War for the Imgur Wastelands, Part 1. Forum Story Dump.

Day 56
It's been almost 2 months since @AmiAthena left. IC has devolved into roving bands of raiders vying for control over the wasteland she left in her wreckage. The warlord @pogon has united 2 of the tribes formerly led by @Timfaobian and @epigirl08 through brutal warfare. His armies now march upon the borders of @Spiderpiggie. All semblance of law and order have disappeared from our lives. What once was the glorious paradise of IC has become a blood soaked battlefield of hot sand and twisted metal. I fear for the day that I see @pogon's battle standards start to pop up over the horizon. His reign of terror knows no mercy to it's unfortunate citizens.

We still have not been able to find the lost haven of "The Lounge" The children talk about it like some far off fairy tale castle. The adults, they're quickly starting to believe it has never existed. Just a cruel joke started by @pogon to legitimate his rule as "The last Lounge Walker."

Day 120
It has now been 4 months since the mysterious disappearance of @AmiAthena. @pogon's minor border skirmishes with @Spiderpiggie have now escalated into full blown open warfare. Many of the great tribal leaders such as @someuser, @ocegur, and even the great @AdmiralJingles have fallen in battle. The future of imgur community looks very bleak, but there are rumors that the tide may be turning.

@epigirl is smuggled out by Spiderpiggies spider network of dashing rogues. They now bide their time until Epi can reclaim her rightful place as head of the Honeybadger tribe.

The great philosopher @BonesTheRabbit has begun a quest for the legendary lost libraries of@nagoyashores, in an attempt to reclaim lost manuscripts pertaining to the whereabouts of the fabled Lounge.
Nagoya Shores is the sole librarian of the lost libraries, cursed by the gods to forever tend to the halls that contain the entirety of mankind's knowledge. This curse bestows upon you the gift of immortality, however you may never leave the library halls.

It's has been prophesied that your true love may one day set you free from your curse. You will know him by the the seal emblazoned on his coat of arms, a spider crossed with the pig.

Day 146:
A message left by @AmiAthena before her disappearance sees @pogon and @spiderpiggie temporarily put aside their differences to search for her in the South American jungle. In their absence, @StSychorecruits @ByThePowerOfSCIENCE to resurrect @ocegur via black magic.

Ocegur's reanimation went horribly wrong, as is standard in these cases, and the world is now beset by a plague of the restless dead. They rise from their graves and threaten to consume the global bacon supply unless halted. Sadly, they can only be defeated by masturbating whilst browsing the internet, which is currently not working due to having been overloaded with cat pictures by @nagoyashores, who is feeling frustrated by her imprisonment in the library.

Meanwhile, @thatonemotherfuckinguy has been building his power base, and plots to seize the last remaining Nutella reserves for himself.

These truly are dark times.

Day 189:
@pogon and @spiderpiggie meet to discuss the terms of their temporary treaty in light of the discovery of@AmiAthena's cryptic message, and the new found threat of the rapidly growing undead problem.

Meanwhile, several smaller guerrilla armies have taken hold of various locations within the wasteland, given legitimacy by their claims to protect it's citizens from the zombie outbreak. Among these leaders we have@monpetitchou, @Serjer, and @tahtienseta. These guerrilla armies have remained peaceful as of yet, but tensions are growing.

We also see turmoil to the south. The communist colonies led by @FidelSarcastro are prepping their forces, as Pogon and Spiderpiggie must advance through their territories in search of Ami.

Day 307:
During the brutal fighting between the forces of @Serjer and @monpetitchou, hundreds died. The senseless waste of life and the ravages of the fresh hordes of undead created by these killings spurred on@breakingbroke to find a cure for the post-mortem affliction.

Working within @tahtienseta's domain, agents of @FidelSarcastro were able to send peaceful overtures to many of the new, warring, leaders. Among them, @avatar720 and @adhominem chose to bring their kingdoms under his banner.

As the Ever-Sarcastic-Army rallied for the final assault on the remaining bandit-kings of Imgur Community,@spiderpiggie's re-emergence from the jungle (bearing the dessicated, spider-filled corpse of the far-too-trusting @pogon) was enough to cause both sides to lay down arms and gather for parley.

It was at this moment that the cure was announced.

Spiderpiggie's unholy children were chosen to spread the cure, feasting on the zombies as they did so, and growing into a new threat themselves to the scattered remnants of the world. Under spiderpiggie's telepathic control, they attached themselves as mind-controlling parasites to many of the living. Spiderpiggie's kingdom is a place of despair and cobwebs.

