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- "So you gonna help me out?"
- >"I don't like you, Anon."
- "And that's perfectly valid, but this time, it actually is all your fault. So you do kind of have to help."
- >"You could just deal with it."
- "No, I could deal with it when it was cute ponies doing cute things. We're both assholes. This won't work."
- >"I still don't know who this 'we' is."
- "Murderous changeling."
- >"Ha-ha, very fun--"
- "His name is Chungus and he genuinely does want to beat the shit out of you so I'm going to warn you to stop being a smug bitch."
- >Her unimpressed frown grows ever larger, and the corner of her mouth twitches. "Right. And how could a changeling get in you?"
- "Are you implying you wouldn't let a changeling inside you if he asked? Come on, Twilight. We all know."
- >"That's not what I meant."
- "I don't hear you denying it!"
- >"That's because you wouldn't care."
- >You hold your arms up in the air
- "THANK YOU! See, Chungus, this is what I have to reduce you to."
- >Chungus stared directly into Twilight's eyes, expressionless
- 'You're not going to ACTUALLY kill her, right? I need her. If she dies, then I'm on good terms with over half the ponies here. That's terrible!'
- >'I wouldn't actually kill her. I do want to slap her."
- 'I want to surgically remove her shitty personality.'
- >'I want her to clean every latrine in the changeling army's outposts consequatively.'
- 'I want to tell her to shit herself and sit in that shit until she gets really itchy.'
- >You stare off in to space, before a throat-clearing jolted you out of your daze
- "God damnit, Twilight, I have 99 problems and you are 36 of them. You need to fix this."
- >"Tomorrow."
- >You sigh.
- "Fine. I'll be in the guest room."
- >"What? No you wont! Get out of my home! Go to Fluttershy's place or something!"
- "Uh, about that, I can't because changeling--"
- >Not a moment passed before you were on the doorstep of the castle, bright pinkish-purple light fading from your vision
- "Alright, fuck you too TwittleShite Spunkle."
- >You stand up, walking away from the castle.
- >Fuck.
- >Staying with Flutters is probably out of the question
- >Dash is almost definitely already asleep and you don't want to be a prick and wake her
- >You do want to be a prick to Rarity, and she would be harmony-bound to let you sleep there, but that's a bit too dickish for you
- >Man. You really are making progress.
- >The only option is Pinkie.
- >Words that were spoken more than you'd think, and more than you'd hope
- >While there was still enough rays of light to see, you hopped into the air and glided through the streets
- >You turn to the street, only to see Sugarcube Corner dark, all the lights off.
- >Fuck. With your luck, Pinkie has some party planned for the morning.
- >'We'll be sleeping outside, then.'
- 'I'm not a fucking barbarian, Chungus The Fungus.'
- >'I've had to sleep outside most my life. You're lucky if you ever even get a tent.'
- 'You have to have pants for that, dipshit.'
- >'W-...No. Yes. Okay, I accept. You're right.'
- 'No I am not you intellectual coward.'
- >You turn your head to see there's still a house with lights on. You vaguely recognize it, but you're not sure why.
- >You slide up to it, and hear arguing voices from the window
- >You can barely make out "Just because the library burnt down doesn't mean you can keep your books forever, Lyra!"
- >"There's no one to return them to! I get to keep my moeshit books forever!"
- >"What's a moeshit?!"
- >Perfect.
- >You knock on the door, and you hear them trying to whisper and obviously failing as they argue over who should get up and open the door
- >Eventually they both open it, and Bonbon immediately starts to close it
- >You hold out your hoof and keep the door open, and Lyra huffs, elbowing her roomate/'best friend'/fuckbuddy.
- >"That's not very nice." She turned back to you. "What's up?"
- "I need a place to stay for the night."
- >"Uh...I'm sure there's a inn around the corn--"
- "CHECK OUT THIS SHIT"
- >You pull back your hoof, and transform it in a flash of green, into a five-fingered awkward chubby horse-hand
- >Lyra opens the door wider. "Alright get in."
- >"Lyra! That's a changeling!"
- >You point at Bonbon, wagging your finger.
- "Not 'a' changeling, a lich AND a changeling."
- >Lyra nodded, proudly grinning. "I guessed as much!"
- >Bonbon snickers at the quip, covering her mouth
- >How come Lyra gets laughs and everyone just hates you?
