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MrFluffyVegas

Glasses

Apr 11th, 2012
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  1. >been about a year with fluffy pony
  2. >early time with it was everything you were ever told
  3. >she was so cute and adorable, babbling all the time about all the fun she was having
  4. >loved to play with her ball more than anything, besides you
  5. >it was a large ball and she would try to climb on top of it and ride it sometimes
  6. >she was out of control sometimes and gave you quite a few scares
  7. >like the time she tried to jump off the roof to hug the moon, still can't believe you caught her into time
  8. >or the time you found her in the fridge
  9. >she said "I wan-n-n-ned po-s-s-s-s-icle!" she said chattering her teeth
  10. >you spent the whole night warming her up in a hot bath
  11. >surprisingly she survived through all of it
  12. >but lately she's been acting weird
  13. >it all started when she found these old glasses of yours in the closet
  14. >put them on and said she was a smart pony now
  15. >she looked so cute that you let her keep them
  16. >after that she started to behave strangely
  17. >she's never excited to see you anymore
  18. >still speaks in baby english, but seems more condescending
  19. >ask her if she wants to play with her favorite ball
  20. >she pushes ball away
  21. >"ball used to be more fun. not as fun anymore. ball suck now."
  22. >you call her over for food time
  23. >"C'mon fluffy pony! Foodie time"
  24. >she used to love it when you called it foodie time
  25. >"whadeva. food taste bad now. not like it used to taste. they make food taste bad."
  26. >every so often she says that something is 'they're' fault
  27. >you ask her if something is making her feel sad, and if there's anyway you can help
  28. >she only responds "you wouldn't understand. you haven't been here long enough like I was."
  29. >call up your vet to ask what the problem is
  30. >vet tells you that your fluffy pony has contracted the 'hipster virus'
  31. >she can't get excited about anything anymore and she will constantly moan about the way the world used to be being better
  32. >vet tells you there is no cure, and that every moment your fluffy pony continues to live is agony for her
  33. >there's only one solution, death
  34. >you tell vet you don't care how much of a hipster your pony is you still love her
  35. >you didn't know what you were getting into
  36. >fluffy hipster pony gets much worse
  37. >fluffy pony moans and groans all day long about how much life sucks
  38. >worst part is that every time you look at fluffy pony you can see how much pain she is in
  39. >finally decide that the vet was right
  40. >want to do it humanly, so you bring in fluffy pony to be put down
  41. >vet surprised you didn't just throw her in a wood chipper
  42. >"oh god that's so grimdark, that's not what fluffy pony used to be about. you've made fluffy pony horrible."
  43. >vet looks at her with pity in his eyes
  44. >injects fluffy pony as it continues to complain
  45. >her breathing slows down
  46. >"this... is not... what... fluffy pony... should be... about... it was better..."
  47. >her last words
  48. >go out and get a new fluffy pony at the fluffy pony store
  49. >she's as adorable as she should be, bouncing around full of energy and mirth
  50. >when you get home she sees the glasses of the old fluffy pony on the ground
  51. >she walks over to them prepared to inspect them
  52. >your foot comes down on the spectacles with a thundering crunch
  53. >fluffy pony looks up at you confused
  54. >"Come on sweetheart, lets go play with your new ball."
  55. >"BALL!" she exclaims and runs off to play
  56. >look back at the broken glasses
  57. >go to play with fluffy pony
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