FidelSarcastro's uniting of the people and herding them into his communes was seen as an heroic act, saving them from a fate possibly as bad as death, but it was merely feeding into his dark lust for power. He now controls 60% of the remaining population.

Fortunately, @outset still roams the wastes with his trusty machete. Surely if anybody can take up the quest to find AmiAthena and bring peace to the shattered world, he can?

Day 317:
The lone warrior @outset finds himself in the lost libraries of Nagoyashores. Met by the immortal librarian, the lone warrior was given food and shelter. Here, the librarian discovers that outset is actually a smouldering hot female warrior, the descendant of Xena.

Knowing that the quest to find AmiAthena is impossible to do alone, the wise librarian advises outset to find the other female queen warriors who are hiding in the Amazonian jungle. There are@MySpiritAnimalisBillMurray the queen of justice, @Medusax the healer, and @SkincareandSkittles the queen of animal whisperers.

However, the journey to the jungle is nothing but perilous. Can outset make it there safely all on her own?

Day 318:
Remembering the prophecy regarding the intertwined destinies of herself and @Spiderpiggie,@nagoyashores seeks him out to ask for aid in the quest to find @AmiAthena.

While Spiderpiggie is now a dried up husk of of the man he once was, and his heart blacker than depths of hell, he too once searched for the savior of our land. Possibly he can be redeemed by the love of the lovely Nagoya?

A dirty, discarded journal is found, which is discovered to belong to the long forgotten @BonesTheRabbit. It is unknown whether he is still alive, or if he even still searches for the libraries. I wonder what he will think when he discovers somebody else made it there before him?

Day 318 1/2 ??
Meanwhile, @FidelSarcastro's has now taken reign over most of the remaning popuation. Little does he know that there are those who seek to resist against him, including epigirl, @AdmiralJingles , and @Serjerwhom many believe died. They are seeking help from the minds of @codinghorror, @totalnerduk, and@philoseraptor. Together with them they are sure to overthrow the dictator Sarcastro.

Somewhere in Australia @AmiAthena fights against her captors. They demand that she give them the information about the precious treasure of IC. But, as the Khal IC that she is she refuses to say one word. She just looks to the day that her rescuers will come.

Day 319:
The journal of @BonesTheRabbit is revealed to be full of Adventure Time fanfiction, as prophesied by the great soothsayer @FidelSarcastro.
@nagoyashores believes this to be an elaborate cipher and sets to work cracking the code.
@Spiderpiggie masturbates vigorously, and ejaculates spiders.

Day 320:
Whispers in the darkness.
It has been nearly a year since the disappearance of @AmiAthena. The land has been scoured by conflict and the ravages of time. Something stirs in the shadows. With the crumbling of stones, a lone paw grasps desperately at the side of a cliff. The fall is steep. @BonesTheRabbit emerges from the depths with a cough, eyes peering up at the bleak skies above. There is much to be done.
Tales of the growing reign of terror between @FidelSarcastro and @Spiderpiggie have reached the rabbit's long ears, though there is little show of concern for the ongoing warfare. Noting the marks of another traveller having come before, @BonesTheRabbit furrows a brow. There is a voice in the distance, calling out with an ancient and unquenched hunger. But it must be stifled. Leaning heavily on a cane, the rabbit pulls up a silken cowl, and enters the lost libraries of @nagoyashores.

@nagoyashores is still trying to crack the code of the diary of @BonesTheRabbit little knowing that the very author of that book is on his way to her.

@FidelSarcastro continues to wage war upon those remaining leaders who still dare to fight against his newly formed empire. Even with the help of three masterminds the armies of @epigirl08, @AdmiralJinglesand @Serjer are forced to retreat.
Things are even worse for @tahtienseta whose army was decimated as first line of defence. It is rumoured that the great leader is driven to exile and is now hiding somewhere in the ruins of Finland waiting for opportunity to rise again against growing power of @FidelSarcastro.

Meanwhile the lone warrior @outset continues her quest to find the lost queen warriors from the jungles of Amazon...

Day 320 and 1/2
FidelSarcastro sits in the only working automobile (Ford Escort. Small, but still a status symbol in his capital city). With @merlington at the wheel, he enjoys a sandwich, a luxury since The Fall. He stares out the the window as he chews, nodding to his warriors and citizens, who were ever so grateful that the FidelSarcastro would acknowledge their presence.
A rock suddenly hits the car, making a spiderweb crack on the window just inches from FidelSarcastro's face. A small boy stands poised with another rock, ready to let it fly.

