THE CORPORATIONS THAT LOVED SO MUCH

There once was an industry with many corporations! The corporations liked to sell video games.
“We love you so much!” they would tell people.

“We are committed to inclusive and welcoming working environments!’ read their HR manuals.
“We love you so much!” said the corporations.

One day, a big, mean group of trolls began to attack women in industry.
 “It’s about ethics!” they would say.
 They were so naughty.

“The corporations will think you’re naughty,” said the women.
“But they love us so much!” said the trolls. So they kept attacking.

The women and their friends began to fight back.
“Will you help us?” they asked the corporations.
“We love you so much!” they replied.

The trolls told the corporations, “We will not buy your games or processors!”
“We love you so much!” said the corporations.

“But will you help us?” the women begged.
“We support helping people,” said the corporations.
 But still they would not help.

The women revealed that the trolls had been using ethics as an excuse to be mean.
“Do you still love them?"
“I guess,” said the corporations.

The trolls began propping up harassers.
“Do you still love them?” asked the women.
“We are against harassment,” said the corporations.

The trolls started attacking the corporation’s workers.
“Do you still love them?” asked the women.
“We support our workers,” said the corporations.

The trolls started sending them death threats.
“Do you still love them?” asked the women.
“We are against death threats,” said the corporations.

The trolls started speaking for the corporations.
“Do you still love them?” asked the women.
“We are not being spoken for,” said the corporations.

The trolls were harboring white nazis.
“Do you still love them?” asked the women.
“We are against nazis,” said the corporations.

The sites the trolls hated were enjoying record traffic.
“Do you still love them?” asked the women.
“We support record traffic,” said the corporations.

The trolls were apologizing for child pornography.
“Do you still love them?” asked the women.
“We are against child pornography,” said the corporations.

And on it went, and the women lost so much.
“Are you okay with this?” asked the women.
“We are against losing so much,” said the corporations.

Until, finally, the women turned the trolls into a joke.
“Will you help us stop this from happening again?” they asked the corporations.

The corporations, however, we busy greenlighting sequels.
“But who will buy them?” they asked themselves.

The trolls said to the corporations, “we will!”
And so the corporations told the trolls:

“We love you so much!”

THE END