Cult of Anon, the offering

> wake up in the morning
> hear some sort of chanting
> moan in my half slumber
Dammit.....
> "the great one arises!"
> "Fetch the offerings!"
> the two ponies leave, only to return a few moments later with a plate of meat and a glass of what looks to be tomato juice
> I am reasonably skeptical
Where did you get this meat?
> "A loyal subject donated it to our cause!"
> "Yes, he wanted to repent for a past misdeed"
So long as the meat is normal
> start eating, it's got a consistency like beef
> Fluttershy and Lyra look on with joy as I devour the meal
> I make to take a swig of the tomato juice and a rather metallic smell hits my nose
> a quick touch of the tongue confirms my fears
This is blood
> "The blood of the one who repented"
> "That way you accept his offering!"
> do an immediate spit take
> Lyra calls for Big Mac
please tell me you didn't
> "Eeeyup"
> Big mac walks into the room, limping significantly
What did you do, that you wanted to repent?
> "Made fun o' these two"
and so you gave your blood?
> he turns to the side to reveal a large gash from his flank
Oh....oh god
> "Do ya' fergive me master?"
Don't tell me I ate you?
> he nods his head yes
> I run to the toilet and heave up what I had eaten
> The three follow me to the bathroom
> I hear Big Mac weeping, the other two consoling him
> "Don't give up hope, he'll forgive you soon"
> "Just keep trying, he'll come around"
> when I'm done, I come out of the bathroom, and all three stare at me intensely
> They then begin to chant, begging for my forgiveness
> I walk around them, ignoring their chants
> before lunch, Big Mac is passes out on the floor, and I rush him to the hospital
> I am later informed that would be an indicator that I have forgiven him, and that he is now a dedicated member of the cult of Anon
> fuck