"@merlington, stop the car." He steps out of the Escort and slowly makes his way to the boy. The boy backs away, his projectile ready, when a young woman grabs his hand and scolds him. She looks fearfully at Fidel as he comes ever closer. A large crowd starts to gather and soldiers chuckle at the boy's impending doom.

"He didn't mean it. He's just a boy. Please." She begged. FidelSarcastro kneels down and looks the boy in the eyes. There was no fear behind it.
"Is this your son?" he asked her without looking away from the boy.
"Yes." She replied.
"And what's your name, young woman?"
"My name is @SomethingSomethingTraLaLa." Fidel looks over both of them, obvious refugees from neighboring nations. They look as if they hadn't eaten for days. FidelSarcastro hands the boy the rest of his sandwich, and orders one of the soldiers to give the woman some food.
@SomethingSomethingTraLaLa looks at him with grateful eyes and whispers, "Thank you."
As he steps back into the Ford Escort, @merlington asks, "Why didn't you have the boy flogged?"
He leans back on the seat and sighs. "Appearances. Win their hearts, and their lives are yours." Merlington nods.

FidelSarcastro stretches out in the back seat, his feet against the broken window. "Contact @WarBear. Have him fetch The Librarian."

Day 321:
@HawasKaPujari is executed by firing squad at the order of @FidelSarcastro for his disrespectful attitude. The population mourns their fallen priest of lust.
@Spiderpiggie masturbates vigorously and ejaculates spiders. Again.

Day 322:
The bullet-riddled corpse of @HawasKaPujari (resembling a swiss cheese due to the sheer number of bullets) is fired into the sun to ensure that he doesn't come back as a mindless undead creature of darkness. His body is burned to ash, atomised, and those atoms are dispersed on the solar wind.

He won't be back. But his memory is already revered, and dozens of people meet nightly to pray in his name. Most of them are praying that they meet a nice hooker they can settle down with.

Day 323:
Long since forgotten @thatonemotherfuckinguy's minions slowly continue the construction of his Nutella fortress. His rise to power is slow, but steady. He uses his hordes of Nutella as a bargaining commodity to strengthen his foothold in the kingdom. Many of the prevalent local politicians such as @molly1969, and@avatar720 have already fallen to his influence.

Meanwhile in the domain of @Spiderpiggie, the corrupted king summons the power of darkness in an attempt to retrieve @HawasKaPujari's essence from the afterlife. Millions of @Spiderpiggie's minions were sacrificed, but the spell was a success. Hawas walks among the living once again!

The rogue for hire, @MollyButler hears of this revival, and immediately stabs @HawasKaPujari through the heart with a poisoned blade. I guess he's dead again after all.

Day 373:
Enormous stone blocks engraved with the image of @AmiAthena's face are discovered in a ruined temple built by mesoamerican jaguar worshippers. @FidelSarcastro's archeologists immediately summon their leader, who is helicoptered in by @merlington just in time to see the temple seized by@thatonemotherfuckinguy's forces, desperate to raid the basements of the temple in search of any Nutella that might have been stored there.

@Spiderpiggie, having made peace with @MollyButler after her murder (and subsequent re-incineration) of the revived @HawasKaPujari, arrives with hordes of his spider children (he's been masturbating a lot), and the stage is set for a battle royale.

Unfortunately, it rains. Nobody wants to fight in the rain, and so they all settle down in their camps and wait for the sun to come out.

Meanwhile, in the library, @nagoyashores pores over the tome left behind by the sage @BonesTheRabbit, unaware that the sage himself has been steadily making his way towards her sanctum in the heart of the library for weeks.

Day 374:
It is still raining in the jungle. Elsewhere, @outset and his/her followers are sitting in the fire-scarred ruins of a Dunkin Donuts, when they see movement among the piles of rubble. They give chase, and trail a mysterious hooded figure across the shattered remains of Los Angeles. Trapping the stranger in an abandoned warehouse, they force him to lower his hood and reveal himself as @Petesneak. He warns them that he has information of grave importance for them, and that he will deliver it in due course.

He calls upon the power of the Elder Gods, and is whisked away in a blaze of light by @undercovergiraffeand @CanadianBacon9001 in an Imgur-branded flying saucer before the band can question him further. They resolve to continue their trek towards the jungle.

