"Kamui..." Even a week after their expedited wedding, Ashura still needed a moment of steeling his nerves to grasp her hand. Perhaps her more-than-human nature lent it that cool softness no practiced swordmaster should have; his own fingers must have felt like sandpaper against her skin. He was suddenly remembering that he hadn't bothered to scrub under his chipped fingernails in the bath last night, too, and there had to be a visible ring of dirt, and was he really trying to have a serious conversation looking like such a mess--he went to pull his hand back and play off the gesture as only getting her attention, but both of her hands caught his.

"Ashura," she chided, drawing him to sit on the plush couch. "What's the matter? You look almost as nervous as our wedding night."

His face went hot in a flash. Was she disappointed? Even plenty of younger men had a wider breadth of experience than him. Too many years of his life had been spent on the road, looking for a back to stab while keeping knives out of his own. Had she been expecting some sort of worldly sex sage and was unhappy with the dirty, anxious reality? This wasn't the conversation he'd been preparing to have.

Despair must have shown on his face (or perhaps it was his utter lack of response), because concern was flashing in her eyes as she rubbed circles on the back of his hand. "Oh Ashura, I'm sorry. I was only joking. You looked so worried that you could explode."

His cheeks were warm from consternation with himself, now. Get a hold of yourself, man, he told himself firmly, doing his best to sit up straight. He kept sinking into the overstuffed couch too much for it to make much visual difference (more than once he'd dozed off on the damn thing and woken up in a haze of confusion, thinking he'd accidentally made camp in a swamp) but at least he felt better.

He cleared his throat.

"Do you need some water?"

"No, uh, thank you. Uhm..." Gazing into her earnest crimson eyes, the topic on his mind now seemed so inappropriate. "We're married now."

"Ye-es." She looked more concerned than ever. "Should I get Elise? Has something happened?"

"No, I'm fine--what I'm worried about is something that could happen--might happen--if you want--" He heaved a sigh, wondering how he'd made a mess of this so quickly. "If you get pregnant--and have a child--what do we tell our son or daughter about me?"

There was something oddly skeptical in her expression when he said 'if', but it melted into confusion before he could understand it. "What do you mean?"

"I have no illusions about my station, Kamui. I know that you accept me--and it's made me the happiest I've ever been--" On impulse, he lifted her hand and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. The sight of her rare dusky pink blush drew tension's claws out of his shoulders. "But it's another thing entirely for a child to hear about the life I've lived. A father should be someone you respect."

Kamui's brow darkened, but after a split second her face became gentle. "Ashura..."

She leaned into his neck, settling on her knees. "I think our child should definitely hear about how brave their father is," she murmured, lips tickling his thoat. Her thoughful hum resonated in his chest.

"Kamui..."

Pressing a kiss onto his pulse point, she pushed herself up. "Oh, but our child must hear about how noble he is, too." Her fingers carded through his hair. She shuffled over to straddle one of his thighs, neatly situating herself in his lap. Hot lips skimmed over his ear.

"K-Kamui--"

"And he's so humble, too." Slow, languid kisses trailed over his temple, cool fingers holding his wild bangs back. "Every good hero's got some modesty to him, I think. Perhaps a little too self-sacrificing, but we can work on that."

His eyes instinctively squeezed shut when he felt her breath, and he felt two featherlight kisses over each lid. "Strong, of course. And they have to hear of his cleverness, his...hardiness." She giggled under her breath, and he felt himself turn red for a new reason.

When he felt her peck his nose, he dared to crack one eye open. Listening to his own ragged breathing was only making things worse. "Ah, and how did I forget about handsome?"

Her hands were trailing to his waist as her lips hovered over his, their exhales mixing so he could nearly taste her. "But it's most important that our children hear of their father's great love, for he was beside himself with worry about how he could make their lives better before they were even born. I don't think there's anything in there to be ashamed of, Ashura."