Unnamed Guilty Conscience Parody of Ultimate Autism

[announcer]
Meet Eddie, nineteen years old.
Fed up with the industry and losing out on money,
he decides to pirate a video game.
But on his way to the bay, he has a change of heart.
And suddenly, his conscience comes into play...

[Dr. Red]
Alright, stop! (Huh?)
Now before you go all insane, and pirate your games,
To try and play 'em without payin'
You better think of the consequence (But who are you?)
I'm your butty loving conscience

[Emanon]
That's nonsense!
Go on, save on the money and share it with your steam friends,
Make sure that when it ends, you keep on seedin'
Don't worry you'll be safe,
You know the NSA is too busy watching people masturbate,

[Dr. Red]
Yeah but if you don't pay the devs'll get no wage,
For their epic faux game of the Gone Home age,
Piracy is wrong, kids, it's theft and illegal,
If they don't make a profit how will they fund the sequel?

[Emanon]
Fuck that! Don't be a bitch! The game might be shit!
Can you afford to take that risk? Are you that rich?
Why you give a fuck if they're paid? Are you Phil Fish?
You think if you were on fire they'd even spare you the piss?

[Dr. Red]
Man, don't do it, it's not worth it, just pay up! (You're right!)
For shitty gameplay (Stop!) And forced gay love (Oh yeah!)
Don't even listen to /v/ yo, he's bad for you
(You know what Red? I don't like your attitude..)

[announcer]
Meet Stan, thirty-one years old.
After meeting a young boy in an MMO, he finds out he's after a rare item which Stan has.
Always in need of more money, he considers how badly he can rip the kid off.
Once again, his conscience comes into play...

[Emanon]
Now listen up, whilst you're dressed like a slut,
Slow walk and show off your butt, don't tell him that you have nuts,
Now all you gotta do is sell at extortionate prices...
(Dude! He seems like a really nice kid,
You shouldn't take advantage of him, that's messed up)
Yo, look at the trader.. buy the rest up (Uh huh!)
He'll pay more if no other offer's out,
So wring the fucker clean then buy yourself that new mount,
(Man, ain't you ever heard of common courtesy?)
That just sounds like a bunch of faggot words to me,
(I'll tell the admin, you're gonna get banned)
Good luck with that, nigger, I'm in the admin's clan..

[announcer]
Meet Chris, a thirty-four year old trainwreck of an autist.
After parking his tug boat and taking his vitamins, he walks in the door of fucking Gamestop,
To find that they've changed his favourite character, very slightly.

[Dr. Red]
Alright calm down, relax, don't get a rag on,

[Emanon]
Fuck that shit, these cunts are trying to change the canon,
While you ain't looking they go and turn Sonic's arms blue,
FUCK making a vid, BOMB THE FUCKING HQ!!!

[Dr. Red]
Wait! What if there's an explanation for this mate?
(What? He tripped? Fell? Landed in some paint!?)
Alright /v/, maybe he's right C
But think about Sonichu before you go crazy

[Emanon]
Okay! Thought about it, want to deface them?
Hit 'em with your car, slice your gooch up and then mace 'em?
That's what I'd do, be smart, don't be a retard
You gonna listen to someone who paid for us to make Gilda Mars?!

[Dr. Red]
What'chu say? (What's wrong? Didn't think I'd remember?)
I'ma kill you motherfucker!

[Emanon]
Uhhh-aahh! Temper temper!
Mr. Le, Mr. copy and paste,
Mr. Meme stole 'em straight outta 4chan, upvote my gay page,
How in the fuck you gonna tell this sperg not to get violent?

[Dr. Red]
Cause it's wrong to manipulate him for amusement
Don't just deface that.. aw fuck it...
/v/'s right. Kill 'em all Chris, where's your mace at?