As night falls, the group are watched by yet another mysterious figure, who this time is cloaked in shadow. And a cloak, too. Why not?

Far to the east, @epigirl08 rolls her eyes sarcastically at @totalnerduk, who gives her an insolent grin.

Day 375:
Taking the hood and clock off @AmiAthena stood atop the high sky scraper. She watched as @outset, and @Petesneak are taken away by the the demi-gods. It's for the better, any way, she thinks. If they think this is bad then they don't want to be here when the gods get involved. She touches the scars on her arms, reminding her of the torments of her past. Soon she will have to come out of hiding and reveal the truth...

Day 375 and 7/10ths:
@FidelSarcastro continues to reign over the land in relative comfort, unaware that his regime may soon be coming to an end. His trusted driver and friend, @merlington, has begun to plot against him. She is no longer content being a mere driver, she deserves more! Much more!

@Spiderpiggie, alerted to this recent development by one of his strategically placed spies, comes forth and offers his strength, and @MollyButler's sword, to Merlington. With Fidel out of the way, he may yet again regain power.

In a land far far away, @AmiAthena's once captor, @kg989 spectates the events occurring in the wasteland with his scrying mirror. Everything is in place. Events will soon unfold in his favor. Ami may not be the savior they once knew...

Day 390:
They looked to the wasteland. They couldn't believe that their quest had brought them all the way back to where they had begun. @outset wiped the sweat from his brow and looked back to@MySpiritAnimalisBillMurray, @Medusax, and @SkincareandSkittles. They had looked so worn; the hope that once filled their eyes now a distance memory. I should just tell them to go home and live the rest of their lives in what little peace they can find.

Just then @AmiAthena appeared before them! "Come with me! There are more who seek the same peace you are searching for. Together we can defeat this evil."

@Spiderpiggie looked into the eyes of @FidelSarcastro for the last time before the sword of@MollyButler fell on his neck. Thus ended the reign of Sarcastro, but would Spiderpiggie be any better?

Some wondered if @BonesTheRabbit would ever find "The Lounge" or if it was all just a legend.

Day 391:
The journal of @BonesTheRabbit is finally deciphered. It begins as a simple outline of mathematics practice shortly before the disappearance of @AmiAthena. But it isn't long before the scripture devolves into rambling. There are cryptic mentions of a grim prophecy, and the Era of Downvotes. But before its full significance can be determined, a voice sounds out to break the long silence.

"Librarian. I have come for the manuscripts."

In the doorway of the inner sanctum stands the rabbit sage, weary from a long journey. There is a spark of madness in his eyes, though it is swiftly dispelled.

@Undercovergiraffe, @CanadianBacon9001 and @Petesneak continue flying through space in their Imgur-branded flying saucer.
Spinning in endless circles, around and around and around.
"@sarapls" cries @CanadianBacon9001.
His cries echo, lost, across the barren imgur wastelands like quiet thunder.

@merlington is running through the sewers, the footsteps of her pursuers echoing along the narrow walls. The loyal subjects of FidelSarcastro have been hunting her for over a week in order to exact revenge for her betrayal. She rounds the corner and hides in an alcove as her pursuers run past her. She allows herself a sigh of relief as she doubles back. She reaches a hidden door and enters, calling out, "I'm back. Sorry it took so long. I had to ditch some fools."

The figure at the desk didn't make a sound as he studied the tomes and maps in front of him.
"I brought what you asked for. It wasn't easy. There's hardly enough for anyone to eat." The figure says nothing. Merlington cleared her throat, thinking maybe he didn't hear her.
"I heard you. No need to make guttural sounds." The figure stretched and turned around. FidelSarcastro started licking his paw and sighed deeply. "Those fools. Those poor human fools. I don't know why I'm bothering to help them. I guess I have a soft spot for belly scratches."

Merlington approaches and puts a can of cat food on FidelSarcastro's desk. "It's all I can find. I'm sorry."
FidelSarcastro turns back to the maps. He's staring intently at the jungle area. He sincerely hopes@warbear is able to reach The Librarian on time. "It's the only way." he whispered to himself.

Merlington goes to the corner of the room where his beheaded meatsuit lay. There was no way to fix it. All that hard work trying to unite everyone in order to save them, destroyed by a sadistic despot.
________________________________________
@warbear is deep in the jungle, the night sky blocked by thick foliage. He is accompanied by @Jerduh, probably the best archer in the land, and @diecidedad, unmatched in the lumberjack arts. Warbear is scanning the map that FidelSarcastro gave him, searching for the best way to get to The Library. According to the map, it's very close, but the dense jungle hides any sign of its entrance.