- >Fucking cyborgs. Normie or fun. Pick one.
- "So anyways I'm gonna go sleep on the couch now."
- >"Wait! You have to teach me out to do that!"
- >You shrug.
- "Become undead using various ash-like alchemical ingredients related to changelings inside a jar."
- >"If that's what it takes!"
- >Bonbon sighed. "I'm not letting you kill yourself to become some magical creature, Lyra."
- "Worked for me."
- >
- >"I--Still! That's too much of a risk!"
- "Suicide is painless. It brings on many changes."
- >"Get ahold of yourself!"
- >You chuckle and walk in, Lyra closing the door behind you.
- "Say, Chungus, you got any tips for a poor unicorn in the wrong body?"
- >He let out a low growl, teeth becoming more fang-like. "I don't like this."
- "I don't like you!"
- >You turn the frown into a grin, popping your appearance into that of a changeling
- "C'moon! I'll even let you feel at home!"
- >He immediately changes back. "I'm not going to--"
- "I'm bringing out the porn again."
- >"I YIELD! I yield!" He jumped back, wings flared out and ready to take off.
- "Good, Chunguluffagus, good. You're halfway to being my bitch already."
- >You look to the side, Bonbon's terrified expression and Lyra's shining eyes both bolstering your self confidence.
- >You could tell Chungus was uncomfortable, skin crawling as he tried to change back into you. "Just focus on your hoof for now."
- >You didn't let him, of course. That would be too easy.
- >Lyra held her hoof in front of her face, locking eyes on it intensely.
- >"Alright, now what?"
- >"Now change your hoof into a hand."
- >You exhale quickly, trying to hold back a lurching laughter. Lyra, however, takes it completely seriously.
- >She grits her teeth and her horn starts to glow a light golden, but nothing happens.
- >"It's not working!"
- >Chungus sighed. "Okay, let's start baby steps. Try changing the color of your hoof."
- >Lyra frowned. "I don't think it'll work like this. I don't have any direction to put the magic."
- >He looked to the ceiling, humming lowly. "I admit, it's been many years since I was taught the remedial aspects of shapeshifting. I don't quite remember all of it."
- >"Hum..." She a hoof on her chin.
- "Fuck it, then. Tell her the advanced theorems and shit."
- >Chungus blinked. "Um. Okay. I suppose it's a lot like acting, from what I understand of pony culture. You have to pretend you're someone else. In a way, you kind of have to fool yourself."
- "Man, it must be really easy for a guy like you."
- >He was silent for a moment, before it clicked. "Hey!"
- "Hay is for horses you changeling fuck."
- >"I'm going to kill you once I'm--Son of a bitch."
- >You feel a warm pride overtaking you, and Chungus covers his mouth and burps.
- >"Wow, you...actually genuinely love being an asshole. That's concerning."
- "Be thankful for the food and get to work."
- >After at least an hour, Bonbon finally tapped her friend on the shoulder. "We need to get to sleep."
- >Lyra hung her head. "Yeah. I guess so. I never got it down, though."
- "Ah, don't worry about that. I'm sure it takes more than a hour of practice to get it down."
- >"Not really." Chungus said, "It takes just about that long to get a perfect disguise."
- "Wow. Fuck you, dude. Anyways can we sleep on the couch?"
- >Bonbon heavily sighed, and Lyra handed you a blanket "Yeah. Sure. Just get out when you wake up."
- "Can do, boss!"
- >You raise your hole-y hoof your forehead and scuttle yourself onto the couch, chittering and buzzing on the way
- >Being a bug is more fun than you'd think.
- >Apparently still gross, though, and you can see Bonbon barely containing her disgust
- >You enhance your face, blinking with bright reflective eyes and a childlike smile, hiding your nose under the covers
- >She covered her mouth and nearly retches, and Lyra held her hooves together at the side of her face. "Awww!"
- >Once they ascended the stairs, you stretch out, and look up at the ceiling.
- >'You're pretty good at mooching off people.'
- 'You're good at being a poser. I mean, I know what you said about me was sarcastic, but I'm genuinely congratulating you.'
- >'...Why are you being nice?'
- 'Why wouldn't I be? You're a valued friend of mine.'
- >'What?'
- 'I know I sometimes seem like a jerk. I'm really sorry about that. It's not your fault you're stuck with me, after all.'
