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- >been about a year with fluffy pony
- >early time with it was everything you were ever told
- >she was so cute and adorable, babbling all the time about all the fun she was having
- >loved to play with her ball more than anything, besides you
- >it was a large ball and she would try to climb on top of it and ride it sometimes
- >she was out of control sometimes and gave you quite a few scares
- >like the time she tried to jump off the roof to hug the moon, still can't believe you caught her into time
- >or the time you found her in the fridge
- >she said "I wan-n-n-ned po-s-s-s-s-icle!" she said chattering her teeth
- >you spent the whole night warming her up in a hot bath
- >surprisingly she survived through all of it
- >but lately she's been acting weird
- >it all started when she found these old glasses of yours in the closet
- >put them on and said she was a smart pony now
- >she looked so cute that you let her keep them
- >after that she started to behave strangely
- >she's never excited to see you anymore
- >still speaks in baby english, but seems more condescending
- >ask her if she wants to play with her favorite ball
- >she pushes ball away
- >"ball used to be more fun. not as fun anymore. ball suck now."
- >you call her over for food time
- >"C'mon fluffy pony! Foodie time"
- >she used to love it when you called it foodie time
- >"whadeva. food taste bad now. not like it used to taste. they make food taste bad."
- >every so often she says that something is 'they're' fault
- >you ask her if something is making her feel sad, and if there's anyway you can help
- >she only responds "you wouldn't understand. you haven't been here long enough like I was."
- >call up your vet to ask what the problem is
- >vet tells you that your fluffy pony has contracted the 'hipster virus'
- >she can't get excited about anything anymore and she will constantly moan about the way the world used to be being better
- >vet tells you there is no cure, and that every moment your fluffy pony continues to live is agony for her
- >there's only one solution, death
- >you tell vet you don't care how much of a hipster your pony is you still love her
- >you didn't know what you were getting into
- >fluffy hipster pony gets much worse
- >fluffy pony moans and groans all day long about how much life sucks
- >worst part is that every time you look at fluffy pony you can see how much pain she is in
- >finally decide that the vet was right
- >want to do it humanly, so you bring in fluffy pony to be put down
- >vet surprised you didn't just throw her in a wood chipper
- >"oh god that's so grimdark, that's not what fluffy pony used to be about. you've made fluffy pony horrible."
- >vet looks at her with pity in his eyes
- >injects fluffy pony as it continues to complain
- >her breathing slows down
- >"this... is not... what... fluffy pony... should be... about... it was better..."
- >her last words
- >go out and get a new fluffy pony at the fluffy pony store
- >she's as adorable as she should be, bouncing around full of energy and mirth
- >when you get home she sees the glasses of the old fluffy pony on the ground
- >she walks over to them prepared to inspect them
- >your foot comes down on the spectacles with a thundering crunch
- >fluffy pony looks up at you confused
- >"Come on sweetheart, lets go play with your new ball."
- >"BALL!" she exclaims and runs off to play
- >look back at the broken glasses
- >go to play with fluffy pony
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