Jerduh sits by the fire, poking at it with one of her arrows. Diecidedad sharpens his axe, stealing glances at Jerduh every now and then. Warbear stands up suddenly and throws his knife into the jungle, just barely missing the nose of @outset. Her band takes to arms, and Diecidedad comes to Warbear's side as Jerduh nocks three arrows in her bow.
"Who are you and what do you want?!" @MySpiritAnimalisBillMurray yells.
Warbear puts his throwing knife down and gives her a quizzical look. "My Queen?"
BillMurray lowers her sword and starts to laugh. "General, do you come here often?" She said with a wink.
Warbear blushes. "We're under orders from FidelSarcastro to find The Librarian." he managed to stammer out.
"That old cat? What does he want with The Librarian?"
@skincareandskittles looks at @Medusax and whispers, "Old cat?" Medusax shrugs.
Warbear gives BillMurray a concerned look and says, "He thinks that she's the only one who can save us now."

Day... 400? Where are we at again?
Finally, after all this time, @Spiderpiggie has reclaimed his rightful place as supreme leader of the wasteland. Slaying @FidelSarcastro was only the first step. He must now conquer, or assimilate each of the individual powers that had sprung up in his absence. He would unite the nations under a banner of death and darkness. But first... breakfast!

Spider ordered the kitchen staff to prepare him a luxurious feast of fruitloops and cinnibons, a breakfast fit for a king. He then sat down at the royal table as a maid servant placed in front of him the biggest most delectable cinnibon ever seen in the kingdom. Being the fat little piggie that he is, the new ruler immediately started stuffing his face. But... something wasn't right...

His throat on fire, and blood seeping out the corner of the eyes, Spider came to realize he'd been poisoned. As he convulsed on the floor, the same maid servant that had served him his meal leaned over him and whispered, "Remember my name, I am @epigirl08, slayer of kings. You die at my hand."

Spiderpiggie lay dead on the floor. The throne now empty. Who will claim the empty title of ruler of the wastelands?

Day 400 part 2:
The great seer, @spacewolves, who had earlier fortold of the intertwining destinies of the librarian@nagoyashores, and the now deceased @Spiderpiggie, awoke from his sleep with a jolt. The passing of Spiderpiggie rocked through him with the force of 10,000 bolts of lightning. This was not supposed to happen. The Librarians fate was closely tied to that of the dead king.
Nagoya will be mortal now, her curse broken. Without Spiders power to sustain her, her immortal years will come flooding back with a vengeance, and the libraries, which unbeknownst to her were tied to her life force, will crumble away. He must find her and warn her. She will not have much time left.

This does not bode well for @BonesTheRabbit quest.

In another corner of the land, someone once again attempts to resurrect @HawasKaPujari, but it fails. He rejoins the world for but a second, before he again dies a terrible death.

