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- >Before you can get to the door, Rainbow stops you. "Whoa whoa whoa! We are NOT walking out there again!"
- >She facehoofs. "I feel stupid enough going through town once like this. Maybe they'll think it's not me?"
- "Yeah, without the mane and colors you all look exactly the same."
- >You point to Fluttershy.
- "'Cept her. Can't tell why."
- >Fluttershy proudly fans her wings, but Rainbow is only momentarily distracted
- >"No no no, blue fur, magenta eyes..."
- "I'm going to be honest, Dash. Your actual identity is just the rainbow. No one knew."
- >"Wh-people know me! I talk to people every day!"
- "Yeah, but all they hear is 'I mash muffs, I mash muffs.'"
- >She starts to laugh, and you cover her mouth just in time
- >"Alright, seriously, no, don't. I don't want my reputation completely ruined."
- >Rarity stepped in, carrying some geometric monstrocity of a gem. She caught a brief glimpse of you and stopped
- >She was desperately keeping a polite smile on her face. You're not sure if she wanted to laugh or scream in terror.
- >"H-hello Fluttershy! Who, um, who's this?"
- "Hahaha! I told ya, Dash!"
- >The laughter racks your body again, but the immediate pain in your sides causes you to flinch and stop
- >You're still snickering under your breath, though. Rainbow looked at the floor.
- >"I don't know whether to feel insulted or relieved."
- >Fluttershy cleared her throat again. "It's Anon and Rainbow Dash."
- >Rarity heaved a sigh. "Poison joke again?"
- >Both you and Fluttershy nod.
- "Hey, you wouldn't have some sort of disguisy spells that would make me look not plague-ridden would you?"
- >She wondered for a moment. "Let me drop this off for Twilight while I think."
- >She left for the lab, and you were in the silence again, save the occasional gasp for breath between silent chuckles.
- >You feel painfully bored immedietly.
- "So...aren't you guys being super racist when you call me an asshole?"
- >Fluttershy began to speak, when Rarity exited. "Alright, Rainbow Dash, I believe I have something. What would you like to look like?"
- "Alicorn, black fur, neon green stripes, red eyes."
- >Her mouth dropped open. "That's...the worst idea I've...Neon? What's--"
- "Fuck it, just make me brown."
- >"Right, right."
- >Her horn glowed for a moment, and a few seconds of intense itching later, you look back into the mirror.
- >Tanned fur that fits with the hyena motif. Looks nice, you suppose, but doesn't really fit on a pony's body.
- >Especially not a pegasus. Rainbow snorted and crossed her arms, unable to stop smiling. "I look like a freak because of you, Anon."
- >The fashionista raised her nose. "Humph. I think it looks fine. A competent aesthetic."
- >"Yeah, well I miss my rainbow!"
- "I miss the 2 seconds I was inside the jar! The jar was comfy and had the promise of hands."
- >Both of you huff and slump over.
- >Rarity waits for a moment, and pats you on the shoulder. "It should last for about an hour and a half. It's the best I can do."
- >"Nah, it's alright Rares. Thanks."
- >She merely nods, and walks to the exit. "Anytime, Rainbow."
- "So, let's go out and laugh at people."
- >Dash sighed. "Look, I'd rather just not attract attention, and keep on the downlow. We could just wait here an--"
- >Twilight pokes her head out the lab door. "I can't concentrate! Go out and do something. In a hour or two I should have the cure ready."
- >Rainbow whined and rolled onto her side on the couch. "But it's embarassing!"
- >"Well, control yourself and it will be fine! Just pretend to be someone else for a day, it will be a fun experiment."
- >Eventually you're herded out of the house, and the door closes behind you.
- >Your ever-present grin dampens a little as Rainbow lets it sink in. Fluttershy gives her a sympathetic expression
- >"We could stay at your house, if you want."
- >Rainbow shook her head. "Nah, Rarity went out of her way to make this spell for me. Might as well use it.
- >She regained a bit of her confident posture. "Besides, it actually does kind of sound nice to be someone else for a while."
- "I want the record to show I started this new sensation."
- >You looked to Flutters for confirmation, only to hear her say "Well, I think the changelings kind of did that first."
- >Son of a bitch. You'll never get minor street cred now.