- >'That's...really nice of yo--'
- 'I'm just kidding. You sound like a faggot.'
- >'Why did I think you meant--'
- 'Nah I'm just messing you. I do mean it, I just can't help myself from joking.'
- >'I...suppose I understand. In either case, thank--'
- 'You really are cancer though.'
- >'You lit--'
- 'I'm joking with you with you! Haha, really!'
- >'I--"
- 'But you are a insect version of herpes.'
- >'Wh--'
- 'Nah, I'm jesting! Having a giggle! A chuckle. A guffaw! I do like you!'
- >'I'm going to sleep.'
- >Before you could respond, you feel him immediately conk out, into a deep sleep. Huh. Sounds like a useful ability.
- >You snuggle down into a crevice in the couch, closing your own eyes
- >You see in your mind's eye Chungus' dream, a seeming distant recollection of his training in the hive
- >Chrysalis herself is giving a lecture on 'becoming your enemy.' You figure you'll sit around and listen until you fall asleep yourself.
- >Although you didn't quite notice at first, it rapidly became clear to you that you were still unconscious
- >Your body was small and lanky, somewhere between childlike and adolescent
- >Still completely changeling, though. Around you, various others buzzed through the strange architecture
- >You weren't quite sure if the non-euclidean buildings were a side effect of the dreaming or how the hive actually looked in reality
- >Chungus' mind was quietly ringing, and you couldn't shake the feeling of being in a haze.
- >You tried to ask if he was awake, but either he didn't respond, or you were too distracted to actually send the message. Slowly you lose your lucidity
- >He stood up, and awkwardly stumbled through the street
- >Several bats, snakes, weasels, and other generally-considered pests moved along the upside-down walkways and flight paths of their owners
- >Fluttershy would be proud. Actually, it just hit you, they probably would use pets as a food source.
- 'So, you got a pet, Chungy?'
- >"W-what?! Who said that?"
- >Ah! Now he heard you. Time to fuck with him.
- 'Giant spider, zombified golem, a bubonic plague cell the size of a small dog. Something equally nasty.'
- >"N-no, I don't have a pet yet." He looked wildly around the streets, backing up into a wall. The landscape started dimming and becoming sharper
- >His high pitched voice was getting on your nerves. You hate children.
- 'Good, you can be my pet'
- >"I'm not sure I want to be your pet..."
- 'That's what they all say. But a flash of the monkey D changes their minds. Or doesn't. You're getting it either way.'
- >"I need an ad--"
- 'I AM AN ADULT.'
- >You can barely retain your laughter, and Chungus gasps, starting to run away
- >The dreamscape around you shifts and contorts, shadows turning pitch plack and pointed, the other passerbys either gone or shifted into disembodied monsterish gazes
- >His lungs pump at full capacity, and you can feel your legs burning
- >He cycles through dozens of disguises, trying to duck between an alleyway or behind a box, but every hiding place seems to retreat from him
- >Eventually Chrysalis steps out from a yellow and green haze. She held her arm out and grabbed you, pulling you to her chest.
- >"Chungus, you made me so afraid!"
- >Oh my fuck he actually internalized that name
- >He stepped back. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to...I just got lost. It was like everything was flipped or upside down."
- >"You should be careful, sweetie. Spirits like him are up to no good. All they do is make trouble. I don't think this is the place for you."
- >"W-what?! No, mom! It was just one little fight!"
- >"I'm sorry son, but you have to move. I'm assigning you to your aunt and uncle in Bel Mare."
- >You jump straight up, spine tingling and sweat running down your exoskeleton
- >You look to the right and left. You're on the couch again
- "No."
- >You're not sure why, but you felt compelled, as if you had to say that. Chungus nodded his head, "No." he affirmed.
- >
- >
- "Yeah. No."
- >You stand up, looking at the morning rays of the sun entering through the living room window. It doesn't seem like Lyra or Bonbon are up yet
- >Looking down and seeing your exposed changeling arms sent a shiver down your spine, and you switch back to your regular style
- >You fold the blanket and leave it on the couch, and get a glass of water, sipping it down and leaving the home.
- >You figure that you're probably the last thing Bonbon would want to see early in the morning, after all.
- >Walking down the street, not too many ponies are out yet. That's okay, though. You kind of need some silence right now.
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