day 412
The beast trudges through the darkness. It's foot falls heavy and slow. The rasping wet sound of it's breath rolls through the rocky corridors. Spiders and centipedes fall from it and scurry along the ground further into the darkness of the cave as their former host moves on. It stops and hulks its load over it's shoulder. The warm scent of death and smoke awaits it further in whatever lair it seeks to enter, further shrouded in the inky black.
Wandering nearly blindly through the tunnels for hours the beast enters a cavern were torches burn. Spiders, centipedes, snakes, other creatures of evil clamour over each other to writhe against a tremendous gate. The beast pays them no mind. He plods through them, bones, shells, and guts snapping and popping under it's feet. He stops at the threshold of the gate and lets out a roar. It's maw of long sharp fangs is opens to the light of the fires and a terrible sound comes from it's throat. Not a proper beastly sound but something dark and raspy, something wrong. It was the kind of noise that fit the broken and jagged abomination that it was. The creatures swarming the gate made way as if recognizing the beat's right to passage.
The gate begins to swing open to reveal a huge cavern behind it. Lesser beasts, minions and creatures of evil swarm the floor, clamoring over scraps of meat, baubles, weapons, their right to space or breath. They move away with hushed whispers in sight of the beast and the body it carried. under the light of the bonfires and torches the beast was illuminated as it trudged deeper into the hall towards the dais where upon a throne of twisted carnage and scorched bones it's ghastly master sat, presiding over the darkness. The beast was clothed in rags, tattered vestments of the humanity it had lost. His body smashed but working. His once healthy human form had been broken several times over. his limbs featuring sickly bends and scars where his flesh had been mended and twisted back together all for one arm that was covered in a sleeve of clawed, black armor. All across him scares, scorches, stitches, staples, arrow shafts and bullet holes covered its flesh, visible through it's tattered clothes as they shifted across it's body. Spiders, and centipedes crawled over him, through him, and his clothes, Shaking through ports in his head, favoring the empty socket of his left eye. The beast borne from the hollow shell of the once great warlord @pogon He stopped before the dais and tossed the body he had carried onto it and roared again.
The body landed and rolled onto it's back. The corpse's face was curled in anger, crusted foam and blood at his mouth. @Spiderpiggie. The dark king chuckled in a dry sinister voice, like the rustle of autumn leaves caught in the wind. He shifted in his abominable throne. With a flick of his hand two bull skulls at the top of the throne were set alight with an inner flame. They cast light upon the dais.
He was a wicked looking man. Dark, ragged robes surrounded his body. His long bony fingers flicked like the legs of a great spider. A crown of oil black bones adorned his head. Teeth of various men and beast from the rings that bound them to his crown, from the strings of them that looped around his neck and chest. The dark king @kg989 smiled. A maw full of the same inhuman fangs was bared to the fire light. Serpents and centipedes slithered through his throne, crawled between the folds of his robes. Perched atop his crown.
He reached out one hand palm up and curled his fingers. A unnatural wind crept through the cavern, forcing itself into @Spiderpiggie's throat. It filled his lungs. Slowly his body began to twitch and writhe as unlife seeped into it. @kg989 smiled and chuckled. He made a motion with his hand toward himself and@Spiderpiggie's body was jerked up to sit before him, His eyes were peeled open by an unseen force and made to gaze upon the lord of the cave.
"No need to die just yet good warrior. There's still a war to wage." @kg989 said in his dry sinister voice.

Meanwhile hidden away in the wastelands @amiathena meets with @outset. “Now is the time to take the throne,” outset urged. Ami was hesitant. She wasn’t ready. This was never what she wanted. All she wanted was to own a small cottage in the middle of the forest and own 17 kitties. She doesn’t even know what happened to all of the kitties...all of the kitties…
”Ami? Hello?”
“Kitties!”
“It’s time!” @outset demanded. “The demon lords @kg989 and @spiderpiggie have already been resurrected. Soon they will make their move. If we do not move tonight we will lose our chance. We must take the opportunity that is in front of us!” Behind them @Medusax hungrily listened to every word, waiting for the perfect time to share it with her master.

The dark corridor that @MySpiritAnimalisBillMurray and @epigirl08 met in was damp and unpleasant but perfect for a meeting such as this. “Do you have the payment?” @epigirl08 asked.@Myspiritanimalisbillmurray took out the small package and handed it to her. “The kings head comes with a hefty price. It took me some time to find this.” @epigirl08 walk away with the package, holding it close to her heart.

Day 420:
With his loyal guards @TheGingersaurus and @littlegoblin looking on anxiously, Warlord Jingles finally began to stir. This was the first time in over three months that he had shown any signs of waking from his slumber.
A terrible battle had raged on day 320 between the armies of Jingles, alongside his allies @epigirl08 and@Serjer, and the host of demon cat lord @FidelSarcastro. Despite the fierce fighting prowess and technology of the allies, Fidel's hordes were too much and soon overwhelmed the ranks. The allies' armies were broken, hunted and slaughtered. Never one to hide behind the lines, Jingles led from the front and had been gravely wounded attempting to hold the line. His two loyal guards had only just managed to pull him onto a horse and ride as fast as they could toward the forest. Without knowing the fates of his allies, his armies scattered, and his kingdom about to be overrun they had sought shelter in a deep cave and did their best to keep Jingles alive.
Jingles' hand suddenly grabbed @TheGingersaurus's arm, and his eyes shot open as he pulled her in close. "Where is she?" he whispered. @TheGingersaurus, speaking slowly said,"we're unsure of the fate of the Librarian sire, there was not enough time to get her to safety before.....before....." She no longer needed to speak; he knew what she was trying to tell him. His eyes glinted with rage as he imagined what@FidelSarcastro may have done to his beloved @nagoyashores.
Wincing in pain, he began to pull himself up as both @TheGingersaurus and @littlegoblin tried to stop him. He held up his hand to stop them. "Bring me my armor and weapons. There is no more time for lounging about, we must find her. We must see if there are any loyal subjects left for us to rally." "But Lord Jingles, everyone believes you to be dead, and we have kept it quiet for fear that you would be killed before you awoke," stammered @littlegoblin. Jingles looked up at him as he buckled on his armor with a sneer. "You ride ahead @littlegoblin, and let them know that rumors of my demise have been greatly exaggerated. I will not stop until I get back what is mine."