- >Dash immedietly stops. "Wait! Cutiemark!" She looks behind. One is completely covered by a spot
- >Looking back, the other is mostly covered, with only the end of the rainbow poking out
- "If you're done staring at your assets, we need a name."
- >Dash clicked her tongue and looked up. "Wisecrack?"
- "Jive Lark."
- >"Jest mcChortle."
- "Cacklejack."
- >She quickly covers her mouth, the giggle not escaping your throat. "Alright, Cacklejack it is."
- >Fluttershy laughed lightly. You get carried away, looking at her for too long, until she blushes and averts eyecontact
- >You can feel Rainbow questioning in the back of your mind, and try to shove her out
- >Eventually she stops, and you're back in the thick of town.
- >Some ponies continue giving you odd looks, but they seem almost more at peace, now that you're not laughing to death
- >It actually appears most of them didn't take her as Dash, and the smile you have seems to put them to rest
- >At least at first glance, that is. If you look at them too long, they seem to get on edge
- >From your reflection in various windows, you can tell your grin looks a bit more "predatory" than "friendly"
- >Dash is silently contemplating how she wants to play this out. After all, she has a free license to be anyone
- >After all you put her through, you feel she kinda deserves to choose.
- >Eventually, you sit on a bench and let her think it out.
- >Before much thinking actually gets done, a pegasus descends next to you both
- >"Hey! Fluttershy, have you seen Dash today? She hasn't shown up for work."
- >Fluttershy starts stuttering, looking from side to side. "W-well, she um, I haven't--"
- >Rainbow takes control. "Saw 'er flyin' ta the everfree earlier!"
- >You can't stop yourself from exploding with a strained laugh at the painfully forced accent
- >The pegasus hovers for a moment, before unassuredly waving and taking off. "Thanks."
- >The laughing continues, although you manage to quiet it, till eventually the burning makes it stop
- >Fluttershy embarassedly glances around, trying to avoid weird looks.
- "Flutters, you don't have to stick around."
- >Rainbow nods. "Yeah, I know this is making you uncomfortable."
- >"Oh, not at all!" She slides closer. "I'll stick by your side! You are my best friends."
- >You feel pride swelling in your chest, and a similar reaction from Rainbow. "Thanks, 'Shy."
- >She smiles and leans her head on you. You feel your smile soften considerably, and close your eyes, letting the moment sink in.
- >After some time, (Though not enough,) Rainbow decides to get up. "C'mon, let's get breakfast."
- >She giggles. "At this point, it's lunch."
- >"Bah, same thing as far as I'm concerned."
- "Amen to that."
- >"What?"
- >Before you can answer, you nearly fall over as someone bumps into you. You gain your bearings and look up
- >Before Rainbow can even confront her, your eyesight is covered in pink
- >"Ohmygosh ohmygosh a new pony in town! Hi, my name is Pinkie Pie!"
- >Rainbow pauses and looks from side to side. You feel your smile twitching nervously
- "Oi, wot's up?"
- >You're even worse at this accent than Rainbow.
- >"Tell me your name, Silly! And introduce me to your friend here!"
- >Fluttershy sighed. "I've known you for 6 years, Pinkie."
- >"Right! Heheh, sometimes I forget."
- 'Come on Rainbow, say something'
- >She doesn't. You grin wider, exposing un-ponylike fangs
- "Moy name iz Cacklejack! Pleased ta meet ya!"
- >You feel stupid
- >You usually feel like that, but like, now it's REALLY stupid
- >A bunch of standerbys seemed to be staring at you, even though logically you knew they probably weren't
- >Rainbow definitely thought so, however, and refused to give up the charade while they had a chance to hear
- >You chuckle nervously, looking from side to side
- >Anything to avoid that adorable bright-eyed optimism that fucking pink nightmare has
- >"I have a friend named Applejack, any relation?"
- "Nah mate, 'avent a farmer in moy family."
- >She grabs your hoof and shakes it. "Okay! How long'll ya be staying? I could throw a party for you!"
- >Your chuckle becomes upgraded to a chortle, and you shake your head. "Not long, mate. Oi'll jast be stickin' around for a bit."
- >"Aww! Well, I'm sure Fluttershy can show you around! See you, Cacklejack!"
- >She walks by Fluttershy and whispers something in her ear, before bouncing off down the road.
- >Rainbow heaved a sigh of relief. "Luna's nutsack I swear I was about to crack."
- >Ew.
