Golden Touch 2: Chronology is for Pussies (Twilight Oneshot)

>"ANOOOOON!"
>Using your superior ninja reflexes you dodge another deadly projectile book from the purple unicorn.
>"Get back here!" she yells as you do a sweet parkour move over the 5 inch tall table.
>You always enjoyed messing with the pastel ponies.
>But out of all of them Twilight had the best reactions.
>She also looked kinda cute when she was mad.
>Last night you sneaked in to the library and rearranged almost all the books in no particular order.
>You then returned to the scene of the crime a few minutes ago just to see the reaction on her face.
>And here you are now.
>Turning to face your purple pursuer you quickly duck down to avoid a 'pocket' dictionary to the head.
>You swear you see some steam come out of her nostrils as she huffs.
>Giving her your best shit eating grin you take a step back...
>Only to find out that the wall of bookcases it directly behind you.
>Smiling triumphantly, Twilight begins to slowly advance.
>Your eyes quickly dart around the room looking for a way out.
>The thing about Twilight is that even though she may have the best reactions, she is also the most dangerous.
>Getting caught isn't a pleasant experience.
>Looking over your purple executioner you see that the door is still open.
>Grinning like a madman you sprint towards the mare.
>Clearly not expecting this action she halts her movement and stares wide eyed at you.
>Not wanting to waste time you decide to 'leapfrog' over Twilight's head.
>The jump wasn't perfect, but you still stick the land and continue your mad dash towards freedom as you leave a confused mare in your wake.
>Once your outside you'll have to either hide or get somep0ny like Rainbow Dash or Pi-
>SLAM
>Your thoughts are cut off as the literal doorway to freedom shuts in front of you, enveloped in a purple aura.
>Desperate for escape you grab the handle and pull as hard as you can.
>Unfortunately it doesn't even budge.

>"Going somewhere?" Twilight smugly taunts.
>"Come on Anon, make it easy for the both of us."
"Well Twilight that does sound like a NOVEL idea!" you shout as you throw her own ammunition back at her.
>Of course the book wasn't actually meant to hit her.
>You were an asshole, not a jerk.
>The book does do it's intended job however and distracts her just long enough for you to run up the stairs.
>If the door doesn't work you, figure the balcony is the next best thing.
>"Arrgh! Anon when I get my hooves on you-!"
>Uh oh.
>You try to run further but you only make it as far as the bed before you get the all too familiar feeling of weightlessness wash over you.
>Looks like your intellectual friend remembered she had magic.
>As you float an inch off the ground Twilight menacingly walks up the stairs.
>Once she reaches you she violently throws you onto the bed.
>POMF
"What are we gonna do on the bed Tw-"
>You are quickly silenced as a hoof is jammed in your mouth.
>"WE are not going to do anything. YOU are going to spend however long it takes to clean this library back to the way it was!"
>"Am I clear?" she asks as she removes her hoof.
>Not being able to do a whole lot against magic you proceed with your built in defense mechanism.
"You're cute when you're ang-"
>SMACK
>Rubbing your now injured jaw, you realize jokes may not be the best idea in this situation.
>"AM I CLEAR?" she asks again, emphasizing each word by hoofing you in the chest.
>Luckily you still have one more trick up your sleeve.
>Not so luckily, is that it may or may not lead to certain death.
>Worth a shot right?
>You quickly reach out and begin to scratch the base of her ear.
>Twilight's expression quickly changes from aggression to pure bliss.
>"Mmmnnnn~"
>Within seconds she's putty in your hand and is trying desperately to lean in for more.
>Not one to disappoint, you begin scratching slower yet more methodically.

>A shiver runs down her spine as you continue your effective assault.
>You take notice that one of her hind legs has begun to kick out against her will.
>In her state of bliss and uncontrollable appendages Twilight quickly loses her balance and falls on top of you.
>The proximity of your faces causes the pair of you to blush.
>Before Twilight can take control of the situation you begin your assault once again.
>"Oooh~"
>You notice her hind leg begins to kick out again.
>Continuing your assault for a few more minutes you eventually slow down so she can recompose herself.
>She begins to breathe heavily, her warm breath washing over your face.
>You begin running one finger slowly up and down her left ear to help calm her.
"Now might be a good time to mention that I moved one of the objects on your desk a little, but I'm not going to tell you which one."
>You quickly begin scratching again to avoid her wrath.
>Once again you slow down to a stop once you think she's calm.
>Sighing contently she lays her head down beside your own.
>"I hate you."
"Love you too Starbutt." you tease.
>Grabbing your hand with her hoof, Twilight places it on her ear again.
>Getting the message, you begin your patented technique, albeit a lot calmer this time.
>The mare beside you begins to softly moan once more.
>"You're lucky you're able to do this, else I'd have you thrown in the dungeon."
"Really? I assumed my abilities would have me thrown in your 'personal' dungeon." you say as you waggle your eyebrows.
>Twilight just shakes her head and rolls her eyes.
>Suddenly you are struck with another idea.
>Removing your hand from her ear you begin to lightly run the tips of your fingers along her belly.
>The effect is instantaneous and Twilight suddenly begins squirming.
>"N-no! Anon s-stop it!" she squeals, trying to worm her way out of your grasp.
>Not giving up you quickly begin running both of your hands along her belly.
>"A-aah! No! Ha, don- ha, s-s-stop!"

>Overpowering her you pull her down beside you and then position yourself on top of her.
>You continue the tickle attack for a few more moments.
>Eventually you let up, giving her a chance to breathe.
>Twilight instantly begins gasping for breath, trying to recover from your assault.
>You take this moment to gaze into her purple eyes.
>Strangely enough you hadn't noticed how beautiful they looked.
>Twilight returns the sentiment, and gives you the same goofy grin that you're wearing.
>It looks like she's trying to say something, but her lack of oxygen is making it difficult.
"Hey Twi?"
>She regulates her breathing slightly before answering.
>"Y-yeah?"
"Boop."