Day 427:
A week has passed since the reemergence of the long since thought dead, @AdmiralJingles. As one of the original tribal leaders before the great war of the wastelands, the people have rallied around him in support of his claim to the throne. There have been further mutterings of war due to the Admiral amassing armies.
During the turmoil that surrounded the previous kings death @thatonemotherfuckinguy finished his fortress, and those who did not recognize AdmiralJingles claim to the throne, instead sided with Guy, and claimed thathe was the most logical heir. It is thought that a clash of armies is imminent.
Meanwhile the seer @SpaceWolves travels to Jingles encampment, and requests an audience with the Admiral. It is known that the Admiral has history with @nagoyashores, and he hopes that with his help, they can find a way prevent the death of the librarian. She grows weaker by the day.
Unbeknownst to the wastelanders, @kg989 continues to pull the strings of many officials in the kingdom. His forces will soon make themselves known. Most of them do not know of @AmiAthena's release, and those that do will never suspect that she too has fallen under his influence.

Day 477:
The Librarian looked into the sun. The sun. It had been so long since she had seen the sun. She could feel it’s warmth on her skin sinking in. A voice called out to her from the left. “@nagoyashores! I have come with the information you wanted!” @skincareandskittles approaches @nagoyashores and relays to her@AmiAthena is now under the influence of @kg989 . The Librarian, still mourning over her lost library but knowing that she must play a role in this great battle decides to go meet with The Great Seer,@spacewolves.
@Medusax walks up the long, winding stairway. The shadows on the wall making her jump, approaches the door to her master. Lightly she knocks. No answer. Again she knocks. No answer. She lifts her fist to knock again but the door opens. A fireplace in the middle of the room set the stage. This was once a very elegant room but now it has fallen to dispar. In front of the fireplace a worn, high rimmed chair. And in that chair….@ocegur.

Day 483
As @Spiderpiggie is struggling to get used to his new demon body he stumbles upon an abandon missile silo in the middle of the wasteland of New Detroit...

Day 491:
As support for the long thought dead @AdmiralJingles swells by each passing day and the throngs of his devout followers shadow his every footstep it is clear to all that the inevitable war with the forces of@thatonemotherfuckinguy will soon be upon the Wasteland.
Upon whisper from his spies that the elusive @SpaceWolves has slipped between the lines of his forces to meet with Jingles, there is only one course of action that seems clear to thatguy. He must travel to the fringe of the Wasteland and meet with the League of Scales and seek out their leader @CaptMacMillan to attempt to reach a deal on the swift and silent end of Jingles to prevent his forces from reaching the fortress of thatguy and ending the long and bloody siege before it even begins.

Day 512:
The forces of @AdmiralJingles are massing on a hilltop, and the fortress of @thatonemotherfuckinguy is besieged. In desperation, he has followed the advice of @CaptMacMillan and asked @kg989 for help.
All of his precious Nutella has been given to the dark lord, and he has nothing left, except for the armies of undead spiders under the command of General @Spiderpiggie. The outcome of this battle will decide his fate.
He softly caresses @BonesTheRabbit's long ears, and tells the sage that he can do no more here, and should flee. @SpaceWolves will need Bones' help in the days to come if they are to free @AmiAthena from kg989's grip.
Meanwhile, the resurrected @ocegur and @Medusax have devised a plan, and are mere hours from the fortress of thatonemotherfuckinguy. But they will arrive too late.
When all seems lost, and the victory of Admiral Jingles is all but assured, a familiar Imgur-branded flying saucer appears, and snatches up ocegur and Medusax. But will it deposit them at Castle Nutella to deliver it from its perilous alliance and save the inhabitants from the Jingling Horde, or will it take them elsewhere, to stranger adventures?