- "What'd Pinkie say?"
- >Fluttershy moved her hoof in a circle, thinking of the words to say. "She uh...she told me your smile wasn't 'right.'"
- >You nodded, and she continued. "And how, um...She'll be keeping an eye on you."
- "Reasonable."
- >As Rainbow's nervousness builds, the laughter hightens in pitch and rate
- >"R-Rainbow, please control yourself.."
- >The chittering giggles continued, and you were suddenly turned around and carted back towards the town outskirts
- >"Nope, nope, going back home, Rarity's disguise was too good. If Applejack finds out I'm fucked."
- >"Rainbow Dash! Stop panicking!"
- >You try to stop, and in the fight for control you trip over yourself onto the ground
- "You really are going overboard Dash. Your rep isn't that important."
- >"I'm in like five lies right now! I could lose my job, or worse, get a lecture!"
- >She gasped. "I could get a lecture from Cloudkicker, Pinkie, AND Applejack!"
- "FUCK, run, run you stupid cunt!"
- >Before you get far, you feel a tug at your tail pulling you back, and look back to see Fluttershy's stern face
- >"Dash! You are overreacting. Everyone's trying to be nice to you."
- "Stalking isn't very nice. I should know."
- >
- >Your laughter resumes, slightly less nervous
- "Don't worry, I didn't watch ALL of you in the shower. Multiple times."
- >More cackling and otherwise silence, until eventually Roseluck approaches you.
- >"Excuse me, Fluttershy, miss. But you're...well, frankly scaring customers off."
- 'How many people buy flowers a day for your business to actually fucking matter?'
- >Rainbow stifled as much as she could, but the chuckles continued. "Roight, sorry mate."
- >You cracked up again. She sounded like she had many cocks in her mouth, as opposed to the normal all-purpose cockmouth she normally had
- >Roseluck seemed very uncomfortable, and walked back to her stand, as you and Flutters kept moving
- >You felt your wings flare, and started to take off. Before you get far, you hear a excited gasp. "Excuse me! Excuse me, miss!"
- >You drop back to the ground, and Fluttershy points you to the origin of the voice, a small orange filly. On a scooter.
- >'Fuck.'
- >You hear Rainbow's subconscious grind to a screeching halt
- >"Um, I'm sorry if this is rude to ask, but why don't you have a cutie mark?"
- >Dash grinned. "Aha! Hah, haha, um, Ya see kid, I, uh..."
- >You figure it's time to step in before Rainbow has a meltdown
- "Hyena-ponies don't get cutie marks."
- >Scootaloo's large eyes widened. "Oooh. Cool!" You nod, and she gets back on the scooter. "Thanks, lady!"
- >Wow that was fucking easy. Dash seems like a huge pussy now.
- >"You're not the one who was put in the position of lying to two of the most important people in your life!"
- "That's cause I'm in the ephemeral plane, bitch! They all gone!"
- >The laughter, even the smile, came to a halt for a moment as Rainbow winced. "I'm sorry, Anon."
- >You tried to put on a smirk, and it came easily enough to turn into a full blown grin, with the help of poison joke.
- "You don't have to worry, Dash. I can take a hit."
- >"Yeah, but that kind of stuff...not cool."
- >Dash sat down, and Fluttershy put her arm around your shoulders, trying to give a reassuring squeeze
- >Fucking adorable. You lean in and place your snout under hers.
- >In the silence, you can hear a giddy not-so-quiet whisper between two ponies behind you. "Aww, cuuute, Fluttershy got a date!"
- >You turn around to the voice
- "Just cause we fuck doesn't mean we're dating."
- >Lyra coughs up her drink and Bonbon jumps. Your laughter returns, full and loud, and Fluttershy jumps up to her hooves
- >"Anon! Don't go saying things like that! That's not a good joke."
- "Hahaha! Baby, we both know it aint no joke. Hahaha!"
- >You take off, and with the muscle memory and observation you've accrued, you manage to fly fairly well
- >Fluttershy hurriedly takes off after you, and you both swirl around in the air, lazily making your way to Dash's place
- >Occasionally you start to lose it, but Rainbow makes adjustments to keep you in control, and otherwise determine the rest yourself
- >Honestly, this is probably the best you've felt in a decade, at least
- >The sky seems to softly curl around you, and the way the light bounces off clouds and into your eyes is intoxicating
- >The whistling in your ears drops as you slow down and land on a small cloud.
