'Nishishi...'
Ouma was mischievously giggling while derailing yet another thread with his shitposting about his favorite madman character.
'Skipping school for this was totally worth it!', thought Ouma as any meaningful discussion completely disappeared in favor of waifuwars and fetishposting combined with people continuously taking his bait.
Days like these were the best! Normally he wouldn't be able to skip classes since his mother would be home right now, but she recently found a job as a swimming instructor and he was therefore free to rule supreme at home.
Their relationship was already strained since he was such a manlet, if she could see him right now she would probably snap.
And just as he finished that thought, the door was thrown open and Kirumi stormed into his room with a furious look on her face. Ouma froze and his eyes widened in reaction to his unexpected visitor, who walked straight towards him as she lifted her hand. He closed his eyes, bracing himself for the impact but all he felt was a gentle embrace.
'Oh Ouma, you might skip school and you might be a shitposter, but you're still my son...'
'M-Mom...'
'And... at least you're not a Junkofag'
'MOM!', yelled Ouma as he reciprocated his Mothers hug.
'So, tell me, why did you skip school today? Is that Kaito guy still bullying you for being a twink?'
'I-I would be able to take him on if he was on his own but that bitch Maki is always with him...'
'Well, maybe I should take him to the aquarium some time?'
'I don't know what that would accomplish but there's a scary look on your face...'
Kirumi let go of her son and looked him in the eyes with a gentle smile.
'So, why don't you call that Miu girl from your class to ask her about homework. I'm sure she would be glad to receive a call from anyone.'
'Fuck that! I would never call that disgusting slut!'
'Oh? Is that how you should talk about a girl?', asked Kirumi while looking at him with a cold stare.
'U-Uso da yo! H-haha, I was just lying, I can't believe you fell for that! But I will call her right away!'
'Excellent, however, there is one more thing I want to talk about.'
'Yes Mom?'
'I will forgive you this one time for skipping school, but I cannot forgive you for being shorter than most of the girls in your class. You can't just drink Panta and eat pancakes! You need nutrition!'
Ouma gulped, he knew what was coming next.
'So today, we will be having a feast and I don't want to hear any complaints, we are having Pig's feet.'
He complied with a weak yes as Kirumi was heading for the door, just as a very important question popped into his head.
'Mom, how did you know I wasn't at school today?'
'Well my new job... it's at your school and I was teaching your class today.', stated Kirumi before leaving the room.
Ouma felt horrible, he was supposed to be the Ultimate 4D Chess Player and yet he didn't think of such a simple thing, today was a terrible day.

Well, at least he got a lot of (You)'s.