Day 512 1/2:
Although @SpaceWolves successfully made it to @AdmiralJingles, they were unsuccessful in finding a way to prevent the fall of the great libraries, and the death of the librarian @nagoyashores.
@kg989 finally puts his long laid plans into motion, and full fledged war has taken hold of the wastelands. At the command of Spiderpiggie, KG's forces quickly decimate the still mourning Jingles army. Many die in this terrible battle, including @littlegoblin and @TheGingersaurus. The admiral was converted to the dark cause due to the influence of KG's power. Also he's terribly afraid of spiders, which is kinda Spiderpiggies thing.
@thatonemotherfuckinguy's armies retreat for the time being, as they have no chances of defeating the dark army, now bolstered with Jingles former troupes.
With the library gone and the librarian dead, @BonesTheRabbit and @SpaceWolves band together and focus their attentions on freeing @AmiAthena from the dark lords grip.
@littlegoblin managed to flee Jingles army, however was later eaten alive by a grue, who had absolutely no part in this conflict whatsoever.

Day 512 1/2 and a little bit more:
The assassins sent by the League of Scales by their indomitable leader, @CaptMacMillan, arrive at the scene of the last remnants of the Jingling Horde in full retreat. Their mission taken care of by the forces of@thatonemotherfuckinguy the League retreats back to their mountain home to play go fish and snort goldfish crumbs.

Day 512 2/3:
@Ocegur and @Medusax did indeed arrive at Castle Nutella too late. But they were able to offer@BonesTheRabbit and @SpaceWolves a ride.
With a blinding flash of interdimensional power, the saucer ripped a hole in spacetime and passed directly through to the place that had been sought for so long everybody had forgotten they were looking for it.
@CanadianBacon9001 and @undercovergiraffe stepped out with ocegur, Medusax, Bones, and SpaceWolves into the slightly dusty air of...
 Spiderpiggie:
"The Lounge"
In a chair, half-shrouded in shadow, half radiating a subtle light, @nagoyashores stirred.
"Doubtless", she said, "You're wondering how I came to be here, alive..."...

Day 515
@Kg989, now in control of the wastelands, held @amiathena as his captor. He had long awaited this day. Ever since they were in middle school he always he admired her strength. He wisdom. Her beauty...a beauty that had almost been washed away by the harshness of these past years. But it wasn’t completely gone. There was a knock on the door. @amiathena was ushered into his bed chamber. A warm feel rose in his stomach. Oh, yes. This is what he always wanted. He approached her and just as, to the right,@SpaceWolves and @BonestheRabbit crash through the window! “Don’t lay a hand on her, you filthy mongrel!” snapped @SpaceWolves clutching @Kg989 by the neck with a small dagger.@BonestheRabbit took @AmiAthena into his arms and helped her climb up the rope he and@SpaceWolves used to get into the castle.
“Do you think you’re just going to walk right out of here?” snarked @Kg989.
“No. We’re going to fly out of here and you’re not going to remember our faces.” With that @SpaceWolvesblew a forgetting powder into his mouth given to him by @nagoyashores just before she died. He climbed the rope and into the imgur imprinted space ship and headed into the horizon towards The Lounge.

Day 515 1/4:
Alone in the bedchamber, @kg989 sighed disconsolately, looking in the direction of the departing saucer. As he unfurled his gigantic bat wings and prepared to give chase, @epigirl08 slipped in through the broken door, and slipped her tiny hand into his.
"Don't go after her," she begged him. "She never wanted you. She'll never feel the way about you that I do".
He turned towards the tiny human, regarding her with astonishment.
"You mean..." his voice caught, as his emotions overwhelmed him.
"Yes", she replied. "I love you, you gigantic monstrosity. I always have!"
They embraced tenderly in the ruined chamber, watched only by @SirGrumps, eyeing them with a telescope from the ground as he waited for them to consummate their love.
What happened to BreakingBloke:
The forgotten and unappreciated genius @BreakingBroke wandered through the remains of New York, concrete and glass canyons echoing with her footsteps and little else. Since saving the world from the zombie plague, she had wandered alone and friendless.
As she sighed, and prepared to bed down for the night at the foot of a skyscraper which had seen better days, a lone pigeon fluttered down beside her. She smiled at the bird, which seemed to symbolise hope for the future, and reached out to pet it.
The bird coo'ed, perched on her fingers, and as she smiled again, it fluttered its wings and shat on her hand before flying away. Broke sighed again, and continued setting up her camp for the night. Someday, she vowed, she would make the ungrateful world pay for forgetting her.
When I die she thought, I'm going to haunt the shit out of everybody.