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AnonAlighieri

EASTER SPECIAL

Apr 8th, 2012
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  1. >Wake up
  2. >look around
  3. >Were...were you in space
  4. >Suddenly you got kicked
  5. >"GET UP!" a ...guy in a buisness suit said
  6. >Wait a guy?
  7. >Buisness suit?
  8. >Thats...dear god thats the first person you have seen in over 5 years
  9. >Ever since you Came to equestria
  10. >Getting up, you dust yourself off and looked around
  11. >Then...you remebered
  12. >You came to equestria...but you dont remeber how
  13. >Ponies are okay but...there was a great evil on the horizion...
  14. >Found out that ponies are harvested once every 100 years leaving only baby ponies to
  15.  
  16. restart ponie civilization
  17. >Remeber that this cycle had been going on for a vary long time...
  18. >But you were able to warn the ponies and they stopped the invasion...but
  19. >Then 3 years later, they invaded again, part pony, part cybernetic life forms that were
  20.  
  21. no more then husks of what they were
  22. >"WELL YOU BROKE THE CYCLE!" the man in the buisness suit yelled
  23. >Walking toward the man, you steel yourself...
  24. "Yes, and now they can go on as nature intended..." you muttered
  25. >"NATURE? YOU DO FUCKING REALIZE THERE IS NOTHING NATRUAL ABOUT THEM!" he kept yelling
  26. "I know....ive seen the signs...that humans were there first but..." you trailed off
  27. >"OH THAT, WELL HONESTY WE HAD NO IDEA HOW TO MAKE THINGS TO WORK WITH JUST HOOVES
  28.  
  29. FRANKLY" said the buisness man
  30. "Wait...what do you mean?" you ask
  31. "I REPRESENT A COMPANY WHO CREATED LITTLE PONIES IN ORDER TO HARVEST THEM, AND BY
  32.  
  33. HARVEST I MEAN ENSLAVE THEM AND SELL THEM TO LITTLE GIRLS WHO WILL LOVE THEM FOR ABOUT A
  34.  
  35. YEAR AND THEN THROW THEM OUT" he yells
  36. >Jesus does he ever stop screaming?
  37. >"BUT NOW THAT YOU HAVE RUINED EVERYTHING, WE ARE GOING TO HAVE TO DO SOMTHING
  38.  
  39. DIFFERENT" he contiuies yelling
  40. >Suddenly a platform rises and you see 3 different mechinisems
  41. >"IF YOU DECIDE TO DO NOTHING, WE KILL ALL THE PONIES AND SUE YOU FOR EVERYTHING YOU
  42.  
  43. HAVE. WE CAN'T USE THE PONIES IN THIS CYCLE BECAUSE THEY ARE TOO 'REBELLIOUS'" he
  44.  
  45. screams "IF YOU HOWEVER WANT THEIR FREEDOM, GO TO PLATFORM TO THE LEFT AND ALL THE HUSK
  46.  
  47. PONIES WILL BE SHUT DOWN AND YOU WILL NEVER HEAR FROM US AGAIN, OR YOU COULD GO TO YOUR
  48.  
  49. RIGHT AND SUBJEGATE ALL LIVING PONIES, BECOMING THEIR GOD-KING, OR YOU CAN GO DOWN THE
  50.  
  51. MIDDLE, KILLING YOURSELF AND ASCENDING ALL PONIES TO NEAR HUMAN INTELLECT" he screams as
  52.  
  53. if he was enraged
  54. >No brainer
  55. >You start slowly making your way down the left, your goal had always been to simply
  56.  
  57. save them
  58. >As you approch suddenly you were stopped and a gigantic holographic... display? It said
  59.  
  60. please enter your credit card infomation
  61. >"OH YOU DONT GET TO DO ANYTHING GOOD WITHOUT BUYING THE RIGHT TO DO IT MIND YOU" he
  62.  
  63. kept screaming
  64. "H...how mu-" you tried to ask
  65. >"50 million dollars" he said
  66. >Holy fuck...you did not have that kind of cash, neither now or when you were just
  67.  
  68. liviing a normal life
  69. >Trying to go around it, you found a forcefield blocked you
  70. >shit...that option is closed
  71. >Hey, you could become the god-king thing and then reliqiush your power...
  72. >You headed to the opposite platform...only to again, get stopped and get asked for your
  73.  
  74. credit card number
  75. "What the hell, this is rid-" you tried to say
  76. >"THATS 70 MILLION DOLLARS" he once again screemed
  77. >Jesus...
  78. >You liked the ponies
  79. >you were willing to do the unthinkable
  80. >Slowly walking down the middle path you are going to the bea-
  81. >WHAT THE FUCK ANOTHER HOLOGRAPHIC DISPLAY ASKING FOR MY CREDIT CARD NUMBER
  82. >"100 GORILLAN DOLLARS" he screamed in you ear
  83. >WHAT THE FUCK\
  84. >WHY DID YOU HAVE TO BUY ALL THE GOOD ENDINGS?
  85. >WHY WERE THEY DOIN
  86. >"TIMES UP!" the buissness man said, shooting you in your head as he begins the sanitation of Equestria.
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