- >You always fancied yourself as returning to human, but it seems a very difficult choice now. You're not sure you could give this up
- >Flutters lands next to you, and you can't stop yourself from grabbing her in a tight embrace.
- "Thanks, guys. The past few days have been fun as all hell, even if I whine a lot."
- >After a few moments, Dash clears her throat. "It's kind of awkward being between my best friend and her boyfriend."
- >Flutters immedietly flings herself back and drops off the cloud. After a moment, she floats back up
- "Wow, faggot, took a while for that to sink in, huh?"
- >Rainbow rolled your eyes. "It got pretty obvious after a while. You were constantly going on about her, after all."
- >"He was?"
- "I was?"
- >Dash crossed her arms. "All day. 'Ooh, I wonder what Fluttershy thinks' this, 'She has pretty eyes' that."
- "You sure that wasn't you, Lezzy-mc-I-like-cunts-because-I'm-homosexual-and-thus-attracted-to-females?"
- >"I don't look at mares' eyes."
- >Caught off guard, you nearly fall off the cloud yourself, laughing
- >Eventually your ribs start hurting again, and you force yourself to stop, clearing your eyes
- >You're not quite sure what Fluttershy's expression is. She seems confused, and not alltogether comfortable
- >Her cheeks were flushed red and she refused to make eyecontact for a full second at a time, averting her gaze as soon as you meet
- >Dash shook her head. "See! There you go again!"
- >You're confused for a moment, and chuckle
- "You're just fuckin with me."
- >"No I'm not! Look, just, empty your mind for a second or whatever."
- >She closes her eyes, and cut off communication with you
- >
- >You don't really notice anything out of the ordinary.
- >Gay joke ready for when you open your eyes? Check.
- >Self hatred? Oh, that's always on the backburner, don't even know why you check anymore.
- >Toothy grin? Yeah, that ain't worn off yet.
- "Rainbow, I don't know what you're--"
- >You open your eyes, and immediately lock eyes with Flutters
- >For a moment, you feel your heart leap, and your vision glow ever so slightly
- >"You see?! That shit, all day!"
- >Fluttershy raises her hoof up to her face, looking to the side. "I don't understand..."
- >Fuck.
- >You do have actual lasting feelings.
- >You didn't sign on the wild ride for this shit.
- >Rainbow raised both her hooves to the sky. "Gay jokes aside, that was REALLY fucking confusing for the first few hours!
- >"Every time I look at her, my heart leaps, cheeks flush, tingly feeling, all of that! Thought I was going crazy."
- >Flutters waved her hoof, and you focused on her again. "Um, what are you saying...?"
- >Rainbow retched as if she were going to hurl. "I'm saying Anon has some serious puppy love for you."
- >You hold your arm up.
- "I don't love things. That's Flutters' job. I just hate things."
- >Rainbow chuckled under her breath, and Fluttershy frowned and looked off to the ground below.
- >Fuck, she took that personally.
- >Fuuuck, you don't want to apologize. That's for pussies
- >She rubs her arm and keeps her eyes averted.
- "H-hey, Flutters, I didn't mean that."
- >She put on a token smile, but you could tell it still bothered her. You let out a heavy sigh.
- "Alright, alright. Don't hold this over me though!"
- >You lean in.
- "I love you, Fluttershy."
- >She instantly lights up and grins, hugging you. "I love you, Anon!"
- >Fuuuuuck, your heart is about to explode
- >You're not sure if it's merciful or a war crime when Dash pushes her away.
- >"I can deal with hugs, or with being forced to say that I love you, but not both at once."
- >Fluttershy giggles and nods. "Sometimes I forget myself."
- >A green flash explodes directly to your left.
- >A vial labeled "POISON JOKE ANTIDOTE" smacks into your head and lands on the cloud, along with a letter
- "Convenient."
- >You open the vial and pop it in your mouth, while opening a letter.
- >'Jar will be ready around noon tomorrow. --Princess Twilight Sparkle'
- >As the last of the potion travels down your throat, you feel your ribs loosening considerably and the strain in your face softening
- >You look down, and the spots are gone. Up, and your hair is a rainbow
- >Your fur is still brown, though. Probably will wear off. Probably.
- >Dash sighs. "Alright, let's go home and watch shitty movies."
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