduction (background, summary of the options you’re chooosing between)
	- add to the conclusion if you want to give a recommendation or prediction
5m	finish up and make corrections
	- finish any incomplete ideas from your body paragraphs (but don’t add new ideas now)
	- check your entire response for mistakes that you can fix
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The full response will be organized like a typical 5-paragraph essay:
1 Introduction: give some background, explain what options you’re choosing between, thesis+lead-in
2-4 Body paragraphs: state your reasons, show that the reasons are true, show that the reasons really do support your opinion
5 Conclusion: restate your opinion and summarize your reasons, give something for the reader to take away (prediction, advice, recommendation)
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If the independent (speaking or writing) prompt is about which “life choice” is better, start by thinking through a few typical situations where one action can be better or worse than another:
    Does one option cost more than the other?
    Does it help or hurt in different areas of life?
        education
        career
        relationships (friends or family)
        liesure activities
        necessary activities (chores, taxes, etc.)
        budget
        responsibilities
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Writing Practice - ETS Guide test 1 - Independent
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BREAK
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Look at the sample responses. Use the descriptions on p. 613 of your book to decide what score each one should probably receive.
A - 1 - The only sentence that really answers the question doesn’t make sense. There is no development of any ideas.
B - 5 - This is a good example of an “it depends” response, because the supporting paragraphs explain why most young adults want independence but not all of them are suited for it yet. There are mistakes, but they generally don’t interfere with understanding.
C - 1 - “This essay fails to make any coherent points and is filled with errors of language and usage.”
D - 2 - There are two reasons but they aren’t well developed. The errors are a bigger problem than development, though. “This response fails to earn a 3 because it contains so many language errors and sentences that obscure meaning.”
E - 3 - There are two reasons with fairly good support, though there isn’t a conclusion. “This essay fails to earn a score of 4 mainly because of errors that obscure meaning.”
F - 2 - “The generalizations made are only barely supported.” There are also frequent errors that obscure meaning.
G - 3 - There’s some redundancy and not a clear conclusion. In addition, the number of errors shows “weakness in command of language” and sometimes obscures meaning.
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A person must decide whether to leave _____ parents.
- their: This is how most English speakers talk, but some people think it’s ungrammatical because “they” is supposed to be plural. (They’re historically wrong: singular “they” is older than singular “you”.)
- his or her: awkward and repetitive, especially in sentences with multiple forms of the pronoun
- his: sexist, excludes women or assumes male by default, old-fashioned
- “People must decide whether to leave their parents.” - If the whole thing is plural, no one thinks “they” is a problem.

On the TOEFL, you won’t lose points for any of these options, but your sentences can become pretty unclear if you swtich around between them.
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Another issue with pronouns is how to talk about people in general. As above, there are several options, and the important thing is that you don’t switch between them in the middle of an example.

Living alone helps them gain independence. - Third person removes the writer and the reader from the specifics of the situation. It’s the most formal option.
Living alone helps you gain independence. - General “you” is most common in speaking and feels natural to native speakers. Even though it refers to the reader and everyone else, it is singular: “your house”, your life”, “yourself”.
Living alone helps us gain independence. - This includes the writer in the situation. It’s more informal and friendly. Remember that “we” is plural: “our houses”, “our lives”, “ourselves”.

The problem would be sentences like, “When young adults live by themselves, we can get independence from your parents.”
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Especially for topics about life choices, specific examples of (possibly imaginary) people in your life can be useful support for some or all of your reasons. Those examples will be first or third-person singular, which should be easy to distinguish from generic statements.
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Homework (optional): If you want more feedback on your writing than a score and a sentence or two, email me with a self-evaluation. What did you do well (or better than last time)? What could you have done better? What will you try to improve for next time?